Chapter 15 #2
Seth came over to Ren’s side, as Tony went into the bar proper to get Lennox and Jonas.
“Did you know it was going to turn out like this?” Ren asked him as he tucked himself into Ren’s side, pressing close.
“That Tony would eventually come around to the idea of partnering with him? Hell no,” Seth said with a low chuckle.
“When I told him the idea, he looked at me like I’d grown a second head.
But then two days later he called me and said, what if we ask him to be our friend, first, and I was mind-boggled. But then, that’s Tony.”
“That’s why we love him,” Ren agreed.
“Yep.” Seth smiled, and there was a quiet happiness to him, one that had only seemed to grow as Ren had supported him and they’d become closer, after Dave’s accident.
Maybe they really didn’t need to figure their shit out.
Maybe they already had.
Ren leaned in closer. “You were great,” he said simply.
He wanted to say it, because it was true, and also because even though so many people depended on Seth—both before, when he’d been the team leader, and now, when he helped run their business—he didn’t think anyone told him enough that he was great.
Because he was, and because he deserved to hear it about a thousand times a day.
“Yeah?” The corner of Seth’s mouth quirked up.
Ren couldn’t help but think of what he had before; that he’d been asking to be really, thoroughly kissed.
Just the thought of it made him shiver a little.
“We should sneak out now, before Tony and Jonas collide,” Ren said in a low voice. “Sneak out and head back to my place. Or your place. Or any place.”
“Any place, huh?” Seth leaned in closer. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you want me . . . bad.”
Ren had been playing it cool forever. He knew he was good at it.
But here he was, stopping a breath away from Seth’s lips, heartbeat racing out of control, cock already growing hard, just thinking about everything they could do if they were alone together, with no way on earth he could possibly resist Seth’s magnetic pull one second longer.
But it was Seth who closed the gap between them, covering Ren’s mouth with his own, and the kiss was hot and it was also sweet.
It reminded Ren of that first kiss, the one that he’d always expected to be so passionate and fiery, but instead had been soft.
Meaningful.
He pulled away, even though it nearly killed him. “Come on,” he said, reaching down and tugging at Seth’s arm. “Let’s get out of here. I think this guy’s gonna be around for a long time, and we can always chat him up later.”
Seth grinned. “You think so?”
“There was a point,” Ren said, downing the rest of his drink, and standing up, “when I would have fucking sold tickets to Tony meeting Jonas Anderson. Now . . .”
“Now?” Seth prompted.
Ren knew what he wanted to say. Now I just want you. But that seemed monumental. The antithesis of any kind of casual thing.
The sort of phrase that would prompt a discussion where they “figured it out,” at least according to Ross, anyway.
He wasn’t proud of it, but he was a little scared.
This was new territory for him.
So instead of answering, he leaned in again and answered Seth’s question and finished his own thought with a kiss that left nothing to the imagination.
On the way back to Seth’s place, Ren had formulated a plan.
It was not a very complex plan, mostly because it felt like half his blood wasn’t currently residing in his brain—but then it didn’t need any real complexity.
The plan was simple: give Seth a little of the time and attention and pleasure that he seemed so determined to give Ren every single time they had sex.
They might not have hooked up all that many times, but Ren could already see a pattern developing, and he didn’t like it.
Well, he liked it. In fact, he loved it.
But there was an inherent selfishness Ren couldn’t live with.
Besides, he enjoyed giving. And he wanted to give everything to Seth.
That thought was at the forefront of Ren’s mind all the way up to Seth unlocking the front door, but the moment they were inside, Seth crowded him against the door, kissing his mouth, his neck, anywhere he could reach.
Ren’s head hit the back of the door, losing himself in the feel of Seth pressed against him, around him.
It felt so goddamn good, it was almost easy to just loose himself to the sensations. Which was what had happened every other time they’d had sex.
The thought was like a bucketful of cold water dumped on his head.
Ren gasped—and not in the good way—and wrenched his head away.
“What’s wrong?” Seth said, pulling back, a concerned expression blooming across his handsome features.
“Nothing is . . . wrong,” Ren said, and while he spoke, he maneuvered Seth’s body until it was the one pressed against the door. “I just want to try something.”
But Seth’s concern was morphing into apprehension.
“Try what?” he asked.
It was easy to forget that this was a man who didn’t relinquish control easily. He had admitted it himself to Ren not ten feet away from where they stood right now.
Maybe that was the only way he could have sex. The only way he wanted to have sex.
Ren could adjust to that, but he wasn’t going to let it go without talking it over first. “You always do this,” Ren said, pinning Seth’s body with his own.
Feeling the arousal bloom under his skin as his hips met Seth’s hips, their chests pressed together.
“Always overwhelm me, always take over, the moment we start to kiss.”
“You don’t like it.” Seth sounded incredulous, which made sense.
Who wouldn’t like a guy who lavished attention on your body until you felt like you were being blown apart by how fucking fantastic it was?
“I do like it,” Ren admitted. He wasn’t going to lie. “But I like you. I want to make you feel good, too.”
There was a stubborn tilt to Seth’s chin. “Making you feel good makes me feel good,” he said.
“And the opposite is true, too,” Ren said. “I want to give that back to you.”
This time it was Seth’s eyes that slid away.
But Ren wasn’t going to accept that. He took Seth’s chin with a firm, but gentle grip and pulled it back, so Seth didn’t have a choice but to look at him.
“Don’t do that,” he said. Begged more like.
“Is this about the control thing? Do you need to be in the driver’s seat in bed?
Is that what this is? Because we can do that. ”
“No,” Seth said, and his breath was coming harder and faster. Ren could feel it against his face. “No, that’s not it.”
“Then what is it?”
“You’ve done this lots of times . . .” Seth trailed away.
“Yes.” It was stupid to assume that even though Seth hadn’t been jealous, this would never come up again. Yet Ren had begun to assume that it wouldn’t. That Seth didn’t give a shit.
“I don’t care, not the way you think,” he said. “I want . . . I want to be more to you than just a guy you remember you slept with.”
“You’re already more than that,” Ren admitted wryly, tipping his head against Seth’s. Feeling his warm gray gaze deep down in his gut. It shouldn’t have been so easy to admit, but then none of this had gone the way Ren had expected. “You know that.”
“It’s stupid,” Seth muttered. “I’m stupid.”
“No, you’re not stupid.”
He was the opposite in fact.
A thought dawned on Ren as he considered what Seth had said—and what he hadn’t. “Were you trying to make sure I felt so good that I stuck around? You wanted the sex to be really good.”
“Of course I wanted it to be good,” Seth said, and maybe Ren wouldn’t have noticed the bluster in his words if he wasn’t usually so completely laid-back and authentic.
“You were afraid I’d get bored,” Ren challenged.
“Not . . . bored, per se,” Seth admitted.
Ren stared at him, thinking. He should have guessed it was something like this, but then Seth had told him about the control he was used to having, the control he still struggled with not having, and Ren had begun to wonder if that need had extended to the bedroom.
But it didn’t.
Seth had been giving him a banquet of pleasure every night because he’d been afraid that Ren wouldn’t stick around if he didn’t.
He’d known, deep down, that Seth had feelings. That those feelings made Seth vulnerable, but he’d never imagined what it would be like to hold someone’s heart in your hands.
While he’d never been letting anyone close enough to touch his own heart, Ren had never gotten close enough to feel anyone else’s either.
But he could feel Seth’s now.
Beating hard and strong against his own.
He reached between them, pressing a palm against it. Feeling it. Understanding what it really meant for the first time.
“I’m not going to get bored,” Ren said bluntly.
“I’m definitely nowhere near bored.” He angled his hips so that Seth could feel how hard he was in his jeans.
“I’m just as desperate for you now as I was before we had sex.
Maybe more. No . . .” It was hard to be honest, but Seth’s honesty deserved his own in return.
“No, definitely more. I want you more now, so much more, than I did before. And, what I want tonight is to make you feel good.”
Seth bit his bottom lip, and Ren wanted to be those teeth.
“Will you let me do that?” Ren asked.
“A man would be crazy to say no . . . so . . . yes . . .” Seth trailed off, but before he could speak again, Ren kissed him.
This was more what he’d expected their first kiss would be: all lush, hot passion, his tongue in Seth’s mouth, his hands touching every part of him that he could reach, fingers trailing down his chest, and ending right above the fly of his jeans.
Seth’s whole body twitched, like he could compel Ren to touch him where he needed it most. But Ren had finally gotten the ability to do what he’d been dreaming about for six long months, that he’d only gotten little brief tastes of so far, and he had every intention of gorging.