55. Maeve
MAEVE
I’m standing in the bedroom later in the day, debating my options as the dinner hour draws closer and closer, wondering if I should go downstairs or if it’s better to just stay hidden up here.
Before I can make a decision, a quiet knock interrupts my thoughts. Ford pokes his head in, his expression careful. “Hey. You hungry?”
The question sounds so normal, so everyday, that for a moment I almost forget everything that’s happened. But the way he’s looking at me, like he’s not sure what my reaction will be, brings it all flooding back.
“I could eat,” I say. There’s an awkward beat of silence that never used to exist between us, and then he clears his throat and nods.
“Okay, good. Because George and the rest of the Silver Start board have flown down. They want to have dinner with us tonight.”
“Are you serious?” I stand up quickly, my pulse jumping. After everything that’s happened today, they still want to meet? “Why?”
“I guess they’ve made some inquiries and my reputation is better than Liam’s, but they want to meet us all in person, just the four of us, before moving forward. Not at a Christmas party where there’ll be other people, so that we can… make sure we’re all properly on the same page.”
My stomach flips uncomfortably. I feel sweaty and nervous already. “I’m glad that they’ve seen Liam isn’t someone worth listening to,” I say weakly.
Ford shifts in the doorway, not quite coming into the room. “Are you… do you feel up for this? I know today has been?—”
“I’m fine. “ I cut him off, although we both know it’s not true. “This is what I’m being paid for, right?”
Something flickers across his face at that. “Maeve?—”
“I should get ready,” I say, turning away before he can finish whatever he was going to say. “I don’t want to keep important people waiting.”
“I’ll let you get ready,” Ford says after a pause, then closes the door.
I take my time, putting on the first dress that Gabriel gave me and doing my hair up in as sophisticated a style as I can manage. I don’t wear any jewelry except my engagement ring, although I do put on the embroidered shoes that Hayden gave me, so that I’m wearing one thing from each of the men.
It helps me feel that wonderful sense of wholeness that I felt last night, even if I know now more than ever how it’s just an illusion. It’ll be the last time I get to feel this way, and I want to do it right.
George seems like someone who appreciates a simple, elegant, conservative look, and I think this dress with its classic style, and my hair up off my neck, and minimal jewelry, will do nicely.
Doing my makeup is the difficult part. Not because of the application—I keep it very simple, so I look smooth and fresh-faced.
It’s the looking at myself in the mirror that’s hard to handle.
Every time I make eye contact with myself I feel sick and like I want to cry, and I can’t look blotchy in front of all these important people at a fancy restaurant.
In spite of everything, I think I end up looking pretty nice. I test out a smile in the mirror, but it doesn’t feel right—too forced, too brittle.
If I get through this night, it’ll be a miracle.
I head down the stairs to meet the men, but the moment I get to the end of the hallway, I run into Liam coming up the stairs.
“Maeve,” he blurts out. Then, to my complete shock, he smiles. “I was hoping to find you.”
I didn’t know he was back at the house. I stare up at him warily. “You were coming to apologize?”
Liam actually scoffs. “Maeve, baby?—”
“I’m not your baby.”
“I did you a favor. Ford used you. He tried to use you so he could lie his way into that deal. He and his buddies were just treating you like a toy. I’ve taken care of all that.”
I stare at him for a moment, at a loss for words. It’s truly mind-boggling to me how he seems to be divorced from reality. How he’s developed the completely wrong ideas about everything.
This man didn’t appreciate me when he had me, and it seems he’s incapable of recognizing when I’m actually enjoying myself and being treated well, even when it’s right in front of his face.
He lives in some kind of alternate universe where none of my issues with our past relationship matter, and where instead of ruining my life, this is some kind of big romantic gesture.
“You insulted me in front of your parents,” I point out, seizing on the first thing that springs to mind.
“You called me a whore. You told them I was being passed around by their son and his two best friends. You think after that they’ll accept me in any way?
That they’ll be happy I’m your girlfriend?
I’m asking you this seriously because I don’t know what other possible answer there could be—are you insane? ”
Liam stares at me like I’m the insane one. “My parents will be fine.”
The thing is, I think he really believes that. Because his parents have let him get away with everything his entire life. They’ve spoiled him. It makes sense that in his mind he’d think it was all going to be okay, because it’s always been okay for him in the past.
I take a deep breath. “Liam, I don’t know how I could’ve been any clearer at the ballet, but let me say this again.
My not being with you has nothing to do with Ford, or Hayden, or Gabriel.
The three of them could disappear off the face of the earth right now, and I still wouldn’t want to be with you.
Because it’s not that I want to be with them instead. ”
Although, I do want that.
“It’s that I am never going to be with you again.
You took me for granted, disrespected me, talked down to me, mocked me, and cheated on me.
And your behavior now proves that you haven’t actually grown or changed at all.
You just blew up my entire life and made me look like a cheap slut in front of your entire family.
You ruined your brother’s business deal.
And even if I was being taken advantage of by them—and I wasn’t—I wouldn’t want you ruining their deal and interfering.
It’s not your place. It’s not protective or chivalrous.
It’s petty, cruel, and a complete temper tantrum.
You’re a piece of shit, and I wouldn’t go back to you if you were the last man on earth. ”
Liam’s jaw drops. “Maeve—I?—”
“I don’t want to hear it,” I cut him off firmly. “I’m done with you, forever.”
I storm down the stairs, letting my righteous anger carry me the rest of the way. At least it helps me not think about going to dinner with these three men and what it will entail— whether I look good enough, whether they’ll be pleased with my performance.
Hayden, Gabriel, and Ford are standing by the front door in the foyer, waiting for me. They’re all wearing black suits, and while black tie is traditional and appropriate for a dinner like this, I can’t help but feel it makes them look like they’re in mourning.
That’s silly. The only person in mourning here is me.
But they are clearly still upset about everything.
Hayden leans in to say something but I quickly brush past him, not letting him finish.
I don’t know what he’s going to say—I’m sure it’s something sweet—but I know that if I hear him right now I’ll cry. I’m hanging on by a thread.
“Let’s go,” I say, grabbing my coat and purse. The purse that they bought me. Wearing the clothes they bought me. I feel sick. “Let’s get this over with.”
Hayden’s face goes tight. Ford and Gabriel exchange a concerned glance.
I continue to push past them out through the front door, and we get into the cars to head to the restaurant.
We have a nice long table in the middle of the elegant space, and it looks like there will be ten of us. Myself, the three men, plus George and the other people from Silver Start. When everyone arrives, it turns out to be four additional people, since two of the men brought their wives.
Ford and Hayden keep mostly quiet, allowing Gabriel to put on a smile and be his charming self.
Luckily Ford is usually a bit reserved anyway, so his silence doesn’t seem out of character.
I loop my arm through his and let my engagement ring be clearly visible.
Whatever else happens, we’re going to put on a good show.
We all sit down and the server takes our orders. It’s a nice Italian restaurant in Denver and I’m briefly grateful that Italian is such comforting food—I know I’ll like just about anything on the menu. It means I don’t have to think too hard about choosing.
“Thank you all for coming,” Ford says as the sommelier pours the wine. “You really didn’t have to make the trip down here in person.”
“We believe in a personal touch here at Silver Start,” George says importantly. “I thought it best that I fly down here and look you all in the eye. I’m an old-fashioned man that way.”
“You’re clearly old-fashioned in many ways,” Gabriel says. His usual charming tone is firmly in place, but I know him well enough to know that he’s secretly insulting the man.
“Thank you, thank you.” George chuckles, missing the subtle dig. “Can’t help the way I’m made!”
I can’t help loving these three men , I want to say. How is that any different?
George looks over at me with obvious appraisal. “I must say, you are a lovely woman. I can understand why Ford was so drawn to you.”
“Thank you, sir. I’ve been told I clean up nice,” I joke lightly. “And I’m so sorry that Liam caused such problems for everyone.”
“My brother is… not very successful in life,” Ford explains diplomatically.
“And he cheated on Maeve back when they were together. It’s actually how we got together.
I had no idea that Liam had cheated on her, but I knew that things had ended and she was in a difficult place, so I offered her a job. ”
“I didn’t want to speak badly about his brother to him,” I say, because that’s true. I didn’t.
“Even though he had wronged you?” George asks with old-fashioned concern.
What an antiquated way to put that. “I didn’t think at the time that Ford would believe me.
I didn’t know him very well personally. And I didn’t see the point in causing friction in the family.
There was no point to it. I don’t ever want to be petty.
But then Ford and I got together and… I couldn’t keep it from him. I needed him to know the truth.”
“We kept our relationship private since she was still working for us,” Ford adds.
“I’m also a very private person in general.
I don’t think it’s anyone’s business what goes on in my personal life.
But when we got engaged, we knew that it would get out eventually, and my family deserves to know. Liam took it very badly.”
“He kept trying to get me to date him again,” I say, and I can’t keep the genuine horror and upset from my voice. “It’s been… very upsetting.”
Ford puts his hand over mine and squeezes gently. I can see Hayden and Gabriel shooting me sympathetic looks across the table.
“I should’ve punched him even harder,” Ford mutters under his breath.
I smile at him gratefully. “I’m fine, really.”
“I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with such unpleasantness,” George says with what seems like genuine sympathy.
“Well, we can’t always choose our family,” I point out diplomatically.
“Very true,” one of the other Silver Start executives mutters darkly, and I wince in sympathy at whatever family drama he’s thinking about.
“I’m so glad that we could clear this all up,” George says jovially. “So, just to confirm—you are with Ford?”
“Yes.” Not really, but I say it firmly.
“And only with him?”
“I feel… it’s a bit insulting to ask her this,” Hayden says, clearly restraining himself from saying more. “We’re happy to bring in as many character witnesses as you need to prove what kind of person Liam is. I don’t think anything he told you should have to be defended or disproved.”
“I would still like to hear her say it,” George says stubbornly.
I sigh internally. I’m used to dealing with men like this from my work as an executive assistant—men who simply want things the way they want them, and don’t care for things like logic or common sense.
“How do you know I’m not lying to you right now?” I tease him lightly. “Seems to me this is a big game of he said, she said. But if you want to hear it, I’m happy to tell you. I’m only with Ford, and nothing that Liam said is true.”
George smiles with satisfaction. “I’m glad this is all settled then.”
I nod tightly.
The food arrives and for a moment I’m occupied with it, but then George keeps talking.
“You must understand that we have to be very conscious who we get into bed with—if you’ll pardon the phrase.
Silver Start has been known from its inception as a bastion of principle and morality, in our environmental work, and all the way down to our personal standards. ”
Wow. I can’t believe how pretentious this guy is .
I want to look at Ford and the others and ask them why they’re working so hard to partner with someone like this. There have to be other companies they can work with instead—people who won’t be so insufferably sanctimonious.
Ford, Hayden, and Gabriel are all quiet as George continues to pontificate, but I can see all three of them getting more and more tense.
I just try to focus on eating. I’m sure the food here is lovely, but for the first time in who knows how long, I can’t taste it, can’t focus on it.
I’m too tense even for food, which is saying something.
A few of the other Silver Start people murmur agreement along the way, but it’s clear that George likes the sound of his own voice and is used to commanding any room he’s in.
There’s a brief pause as George finally sips at his wine, and it seems that was the moment all three men were waiting for, because they all burst out talking at once.
“No, sorry—” Ford says, at the same time Gabriel mutters, “I can’t do this,” and Hayden says, “This isn’t going to work.”
I blink at them, unsure of what they could possibly mean. George doesn’t seem to know either.
“I’m sorry?” he says, like he must have hallucinated the last thirty seconds.
Ford turns to me, his expression intense. “We can’t keep doing this. It’s all wrong.”
“What are you doing?” I hiss at him under my breath. I have no idea where this is going. Is he seriously sabotaging everything right at the finish line?
“Having my ring on your finger doesn’t feel right,” Ford continues, and the bottom drops out of my stomach. “I can’t go through with this.”
I have no idea what this means. Is he worried that just being associated with me, even if the situation with Liam is cleared up, will cast a shadow over his deal with Silver Start? Does he think the charade is ridiculous and he’s going to reveal that the engagement is fake?
“You shouldn’t have just my ring on your finger,” Ford continues, and my heart trips over itself. “Because I don’t think I’m the only one who’s fallen in love with you.”