13
Xavier
I see Lina standing next to Carl. Both of them are looking straight ahead at the ocean. The waves come crashing down inches from her feet. I wonder what they’re saying.
I know I shouldn’t have sunk so low earlier, I’m not sure why I did. If I’m being honest, I was still heated from seeing that fucking loser touch her. I wish I could’ve beat the shit out of him for touching her. How the hell am I going to be able to let her go after this? Knowing what disgusting men are out there? Fear and anxiety fill the pit of my stomach as I continue to watch her and Carl from afar.
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“Nothing yet, sir,” Carl says as the three of us now sit on the balcony of our suite. My eyes bounce over to Lina. She hasn’t spoken to me since my snarky comment this afternoon. The sun begins to set over the horizon and I wish I could enjoy this stunning view with her right now, but I can’t.
I want to apologize to her, but we haven’t been alone since. She and Carl walked the beach for an hour as I gave her the space she asked for.
“I’ll call if I hear anything sir,” Carl stands and makes his way back inside our room. I leave Lina alone on the balcony and follow Carl inside.
“She told me what you said,” Carl says, raising his eyebrows.
“You need to be gentle with her, Xavier,” Carl says, which catches me off guard. “She’s very fragile right now and she’s been through a lot,” he shoots me a sympathetic smile. I close my eyes as I pinch the bridge of my nose.
“I know she has,” I sigh. I watch Carl disappear out the door and I make my way back towards the balcony.
“Hi,” I say standing in the middle of the sliding glass door.
“Hi,” she says, pulling up the blanket to her chest.
“May I?” I ask, pointing to the empty spot on the sofa next to her. She nods. My heart flutters as I make my way next to her. Nerves begin to take me over as I sit down. Why am I so nervous to apologize? I sit there for a moment trying to muster up the courage to say something.
“I’m so sorry, Lina. I shouldn’t have—” I pause as I take her hand in mine. Our gaze holds and I notice her eyes slowly glisten with emotion. I swallow hard because that’s the last thing I ever wanted to do to her. I never wanted to hurt the woman I saved.
“I should have never said that, it was low and immature. I know you can handle yourself. I’ve seen you do it. I’m sorry.” I hold her gaze, waiting for her to say something.
“Forgiven,” she says, giving my hand a gentle squeeze. She rests her head on my shoulder as the waves continue to crash below us. The sun eventually melts into the horizon and the moon peeks its way through the darkness. We both sit there saying nothing. Various emotions rush through my body as I feel her head rest on me.
“You know we should be celebrating,” I change the tone of my voice.
“What do you mean?”
“We should be celebrating that you are pretty damn close to getting back to your old life. Pretty damn close to seeing your mom and your family. Your friends—” I swallow hard as I see a smile begin to appear on her face.
“Let's get out of here,” I stand and reach my hand out to her. She looks up at me and takes it.
“Let me change,” she smiles as my hand entwines with hers.
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An hour later, Lina walks out of the bathroom. Our gaze meets almost instantly. My eyes break from hers and slowly drop down her body. She’s wearing a black strapless dress that conforms to her curves. Her dark hair is longer now that it’s straight. Her heels clank against the marble floors as she makes her way over to me. Fuck.
“Ready?” she asks, grabbing a small clutch on the nightstand. Does she seriously not know how fucking stunning she looks right now? I swallow hard as I try to play it cool.
“After you,” I open the door for her. Carl follows from a distance as we make our way through the lobby. Everyone's eyes are fixed on Lina Harrington as she walks through the corridor. Her heels clank sexily against the bright-white marble floors as she confidently makes her way towards the restaurant.
“Reservation for Almasi.” She tells the hostess as we approach her. I’m not sure where this confidence came from, but it’s hot as hell. “Right this way, ma’am.” The young lady leads us down another secluded hallway away from the rest of the restaurant.
“I hope this will do.” The hostess says as she places the menus on the table. Lina looks around in amazement as wine bottles surround us. It’s beautiful.
“Thank you,” she says as I push her chair in. I watch as her eyes look up at the wine bottles that are shelved from the ground up.
“Well, I hope there isn’t an earthquake. We would be done-zo,” she laughs as she opens the menu. The waiter quickly comes in and double-takes Lina as he pulls out his notepad.
“What can I get started for you?” he asks, looking at me.
“We’ll have the 2008 Dom Pérignon for starters. And for the entree the both of us will have the salmon,” I say, handing the menu back. Lina’s eyes hold mine. I’m not sure if she’s impressed or annoyed that I just ordered for both of us.
“And for dessert, we’ll both have the crème br?lée. Thank you,” she smiles past me and at the waiter. A slight grin forms on my face as I watch the waiter leave the room.
“I don’t do dessert,” I say as her eyes hold mine.
“And I don’t do salmon.”
“But it pairs great with the wine,” I snap back.
“And the dessert pairs great with me.” She leans back in her chair. Silence falls between us as she crosses her legs holding my stare. A throbbing begins to intensify between my legs. What the hell did she just say? My heart beats hard against my chest.
“I’m not going to sugar-coat it, Xavier. I know that life is short. After everything that has happened, I see that clear as day now. I’m not going to sit here and pretend that I don’t want you inside of me. I won't pretend I haven't thought about it since we kissed. But, the truth is I do. I’ve never wanted anyone more. And I’m not going to even try to explain it because it doesn’t make sense. But, I guess that’s life sometimes right?” She says holding my stare.
“Right.” I swallow hard.
I feel all the blood rush in between my legs as I stare at her. She’s the most beautiful woman I think I have ever seen. But it’s not just her beauty on the outside that has me so wrapped around her perfect dainty little fingers. It’s how she can read my mind without me saying a word. She feels everything I do as well. It’s how she can relate to the depths of life not many have encountered. She’s a lotus and I’m seeing first-hand—right before my very eyes, how they rise from the mud.
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Xavier and I laugh as we make our way back towards our room. I don’t know who this new Lina Harrington thinks she is, but I freaking love her. She’s confident. She knows what she wants and she’s not afraid.
I feel Xavier’s hand lower to my back as we continue to walk next to each other. Goosebumps fill my skin as I smile over at him. I can’t explain why I feel so comfortable with him, but I do. He has this hard exterior, but once you get past that, he’s soft and warm despite having a gut-wrenching past. Like me I guess. We get each other because of that, because of all the painful things that have happened to us.
“Thank you, Carl.” Xavier nods his head towards Carl and he disappears towards his room. My heart flutters as I try to hold back a smile. Years and years of waiting and it’s led me here, to this moment. We stop on the outside of our door.
“Are you sure?”
“More than sure,” I say as I step forward to kiss him. I feel him slowly run his finger down my neck. He grips my face with his large hands as our kiss deepens. Our tongues wrestle around valiantly as we stay frozen in this moment. His hands graze down my back and over my curves. I feel his lips brush my neck as his hand makes its way over my sex. My entire body melts as he caresses me slowly. “Ah,” I moan as he grips my face firmly. Anyone could walk down the hall at any moment and see us. I don’t care though, I’ve never been so caught up in a moment, I never wanted something as badly as I want this. Him . I run my hand over his erection and smile.
Within seconds he swings open our door and pulls me playfully into our room. As the door shuts he presses me up against the wall. I feel his finger slide over my cheek and down to my chin slowly. My body becomes hot as it eagerly awaits for more. Our eyes continue to hold as my heart pounds rapidly.
He steps back as he takes his shirt off then throws it over the sofa. I stare at his perfect body, his chiseled and broad chest, the dark specks of chest hair that scatter over his abdominal muscles. I swallow hard as he begins to make his way towards me. I run my hand down his muscular abs then over his pronounced erection. My breath catches. He’s huge.
Before another thought crowds my already nervous and anxious mind, he takes my face in his hands and swipes his tongue between my lips. We make our way over towards the bed and he steps closer. I watch as he slides my dress down and throws it onto the floor. He stands at the foot of the bed as his eyes take in my naked body. I stand there with my heart pounding hard against my chest.
“You’re beautiful,” he says standing in front of me. I grin as I back onto the bed slowly. I feel the bed dip down as he makes his way on top of me. His light-brown eyes stare deep into mine. I can’t tell what he’s thinking or what he’s feeling, but this feeling that runs between us right now is indescribable. It’s not love. Definitely not love, but it’s something—and I’m holding onto it.
Before I know it our bare bodies are panting hard under the thin-white sheets. I feel his warm breath against my face. His erection is up against my stomach as his fingers explore every inch of my body. He’s not rushing this, he’s taking his time. His lips caress every inch of my body as my mouth slowly curves into a smile. I feel his tongue circle over my erect nipples and I close my eyes and moan. He knows what he’s doing. He knows good-and-well. He’s making me wait. Maybe he’s giving me time to change my mind. But I won’t. Not about this.
I spread my legs letting him know I’m ready. Our gaze holds again. He kisses me softly before I feel him inside me. I cry out loudly as I feel myself stretch around him. My fingers dig into his back as he thrusts in deeper, slowly making his way further in. I can’t explain the feeling that takes me over. It feels like another version of me has just been discovered. But how? Maybe she’s been there all along and now she’s finally free.
I lift my hips trying to match his thrusting motions. And I do. Our bodies glide perfectly in sync, entangled together under the sheets as the waves outside crash loudly. I couldn’t tell you if there was a storm or hurricane going on outside because I’m too caught up in the moment. He picks up pace and my fingers dig into the mattress. The grunting that comes from him as he thrusts sends me over the edge and I explode all around him. I close my eyes as my head falls back onto the pillow.
My body feels weightless as ecstasy rushes through my veins. Parts of me I didn’t even know existed pulsate hard as satisfaction fills me. He lifts my hips up and thrusts deeper and harder into me. I feel my breasts rocking all over as I see the muscles in his chest flex from holding me up. He begins to lose all control. “Harder,” I demand. His eyes quickly shoot into mine and he gives me a smirk before he thrusts hard and deep. I feel every ridge of him slide in and out of me, then I feel him orgasm hard.
His body topples over next to me as his hand searches for mine. He trails his finger over the top of my hand as his eyes stay closed.
I smile at him before my fingers run through his dark locks. Our sweaty bodies lay next to each other.
Peace overcomes me as I lay there with him. No second-thoughts. No regret. Only peace and the longing for more.
“Again.” I smile.