Chapter 23 Dina
Dina
Nine years ago
I have my eye on the ball, and I’m ready to take it from my opponent. I weave around some of the other players, feeling the rush of wind around me with every step. I step forward, my foot angled towards the ball, about to manoeuvre it right towards me.
And then suddenly I’m falling face first on the ground, and there’s a searing pain running up my leg and all I see is red, red, red.
‘Dina, Dina, are you OK?’ Jen’s face is suddenly in front of mine, concern etched on it.
‘I’m, I’m …’ I look down at my leg. It’s bent a different way than it should be, and I can feel the ache, throbbing and burning. I close my eyes and shake my head. ‘Shit. I don’t think so.’
‘OK, come on, let’s get you to the school nurse.’ Jen waves over Baba, who is on the touchline as he always is. He rushes over, his panic clear, and Maya appears right beside him, a twin expression on her face.
Jen and Baba put their arms around me and I try to balance myself with their help while trying my hardest to work through the pain that seems to be getting worse and worse with every passing second.
They help me all the way to the nurse’s office, where they sit me down on the bed. Maya must have silently followed behind because she hovers in the doorway.
‘What happened?’ Nurse Gail asks, looking from me to Jen to Baba to Maya.
‘Just an accident during football practice,’ Jen says.
She offers me a smile like she’s trying to tell me that it’s no big deal.
But we both know it’s a big deal. Next week, the under-18s league have organised for a scout from a professional team to watch us play.
It’s the last match of the season and Jen told me that the scouts were specifically interested in me, and that I could have a chance at a real team if I played well.
And now, I’ve somehow injured myself while practising for the school team.
Nurse Gail pulls up a chair near me and examines my leg carefully, but every time she touches me, a fresh wave of pain goes through me. I try not to wince, but it’s difficult.
‘Is she going to be OK?’ Maya asks. She’s hovering close to me, looking like she wants to reach out and soothe me, but she doesn’t.
‘She’ll be fine,’ Gail says. ‘It’s better than it looks, you’re lucky.’
I certainly don’t feel lucky with this excruciating pain. ‘So, I’ll be fine to play next week?’
Gail’s expression drops. ‘Next week? No, honey, you’ll take a little longer than that to recover. It’s a sprain; you’ll need crutches for at least two weeks, probably three.’
‘But I have an important match next week. I have to play,’ I say, as if Nurse Gail can somehow magically heal my leg. I look to Baba, expecting him to say something about how I have to play too, but he just gives me an encouraging smile.
‘Dina, you need to recover. That’s more important than a match,’ he says.
‘But—’
Maya rests a hand on my shoulder, and I cut myself off. When I look at her, the deep brown of her eyes makes me feel a little calmer. She has a way of making me feel more at ease, less angry. Which is ironic considering she had been the source of my anger for so many years.
‘Let’s make sure you’re OK. That’s the most important thing right now. We can worry about the other stuff later.’
I want to worry about that stuff now, I want to make sure that I’m not going to miss my chance at my dream because of a stupid sprain. But I know that Maya is right. I’m not going to get anywhere by trying to argue my case in the nurse’s office while wincing in pain.
‘OK, yeah.’ I sigh.
I’m on bedrest for the rest of the week, and I take it seriously.
I’m hoping that if I don’t use my bad leg at all, I’ll be well enough to play by match time.
But the game is approaching fast, and my leg isn’t much better.
It still hurts to put any pressure on it.
No matter how much I wish for some kind of a miracle, there’s no way that I can play, I know that.
‘Jen said she told the scouts that you weren’t playing,’ Maya tells me when she comes over to visit me the day before the match.
I try not to be hurt by this – it’s what Jen should have done as soon as I was injured.
She’d postponed because I’d asked her to, probably knowing full well that there was no way that I was going to be able to play.
‘I guess that’s it then.’
Maya frowns at the dejection on my face.
‘Hey, it’ll be OK. I bet Jen can reschedule and they’ll come and see you play another match.
This isn’t your only chance, I promise.’ Maya obviously can’t promise because she doesn’t know what’s going to happen.
This feels like my only chance, especially since I rarely ever get chances anyway.
But football has been like a lifeline from the beginning – something that could maybe change things for me.
And this opportunity has felt like a start.
Finally, a chance to prove myself, to try to achieve my dreams.
I should have expected that everything would come crashing down.
‘Yeah, maybe,’ I say.
Maya scoots closer to me from the end of the bed where she has been sitting. She brushes my hair away from my face, and even though it does nothing in reality, it calms me down a little. At least, no matter what happens, I have Maya here with me.
‘Look, you don’t even know what was going to happen with these scouts.
I know you’re sad about missing this opportunity, but there will be others,’ Maya says.
‘And you’re like the best football player ever.
Trust me, someone is going to scoop you up before long, and then the only place I’ll ever see you is on my TV screen, killing it on the football pitch. ’
I smile at Maya’s faith in me. ‘Please, you’ll see me on that pitch when we’re on competing teams.’
Maya’s smile widens. ‘Yeah, and I guess I’ll have to beat you. Maybe I’ll take pity on you and let you score a goal.’
I roll my eyes. It sounds silly to say it aloud, but I can almost imagine that life. Me and Maya both making it onto professional teams. We’d be like a football power couple.
I lean forward and plant a kiss on her lips, and she smiles against me for a moment.
‘Thanks, Maya,’ I say. ‘You’re right. There’ll be more opportunities. For both of us.’
‘I told you we’d be late,’ I grumble to Deen as he turns the car into the car park. We’ve already missed half the match, thanks to my brother.
‘Hey, I’m doing you a favour by driving you. You shouldn’t even be here,’ Deen says.
Technically, I’m still supposed to be on bedrest, but I didn’t want to miss the match. The least I could do is come out here and support the team, and Maya. Especially when Maya has been making sure I’ve been taken care of since I got injured – both emotionally and physically.
‘Just find a parking spot!’ I say, not wanting to be any later than we already are.
Deen rolls his eyes, but quickly parks the car, before opening my door with my crutches in his hands.
I take them when he offers them to me, and it takes a second for me to find my balance.
I haven’t had to use them much since I’ve mostly been in bed for the past week and so I’m still getting used to them.
‘You need some help?’ Deen asks, raising an eyebrow.
‘I’m fine,’ I say, hobbling towards the football pitch.
I hear Deen sigh behind me as he starts to follow. I know that he would rather be hanging out with his friends today, so I appreciate that he actually agreed to drive me here. With Ma at work, and Baba busy with the restaurant, he was my only choice.
The match is in full swing and I spot Maya on the pitch. She is laser-focused, and I know that she probably won’t even notice me until the match is over and she doesn’t have tunnel vision anymore.
‘Dina.’ Jen notices me from her position on the touchline. She comes over, frowning. ‘What are you doing here? How’s your leg?’
I’m sure Maya’s been giving her daily updates about me.
‘It’s OK, a little better,’ I say. ‘I thought that I’d come and support the team.’
‘You should really be at home, getting some rest,’ Jen says.
‘But it’s the last game of the season,’ I reply.
‘Well, take it easy,’ Jen says. She’s about to turn back towards the match, but I stop her.
‘I’m sorry you had to cancel with the scouts,’ I say. ‘I know it wasn’t easy to arrange them coming.’
Jen gives me a flickering smile. ‘You have nothing to be sorry about. And, actually, I did tell them that you wouldn’t be playing, but they still wanted to check out the match. They want to see what the team is capable of.’
‘Oh.’
‘Yeah, and they’re really impressed with the team, actually,’ Jen says. She doesn’t quite meet my eyes as she says this.
‘It’s a good team,’ I reply, a sense of dread building in my stomach. What is Jen not telling me?
‘They’ve offered the spot on their team to someone else,’ Jen explains.
The feeling in my stomach grows and I can feel the pinprick of tears behind my eyes, even though it’s silly.
I shouldn’t be upset that someone else on the team got this great opportunity.
It’s just that if I was here, if I had played, I would be the one they would be offering that spot to. I just know it.
‘Who did they offer it to?’ I try to keep my voice steady as I ask. And before Jen says her name, I already know from the guilty look in her eyes.
‘Maya,’ Jen says. ‘And don’t worry, Dina, there are other teams and other scouts. Even though this is the last match of the season, I’m sure that we can …’
Jen keeps talking, but her voice drowns out for me. All I can hear is the rush of blood in my ears, all I can feel is the well of tears building behind my eyes. I look from Jen to Maya’s distant form, through a blurry vision.
How could she have dreamed with me about my future just yesterday and then turned around and betrayed me like this? How could she have told me all about these opportunities that I would supposedly have, and then taken mine right from under me?
‘Dina? Are you OK?’ Jen’s voice finally grounds me back in reality.