CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
It was the following Wednesday night and I was in a black hole and not even trying to clamber out of it. I just didn’t have the energy.
I heaved myself off the sofa to top up my wine glass and grab a family-size bag of crisps from the cupboard.
A famous saying flashed through my mind.
When life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade .
Ha! What about this for a variation?
When life gives you lemons, get yourself a catapult!
Not that I would be pinging any lemons at anyone in the near future. Well, except maybe at Caleb and Loretta.
The day had started out so well, too...
*****
I’d been in a cheerful mood, setting off on the cake run – mainly because after my deep chat about love and life with Mo the week before, a plan had formed in my mind and I was now keen to carry it out.
That was all going to happen at Lockley Meadow farmers’ market, but before that, I was heading for my first stop of the day. Henley Green.
Mo was waiting as I pulled into my usual spot, right by the green, and she was beaming from ear to ear because Gaz was there with her. He had his arm tightly around her so I knew talking had taken place, and as they left with their bag of jam doughnuts, Mo turned and mouthed thank you and winked at me.
I smiled to myself.
Mo was happily back with Gaz. And hopefully this time, she might stay that way. I took it as a good sign.
Love was in the air!
Then I set off for Risley Common.
For once, Rosie wasn’t there when I arrived, in the queue of customers.
But then I remembered with a shock that of course, she wouldn’t be. She’d be at the Lockley Meadow market selling her wonderful Thai food from her very own stall.
As I got back in the van, I crossed my fingers that everything was going well for her so far. Then, with a flock of butterflies dancing around inside me, I set off for Lockley Meadow.
I’d arrived a little early specially – because the plan was to find Caleb straight away and tell him that I’d been thinking about things and I’d decided that contrary to the last time we argued, I really did want there to be an ‘us’.
I’d even bought a teddy bear with a large US on his chest to present to Caleb. I was hoping he would find it funny not cringy. (The bear was wearing a T-shirt bearing the American flag and the US actually meant the United States – but I’d thought it was quite witty.)
So anyway, I was all pumped up to make my declaration. And then I marched onto the site and asked Ivan where the boss was, only to be told he was in the portacabin with Loretta, and they’d been in there for a good half hour already.
At that point, all the zing and bravado leaked out of me in one go, and I was forced to face the truth. Life was out to get me.
Swallowing down my huge disappointment, I walked over onto the green to find Rosie’s stall. She had a great spot, right in the middle of an aisle, and I couldn’t even get to speak to her because she and her mum seemed to be doing a steady trade. She spotted me and gave me a big smile and a thumbs-up, though, and that cheered me up a bit as I trailed back to open the doors of the cake van.
The good news (for other people) didn’t stop there.
At Primrose Wood, Judy and Bob arrived at the van together, with Twix the dog between them. But by the time they left with a bag of mini muffins to share, the pair were walking together, with Twix sniffing the bushes on Judy’s side.
As I watched them go, I felt like clapping my hands together in triumph.
My scheming the previous week had apparently worked because they were looking really chummy now.
Even the last stop, Hawksley Rise, had something lovely to offer: No Richard!
But as I pootled back along the country lanes to Sunnybrook, I was feeling almost as miserable as when I got off the plane from New York.
After serving the customers at Lockley Meadow, on my way out I’d stopped again by the building site, ever hopeful – only for Ivan to spot me and shake his head sadly.
Loretta was still in there with Caleb. I was forced to give up and leave.
And now, I could only wonder what on earth they’d been doing in that portacabin all that time.
I promised myself I’d open a bottle of wine and eat an entire family-sized packet of crisps when I finally got home...
*****
The wine was drunk, the massive crisp bag was empty and I was off to bed!
I’d been surrounded by love the whole day – but none of it was mine. I was entitled to feel a tiny bit sorry for myself, surely?
My mobile rang somewhere but I was too exhausted to go and find it immediately so I let it ring. Trailing into the kitchen with the empty wine bottle and glass, I picked up my phone which was lying on the bench below the crisp cupboard.
As I waited for the message, I was endeavouring to boost myself up with positive thoughts.
Things can’t get any worse .
I’ve hit rock bottom so the only way is up from now on.
The message was from Cheryl. She sounded giggly and excited and more than a little bit drunk.
She and Ray had been out for a drink.
Apparently, they were in love . . .