The Price of Ice

Chapter 43

W ording the consent forms for their volunteers without telling them what they were volunteering for was a headache and a half, but even so they had to put some volunteers on a waiting list. One of the omegas attending the classes, Tami, was majoring in maths and had already created surveys to measure their performances. Now they’d added some extra sections for the volunteers to tell them about their experience with alpha will, plus another one for after the experience that included previous exposure to lure.

“It shouldn’t matter much,” Analisa said while they waited for the practical to start. She’d come up with the name for it, and it’d stuck. It felt oddly official to Kallen, but he was trying not to argue about things that didn’t matter. Feeling a little uncomfortable about being treated with respect was to be expected . But at least intellectually he knew he deserved it. Anyone would have. Taylor hadn’t had a degree when he’d started running the group, he’d learned on the go, put his heart into it and hoped for the best, and only then gone back to school. Kallen didn’t have anyone to teach him lure, but he could follow his lead in that much. And if he had to remind himself ten times a day that he was helping and they were grateful, and it was fair, he would. After all, if he had a superpower, it was his ability to do something again and again until it stuck.

They could stop showing up any time, but no one had missed a single lesson so far. Leo had even come the day after badly twisting his ankle, all bandaged up, shrugging when Kallen had asked, “Not like I need to walk to do lure, right? Besides, what if I need my little sister to get me ice-cream from the freezer?”

Kallen had rolled his eyes at him, trusting he was joking since they’d all talked forever about consent and how lure should and shouldn’t be used. Leo was young, but he was there , wasn’t he? He knew how terrible it was to be compelled and limited. It didn’t mean he wouldn’t fuck up, there was no earthly warranty for that for any of them. But he knew better, so Kallen had to trust he would do his best to do better.

They got more betas than either alphas or omegas volunteering, which reflected the general population. But the age range was quite varied. Amongst the sixteen volunteers, two for each of the omegas in the class including Kallen himself, there were a lot of parents and siblings—only the ones who didn’t know about the class to satisfy Tami’s scientific rigour. In Leo’s case, he’d got his grandparents to attend, an alpha-omega couple who’d been together for over half a century and still kept turning towards one another to offer a smile or a glance, just checking in.

Kallen’s throat felt a little tight watching them. He couldn’t tell what it was exactly, but Taylor and he had decided ahead of time Kallen should try with them first since he had the best control.

It didn’t look like he had anything to worry about with these two, really, their hair had gone grey and in the case of the alpha there was little of it left, but they moved easily and comfortably, nothing like Kallen’s one remaining grandfather.

Taylor thanked everyone for coming and instructed them to stay seated and silent for the fifteen minutes their timer was active. If they managed, they’d ‘win’ the round and get a biscuit, he added, which got him more than one smile for its absurdity.

Technically, he was only meant to work with one of them at once, but when they both sat in front of him, Kallen was too curious to resist. He smiled and asked, “Ready?” and waited for their nods to set the timer.

Closing his eyes in front of a strange alpha was slightly uncomfortable, but he did it anyway. Breathing slow and even, he felt the oasis approaching, and then he was there, he was it. He opened his eyes and met the omega’s curious green eyes.

It should have been strange to offer a hug to someone he’d just met, but it didn’t. He let the oasis roll over him, already feeling the warmth of the other man’s body, his scent, crisp and clear and with a hint of sunscreen over it growing more intense as Kallen’s nose got close to his neck.

The older man’s face softened into a smile, eyes shining and Kallen wasn’t surprised to see him put a hand down on the arm of his chair to shove himself upright and take a step closer.

“I...” He turned in surprise towards his alpha, who’d also stood but looked tense, like he was resisting.

“It’s okay,” Kallen told him at once. Damn, this had been a mistake. “It’s okay, I invited you.” He offered one of his hands to each of them. His right was trembling a little when the alpha’s closed over it, but that was okay. They were both afraid of crossing a line and hurting each other, but they weren’t going to. They were going to be careful and make sure they didn’t do anything the other person didn’t want.

He’d thanked them both, telling them to take a break and promising to explain in a moment. Then he had to stop the class and get all his students to give verbal consent to have their hands held during the experiment.

When he got back to the older couple with biscuits and tea, Richard raised an eyebrow. “I thought we had to earn those.”

“You did,” Kallen told the alpha. He didn’t know if it was the knowledge that he could manage to get this particular alpha to back off, or simply the fact that this particular alpha had wanted to back off.

Anthony spoke up then, “You are quite powerful for someone so young.”

Kallen shrugged. “I’m... I think I’m naturally good?”

The other omega nodded. “I had a cousin like that, my uncle had a difficult time with her. At fifteen, she could get her teachers to do what she wanted quite easily. It wasn’t... Well, it wasn’t fair, for one. And he tried to suppress it, used will to try to forbid her using it.”

“Did that work?” It hadn’t occurred to him either will or lure could be used for long-term constraints where the person giving the order wasn’t present.

Anthony shook his head. “Not for long.”

Kallen exhaled. “Thank god,” he said, unthinking. “I mean, it sounds like it was difficult for them, but...”

“No, no,” Anthony waved it all away with a long-fingered hand. “It was ill-done, she left the family when she married. None of us have seen her in... Well, must be sixty years now!” He looked regretful for a moment, and then met Kallen’s eyes again. “So is this why Leo has been so keen to come to these meetings of yours?”

“Um, I’m not really supposed to tell you much about it.”

Anthony laughed. “I see. Anything for science, right, Dick?”

The alpha was already half smiling, and if he’d been twenty years younger Kallen would have bet good money an eyeroll was about to follow. He nodded and they got back to work.

It wasn’t until halfway through the third go around—they’d both resisted much longer the second time, until Kallen had shifted his focus to get them to move closer to each other and they’d folded in a matter of seconds—that Taylor came over to whisper in Kallen’s ear if he’d noticed that once one of them gave in, the other immediately followed.

After that, he’d sent Richard to the next room. He’d had Anthony on his feet in less than ninety seconds. They were bonded, naturally. It didn’t always happen right away, but it would have been difficult for an alpha and omega to be in a long-term relationship without completing the bond their feelings for each other would have opened between them.

He’d known it was a chemical process and not simply a piece of paper, but the moment Richard also stood in less than two minutes, it became clear it was also more than the sum of its parts.

Together, they’d been making Kallen work for it for a good six minutes before giving in.

“Are you aware of each other or just me?” he asked once he’d topped up their teacups.

Richard was frowning a little, but it was Anthony who spoke, “I’m always aware of him. Even when he is not in the room.”

“Oh.” So it was the bond. And none of the other volunteers were bonded couples, which likely meant the data wouldn’t be relevant to Tami’s spreadsheets. “What does it feel like?”

“Warm,” the alpha said, glancing at his partner and seemingly getting caught up watching him. “Like knowing instinctively where the sun is without looking. Although of course the sun is everywhere, and so is Anthony. All I need to do is call him.”

“Call him? Through the bond?”

Anthony was looking right back at Richard. “It feels a bit like your magnetism, a bit of a pull and I know I’m wanted, and I know where he is. I mean, the kitchen or the garden,” he clarified, meeting Kallen’s eyes. “We haven’t tried playing hide and seek.”

Richard laughed at that. “It does feel similar, does it not? Except for me it’s not a pull... More like an invitation, as if there was an empty space that needs filling that I can move into if I want to. Somewhere warm and safe.”

THEIR FIRST PRACTICAL was declared a roaring success, leaving half their volunteers wanting to join the class. Thankfully Taylor had put his foot down and said they’d revisit the issue in the coming year after the traditional three-week break.

They had one more class scheduled before then since Kallen had opted for not having one the week of his own heat. He’d been half afraid of Taylor asking why, but the other man had simply taken him at his word when he’d said he didn’t think he could make it and asked if Kallen would mind if they all tried to muddle along together without him.

Kallen had gone quiet for too long and Taylor had raised an eyebrow, “What’s with the face?”

“Um, well, am I really doing anything much? At the beginning, maybe, but now you can all figure it out on your own, right?”

Taylor had just looked at him for a moment, face impassive. “Would you have said that to your coach?”

“What?” His last coach hadn’t exactly been his favourite person, but without even trying Kallen could think of several times the man had improved his game with his instructions. “That’s not really the same, though. He knew what he was doing, he’d played hockey for twenty years before becoming a coach.”

“Sure,” Taylor said. “And you know what you are doing because you have done it. None of the others could get either of Leo’s grandfathers to move an inch while they were together.”

“And you think they can learn it? That it isn’t just...” He huffed. “Natural talent or something?”

Taylor shrugged. “Can’t know that, can we? But seeing someone do something means it’s possible . None of us had really paid much attention to lure before, and you made it real.”

“So I’m like an inspiration?”

“What do you actually think a teacher is? Or a leader? Someone who knows all the answers already?”

Kallen swallowed, looking away. “Someone who knows some of the answers.”

“That can work, though often you get someone who thinks things can only be done their way. The best teachers I have had are the ones who know they are still learning and who make no effort to hide it, so we can learn together without fearing making mistakes, knowing that learning requires making mistakes.” Kallen dared to meet his eyes, warm and serious. “You are good at this, Kallen. I’m not flattering you. And when I suggested we can do some work without you, I didn’t mean we don’t need you. Sure, maybe we could get somewhere on our own since you have given us the tools, but I think we could get further with you. I bet you whatever you want we’d have tons of questions the next time we meet after the break.”

He sighed, giving in and getting to his feet. “Okay, I... I hear you.”

And he did. He wasn’t quite sure he believed it, but he wanted to, and he trusted Taylor wasn’t buttering him up. “So I’ll see you guys in April?”

“Or you can see us on March 21 st , we’ll be here from about seven till midnight to ring the new year together.”

“Oh.” He hadn’t actually made any plans for it. “How’s that...?”

Taylor grimaced, but it soon became a self-deprecating smile. “Baudu just got confirmation we can have the space yesterday, so I don’t actually know anything. But we thought it would be nice to have a place where everyone could come over, in case people’s families are not supportive. Or just far away.”

Like Levy’s, Kallen realised. He hadn’t asked his boyfriend about his plans, either. “I’ll let you know. But it is a great idea, I’m sure lots of people will appreciate it.”

HE WASN’T JUST MISSING the class but also the meeting that week since he wanted to attend a house viewing. There was barely any time before Levy would be back and even if it was unrealistic to imagine they could move in right away, he wanted to do his best to have everything ready. And besides, the house had been listed for weeks already.

It was all the way on the other side of town, which made it feel like he was somewhere altogether new.

The road was lined with low walls of the yellow stone typical of the area, with what appeared to be quite an old forest on one side and the river on the other. And then he turned the last curve and he saw it, recognising it instantly in a way that felt like it went beyond the photos he’d seen. It was late in the afternoon and the sun was starting to think about going to bed, tinging the sky with pinks and purples. The air was crisp outside once he got out of the car, a feeling Kallen associated with stepping onto the ice, and the sound of the water rushing over the rocks to his right made him turn to watch it flow.

He'd known it was picturesque, but he hadn’t realised that the part of the river they were on was far away enough from the city centre to feel wild like this. The house itself was a two-story built on the same weathered stone and made a concession to the location with a small wooden porch that sank into the river itself, probably something intended to use with a boat or for fishing. Kallen could imagine feeling the water running over his feet as he sat on it under the spring sun, head tilted up to worship.

The realtor was an older beta man, soft and welcoming like it was his own home he was showing. “The owners have moved into a care home,” he told Kallen as he led him down to the kitchen, big window looking out into the water. “So there are still a few things to put in storage, but only if you don’t want them.”

“Like the furniture?”

“Yes, it is a little dated, but then again... Some people appreciate the classics.”

Kallen was already nodding. The wooden table and countertops were rustic but well-cared for. And it belonged there, so why replace something that worked well already? Not to mention that furniture had to be expensive, and he still didn’t have a job.

It wasn’t until they made it to the bedroom, and he opened the wardrobe already imagining which side would be his that he realised that he’d already decided.

Fuck, what was he doing? Levy wasn’t even here, not to mention that he wasn’t sure they could afford it. The cottage was small, a double bedroom and bathroom upstairs, the kitchen and a small living room downstairs. But it was still a house and not a flat.

It was remote enough that they’d need to keep both their cars, which was the one thing Kallen knew the price of with any certainty.

“It’s beautiful,” he told the state agent, doing his best not to gush. It was more than beautiful, it was warm . “I’ll need to talk to my boyfriend first.” The word felt strange in his mouth, but saying it made him smile a little involuntarily. Why was he even keeping it quiet? “But I like it. Could you walk me through the financial side? How much are the expenses and such?”

HE’D TAKEN HIS NOTES on the money details straight to his mother. “So... I did it. I went to see some places, and I like this one.”

Her smile was twinged with something he thought was sadness, but as she nodded it dissipated, like the sun coming out amongst the clouds. “Well done, let’s have a look then.”

Naturally the first thing she’d noticed was that it wasn’t on the low end for one-bedrooms. “I don’t want to discourage you, honey, but, well, not everyone gets a salary as high as you are used to.”

“I know,” Kallen said, and then raised his eyes to meet hers. “I... Levy came to visit last week, and we— Well, we want to live together. Again.”

This time there was no reluctance amidst her joy. She grabbed his hand and squeezed. “I knew it . You looked so happy the day after.”

Kallen shifted a little, even though he was grinning, too. What was the sense in being embarrassed that he’d found someone who made him happy? “Yeah. I... Yeah, he’s... he looks out for me, and he makes me laugh.”

“Can’t ask for much more from a partner, can we?”

He lifted his eyes to hers again, seeing his smile echoed on her mouth—a little braver and more open, like she was confident all this was really happening when he still feared it was too good to be true. “No.”

When he’d got around to coming clean to his dad that night at dinner, the response hadn’t been that enthusiastic. His father hadn’t met Levy, for one, but it likely had something to do with Kallen’s own anger at his lack of support in the past when it came to alphas.

“You know you can stay as long as you want, right?”

“Yeah, dad. I know. But I want to do this. We basically lived together for months, you know? It’s not like I don’t know what I’m getting into.”

“I want to—” His father cut himself off and a quick glance across the table confirmed his mother had something to do with it, but other than looking at her husband, Kallen couldn’t tell what she was doing. Was that part of their bond? Some sort of unspoken communication? Or just years spent together learning each other’s strengths and weaknesses and how to shore them up as needed? “I would like to meet this Levy,” his father said something stiffly.

“Okay,” Kallen told him easily. “He wants to meet you both properly.”

He’d said it unthinkingly, since it was true, but it was immediately obvious he’d struck gold when his father’s eyebrows shot up and then settled, mouth softening as well.

THAT NIGHT WHEN HE got to talk to Levy, he barely managed a greeting and to ask how he was, listening to the answer while biting his own lip.

It was nothing new, Levy had spent the day packing up his car with the things he wasn’t using every day. He’d already arranged to leave the keys on the table and was eating through his last groceries. “I’m starting to get excited,” he admitted.

And Kallen found himself smiling, his rushing thoughts slowing down. “Me too.”

“So what’s going on with you? Did the class go well?”

“Um, hope so, but I didn’t go.”

“Oh?”

“I went to see the water house. Feather Downs, actually, that’s what it’s called.”

Levy snorted. “Typical! Was it nice? Don’t keep me waiting!”

“It was... amazing,” Kallen said, it felt almost like a confession. “I thought the photos had to be well-taken and all that, but actually, it’s better.”

“Seriously?” Levy laughed, this time in open joy. “And... So you wanna?”

It was such a simple question, with no consideration to practicalities or timings. Just if Kallen wanted it. “Yes.”

“Okay, then, tell them we want it.”

“But you haven’t seen it...”

Levy tsked. “I have , and I don’t need to visit it. I trust you.”

Kallen swallowed with some difficulty. “I don’t know why, I have never rented a house before. It could... There could be all sorts of things I didn’t think to ask.”

“We can wait until I get there if you want,” Levy offered, just as easy. “Even though I have no idea what to check either.”

“Mmm... I could ask my dad if he’d come with me. If you are really sure you don’t mind not seeing it ahead of time?”

“Darling,” Levy said, fond and caressing, and Kallen’s heart seized for a moment before redoubling its beat. “As long as you are in it, it will be perfect.”

HIS FATHER READILY agreed, but the realtor couldn’t accommodate them the next day, so in the end it made more sense to postpone it until the sixteenth, when Levy would land in Terali.

This of course meant that Levy would get to see the house and meet Kallen’s father on the same day, but his boyfriend immediately saw the upside to the situation. “At least he won’t be focused on me, you know?”

Kallen would have given almost anything to have his mother along, but she had an appointment she couldn’t miss. He drove to Feather Downs a little too early with his father, who started circling the place like he was planning how to rebuild it or something—not that his father knew all that much about that sort of thing. But he was an adult and house maintenance of the structural kind was traditionally the domain of alphas. He most certainly had to know more than Kallen. Or Levy, for that matter.

There was still half an hour left to their appointment when he heard the rumble of an engine approaching. He turned to see a sedan—the very same model Levy owned, but this one red—sliding neatly next to his own truck.

He was running before he knew it and Levy didn’t manage to close his door before Kallen was on him, seizing his upper arms a little too hard, grinning up at him so hard his face hurt. “You are here.”

Levy looked worn, but he was also smiling. “I am.”

Kallen let go of his arm to touch his cheek instead, marvelling at the rasp of his beard. He couldn’t seem to look away from Levy’s hazel eyes. It could have been him who leaned closer, or Levy who pulled him into the kiss by tugging at his waist, but he couldn’t have said. They were just kissing, as naturally as he breathed, slow and languid at first and wetter and more desperate soon enough, like a spark had been lit.

“Kallen?” His father’s voice startled them both into separating. But when he turned, Kallen couldn’t see him anywhere. He took a moment to adjust himself in his trousers, which got him a pout from Levy that promised great things in his future.

“Coming!” he shouted back. He swallowed, then looked back at Levy. “Ready?”

Levy laughed, nervous. “No, it just occurred to me that maybe it wasn’t the best plan to meet him in the middle of the woods.” He waved a hand around and closed his car door. “Lots of places to hide a body.”

“The realtor will be here in...” He checked his watch. “Twenty minutes.” His heart was racing, but offered his hand anyway, and Levy snatched it out of the air like he thought the offer had an expiration date.

It wasn’t just Levy who was nervous, Kallen’s heart was hammering like he was double-shifting and his muscles required more oxygen right this second. As soon as they came around the cottage and found his dad, Kallen saw him twitch minutely.

“Oh, hello.”

“Hello, sir,” Levy said back, fingers stiffening in Kallen’s.

It hadn’t been that bad after that, a little awkward sure. Kallen’s dad knew for certain they had slept together given their history as teammates. But he seemed willing to give Levy a chance to prove himself, asking questions about the trip and the new job.

“Oh, I forgot,” Levy said, turning to Kallen. “They called me right after I landed, they want me.”

The laugh burst out of him, and he was dragging Levy into another embrace. “Fucking hell, that’s amazing,” he whispered into his neck, only pulling back because he was aware his father was only three steps away and if he kissed Levy’s neck, he wouldn’t bet anything on being able to stop at that. “So when do you start?”

“On the 25 th , if we can get all the paperwork to the solicitors in time. But they want me to come in and meet everyone anyway.”

If they’d needed a sign that they were going to take the house, there couldn’t have been a clearer one. But they went inside when the realtor arrived so Kallen could point out his favourite bits and they could argue good-naturedly about where they’d place everything.

HIS MOTHER WAS ALWAYS going to be an easy sell when it came to Levy, but she couldn’t quite hide her sadness when she saw the cottage video. “So you are taking it?”

“Yes,” Levy told her, gently, like he could read her somehow. “But we are only a half hour drive away.”

She shook her head. “I know, and after Jiro that’s nothing, I just...”

His dad surprised them all suggesting, “We could all have dinner on Sundays. Mikey and Paul sometimes make it, but now that you are back it could be a new family tradition.”

Kallen had only seen his brothers once since he’d been back, since Mikey had gone off on his adventure and Paul was busy with his new job, but he was willing to give it a chance.

He smiled at his dad, chest a little tight. “Yeah, I... I’d like that.” He glanced at his mother, who looked pretty stunned.

She recovered fast enough. “Perfect! And we will have you over for New Year’s, of course!”

“Um,” Kallen turned to Levy, but spoke to her, “Let me get back to you on that one. I mean, it’s last minute and all, but...”

They’d escaped to the garden while his parents cleared the table and got dessert sorted.

“What was that about?” Levy asked once their mouths were available for talking again.

Kallen blinked at him, still a little dazed. “What?”

His boyfriend laughed, clearly pleased at having fried his brain. “New Year’s night? Where else would we go?”

“Oh. Well, what about your family?”

Levy’s face softened. “It’s nice of you to think of them, but they know I’m moving here. They don’t expect me to get over to Veral in the next few days as well.” He traced Kallen’s earlobe, still smiling. “They are happy for me. They are happy about you .”

“Oh.” For a moment, Kallen could only stare at him. He’d told his own parents about Levy, but somehow, he hadn’t thought about his boyfriend doing the same and hearing it, he found he had to blink fast to keep his eyes from tearing up. But I ... he thought and barely held back. “You really... You are sure?”

Levy’s hand drifted lower until he was cupping his face. “About you? A thousand percent sure.”

Kallen leaned into the touch, feeling warm and stupidly happy, and if there was a part of him screaming that this was foolish... Well, he was smiling too hard to listen to it.

“I was hoping we could drive over for a visit sometime. Like, once we are settled?”

Veral wasn’t that far, but it would be a serious commitment. They’d have to stay there for a few days to make the trip worth it, for one. The prospect made him stiffen a little. It made no sense; this was the same family who’d taught their daughter how to use lure and their son to respect omegas. Maybe Levy’s mum was a bit intense about health matters, but there was no reason to be afraid of her.

Except if you were an omega who’d not been taught lure, or that you deserved respect and you’d gone and sold your body and soul to a team who gave you none. Levy had made it clear he didn’t care, but in a way he’d fucked up enough himself that Kallen could sort of believe it. Believe his own mistakes were forgivable.

But his family didn’t have any reason to be so forgiving.

“It’s just... we only—” He squirmed a little, breaking contact with Levy’s hand and immediately regretting it as the cold night air touch his unprotected skin. Levy dropped his hand to his forearm, and Kallen huffed, annoyed with himself. “We haven’t been together for even a month, isn’t it crazy? How fast we are going?” He risked a look up.

His boyfriend looked calm, as usual. “Depends on how you look at it.” He took Kallen’s hands until he could entangle their fingers. “We didn’t make it official, but back in Jiro, it felt real. To me, at least.”

The doubt in his voice made Kallen crash right through his fears. “Me too.” He squeezed Levy’s hands maybe a little too tight, and immediately eased his grip when Levy winced. “Sorry.”

But Levy was already shaking his head. “No, it’s fine. I want to squeeze you to bits sometimes too,” he joked. “And the other thing; I get it, really. Maybe it is too fast. I’m just excited to be here with you, to meet your parents and...” He licked his lips, looking down. “And begin our life together. But I can be patient.”

“I am excited,” Kallen tried to explain. “I swear, it’s just... I’m a little scared too because...” He leaned closer, hiding his face in his favourite spot between Levy’s shoulder and neck. “It feels too good to be true.”

“Yeah,” Levy whispered, and pulled his hands free to draw him into a tight embrace. “But it’s not, it’s real. And we already know you leave your shoes all over the place, and you drive way too fast.” Kallen lifted his face a little to huff a laugh against his neck. “And that I watch golf even though it’s the most boring sport alive. But I can live with that, if I get to wake up with you every day.”

It was hard to argue with that, so Kallen burrowed closer for a minute longer. Soon they’d have to go back in, he knew, but for now, he could have this.

He could have this, for now and as long as it lasted, and maybe, just maybe, it would be a lot longer than he’d ever dared to hope for.