6. Aurora
M y first two weeks on campus are hell on earth.
I’m almost late to all of my classes, I’ve been given a ton of homework, and I’ve fallen asleep studying almost every night.
I’m not stupid, I knew college would be a lot harder than high school, but right now I just feel like I’m already drowning, and I’ve barely even started!
Plus, on top of all that I see the guys everywhere, and being so close to them, yet still so far away, is physically crippling me.
Everest acts like I’m not even here, Griffin barely gives me a second glance since that day at lunch last week, and Harden only offers me a somber smile filled with nothing but regret.
I’ve dreamed of coming to Fairfield University ever since Archer was accepted here and we all came on a tour.
I fell in love with the small town and the beautiful campus, and I just knew it was the place I wanted to go.
I’ve never been someone who envisioned moving far away for college, and Fairfield isn’t too far from New York, so it seemed perfect, but that was before.
Before Everest came here, before we spent a year apart, before he decided he hated me, and I know I should be happy that I am finally here, but this is not how I pictured it.
I thought I’d be welcomed by the guys and they would show me the ropes, that they’d introduce me to their new friends and I’d just seamlessly fall right into the next step of my life.
Instead I’m alone, I have no one, even the roommate I was assigned dropped out, and I’ve been too busy to make friends with anyone else in the dorms. The spare side of the room is still filled with my half unpacked boxes, I have stacks of homework already piling up on my desk, and the dress I picked out for Archer’s engagement party is hanging on the door of the closet staring at me.
The party is tomorrow night, which means I’m heading home in the morning, my mom is sending a car for Everest and me.
My phone vibrates on my desk, and I lift my stare from my art history textbook to see my mom’s name flashing across the screen for the hundredth time since I got here.
I’ve been fielding calls from her all week to talk about everything from my outfit, to the flowers, to the caterers, and you’d think this was Archer’s wedding the way she is going on.
I know he only just got engaged and they wanted to do this party before the season starts again, but he should know better than to let our mom loose with an event to plan and her checkbook.
I silence my phone, not in the mood to deal with any of her last minute crises, and instead focus on my homework.
That focus only lasts approximately two minutes before there is a knock at my door, and I groan as I toss down my pen and stomp toward it.
I’m not sure who would be knocking on my door considering I’ve not officially made any friends yet, but I’m both surprised and happy when I open the door and find my friend Aubree.
Aubree Callows is a junior unlike me, and I only know her thanks to her dating my brother’s friend Alexander Reign.
We’ve hung out a few times back when Archer was still enrolled here, and whenever I’ve caught up with Archer when Reign was around, but still it’s a surprise to see her at my door, presumably looking for me.
“Aubree, hi,” I say in surprise, and her eyes crinkle in confusion.
“You’re not dressed,” she says by way of greeting, pushing past me and striding into my dorm room. “And you haven’t unpacked yet?” she adds, surveying the space as I close the door.
“Oh, I’ve been too busy to unpack,” I say, strolling back over to my desk and taking a seat.
“That still doesn’t explain why you aren’t dressed,” she huffs, moving toward my closet and admiring my dress. “Oh wow, is this for tomorrow? It’s a Striker right?”
I nod, smiling that she recognizes one of Alexander’s mom’s designs. “Yeah, I guess Archer told him I still hadn’t picked something out, so he sent me like ten dresses to choose from.”
“Of course he did.” Aubree shakes her head with a knowing smile, before dropping down onto my bed. “Now come on, get dressed, we’re going to be late.”
I frown, knowing we didn’t have plans. “Late for what?”
“Wow, you’re almost as insufferable as your brother,” she sighs. “It’s the first game of the season tonight. Flyers versus Bears,” she explains, and my heart sinks into the bottom of my stomach.
Of course she’s here about the game, why wouldn’t she be?
She was a staple at Flyers games after she got with Alexander, and I know she continued that tradition last year when he left and the guys got here.
She’s even wearing one of Alexander’s new jerseys, and I saw all her pictures on social media from when she attended games last year.
She wouldn’t know why the thought of even stepping into that arena fills my stomach with dread, and I can’t tell her why.
“Oh, right, yeah, the game,” I repeat slowly, scrambling to come up with a good enough excuse not to go. “I’m actually not going, too much homework,” I lie, and Aubree flicks her stare between me and my books, and the half completed sketch I abandoned earlier.
“Rora, it’s only the second week of classes, I’m a junior and even I don’t have that much work, so quit your bullshit,” she demands, searching my stare knowingly.
“It’s just not a good idea for me to go,” I mumble.
“Did you have a fight with the guys or something?” she pushes, and I almost laugh at the facade I’ve been pulling off this last year.
“Yeah, or something,” I grunt, fidgeting under her assessing stare, before she sighs and flicks her hair.
“Well, who cares, fuck them, we’re still going.
” Standing from my bed, she storms to my closet and rips it open, rifling through it before she pulls out a black mini skirt, some knee-high boots, and a cute off the shoulder sweater.
I know Alexander has mentioned she’s into fashion, but damn, I’m still impressed.
“Put these on and then we can leave.”
Clearly she’s not taking no for an answer, which is how thirty minutes later I find myself strolling through the doors of the arena, sporting the outfit she expertly picked out, a winged eyeliner, and my hair artfully styled in a clip with some face-framing pieces left out.
I also tossed an oversized leather jacket on, because even though we are still experiencing a little warmth from the end of summer, it still gets cold inside the arena.
It’s packed, because of course it is, and I wish I didn’t feel at home with all the people and the noise, as the scent of freshly scraped ice settles something in my soul.
I love this game, I always have, hard not to when I grew up as Archer Gray’s little sister, and it only got worse when Everest joined us and he became as obsessed as I was with our brother and the game.
It was always something that bonded the three of us, and I have no doubt that Ever will follow in Archer’s footsteps and get drafted in a couple of years.
I just wish I could be by his side when it happens.
I shouldn’t be surprised when Aubree leads us to front row seats, even if she weren’t dating an ex-Flyer who has gone pro, she’s still Coach Locke’s daughter.
Thankfully the lights are down as we take our seats, and there are only a few players on the ice, so it looks like we have missed warm-ups.
My plan is to stay seated and hopefully fade into the crowd, I mean, it’s not like they’d actually expect me to be here, not anymore.
In high school, I never missed one of their games, I traded anything to watch them play and they will probably be some of my favorite memories forever.
Everest was captain and center, and he’s the latter here too, whereas Harden plays defense and Griffin is in goal.
Like Archer they have ice in their veins, they were born to do this, and I couldn’t be prouder of them, but right now I wish I was anywhere but here.
When the game is about to start, the players file back out and it takes me less than two-seconds to find them.
Everest takes his spot in the middle, the number 3 clear across his back, Harden skates to the right just behind him, the number 12 shining in the light, and Griffin skates toward the goal, showcasing the number 28.
My nails dig into my palms, my heart hammering in my chest, as my eyes scan the ice.
How long has it been since I came to one of their games?
A year, fifteen months? I can’t even remember, because you never know when the last time is going to be the last time, so you take it for granted, and after a year without them, I realize how much I took them and our time together for granted.
My eyes stay fixed on them throughout the entire game, my breath catching in my throat for every goal, every fight, and every almost glance in my direction.
Aubree talks to me numerous times but I barely hear a word, no, my only focus is them, as I will my stupid heart to feel nothing.
It’s the same thing I’ve been willing it to do for the last year, for every day spent without them, for every ignored call, but like all those other times, it’s completely useless.
I don’t breathe until the final horn rings out and the crowd goes wild, Flyers winning with ease, the final score 4-1.
I’m almost successful in going unnoticed, but just as everyone erupts around me, Harden’s eyes lock with mine, as if he knew I was there the entire time.
I hold his stare, lost in the trance he was always able to put me under, until Aubree knocks my arm, pulling me up and dragging me into her celebration.
“How amazing was that? They kicked ass, woo!” she cheers, and I can’t help but be infected with her joy.
“Yeah it was pretty amazing,” I agree, focusing back on the ice, but Harden has already disappeared in the swarm of celebrating players.