Chapter 9
NINE
Sophia
I didn’t expect talking to the police to be so draining. It’s understandable that they were suspicious of me at first, I can’t imagine that a girlfriend of someone being investigated in a major drug case shows up at the station with a box full of evidence on the regular.
I lied – likely not well – and told them I’d been doing a big spring clean and came across a bunch of stuff I wasn’t meant to find, and that, combined with Josh’s erratic behaviour lately, made me dig deeper.
Once they were convinced that I wasn’t involved in any of the drug activity, they were grateful for my information and co-operation, and drilled me for more, for what seemed like hours. I even signed paperwork allowing them to search the house Josh and I share so they could go in as soon as possible, without having to get a warrant.
Josh is going to be in for a shock when he comes home and finds the house tossed. But maybe he’ll already be in cuffs by then. I don’t know how any of this works.
Aria losing her shit is what finally got me out of there, and back to the safety of Bryson’s car.
After packing up my house, he had me follow him in my loaded-up car, and we went back to his house. He offered to take me to my parents, or wherever I wanted to go, but I couldn’t face them today.
I don’t know what I did to deserve the level of commitment that Bryson has to helping me, but he’s all in. Even insisting that I take his bed while he crashes on the couch. He unloaded everything, set up Aria’s crib, and made me feel safe and welcome.
Only then did we go to the police.
Everything feels like a blur, I’m still having trouble comprehending that this is really happening to me.
Black eyes, cuts and bruises were bad enough, but this isn’t something I can just brush under the rug and pretend it isn’t happening.
The father of my child could face hard jail time .
Truthfully, I hope he does wind up in a cell. I think it’s the only way I’ll feel safe. It’s the only way I’ll be convinced that Aria is safe from him too.
The police advised me to apply for a restraining order, which I did – the photo evidence I had of my latest injuries was enough to get it in front of a judge to be signed off. They also suggested I stay far away from the house, and anywhere Josh might try and look for me, until they’ve executed their search and made their arrests. Their timeline has unexpectedly moved up to right now, so I really hope they have all their ducks in a row.
I won’t be safe if they fuck this up and he goes free.
I blocked Josh’s number so that he can’t try and contact me. I can’t explain why, but part of me felt guilty doing it.
He’s got no idea what’s about to hit him.
He should know, though. He should be expecting it. You can’t just go around cooking up drugs, selling them and shooting them up your veins, and not ever consider that at some point it might all come crashing down.
“Are you okay?” Bryson asks me.
“Not really,” I whisper.
He lifts his hand from the gear stick, like he’s going to touch my leg, but changes his mind and sets it back down.
“What did they say? ”
Everything. So. Much. Talking.
“I’m not really sure on all of it, it was a lot to take in, but from what I could understand, they’d planned to raid the shop later in the week, but with me coming in, and giving them access to mine and Josh’s flat, they’re moving things forward. I guess they’ll arrest Josh with the evidence I gave them, and I heard two of them talking about getting a rushed search warrant through so they could go through the shop and Gavin’s property as early as tonight as well.”
“Sounds like the empire is about to fall.”
I nod. I’m so tired I’m not sure I can do much more talking. It’s an effort to keep my eyes open. My body has been in survival mode for too long. I’m going to crash soon.
“You did good, Soph. I’m proud of you,” he says quietly.
I don’t deserve his praise, I definitely haven’t done anything to be proud of. I’m a failure. The past couple of years has been nothing but one stupid decision after another, and now my life is in total shambles. I’ve put myself and my baby in danger, and part of me thinks I deserve what I got for being so stupid, but Aria doesn’t deserve to live in this narrative. My baby doesn’t deserve to be homeless with a delinquent for a father.
I can feel his eyes on my face.
“Did they give you the protection order against him? ”
“We filled out the paperwork. It has to go in front of a judge or something.”
The answer uses up the last of my strength. I close my eyes.
“You’re allowed to fall apart now,” I hear him whisper.
So I do.
“You need to answer her, Soph,” Bryson insists gently. “She’ll be worried about you. And Aria.”
I know he’s right. It’s cruel to ignore my mother in this situation – she’s not to blame in the slightest, but I can’t bring myself to face any more reality. I’m also scared of what she might tell me. I have no doubt that the whole town will be informed about the raid at mine and Josh’s flat by now, and the auto supply shop. People will be talking.
I know that Josh, his uncle, cousin, and several of their workers were all arrested.
But that’s all I’ve been told.
I sit there watching the phone ring.
I can’t take it. Any more details might push me over the edge.
“At the very least you should send her a message that you’re okay,” he pleads. “She won’t know if you’ve been thrown in jail, you need to tell her you’re safe. ”
I guess I can do that.
I should listen to him. The poor guy shouldn’t even be in this position. We shouldn’t be his problem, but here we are, making his life more complicated. He’s probably wondering how he got caught up in this mess.
The least I can do is take his advice and make it known to my family that I’m safe and have Aria with me.
Mum finally gives up trying, and my phone falls silent. She’s been calling every half hour, so I know the silence won’t last long.
I type out a quick message and hit send. I’m not being fair, I know that. If Aria left me in the dark like this one day, I’d be beside myself. But at the end of the day, I can’t give something I haven’t got. And right now I haven’t got anything.
Sophia: I’m not up for talking at the moment, but me and Aria are safe. I’m sorry, I know you must be worried. We’re staying with a friend. I’ll come home soon, I just need some time to let things die down.
“There. I text her,” I tell him.
I put my phone on silent and slide it in between the couch cushions where I won’t have to look at it.
He’s sitting on the ground with Aria, playing some kind of game with her. I’ve been here in the same room with them for however long it’s been, but I’ve been in zombie mode, not taking any of it in.
“Do you think I need a lawyer?” I ask him.
He looks at me blankly. “Why would you need a lawyer?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. What if he tries to say I was involved… or he tries to take Aria, or he gets away without being sent to jail?”
“None of those things are going to happen.”
“You don’t know that.” I can feel my bottom lip trembling.
“I do know that. The police know you’re not involved. There’s not going to be any evidence that you are – because you’re not. And he’s going to prison. He’s a drug dealer, Sophia, he’s not going to be allowed to take your baby from you.”
“Crazier things have happened.”
“If it will make you feel better, then you should get a lawyer. It’s not going to hurt.”
“I’ll have to talk to my parents, I can’t afford one on my own.”
“I’ll handle it. My father has connections.”
I flick my gaze to his face. “You don’t have to do that, you’ve already done so much.”
“It’s fine. My parents owe me a favour, it’s the least they could do for me.”
He always talks about his parents in such a strange way. Everything he says about them seems to be laced with an undertone of bitterness .
I don’t have the energy for it right now, but one day I’d like to try and unpack his family dynamic.
I also don’t have the energy to fight him. If he wants to sort me out some fancy lawyer, I’ll let him. Beggers can’t be choosers.
“Okay, thank you.”
He nods.
“For everything,” I add. “I know this can’t be easy on you, having us here. And I know I’m as good as useless. But thank you. You’ve been so great to us.”