Chapter Twenty-Seven
Rafe’s every nerve screamed with the desire to take Victoria’s hand in his; to warm her icy fingers and reciprocate the comfort she was offering him, but he did not.
He could not.
He could not force that upon her.
“What can I do to help?” Luke asked from behind him, making him want to gnash his teeth.
It was on the tip of Rafe’s tongue to tell Victoria’s brother to go to the devil, but he did not.
Instead, he tamped down his pride and looked at the man.
This was not about their disagreements; this was about Dominic.
They had to find him before he was hopelessly lost or hurt or…
God help him. Rafe’s heart thudded in his chest.
They had to find him.
Quickly.
“We must form search parties. Nan said the house and immediate grounds have already been searched, so we need to extend the reach. We will fan out from the house in a pinwheel fashion.” He looked to the gathered staff.
“We must check everywhere; trees, hollows, any carriage houses or other structures we come across. Search gardens and by the pond where he likes to fish.”
Much to Rafe’s surprise, Victoria told him, “I will go with you.” He was so relieved that all he could do was nod.
He needed her by his side; he just hadn’t known how to put it into words…
yet, somehow, Victoria had known. What was more, she’d acted upon it rather than opting to join Luke. It gave him a thread of hope.
Victoria was already fully dressed for travel, but Rafe did not bother to don a coat before they took their leave. With a few more shouted directions, footmen, maids, grooms, Luke, Rafe, and Victoria all set off in different directions.
After some trudging through tall grasses while calling Dominic’s name, he and Victoria began following the main path leading from The Cottage toward the nearest village.
The search had gradually grown wider until the participants could no longer hear one another shouting for the lad.
He had no idea how much time had passed, but he knew every minute felt like an hour.
On the other hand, every minute they were not tracked down by a messenger coming to tell them that Dominic’s body had been found drowned in the pond or trampled by livestock in a field was encouraging.
It didn’t make him want to rip out his own hair any less, but at least it gave him a tendril of optimism, however fragile.
“Dom!” Rafe bellowed through cupped hands, hoping it would carry the sound to his nephew’s ears.
He prayed that the boy would show up around the next bend or pop out from behind the nearest tree.
Though Rafe’s heart was racing and the frenetic energy was building within him, he did his best to remain outwardly calm.
“Dom!” He tried again but was greeted only by birdsong and sheep bleating in the distance.
One side of the rutted dirt road overlooked fields and clusters of trees; the other had a low, mossy stone wall behind which chickens wandered and clucked as they picked through the herbs and vegetables for morsels.
The bucolic scene should have been pleasant and relaxing, but every one of Rafe’s nerves felt as if a knife were being held to them.
“Dominic!” he called again, a little louder and harsher than he had been.
He spat a curse beneath his breath when there was still no response.
Rafe raked a rough hand through his hair, scrubbing it back and forth with a growl of frustration. He froze when something caught his other hand and squeezed it.
Looking down, he saw Victoria’s gloved hand wrapped around his, holding it as tightly as if they clung together in a storm at sea.
That was certainly an accurate description of how turbulent Rafe’s insides felt at that moment.
Warmth seeped through her hand and into his, instantly providing comfort when he’d believed such a thing impossible so long as Dominic remained missing.
His wife offered him a brief flicker of a smile, a small gesture of reassurance he hadn’t realized he’d desperately needed.
Rafe squeezed her hand in return, and they walked onward together just like that.
“Dominic!” Victoria called, taking her turn.
She did not seem to care one bit that it was considered unladylike to traipse through the countryside shouting like a fishmonger’s wife, and he loved that about her.
He loved that she cared enough for Dom that she’d set aside her anger for him and her plans to leave The Cottage to assist him in locating the boy.
He loved her for her priorities, her optimism, and her determination. “Dominic! Dominic, where are you?”
“I meant what I said earlier,” Rafe spoke up, and Victoria’s head whipped to face him.
Though she did not yet try, his fingers tightened around hers so she could not break free.
“I realize that this is entirely inappropriate timing, but it simply must be said in case I do not have another chance to speak with you alone. I love you, Victoria. The fact that you are out here with me instead of traveling to the coast with your brother makes me love you all the more.”
“You are correct; now is not the time.” Her words were harsh, but her tone was not.
“I love you. If I have to say it a thousand times a day, then I will. I will be eternally sorry that you were injured by what you heard last night, and I will gladly spend a lifetime making it up to you. Even if you do not fully love me back—even if what I said has permanently injured your feelings toward me—I know you love the children. I need you. They need you. And I am not too noble a man to use them as a bargaining chip to try to convince you to stay.” A sad smile tugged at one side of his mouth for the briefest of moments, but Victoria said nothing.
“I needed Lady Dallow to believe that I could love no woman.
She is delusional and driven enough that she would do everything in her power to make our lives miserable if she believed there was the slightest bit of hope that I might turn my affections to her once more.
If she thought my heart existed, then that gave her a goal.
If she thought affection played no role and, instead, I would do everything in my power to keep your money, then that was a battle she could not win.
“I know it is disgusting, and I hated the words when they crossed my lips. I would never have done it if I had thought there was another way. I would gladly stand before the entire country and declare my feelings if I thought it would repair what has been broken, but only you can decide whether my apology is sufficient…whether my words destroyed any chance I might have had of earning your heart.”
They’d approached the house whose gardens had been infested with poultry.
A woman in homespun brown clothing was busy taking down the washing and dropping it into a basket before the threatening sky followed through on its promise of rain.
Victoria hesitated a moment before gently tugging her hand free from his.
Her voice was barely above a whisper when she spoke.
“You were wrong about one thing.” Rafe’s breath caught in his throat.
“I already fell in love with you.” Her eyes were glistening with fresh tears when they met his.
“Had I not been in love with you, then I would not have been so destroyed by your adamancy that you would never love me.” Rafe was too struck dumb by disbelief to resist when she stepped away.
He could only watch as Victoria swiped away her tears and pasted on a smile before approaching the woman working in her front garden.
“Good morning!” Victoria greeted her cheerily, ignoring the skeptical expression on the woman’s weathered face at being approached by a toff in expensive clothing, with a strange accent to boot.
“My husband and I, well, our nephew has gone missing. We’ve been staying at The Cottage just up the road.
You haven’t seen a lad about yea tall with dark hair and eyes pass this way recently, have you? ”
The other woman’s eyes softened some at the thought of a missing child. “Just a boy, ye say?”
Victoria nodded. “He just had a birthday a few weeks ago. He is only nine years old, and we are very concerned. He was not located on the grounds and he’s not familiar with the area.”
The woman turned to the side of the small cottage and shouted, “Ye seen a lad come this way, John?”
“Eh?” came a gruff reply.
“I said, ye seen a lad? One’s gone missin’.”
A dirt-stained man in a floppy hat that did nothing to protect his sunburned face walked ’round to the front of the house.
He still carried the shovel he’d been using.
John appeared to be of the right age to be the woman’s husband.
He took one look at the quality of Victoria and Rafe’s clothing, set aside his shovel, and crossed his arms over his barrel-shaped chest.
“I might’ve seen a lad…but me memory ain’t what it used to be—oof!”
“They’re missin’ a child, and here ye are tryin’ to get money from them!” his wife scolded him after delivering a sharp elbow to his gut. “Just tell ’em the truth.”
“No,” groaned John. “I ain’t seen no lad on the road today.”
His wife nodded, satisfied with her husband’s response. “There ye have it,” she said, looking back at Victoria. “I hope ye find ’im. I’ll send the boy your way if I do spot ’im.”
“Thank you, and thank you for your time,” Victoria said earnestly before fishing a coin from the waist pocket of her traveling dress and holding it out to the woman.
She looked as if she wanted to decline, but Victoria insisted.
The coin quickly disappeared down the woman’s bodice with a grateful nod.
Turning, Victoria returned to Rafe’s side with a shake of her head. They resumed walking once more.
“I almost feel sorry for John,” Rafe muttered once they were out of sight of the cottage.