Chapter Eighteen
THE RESTAURANT WAS empty save for one table, and Ethan had risen to his feet by the time Guilia reached him. "I'm guessing this is one of your properties?" Even the classiest restaurants could be bribed into tattling about their guests, and more so when that guest happened to be the world's most notorious supermodel.
"Company property."
The polite brevity of Ethan's voice caught Guilia off guard, and the smile on her lips faltered. "You've changed," she blurted out.
Instead of answering, Ethan pulled a chair out for her, and she sank down on it without a word. He had changed. The words echoed in her mind endlessly as she watched him take a seat opposite her. He was still beautiful, still sexy, but his eyes...
"Ethan..."
His hazel eyes met hers without hesitation, and it was like seeing her world disintegrate. He can't see me anymore, she thought wildly. It's over. It's over. Over!
Ethan watched the play of emotions on Guilia's face with a disconcerting sense of disattachment. Did she know that she had revealed more of her thoughts in the past five seconds compared to all the years they had been together?
Guilia's sharp nails dug into her palms. "I'm too late, aren't I?"
"It was over between us for a long time," Ethan said evenly. "And I think you knew that well before I did."
Guilia couldn't help lifting her chin even as guilt colored her cheeks. "We were happy—-"
"For a time."
"I know I made a lot of mistakes," she burst out, "but I promise I'm going to change—-"
"Guilia—-"
Something inside her snapped at the way he said her name—-
Like her name was just any other name—-
Guilia grabbed the wineglass and smashed it against the table.
Ethan shot to his feet. "Goddammit, Guilia—-"
She held the jagged stem of the wineglass to her wrist. "If y-you leave me, I'll kill myself—-" Her voice broke off when she saw the look in his eyes.
Anger and disgust, she would've expected.
But not this.
Not this sorrow—-
This kind of sorrow that told her, oh God...
This sorrow could only be possible if he already knew—-
"You know the truth," Guilia cried out. "Don't you?"
"You told me yourself," Ethan said heavily.
"Liar!" Guilia could feel herself starting to shake, and she threw the shard of glass away. "I would never have—-"
"You were in the hospital for several days after the accident. You were delirious, and you told me what happened."
Ethan really knew.
"You told me you'd kill yourself if I ever found out the truth—-"
Ethan knew everything.
"And that you believed I would never be able to love you—-"
But he had.
"If I knew the truth..."
And yet he had.
"But I was wrong," Guilia choked out. "W-Wasn't I?"
"Yes."
The pain nearly drove her to madness. "You still loved me..."
"I did."
"Even though you knew the truth..."
"Yes."
"But now, I'm too late."
Ethan didn't need to answer. The way Guilia was crying told him she already knew, and as he watched her shoulders shake, it was as if he was seeing pieces of his life fall into place.
He might have loved Guilia once, but it was over.
And it would always be over.
Because Anah was his life now.
And always would be.
Only minutes had passed when Ethan walked Guilia out to her car, but it felt as if her whole life had changed. She turned to him impulsively, and the way Ethan stiffened had a shaky smile curving over her lips. "There's no need to look so worried. I won't make any trouble for you again."
"Even if you did," Ethan murmured, "it wouldn't change a thing."
And there was her answer , Guilia thought, to the question she no longer needed to ask. She could try to make trouble for him still. Play on his guilt or threaten to expose Hartland Initiative even. She could've done anything, and none of it would've made a difference.
"When Travis and his father were arrested..." She saw the way Ethan's lips tightened, and Guilia swallowed hard. She had always wondered what kind of person could've dared gone up against those men, whose wealth had given them nearly unchecked power, and now she knew.
"Thank you," Guilia whispered.
"I only wish I had been able to do it sooner."
"Do you think," she asked wistfully, "if I had given us a chance, it would've worked between us?"
"It could've," Ethan answered levelly, "but there's no way to know anymore, and you'd only be wasting your time thinking about it." Anah was the woman he'd love for the rest of his life, and after this meeting with Guilia, he was all the more determined to not let a single secret exist between them.
Secrets, no matter how well-meaning, could only keep people apart, and he could only hope—-
"What did she say," Guilia asked hesitantly, "when you told her about asking me to marry you?"
"She doesn't know," Ethan said curtly, "but I plan to tell her—-" He saw the look on Guilia's face.
No.
And when Guilia stammered, "I'm so s-sorry..."
Ethan could feel the air being sucked out of his world, and it took every effort not to keep his hand from shaking as he took his phone out of his pocket.
It's going to be fine.
Anah's phone started ringing.
You can fix this.
But eventually his call was redirected to voicemail.
You're not going to lose her.
He tried to convince himself of this as he drove like a madman and collected speeding tickets along the way.
It's going to be fine. You can fix this. You're not going to lose her.
But when he got to his place, he knew...
The moment he stepped inside...
He knew.
Even before he saw the ring she had left on his bedroom console, he already knew.
The emptiness that gnawed at his heart was all that he needed to feel...
And he knew.
She was gone.
She had left him.
Because she wanted him to be happy.