Chapter 34
ALEX
Iwatch her run into her building like her arse is on fire.
Fuck, what was I thinking?
I clearly wasn’t, at least not with my brain.
Brooke has been an anomaly since she entered my life, turning my thoughts upside down. The guys have teased me relentlessly, no doubt able to see what I couldn’t admit to myself or had chosen to ignore… My physical attraction to my PA.
I drop my forehead against the steering wheel before sitting up. She turns as she enters the building, shooting me one last glance before she disappears.
“What the fuck, Sandro,” I hiss, using the nickname my parents have always used. “You’re her boss and fifteen years her senior. Sue in HR would have a fit, not to mention everyone else.”
But that doesn’t stop the longing in my chest, or the throbbing of my cock when I think about the taste of her lips on mine.
Fuck!
The streets are surprisingly quiet. Most of the Christmas revellers are on foot rather than driving.
I pull into the underground garage of my building.
The elevator arrives immediately when I call it, taking me straight to the penthouse.
My penthouse spans two floors and offers three-hundred-and-sixty-degree views of New York from its various rooms.
I pour myself a scotch and down it in one. The burn at the back of my throat offers a small measure of relief.
I pour another, carrying it towards the window and staring down at the city below.
I stayed off alcohol all day, not wanting to compromise my judgement.
Ha, how did that work out for you, old man?
I can almost hear Dante’s gibe.
I don’t know what it is about her. It’s like she’s mature beyond her years.
Like she understands the life I live, but that’s impossible.
You have to have been raised in this fucked up world to understand the fake smiles and air kisses shared among so-called friends who would stab you in the back at the first opportunity.
It’s why I fell in love with Loretta. She may have been a model, but she was normal.
Raised by working-class parents, she had developed a backbone that meant she could hold her own and was not afraid of hard work.
In all the time we were together, her head was never turned by the fake glitz and glamour that surrounded us. I was the one to fuck that up.
I take another swallow, throwing my head back.
I don’t even blame her.
FIVE YEARS EARLIER
“I’m leaving you,” she says.
“What do you mean?”
It’s been a long day… a long week if I’m honest, and my body is bone-weary.
“I’ve tried, Alex, I really have,” she says, tears streaming down her cheeks. “But it takes two to make a marriage work. I can’t do it alone.”
I take a step forward, unsure where this has come from, but pause when she steps back. I run a hand through my hair. “Do we have to do this now? I’ve had a really bad day. Let me grab a quick shower and we can talk.”
She smiles sadly. “That’s the problem. It’s all work. I’ve been trying to do this, make you listen to me for months. It’s not working. I want more.” She lets out a sob. “No, I deserve more.”
My eyes are drawn to the suitcases by her feet.
Fuck! She means it.
“Look, I’m not sure what’s happened but I promise to try harder.” A crushing pain hits my chest.
“I’m sorry, Alex. I love you. I think a part of me always will, but I can’t cope with being your second or third choice.”
“You’re not,” I say, the desperation in my tone growing. I reach for her again, but she sidesteps. “I love you too, Lori. We can work this out.”
She shakes her head sadly.
“No, we can’t. I’ve tried, but I’ve been alone in this for too long.”
“Are you talking about not getting pregnant? We can see someone.”
Another tear trails down her cheek.
“I made the appointment.”
I stare at her, confused.
“It was today, Alex. You never showed,” she says. “I waited and waited.”
“Oh, shit, I’m sorry. Today was…”
“That’s the problem. Today is always going to be one of those days. I’ve begun to realise that. I can’t ask you to change. You’re the man I fell in love with. But we have different priorities.”
“Please, Lori…”
“I’m sorry, Alex.” Her voice catches. “I can’t do this anymore.”
I shake my head frantically.
“Lori…”
“Goodbye, Alex. My lawyer will be in touch.”
I look to the doorway. The one she walked through without a backward glance five years ago.
It was later that I found out about Myles.
The mild-mannered NFL player with a heart-of-gold whom she’d met the year before.
Not that I blame her. She begged me to be there for her, and I let her down in the worst possible way.
She’d given me one last chance, only I hadn’t known that it was.
I’d been too caught up in my own crazy world to recognise it.
I have no one but myself to blame for that breakdown.
Now she’s happy. She and Myles have beautiful twins.
They’re deeply in love, sharing the life they’ve built together.
My thoughts drift back to Brooke.
Shit.
I pick up my phone.
ME:
Brooke, I’m sorry. That was totally inappropriate.
A blue tick appears, letting me know she’s read it. Nothing.
I drink more scotch, wondering how many ways Sue in HR can skin me alive for my stupidity.
My phone pings.
brOOKE:
Don’t worry. It’s been a stressful night.
ME:
That’s no excuse.
brOOKE:
Please forget it. I have. It’s Christmas. Thank you for a lovely day with your family.
I stare at her words.
Forget it! She has…
My chest bubbles as I read her words. Was she as affected by the kiss as I was?
It’s Christmas.
Is she giving me an out for my stupidity? I know I should grasp it with both hands, but… she’s right. It was a stressful night. There’s still the New Year’s party. I heard Mother invite her. Maybe I’ll get a chance to talk to her then.
ME:
Goodnight, Brooke. Merry Christmas.
I hit send and throw my phone down on the sofa behind me. Closing my eyes, I think about her scent, the feel of her lips pressed against mine. My body hardens instantly.
You’re a sick man. You dumped one woman, and then pulled another straight into your arms, devouring her on the front seat of your car. What were you thinking?
It’s clear you weren’t. At least not with a sentient part of your anatomy!
I strip off my clothes and head for the shower, turning the water to cold.
I step in, the icy jets stealing my breath.
Fuck.
My cock ignores the chill, throbbing until I take it in hand.
I turn up the temperature, allowing my chilled skin to thaw.
What are you doing? Masturbating like a horny teenager to the memory of a mere kiss.
I squeeze my cock hard, moaning at the sensation before grabbing my shower gel and squirting some onto my hand. I grip myself hard, pumping up and down. I drop my head forward under the spray, blocking out the rest of the world. I close my eyes.
Imagining Brooke’s delicate hands touching and caressing me… I come with a force I haven’t felt in a long time. My cum hits my stomach coating my fingers. My body shudders with release as exhaustion from the day, from Aubrey and then Brooke, overtakes me.
I shower off the evidence of my desire for a woman I have no right to want. Part of me is disgusted, the other is intrigued.
I drop face-down onto the bed. Tomorrow, I’ll face my mother and set her straight.
No interfering in my love life. If I want Mother to meet someone I’m seeing, I’ll damn well introduce them myself.
I don’t expect to be blindsided. Although in some ways she’s helped me.
Aubrey and I had already reached a crossroads.
It was a matter of when, not if, we parted ways.
As for Brooke, that was unexpected, and not something I’ll be sharing with my mother.
I just hope Brooke feels the same way. If not, I’ll have a lot of explaining to do.