Chapter 11 #2
‘Well, I mean, the clue is in the name. It’s for people who are, you know… seeking a job.’
‘And you’re not?’
He shrugged. ‘There’s not much demand for my skill set. But if you know of any boy bands that are recruiting…’
‘Oh, come on, I’m sure there are lots of other things you could do.’
‘Like what?’
‘You could be a waiter, work in a shop—’
‘Who’d hire me? I don’t have any experience and I’m not qualified for anything. I’ve never had a normal job in my life.’
‘Well, maybe it’s time you got one. But in the meantime, you should apply for benefit. You’re entitled to it – you paid tax after all.’
‘I did that all right.’ He frowned. ‘But I’m not sure it was the right kind.’
‘Well, no harm in applying anyway. It’s insurance – you’ve paid into it in case of a rainy day, and now that rainy day has come, you have a right to claim it. I mean, you pay house insurance, right?’
‘Yeah…’
‘And if there was a fire, you’d expect them to pay out.’
‘Well… not if I’d burned the place down myself.’
‘It’s not like you committed arson! Maybe you didn’t take care of some dodgy wiring, or you left a faulty appliance plugged in overnight. But you didn’t deliberately torch the place. It was an accident.’
‘Even if it was really my fault?’
‘Yes. You’d still be entitled to claim on your insurance. Same with benefits.’
‘Still… I don’t want to be one of those welfare cheats like you read about in the papers.’
Ella rolled her eyes. ‘Do you always think in such stereotypes? People on benefits aren’t all lazy scroungers who just can’t be arsed getting a job.
You shouldn’t believe everything you read in the papers – you of all people should know that.
It’s not cheating if you’re genuinely struggling and you legitimately qualify for it. That’s what it’s for.’
‘Am I struggling, though?’
‘Do you have any other income apart from my rent?’
‘No.’
‘It’s hardly a living, is it? Have you really never considered doing something else?’
He shrugged. ‘I did get offered a couple of reality shows. But I didn’t want to eat spiders or spend the summer banged up in prison with a bunch of superannuated soap stars.’
‘Really?’ Ella smiled, perking up. ‘You got offered Celebrity Cell Block?’
‘Yeah. But I turned it down. I mean, I may be washed up, but I don’t want to make a career of it. Anyway, I’m too young for the has-been circuit.’
‘Would have been interesting, though.’
‘Humiliating is what it would have been.’
‘Well, maybe you should consider training to do something else? You know, in case your solo career doesn’t take off in the way you hope.
’ She was trying to be diplomatic. ‘Our goals need to be realistic and achievable. Even if you really work at it, you can’t rely on the fame thing happening – and, even if it does, it won’t happen overnight.
You should set some more short-term goals in the meantime. ’
Roly gave her a careful look. ‘Okay, I’m going to tell you something. But you have to swear you won’t tell anyone.’
‘Okay.’
‘I’m serious. This is big, okay? If it got out—’
‘Roly, I won’t tell anyone, I promise.’
‘Okay.’ He took a deep breath. ‘I saw Charlie the other day. It’s all very hush-hush, and nothing’s definite yet, but… they’re talking about a reunion.’
‘An Oh Boy! reunion?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Wow, that is big. And they want you to do it with them?’ Her heart lightened, not just for him but, shamefully, for herself. Maybe the damage she’d done wasn’t irrevocable. She beamed. ‘Oh, Roly, that’s brilliant!’ She moved to hug him, but he pulled back, shaking his head.
‘No. Charlie gave me a heads-up, but I’m not even supposed to know about it.’
‘Oh.’ Her smile faded. Roly was trying to hide it, but she could see how hurt he was. Fuckers! ‘Well, screw them. You don’t need Oh Boy! anyway. I hope their comeback is a massive failure.’
‘Well, I don’t. I mean to be part of it, and I want it to be a huge success.’
‘You’re sure that’s what you want?’
‘Yeah, of course. That’s what this is all about, isn’t it? Getting back to my best life.’
‘Yes, but… it doesn’t have to be exactly what your life looked like back then. I mean, Oh Boy! always had a shelf life anyway, didn’t it?’
‘What do you mean?’
‘It was a boy band – haven’t you kind of grown out of that?’
‘Lots of boy bands make comebacks when they’re older. The fans have always wanted a reunion. They’d love to see us back together again – all five of us.’
‘I’m sure they would. But what about you? Aren’t you interested in doing your own thing any more?’
‘Er… no. Been there, still have the bruises.’
‘You really want to go back to singing those throwaway pop songs? Doing those cheesy dance routines? Having little girls screaming at you and perving over your arse?’
‘Our fans are all grown up now. It’d be twenty-somethings perving over my arse.’ He grinned, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. ‘You’re just a musical snob.’
‘I’m not! I just thought you might want to… evolve. Do something different. You really want to be in a band called Oh Boy! at your age?’
‘Yes. I really do.’ He sounded annoyed now.
She should back off, be more supportive.
She was just a little shocked that this was what he wanted.
But he was right – it was his life, his goals, and she wasn’t going to be responsible for taking his dreams away from him a second time.
Maybe she could even atone if she helped him get back what he’d lost.
‘I just wanted you to think it through and be sure these goals are what you really want – not just what you think you should want, or what you wanted ten years ago. I mean, you were only in Oh Boy! for three years. Maybe you have a slightly rose-tinted memory of what it was like.’
‘You sound like Charlie. He said I was lucky I got out when I did, before it all got too serious and wasn’t fun any more.’
‘That is such bullshit!’ Ella said, her hackles rising.
Some of her old college friends had done the same to her – people who had the career she’d wanted trying to tell her she was better off out of it, because it turned out the meetings were boring or the in-fighting was relentless or the hours were longer than they’d hoped.
‘Be careful what you wish for,’ they’d say ruefully as they complained about difficult students and rigid bureaucracy.
Hazel had never pulled that crap on her.
She didn’t pretend that she found academic life a bed of roses – she’d had her share of disappointments and frustrations, and she was honest and upfront about them.
But she also never tried to convince Ella she’d had a lucky escape.
Roly smiled. ‘Yeah, that’s what I said.’
‘Sometimes things are just shit, and you’re allowed to think they’re shit. You don’t have to find some silver lining in everything. Beside, just because that was his experience, doesn’t mean it’d be yours too.’
‘Yeah, I’d rather find out for myself.’
‘I presume Charlie’s up for the reunion?’
‘Of course.’ He rolled his eyes.
‘Okay, sorry.’ She held her hands up. ‘If that’s what you want, then go for it.’ She really wanted it for him now. Fuck Charlie and the rest of them!
‘It may not even happen. There are no firm plans yet or anything. But I want to be ready if it does.’
‘So how are you going to go about getting back with the band?’
‘I’m going to work on some new stuff. Record a few songs and send them to Charlie, maybe even release a few tracks. Plus, I’ll get back in shape, of course.’ He patted his belly. ‘You need to be fit for those cheesy dance routines.’
‘And in the meantime, you should sign on for Jobseeker’s Allowance.’
Roly sighed. ‘Okay, I’ll make you a deal,’ he said eventually. ‘I’ll sign on if you call Andrew.’
Ella chewed her lip, considering. It would be interesting to see Andrew again. And she really wanted Roly to sign on… ‘Okay. Deal.’
‘Yes!’ Roly high-fived her.
‘What about Pippa? What are you going to do to get her back?’
‘All the other stuff on this list, basically – get fit, be famous, have money…’
Ella raised her eyebrows, but said nothing. She didn’t want to seem judgey. But she was totally judgey.
‘Pippa wasn’t so bad, you know,’ Roly said, as if he felt the disapproving vibes coming off her. ‘I know you never liked her, but—’
‘I only met her once. I didn’t know her. But I didn’t like her for you,’ she said defensively. ‘I thought you could do better.’
‘Me?’ He gave a hoot of laughter. ‘I was totally punching with her.’
‘No, you weren’t. That’s ridiculous.’
‘Come on. I’m not an idiot. There’s no way she’d have been with me if I was just some Joe Bloggs.’
‘And you’re okay with that?’
‘Why shouldn’t I be? She was an underwear model,’ he said, as if that explained everything.
Ella rolled her eyes. ‘Of course, the pinnacle of human achievement – getting paid to stand around pouting in your pants.’
‘Hey! She didn’t just stand around in her pants. She walked for Ariana’s Boudoir, I’ll have you know.’
‘I don’t even know what that sentence means.’
‘Yeah, you do.’
‘Okay, yeah, I do. It means she can walk as well as standing still. So versatile!’
‘You’re so judgmental! It’s not very feminist of you, shaming a woman for her career choices.’
Ella sighed. ‘You’re right.’ Why was she being a bitch?
‘Everyone wants the best, don’t they? And when you’re rich and famous, you can get it.’
‘That’s a seriously depressing view of human relations.’ She yawned. Glancing at her watch, she was surprised to see it was almost midnight – way past her bedtime. ‘Well, I think that’s enough life planning for now. I’m going to hit the sack.’
Roly looked up at her as she stood. ‘I’m going to my nan’s for dinner tomorrow with my mum. We have dinner together most Sundays. You’re welcome to come if you want?’
‘Thanks, but I’m going out with my mum and aunt. They’re going away on Wednesday, so it’s sort of a farewell celebration.’
‘Cool.’ He nodded. ‘So we’ll both have one last big blow-out tomorrow and start this new regime on Monday.’