35. Rabbie

35

Rabbie

I’m pacing the living room waiting for Crystal to finish getting ready. The evening of the launch party is here, and I’m a mixture of emotions. It’s bittersweet because this has come to an end but it’s also the start of something new. My business is heading in the right direction and it wouldn’t be possible without the support from everyone in my life, and of course Crystal for creating a beautiful website.

Crystal leaves in two days, and I’m a ball of nerves to ask her to come back. What if she’s changed her mind, and she doesn’t want to? I’m racking my brain on how to approach the situation as Edie circles under my feet. The skin around my nails have been chewed down from the nerves. I’m too entwined in my thoughts that I don’t hear Crystal approach behind me.

“Ahem?” She clears her throat.

I turn around to see her in the most beautiful dress I’ve ever seen. We decided to make the launch party a little formal, it seemed appropriate for the time of year. Crystal’s dress is a deep purple that makes her green eyes pop. The long slit up the side shows off her beautiful legs, and the bodice fits in all the right places. Her long red hair is curled and styled to look effortless. Her make-up is her signature look, winged eyeliner and pink rosy lips. It’s perfect, it’s her. And of course, I didn’t expect anything less, her little cowboy boots peak from underneath her dress.

She doesn’t even need to try, she’s just naturally beautiful. I’m lost for words, when she looks down at her feet and fidgets with the strap of her dress. I close the gap between us and run my hands over her smooth shoulders.

“You’re so beautiful, mo beag.”

Her green eyes pop up to meet mine, and a smile spreads across her lips.

“How did I get so lucky to have someone as smart and beautiful as you?”

Her face blushes and it’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.

“Thank you, you scrub up well yourself. Good job Dylan and I went shopping in Inverness, I didn’t bring anything close to formal with me.” she winks as she straightens my tie.

I’m wearing my kilt tonight, it only seemed right to wear it. The tie feels unusually tight around my neck as I struggle to find the words to tell Crystal how I really feel about her. It’s choking back the words. Edie purrs between our legs, I look down at her and then back at Crystal, and I realise that this is all I need in my life. I’m one hundred percent content with how my life is. I wouldn’t change a thing.

I lean down and kiss Crystal, careful not to smudge her make-up, but she grabs the back of my neck and kisses me harder and with need. The soft hum that escapes her lips vibrates through me and my cock starts to harden. This woman is good at turning me on in a split second. She teases me with a light flick of her tongue, and I’m about to rip off her dress and cancel the party when she breaks the kiss.

“We should get going, we don’t want to be late.”

Oh she knows what she’s doing, and I’m going to get my payback later tonight.

“Oh I see what you’re doing.” I growl at her.

“I don’t know what you mean.” She has a coy smirk on her face.

“Just you wait until I’ve got my head between your legs later tonight, then we’ll see who the tease is.”

Her throat works up and down, as she bites her lip. I run my thumb along her jaw and down her neck. She shivers under my touch, and I find a small amount of pleasure that she gets worked up easily.

I grab her hand and lead her down the stairs and out the backdoor of the cafe. I’m about to lock the door when my mum comes down the back lane. I wasn’t expecting her to come here, we were going to meet at The Drunken Duck. My thoughts immediately jump to the worst and I start to panic.

“Mum, what are you doing here? Is everything okay?”

She scans my face and she smiles softly at me, and then at Crystal.

“You look handsome in your kilt. Crystal you look beautiful too,” she offers us both a compliment.

It does nothing to ease the unsettled pit in my stomach. Crystal gives her a genuine smile, I think it’s the first time that she’s done that.

“Thank you, Susie. You look great.”

My mum looks down at her dress and fiddles with her handbag. “Thank you, it’s been forever since I’ve been able to wear this dress. I’m surprised it still fits.” she laughs nervously.

“You look lovely, mum. Is everything okay?”

“Aye, everything is okay. I wanted to give you this before the party.” She rummages inside her handbag, and she hands me a small little black book.

I run my thumb over the golden embellished words ‘recipes’ on the front. I look up from the book to my mum, my head suddenly flooded with memories of this little recipe book.

“Nan’s recipe book?” I ask, my voice laced with shock.

“Aye, she wrote all her recipes in it when she found out I was pregnant with you and gave it to me. Now it’s time for me to pass it down to you. I’m sorry I never got to teach you the recipes in it.” Her voice is laced with regret.

I see all those years of hurt behind her eyes because she never really got to use them, we never got the sit down family meals. I swallow the lump in my throat as I flick through the pages and see my nan’s elegant writing.

“Thank you, this means a lot.” I give my mum a hug.

I can feel her relax as soon as my arms are around her, and I feel her smile pressing into my chest. I feel Crystal shift next to me, and I realise we’re already running late to the party. I break the embrace with my mum giving her arms a squeeze.

“I’m quickly gonna go put this upstairs, I’ll be back in a sec.”

I give Crystal and my mum a quick smile before I unlock the back door of the cafe and rush upstairs and put the recipe book on my nightstand. I thought my mum threw away that book years ago. Her keeping the book is so sentimental in so many ways. I smile to myself as I make my way back downstairs and outside. I’m barely at the bottom of the stairs before I hear a commotion outside of voices shouting. Panic pricks away at my skin as I rush out the back door to find Crystal shielding my mum behind her. I don’t hear the words being said but, Crystal is standing her ground firm and isn’t taking any shit. My focus is on her, and I don’t even have to look over her to understand what’s going on.

He has the nerve to show his fucking face, and is yelling at the woman I love.

I thought I’d never see my dad again, and even if I did see him again, I never pictured it being like this. I make my way over to my mum and Crystal.

“Back off, you asshole!” Crystal huffs at him.

He looks over her shoulder and spots me walking towards them, the smug grin on his face makes me feel sick.

“Son, get your fucking woman to shut her mouth,” he points at Crystal.

I don’t remember stepping between Crystal and my dad, but the way he spoke about Crystal has me seeing red and a raging inferno is boiling away inside. Years and years I’ve pictured this, picturing what it would be like to see my dad again. I’d wonder if I would feel terrified like I was when I was a wee lad. But as I look at him, I feel nothing but pure hatred and anger. He’s looking a lot older than I remember, the years of alcohol and smoking has finally caught up with him. I stand eye to eye with him, man to man and I try to keep calm.

“You talk about Crystal like that again, and I’ll make you wish that you never stood foot in Crossmackie. And you don’t get the privilege to call me son.” I spit.

Crystal places a hand on my back as she stands next to me, and puffs up her chest to my dad. God, she’s a little firecracker. I can feel my mum shaking behind me, and I hate how much he scares her.

He smirks, and there’s nothing more I want to do than to punch that smug look off his face, but if I sink down to his low level then he’s won.

“You’ve finally grown some balls I see, you were always such a little sissy. Always crying for you mummy, and where was she? She didn’t even want you.”

“That’s not true!” My mum shouts from behind me.

“Shut up bitch, no one asked you!” My dad shouts back.

The slow rage I was feeling before is now uncontrollable and I want to get away from him as quickly as possible. His presence makes me feel sick, and the way he talks to women is making me want to choose violence, but I’m bigger and better than that. If I resort to violence then I’m exactly like him. Usually hearing those words would make me clam up and retreat into myself, but ever since Crystal has walked into my life and shown me my worth, they no longer affect me. Crystal’s hand tenses around mine, and I know the bulldog in her is about to come and bite, but for once it’s me who’s snapping first.

“STOP!” I shout at him, my voice carried with volume making Crystal and my mum jump. I rarely raise my voice, and I hate to think I’m scaring them.

“Your words mean nothing to me. You’re nothing to me. Now, get lost.” I point my chin the direction away from us.

He steps closer, and I don’t move, he doesn’t scare me anymore. He’s similar height to me but I’ve got him by a couple of inches. I don’t think he has the nerve to hit me, but this man has a temper and I don’t want to push him further. I’ve said all that I needed to say to him.

His cold eyes bore into me. “You’re gonna regret this,” he spits on the ground. “Susie, I will get my money,” he tries to peer around me to see my mum but I side step him.

I’m not backing down, I’ll stand here for as long as it takes. He finally backs away from us, and turns on his heel and storms off down the lane and disappears around the corner.

We all collectively let out a breath, and I turn to scan Crystal. She looks just as pissed off at the encounter. I run my hands over her shoulders, and look her over.

“I’m okay, Rab,” she gives me a reassuring smile.

I finally turn to my mum who looks pale and a little shaken, and she has every right to feel that way. Being hunted down by the person who was abusive to you must be terrifying.

“Are you okay mum?” I pull her to me.

She sighs into me, and she stops shaking.

“Aye, I didn’t even see him coming as I had my back turned. Crystal grabbed me in a second and pushed me behind her.”

She breaks the hug, and turns to Crystal and embraces her. Crystal looks stunned at the sudden affection from my mum, but she hugs her back, and smiles over her shoulder at me.

“Thanks, hen. You gave him a good talking to,” she smiled at Crystal.

“He deserves it, the pig.”

I silently laugh at my little firecracker.

“Are you okay?” My mum asks me.

“Aye, I’ve pictured what I would say to him if I ever saw him again, and I meant every word.”

“Well said in my opinion. I hope you don’t believe him. I always wanted you, even if I didn’t show it. Dropping you off at nan’s that day was the most painful day of my life. I never wanted to leave you, I felt like I had no choice. I didn’t want you to be around him any longer,” my mum runs her hand over my cheek.

I smile at her because deep down I’ve always known this, but it’s nice to hear her say it. I’m about to tell her that I believe her, but the moment is interrupted by my phone ringing in my suit pocket, I pull it out to see a few missed calls and texts from the group. Cam is currently calling, I swipe and answer the call.

“Hey, I know it’s a thing to be fashionably late to your own party but everyone has been here for a while. Where are you?” Cam talks over people chatting in the background.

“Aye, sorry. We’re on our way now. I’ll explain when we get there. See you in a sec.”

I end the call, and put it back in my pocket.

“We should get there, it sounds like the party is well under way.”

I double check I locked the back door to the cafe, and we start to walk down the lane towards The Drunken Duck. My dad’s pathetic threat rings in my head, and I try to not worry about it too much. That man has taken away many good things in my life, and I won’t let him ruin an important night. I take a deep breath and try to settle my nerves as we enter The Drunken Duck. As we enter the pub, the whole town cheers, and I see the place filled with so many happy familiar faces. The encounter with my dad quickly fades away as people rush over to greet us. I look around the pub and see that my mum has quietly stepped off to the side. She gives me a reassuring smile, and waves me off to mingle with my friends. I make a mental note to take her over to nan later once I’ve said hello to everyone. Hamish shoves a drink in my hand, and I take a big sip to calm myself.

I scan the pub for my nan and find her tucked away in the corner with Grannie Jo. She raises her glass to me, and I can’t help but smile at the sweet old lady who taught me how to bake. If it wasn’t for her I wouldn’t be where I am today. I raise my glass back towards her, but I’m quickly whisked away to people who want to congratulate me on the launch of the website.

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