Chapter 10 Ben
BEN
‘This looks cool, Big T!’ I said to Theo as I looked around one of the studio flats on the library’s top floor.
It was Sunday and as it was the only day that the library was closed, it was also when the workmen did all the noisiest stuff to avoid disturbing the members downstairs.
‘Glad you like it!’ Theo said. ‘There’s still some plumbing to do in the bathroom and kitchen, but it’s progressing well.’
‘What will you do with the other flats?’ I asked.
‘Jane and Jackson will be renting one, but don’t say anything yet. Jackson’s going to surprise Jane when they go away next month.’
‘My lips are sealed!’ I said as I walked towards the window. The flats overlooked the back of the library’s grounds as the opposite side of the building had sea views, which Theo had reserved for creating the book bar. ‘When do you think I can move in?’
‘Hopefully in a few weeks. We’re using most of the manpower on the bar. I’m glad we decided to incorporate it on this floor with a terrace instead of building it on the roof.’
‘That would’ve been expensive.’
‘Exactly. But there’s still a lot to do with that and the retreat, so no offence, this flat is the lowest priority.’
‘My eardrums say otherwise!’ I laughed. ‘Seriously, bro, I know it’s your place, but when you and Jess are going to pull an all-nighter, I’d be grateful if you could give me a heads-up.
Even when I put on headphones I can still hear you two.
It’s extremely uncomfortable to listen to your own brother going at it and I’m finding it very difficult to look Jess in the eye too. ’
Theo smirked.
It wasn’t just the sex. It was their general gushiness.
At home, Jess and Theo held hands. All the time.
When they were curled up together watching TV on the sofa.
When they walked home from the library.
I’d even seen them holding hands in the kitchen.
It was ridiculous.
And when they weren’t holding hands, they were kissing or ‘making love’.
Theo used to be a love ’em and leave ’em kind of guy like me, but not anymore. Jess was great, but my brother had been totally pussy-whipped.
That’d never be me.
‘Sorry, not sorry,’ Theo chuckled. ‘Having a healthy sex life is a good thing.’
‘No wonder you’re always smiling.’
‘What can I say? I’m in love.’ He grinned like an idiot.
‘I’m happy for you,’ I said. And I meant it.
Just because the whole fairy-tale ending thing wasn’t for me didn’t mean I couldn’t see how it’d benefitted my brother.
‘Thanks. Do you really not want that? To have a partner to share your life with?’ Theo asked.
‘C’mon, bro. This is me you’re talking to!’ I laughed. ‘I’m Big Ben. There’s too many women in the world to enjoy. Why would I want to limit myself to just one?’ I walked to a window and started fiddling with the handle. ‘This feels a bit loose.’
‘Don’t change the subject.’ Theo stood beside me and softened his voice.
‘I know you were hurt, but trying to sleep your way through the entire female population won’t help.
You’ll just end up feeling disillusioned and numb.
And don’t put that bullshit Big Ben bravado stuff on me, I know it’s all a front. ’
‘It’s not! That’s who I am!’ I protested.
‘That’s crap and you know it,’ Theo countered. ‘Just think about it. And in the meantime, remember what I said. Don’t mess around with anyone at the library.’
‘That’s a bit hypocritical, isn’t it? You’re with Jess and Jackson’s with Jane.’
‘We’re both in committed relationships, so it’s different. Why? Is there someone on the team you’re interested in dating, seriously? Like Sarah, for example?’ He arched his brow.
‘No way,’ I scoffed. ‘She hates my guts.’
‘I wouldn’t be too sure about that,’ Theo said.
‘Why?’ I stood up straighter. ‘What have you heard?’
I knew I said I wouldn’t go there and I still stood by that. But it was like every time I saw her, she got more attractive.
Sarah had some great ideas for the retreat and bar and I liked how she said exactly what was on her mind and didn’t care what other people thought of her.
And she was going to be a successful writer. I hadn’t read her book yet and I didn’t know why, but something just told me it would be great.
Christ.
What the fuck was wrong with me?
The construction dust must’ve gone to my head.
‘Nothing. Other than the fact that she doesn’t like working with you.’
‘See?’ I said, trying to ignore the punch in my gut. ‘Like I said, she hates me.’
I knew that I wasn’t Sarah’s favourite person and initially, I got off on that. But knowing that she was still saying that after we’d worked together all week and I’d acted more professionally affected me more than it should’ve.
I shouldn’t be surprised, though. I was always going to be the guy that women liked to look at but didn’t want to spend time with unless it was for a bit of fun.
‘Maybe. Maybe not,’ Theo said. ‘She just doesn’t know you yet.
The point is, don’t pull any of your antics on the women here.
Things happened with me and Jess before the library opened.
And Jane and Jackson knew each other long before they worked together.
We can’t afford for the library to become a graveyard filled with women you’ve fucked, then left heartbroken. It’s poor form and bad for business.’
‘Message received, loud and clear. No shagging romance readers or library workers. Got it.’ I saluted.
It wouldn’t be a problem. I had no intention of doing anything with the members. When they tried to give me their numbers or ask me out, I always politely declined.
And as for Sarah, like I said, she wasn’t interested. Even if she was, I wouldn’t take it further. She’d want the whole fairy tale like Jess and Jane had, and I wasn’t getting sucked into that bullshit again.