17. Unexpected
17
Unexpected
WINTER
“Guys? W-What are you doing here?” I ask, overwhelmed with emotions. I haven’t seen them in so long. Especially Kass and Alex, whom I haven’t seen in person since I left Maria’s house at the beginning of the summer. Kass and I have been texting here and there, but she’s been busy with law school. As for Alex, I only kept in touch with him through Kendrick.
“I heard from a little birdie that my girl’s going through a rough time.” Kass opens her arms for me, and I walk right into her embrace, already a mess.
“I can’t believe you’re all here. How did you…” I’m at a loss for words.
“It was her idea.” Kendrick nudges Allie.
“No way? You set this all up?”
“Well, you kept on saying how much you missed your family, and I thought it was about time I met my boyfriend’s friends. I reached out a few weeks ago, and they were all free around the same time, so I convinced them to come and, well, here we are.”
“Al, you’re insane.” I hug her, and she laughs.
Will’s eyes widen. “Wait. Did she just say boyfriend?” His gaze sways between Allie and Kendrick. “As in you two?”
Kendrick nods. “You missed a lot, man.”
Words fail to describe how happy I feel when Kendrick and Will bro hug the way they used to.
I’m so glad they made peace.
Last I heard, they hadn’t talked all summer. I have no idea what happened for them to reunite but…
Wait, Kass is here.
Isn’t that weird for them? Unless they’re together again and Kendrick finally got over himself? They sure as hell don’t seem together standing as far away from each other as humanly possible.
“So… You just happened to invite them exactly when I’m having a mental breakdown?” I ask.
“Oh Lord, what’s the idiot done this time?” Will pulls me into a hug. Alex is next in line.
“Are you familiar with this?” Allie chuckles. “I can barely keep up with those two.”
“Familiar?” Alex scoffs.
“Please, we’ve seen this a million times,” Will laughs. “Here’s how it goes: Haze does something stupid, Winter leaves his ass, he realizes what he’s done, tries to win her back, and she makes it hard on him until she eventually gives in and comes crawling back into his arms.”
“Gee, thanks, guys.” I roll my eyes, and they laugh.
“Let’s just say we know better than to bet against Haze and Winter by now.” Kass loops our arms together and rests her head on my shoulder. I missed her. I missed all of them.
Will spots my untouched Chinese food. “Hey, whose food is that?”
“Winter’s,” Allie says.
“Are you going to eat that?” he asks, but before I can reply, the box is in his hands and his mouth is full.
“Actually, I haven’t eaten in two days and I’m starving, but help yourself, you pig.”
“I’ll leave you some.” He smirks. “Maybe.”
Charming.
“Answers, please. Why did you break up?” Will insists.
Anxiety rushes through me at the mere thought of reliving my birthday party all over again. Allie catches on immediately.
“Nope!” She sticks her finger in the air. “Today, we don’t talk about him. We don’t mention his name. Haze Adams doesn’t exist. No, you know what, let’s spice it up. For every time Winter talks about Haze in any way, she’ll have to take a shot tonight when we go out, how about that?”
They all agree, happily taking part in my future misery. I wish I could say that they’re wrong. Confidently state that I can resist talking about him for the rest of the day, but that would be a big, fat lie.
After all, breaking the rules is what got me in this mess in the first place…
“Don’t you all just love shopping?” Allie smiles, bags upon bags of new clothes dangling off her arms.
“I fell asleep three times during that sentence,” Kendrick says, making Will and Alex laugh. After my unexpected guests settled in, Allie decided we weren’t staying inside the entire day and dragged us out to the mall. We’ve been here for two hours tops, and the girls have already spent around two hundred dollars each.
Kendrick and Allie said they’d sleep at Allie’s place to leave the two guest rooms to Kass and the guys. Will still had to take the couch, but I’m sure he’ll manage. They’re not staying for long. A few days at most.
I wonder what Haze is doing.
If he’s as miserable as I am.
Man, if I had to take a shot every time I think about him, I’d be throwing up in the water fountain by now. As for talking about him, I’m already at three shots. I tried. I really did. But I can’t help it. Everything I see reminds me of him.
“I can actually hear you thinking about him.” Allie elbows me jokingly. “Is this guy really all you can think about?”
Yes.
“No. Of course not.”
“Why did we agree to come to Canada again?” Will whines.
“Because you love me.” I shoot him a smile.
Will gasps. “Oh my God.”
I frown. “What?”
“She smiles.”
I give out a quiet laugh. He’s right. I’ve had a scowl stuck to my face since this morning. But their visit really turned my mood around. When we pass a video game store, the guys say their goodbyes and enter the only store in the entire mall they’re actually interested in. I seize the opportunity when we lose them into the crowd.
I turn to Kass. “Okay, mind telling me what the hell happened between you and Will?”
“What do you mean?” She plays dumb.
“Please, I barely know you guys, and even I feel the sexual tension,” Allie remarks.
“What happened when he went back to you after he left that first week? Did you ever get back togeth—”
“Wait.” She cuts me off. “He left the first week?”
“Well, yeah. He was a mess the whole time. Then he just packed his things one morning and took off.”
Color spills from her features. “I… You mean to tell me he was back in Florida all summer?”
Crap. Maybe I should’ve kept my mouth shut.
“I mean, I’m not sure. He just said he had to go back home. He and Kendrick got into a huge fight. He didn’t go back to you?”
She traps her lip between her teeth, pain flashing in her gaze. “No, he didn’t. Today’s the first time I’ve seen him since he left with Kendrick four months ago.”
What the hell?
“But he was such a wreck over you. I could’ve sworn—”
“It doesn’t matter. It’s over.” She shuts me out. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
I’m about to fight her on this, to try and piece back their relationship together, but composure depletes from my body when I stare ahead of me.
My heart breaks all over again.
Haze.
He just walked out of a jewelry store, holding a small see-through bag. In a perfect world, he’d walk in the opposite direction, turn away, and never notice me. But in this one?
He heads right toward us.
One second is enough. He gives us a quick, careless glance. Then his eyes widen as if the information just registered.
Right away, he does a double take.
My gaze collides with the iciest blue eyes I’ve ever known, and the feelings I’ve been repressing infiltrate my cracked heart.
“Shit, is that Haze?” Kass comes in late to the party.
Both Kass and Allie grab my arm and begin dragging me in the opposite direction. But I know it’s pointless. That’s Haze we’re talking about. He saw me. He isn’t about to just let me run off. As predicted, he sprints over to me in record time. Dark circles rim his eyes. He looks exhausted. I flinch under his gaze and stare at my feet.
“Hey,” he says, almost in a whisper.
“Hey? That’s all you have to say. Hey?” Allie gets all up in his face like an overprotective watchdog.
“Five minutes, that’s all I want,” he begs, and I pray that Allie won’t fall for it. I know that she likes him. If it were up to her, we’d be together forever and have a thousand babies.
Allie’s eyes ask if I’m okay with talking to him. Am I? I don’t know. Part of me wants to run to him, hide into his arms, forget any of this happened. But the other… the other is crumbling when he stands this close to me.
Succumbing to the pressure, I nod.
“You have one minute,” Allie says before dragging Kass two steps away to listen.
Silence.
My eyes remain fixated on the ground.
“Winter, look at me.”
I draw a sharp breath and oblige. Looking into his eyes makes it all that much worse. Pain slices through my beating heart like butter. Like it was meant to be there. Likeitwas meant to destroy me.
“I’ve been calling,” he starts.
“I know.”
“Texting, too.”
“I know.”
“Winter, please…” He steps forward, which results in me stepping back so fast you’d think I was trained. I’m acting like a hurt puppy. Untrusting, terrified to suffer again.
“Don’t,” I warn. The closer he gets, the harder it is for me to keep it together.
“I’m so, so sorry. If you would just let me explain… I miss you. So much. I’m losing my fucking mind here. Please let me come home so we can talk about this.”
I snap. “Talk about what? The fact that you’ve been lying to me for months? The fact that you made me believe you loved me so much you’d leave your entire life behind for me, when, all this time… You were just… choosing your revenge over me?”
“I didn’t choose my revenge over you. I know that’s what it looks like, but—”
“It doesn’t just look like it. That’s what happened.”
“I didn’t choose. I could never choose.” He steps forward, and this time, I let him. “I guess I just thought I could have both. And I know it sounds fucked-up. I know I’m a fucking disaster, but I’m a disaster who loves you. Don’t ever doubt that.”
I can feel the tears amass in my eyes. Not now . I was fine barely a second ago, but seeing him in front of me, hearing his voice, getting wrapped up in his scent, it leaves me defenseless . This is exactly why I didn’t want to see him.
“I should’ve told you why I couldn’t go with you the first time. I should’ve told you that the second I found him I’d be on the first plane back to you.”
“No, it’s okay. I hope you find him, I really do. I want him to pay for what he did. I hope you get justice for your sister.”
He stares at me, dreading what’s coming.
“But?”
“I just hope he’s worth it.”
Pain ripples through him, but I don’t let myself watch a second longer, terrified that every second near him is a second closer to my undoing. I tear my eyes away, turn on my heels, and walk back to the girls.
Twelve. Twelve times. I’ve broken the “no Haze” rule twelve times in less than five hours. Even after the random encounter with him at the mall, I told myself I’d keep the Haze talk to a minimum. Did it stop me from bawling like an actual baby and telling the girls all about him the second we came home? Nope. Luckily for me, the guys stayed at the mall longer than we did, which earned my liver a chance in hell at surviving tonight.
Sitting on my bed, I wait patiently for Kass to finish straightening my hair while Allie hypes me up. I know she means well, but I can recognize a pity compliment when I see one. The boys are playing video games in the living room. I’m sure Kass was glad to get away from Will—even if it’s just one room away. Being in Will’s presence seems to soak up every drop of happiness from her body. I think she still has feelings for him, although she’d rather die than admit it.
I smile at Waze, who’s sleeping peacefully at the end of the bed. In the past few days, he’s made me so happy, yet so unbelievably sad. I feel awful about it. It’s not his fault. He’s perfect, but everything about him reminds me of Haze. I mean, his name literally represents our entire relationship for God’s sake.
Bringing the glass of wine in my hands to my lips, I stare blankly at the wall.
I hate red wine.
But it tastes better than my tears.
Wow, that was really dark.
“What do you think was in the bag?” Kass works the last piece of my hair.
“I don’t know. An engagement ring maybe?” Allie suggests.
“He wouldn’t dare propose just to get her back, would he?” Kass asks.
“I don’t know. Not that it would work if he did. Hey, Winter, I’m sorry I lied to you for months, but would you marry me? For real this time?” Allie scoffs. “I mean, the guy’s not that stupid, is he?”
“I beg to differ.”
My eyes jump to Kendrick standing in the doorway. We didn’t hear him come in.
Allie smiles at him. “Hey, you.”
“Are you guys ready yet?”
“Five minutes,” Allie promises.
Forty-five minutes later, we’re ready.
Stepping into a cab, we find ourselves heading for the trendiest club in town. I’m not a club kind of girl. Never have been, never will be. But tonight, I’m willing to give it a try.
I assess the overcrowded nightclub in front of me. You can practically feel the bass vibrating from outside. Girls wearing short dresses parade in and out of the building, and I look down at my outfit. Allie and Kass got me all dressed up, but I’m wearing a big-ass coat and a scarf on top of my outfit. I don’t care that we’re clubbing. I’m not catching pneumonia tonight.
I hear the guys discuss the legal drinking age being nineteen here instead of twenty-one.
They’re thinking numbers.
I am, too.
The final number is fourteen.
Fourteen chances to forget him.