29. Jason Kingsley
Chapter twenty-nine
Jason Kingsley
Willow grips my shirt and pulls me down to her. My mind hasn’t had time to process her words, but my body catches up quickly. I thread one hand into her hair and settle the other on the perfect curve of her waist as our lips meet.
This kiss is much different than our first. That was a faint brush of the lips, a fleeting moment like a shooting star burning a trail of hope across my heart. But this kiss? It feels like a promise of a future. As constant as gravity or the sun rising over my pasture. I don’t have to worry about it slipping through my fingertips.
The knowledge doesn’t quench my desire though. It prods the flames into a blazing hot inferno of pure want. I walk Willow backward until her back hits a wall, and I cage her in. She pulls me closer by my shirt, as if she can’t get close enough. Her mouth is sweet and warm and addicting. I deepen the kiss, relishing the taste of her. A soft sound emanates from the back of her throat when my thumb slips under the hem of her sweater. My new goal is to hear that sound again and again.
Pulling back from the kiss, I trail my lips up her jaw to her neck before tasting the spot behind her ear.
“ Jase .” She gasps, and I can’t help the satisfied smirk that stretches across my lips.
“I love that nickname,” I murmur against her skin. “I love it even more when you say it like that.”
I drag my teeth gently over her earlobe, heat pooling deep in my abdomen when she makes another one of those little moans. She’s so perfect. I pull back slightly so I can really look at her. Her beautiful gray eyes are closed and her petal pink lips are parted in anticipation. I trace her bottom lip with my thumb. My desire gives way to reverence. How could I possibly be worthy of her? I press a kiss to each of her cheekbones, her forehead, her eyelids. She stays as still as a statue, letting me shower her with the adoration she deserves.
I brush my lips against hers ever so softly. “I love you, too, Lo,” I rasp.
Her eyes flutter open, revealing the powder gray irises I could stare into forever.
“That’s why I was so upset when I found out about our first meeting. I love you so much that the idea of hurting you broke me. I hadn’t even admitted to myself that I loved you, but I know I’ve been falling for some time now.” The corner of my mouth tugs up into a wry grin. “Probably before I was supposed to be falling.”
Willow lets out a breathy laugh. “I wasn’t as immune to your charms as I thought either.” Her fingertips toy with the collar of my shirt as she looks up at me through dark lashes. “You’re easy to love, Jason. It was more work trying not to fall for you. Once I finally let myself, I was hopeless to do anything but love you.”
My throat grows tight with emotion. I press my forehead to hers and close my eyes.
“I know our wedding was supposed to be the happiest moment of my life, but this might beat it,” I whisper.
She gives me a gentle kiss and I can feel her smiling. “I think we have a lot more happiest days on the horizon.”
“I think so too.”
“Can I ask what might be a strange question?” Willow breaks the silence we’ve been sitting in.
I brought her out to the cliff on the four-wheeler again. We ordered Chinese food takeout, and now she’s sitting between my legs, leaning against my chest as we watch the sun set. It’s the most peaceful I’ve felt in a long time, maybe ever.
“Ask away,” I say as I brush her silky hair away and press a kiss where her neck and shoulder meet.
“I can’t focus while you’re doing that,” she breathes.
I smirk and kiss her there again. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“If I have to move, I will,” she warns, but I can tell she’s bluffing. She’s fully relaxed in my arms, a fact that has me elated.
“Just ask your question, Mrs. Kingsley,” I say against her skin.
She draws in a breath. “That’s a part of what I want to ask. I know we’re married, but…what exactly are we doing now that our feelings have changed?”
I smile. While mine have certainly grown, I was more ready to marry her than she knows.
“Now, I get to date my wife.” I wrap her up in my arms and kiss her temple. “We can go slow. I don’t expect us to have a real marriage right away. I know it’ll take time.”
She toys with my left hand, twisting the gold ring around my finger.
“But you want a real marriage?”
“Of course I do. Do you?”
“Yes,” she whispers. “It scares me because we aren’t exactly going about things in the traditional way, but I want to be your wife.”
“Good, because I love being your husband.”
She falls silent again, but I can sense she’s holding back.
“Tell me what’s weighing on that beautiful mind of yours,” I urge her.
She continues fidgeting with my ring. “I don’t know how to ask this, but what are your expectations now that we’re dating and married?”
I frown. “I’m not sure I understand what you’re asking.”
“I guess I’m asking about–um–sleeping arrangements.” My eyes widen at her words. “And things of that nature.”
I pause for a second before speaking, not wanting to get this wrong. It’s too important to risk miscommunication. “You’re welcome to sleep in my bed whenever you want. I hope one day it’ll be seen as ours.” I pause, swallowing as I recall our kiss from earlier. “As far as more than that goes, I don’t expect anything of you. I just want that moment to be when the both of us are ready, and not a moment sooner.”
“Okay,” she whispers. “When we’re ready.”
“I do want to say that not much else has changed, though. What’s mine is still yours. I won’t let you carry any of your bags,” I joke and she giggles.
“I suppose I can agree to that.” She turns her head and meets my gaze. “I keep feeling like there’s no way this can be real. I never would have thought things would turn out this way.”
“Such little confidence,” I tease and she rolls her eyes. I place a hand on her cheek and she leans into my touch. “I know what you mean. Every day with you is a dream I never want to wake up from.”
Her cheeks tint pink. “I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to you saying things like that.”
“You don’t have to. Just know that I’m never going to stop, and that I mean every word.” I give her a feathered kiss.
“Even the most ridiculous compliments?” she questions, a playful smile dancing on her lips.
“ Especially those.”
I pepper her neck with kisses and she laughs, trying to move away but failing because I have her wrapped up. Eventually I stop, and she relaxes in my arms again with a contented sigh.
The sun is behind the tree line now, and the temperature is quickly dropping
“Why don’t we head back home before it gets too cold? We can watch a movie on the couch,” I suggest against her ear.
She turns in my arms so that she’s on her knees between my legs. Her hands slide behind my neck, toying with the hair at the nape of my neck in a way that drives me mad.
“If by watch a movie you mean have it on in the background…then I’m good with that plan.” Her voice is low with a sultry tone that heats my blood.
“Whatever would make you happiest, Mrs. Kingsley.”
“You,” she whispers. “You are what makes me the happiest.”
Her hands rest on my face, soft and cold from the chilly autumn air. I look into her eyes and lose myself in their luminous silver depths. She dips her head and presses her lips to mine in a long, passionate kiss that renders me breathless when she pulls away. Our eyes meet again, hers having taken on a dazed look that fills me with a deep-seated satisfaction. She’s going to make taking things slow difficult, but the wait will be worth it. If her kiss lights my every nerve, I can only imagine what sharing something more intimate will be like.
All I know is I want to experience not just that, but so much more with her. I want to know everything about her, explore every inch of her mind, body, and soul. To have a connection that no one else does and know what she’s thinking just by meeting her eyes across the room. That kind of intimacy is what I've craved for so long, and the idea that I get to have it with someone as utterly perfect as Willow is mind-boggling.
She smiles at me, a slow and seductive one that makes my heart pound. Fear of losing her, of messing it all up, tries to creep in, but another kiss from Willow pushes it away. I won’t mess this up. I’ll do everything in my power to stay true to my vows, both the ones I said and the ones I wrote down. Whatever it takes, I’m holding on to my wife now and forever.