24. Matteo
Chapter 24
Matteo
I stared at the closed elevator door for what felt like hours. I knew I needed to go back to the kitchen and finish up what I was cooking. If I didn’t, the dish would go bad. I knew it, but I just stood there staring at the door.
Maybe I thought the elevators would slide open and she would be there. Maybe it was hope that glued my feet to the ground. Hope made me wait for her but pride made me unable to go after her.
After all the things she said to me, I had no desire to bring her back to my house. At least that was what I told myself. I tried to make myself believe that I didn’t want her here but that wasn’t true.
When I finally left the living room, it felt like there was a heavy weight on my shoulder. It weighed me down, making my steps to the kitchen more labored. In the empty house, my labored steps were louder. The sound made me conscious of the fact that I was alone. Amelia left and she probably wouldn’t come back here ever again.
I lost her. Again.
I finished up in the kitchen, but I couldn’t bring myself to eat the food that we were supposed to eat together. So instead, I packed everything into the freezer and cleaned up. When I was done, I sat at the kitchen counter and stared ahead at nothing in particular.
I could hear the echoes of my argument with Amelia. It flooded my mind, forcing me to relive it.
And all for what? Money? I thought you were better than that.
You killed what we had, Matteo.
You killed it first when you chose your parents over me.
That was the last thing I said to her before she left. I didn’t go after her when she packed her suitcase. Only when I heard the elevator ding did I leave the kitchen. I saw her standing in the elevator but I couldn’t go after her, not after everything she said.
I sighed as I pulled myself off the stool. I was on my way to my study when I heard the elevator. For a moment, I thought it was my mind playing tricks on me. Amelia couldn’t possibly have come back. I walked to the living room with doubtful steps.
The elevator doors slid open and Agnes stepped out. I hadn’t expected to see her today. I tried to hide my disappointment at seeing her and not Amelia but she picked up on it. “Were you expecting someone else?” she asked.
“No, of course not.”
“Where’s Miss Amelia?” She stepped into the living room and looked around.
“She left.”
“When will she be back? I have something to—
I cut her off before she could finish. “She’s not coming back. She left for good.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean Amelia packed a bag and left,” I said.
Agnes narrowed her eyes. I knew that look. It was the look she gave me when she was about to chastise me for something. She rarely used it but sometimes, it made an appearance. “What did you do to her?”
I scoffed. “What did I do to her? Did it ever occur to you that I may be the offended party here?”
“That doesn’t mean you can’t apologize.”
“I have no reason to do so.” I turned to walk away but her next words made me pause.
“I mean no disrespect, sir, but I must tell you that you would be a fool to let that woman go,” she said.
I turned to look at her but she’d already walked off in the opposite direction.
In the days that followed Amelia’s departure, Agnes had taken to expressing her opinion quite often. She took great pains to inform me about what she believed I would be losing by letting Amelia go. I’d learned to tune her out whenever we were in a room together. Growing up with my grandmother meant I knew all about ignoring lectures from women far older than me.
Agnes’ lectures were a constant reminder of Amelia. Not that I needed one. She was always on my mind. Working provided a great escape from everything. Unfortunately, thoughts of Amelia always followed me there too. I thought about her so much that I could barely concentrate on my work.
“Mr. Hayes?”
I blinked at the man in front of me. Then I looked around the room full of people. I was in a meeting. My team and I were discussing how to move forward with the Fitzroy Corp issue. It had recently come out that Alberto Fitzroy was involved in something shady and that was how he obtained the money required to partner with Ryx Cement.
Fitzroy Corp was doing poorly as expected. Unexpectedly, Ryx Cement was also suffering by association. Some of my employees believed I should step in and stick my neck out of Ryx Cement. Others believed we should simply focus on our four other suppliers and let Ryx Cement face this mess alone. It was too much of a risk to put our necks on the line.
We were casting our votes about the best way forward when I zoned out. I was facing a major company decision but I was still thinking about Amelia. I pushed thoughts of her aside and focused on the matter at hand.
They’d all cast their votes but at the end of the day, mine was the deciding vote. I thought of Ryx Cement and its owner, Benedict Randolph. He was one of the people who took a chance on me when I was just starting out. He’d vouched for me and helped me get into rooms I could only dream of entering. He’d been an integral part of my success. My answer was obvious.
I would gladly vouch for Ryx Cement.
***
My grandmother’s visit was unexpected. It wasn’t like her to come back to New York so soon after leaving. I wasn’t complaining though. I cherished every moment I got to spend with her. She’d been in my life for as long as I could remember. And while I loved to see her happily traveling the world, there were days when I missed sitting in the house with her on a lazy Sunday afternoon.
She walked into my office with a large smile on her face. I tried to return it but mine came off tight and forced. She knew me well enough to know something was wrong.
“What happened?” she asked as she walked over to the couch. She took a seat and patted the spot next to her.
I felt like a child who’d just had a bad day at school and was being implored by his mother to tell her about it. Nevertheless, I went. I took a seat beside her and sighed. “Amelia is gone.” I chose not to beat around the bush. She would find out eventually. “We had a fight and she left.”
“When was this?”
“A few days ago.”
My grandmother nodded. “And when do you plan to go after her?”
“I’m not going to do that.”
“Really? So, you’re willing to lose the woman you love for the second time?” she asked.
She didn’t say much after that. She simply left me to stew in the weight of her question. It remained a constant burden for the rest of the day. When I finally left the office, Eddie was waiting downstairs. He’d never given an opinion about my life before, but I could tell from the look on his face that he also didn’t think I should let Amelia go.
“Any stops on the way home sir?” he would ask.
What he was really asking was if I planned to pick Amelia up from her office. I always told him no and he always responded with a curt nod and a deep frown. From Agnes to my grandmother to Eddie, everyone seemed to think I was making a huge mistake.
As I lay in bed that night staring at the ceiling above me, I thought about Amelia and all we’d been through. It had been a difficult ride but somehow, we managed to make it back to each other.
Was I willing to lose the woman I loved for the second time? My grandmother’s question echoed in my head.
It was easy for her to tell that I loved Amelia. Probably because I’d never stopped loving her. I loved her even when I hated her. I loved her even when she broke my heart. Loving her came as naturally to me as breathing.
I hadn’t fought for Amelia the first time we split up. Back then, she’d obeyed her parents’ wishes because it was all she’d ever done. She was completely dependent on them, and she couldn’t imagine a world where she didn’t do exactly what they told her to. I should have understood that. I should have fought for her on the days when she couldn’t fight for herself.
I sat up in bed and ran a hand through my hair. What was I doing? I couldn’t let Amelia go again without a fight. She mattered too much to me. I couldn’t give up on her so easily. I loved too much to let things end simply because of an argument. It didn’t matter who was right and who was wrong. All that mattered was that I loved her.
It was time to put my pride aside and go after her.
The next day, I called Eddie and told him not to come to work. Then I drove straight to Phoenix Consulting. It was still early when I got there. Only a few employees had arrived. I stayed in my car as I waited for Amelia.
It didn’t take long before I saw her step out of the cab. I went after her, my feet carrying me at a faster pace than usual. I realized that I missed her. My hands ached to touch her. My body ached to feel her against me.
Amelia turned around just as I reached her side. Shock flashed over her face before her features settled into displeasure. Time stretched out before us as we stared at each other. A small breeze pushed a strand of her hair into her face. I was tempted to lift my hand and brush it aside, but I put my hands in my pockets instead. This wasn’t the time to touch her. We still had many hurdles to cross before she would let me into her life like that again.
“What are you doing here?” she asked as she tucked the strand behind her ear.
“We need to talk.”
She shook her head. “We have nothing to talk about, Matteo.”
“Yes, we do. We need to talk about us and how—”
“You… We said everything we needed to say that day in your kitchen. There’s nothing left to say.”
Amelia turned to leave and despite myself, I reached out to hold her. I pulled her into my arms. Her eyes widened when her chest slammed against my own. I lowered my head to claim her lips because I couldn’t stop myself anymore.
She kissed me back but only for a few seconds. Then she pushed me away and ran into the office. I stared up at the sky, sighed, and closed my eyes. I’d truly lost her for good this time. It hurt to even think that way, but it was clear I had let her go.
There was no hope for us.