Sterling #2
“You’re doing so well, big girl! Give me one more!
” Despite how little she was tummy time was even more crucial for Ami.
I’d gone over her medical records and spoken with the nurses.
She’d been in the NICU as a precaution but she had development issues with her lungs.
Nothing that was severe, but they were still monitoring it.
The newborn appointments that we’d had with her doctors hadn’t alerted us to anything being wrong.
I wasn’t a doctor but with my experience I was keeping my eye out for any potential delays.
But judging by how well she was battling to lift her little head up, Ami had apparently inherited her athleticism from her father.
“You got a second?”
I was startled only briefly by the sound of his voice and I didn’t bother to turn around.
With Ami not being secure, she could roll over on accident or struggle to keep her head up.
The little mat beneath her was soft, a hot pink floral creation that wouldn’t hurt her if her head dropped.
A baby hitting their head this young could still cause issues so I made sure Ami was good.
“I work for you so I’m at your disposal.” I tried to keep my voice neutral but I sounded cold even to myself. I refused to look at him but I could hear him shuffling his feet as though he was uncomfortable.
Good.
“You’re still a fucking human being with free will.
I can understand if you don’t feel like dealing with me and my shit after what went down.
” He was tap-dancing around an apology but that was still some bullshit.
Like he wanted me to fill in the blanks of his remorse and I might be a doormat with some things, but not my damn respect.
Instead of doing the emotional labor for him I simply shrugged. My shoulders and attempted to sound as unbothered as possible. “It’s not my place to judge you so forget it happened. I overstepped and it won’t happen again.”
He chuckled softly behind me and I had to battle turning to look at him. “That didn’t sound like an apology.”
My brows rose and I was staring at Ami as her head bobbed again because he really had me fucked up. “An apology is only for when you feel sorry for something you said or did, I don’t.”
“Damn is it like that?”
“I don’t lie. I tried to help but you didn’t appreciate it.
That I’m sorry for.” And I meant that shit.
It was clear that he needed help that was far outside anything my friendship would be able to provide him.
Since I’d already spent my hard-earned money in therapy for years, he could damn sure do the work on himself.
He walked closer to me his steps stopping a few feet away.
Stubbornly, I kept my eyes on Ami. “Nah, I’m the one who’s sorry.
I didn’t need to come at you like that because I have heavy stuff going on.
You have been a lifesaver, and my mama and Billy would beat my ass for how I spoke to you yesterday.
I would never call you out of your name in my right mind but that’s still no excuse.
I’m so sorry, Sterling. There isn’t anything I can do to undo the damage but I promise I’ll try. ”
“I’m not the person who really needs you to do better, Aldrich.” He wasn’t about to soften me up with his words no matter how much I appreciated them. Wasn’t gonna change the hurt but at least he was owning up to it.
“I feel you and I’m working on it I promise.” Aldrich’s voice was heavy and he sighed after he got done speaking. My heart clenched but I wasn’t about to give him any leeway.
“Okay.”
“I can’t even get you to look at me?” I knew manipulation and his voice had genuine hurt in it but there wasn’t anything I was going to do to help him. He needed to figure that out on his own.
“Your daughter needs my attention more than you need me to look at you to lessen your guilt.”
He sighed again and despite him not liking my response I hoped he was going to drop the issue. “That’s some real shit. I didn’t want to hold you up but I am sorry and I’m taking that advice you gave me to heart.”
“Good. It can only make things better for you and her in the long run.” Ami was cooing toward him and she lifted her head up at him and smiled.
“Look at her!” Aldrich finally walked over into my line of sight and rubbed her back with a grin on his face.
His hair was damp and brushed back into a ponytail off of his face.
The team workout gear he always wore was again on his frame and he looked good as hell with his cutoff shirt on and his massive tattooed arms on display.
Girl, focus.
“You speak the truth. I won’t hold you, though.
I just didn’t want shit between us to be awkward and let that linger.
You deserve better than that.” Aldrich kept one hand braced on Ami and I couldn’t tell if it was support for him or for her.
His eyes looked remorseful and I hated that he was going through so many changes but I couldn’t be the one he used to exorcise his demons.
That would only destroy the working relationship we had and create a hostile work environment.
I could only give him a small smile and saw the pain that still lingered in his eyes. He looked tired and I wasn’t sure where he was going today, but I prayed he wouldn’t do anything stupid.
“Thank you for that. Take care of yourself.”