Chapter 44
Bear
"Is this… is this what people do on their honeymoon?" Pen asks.
I have her at the edge of the bed, legs wide open for me. The look of pleasure on her face drives me wild. It pushes me to fuck her hard. I'm thrusting so deep, so fast, her head wobbles on the bed, back and forth just like her breasts.
We've been at the campground for just over a week. She's given herself to this with me. I'm giving myself to this with her, too. No matter what my heart screams at me now that it's out of its cell.
I grind my teeth. "Fuck. Yes."
"We were missing out," she says as if in a daze.
I put a foot by her waist, gaining leverage to fill her up with my cock. She whines and wraps a hand on my calf. Her nails dig into my skin. I hiss. She cups her breast with her free hand and plays with her nipple.
"That's right," I growl. "Touch yourself. Be rough. You know how I'd play you with my mouth."
It's been days of what seems like endless sex. She tells me she's starved, and I tell her I'll feed her. She tells me she wants me to use her, and I do.
And I fight with my heart. It's a battle to the death.
I press my cock into her. I can't go any deeper without hurting her, so I'm careful.
I wrap the visible part of my shaft in two fingers and my thumb, like a cock ring that shows me exactly how deep I can go safely.
I move back and forth. Short pumps at first. With each of her moans, I give her longer thrusts.
I take her leg and make her twist at the waist, until I can hold her knee under my foot on the bed. This makes her tighter around me and I see white.
"Oh my God!" she exclaims.
"Louder."
"Leon!"
I let loose. I pummel into her, using my fingers around my shaft as a safeguard, and my knuckles as a punishment.
"I've never… I just…" she tries.
"Should I stop?"
"No!"
"Louder, Pen."
"No! Don't stop!"
Never letting go of myself with one hand, I use the other to insert a finger in her. She whines.
The window wall behind me is wide open. We could have pressed a button and made it opaque, or closed the two sets of curtains, but we didn't. The view is too nice, and the risk is better managed.
I'm not complaining. Pen relaxes more inside the cabin.
She lets me do more when we're here. I like it better that way.
"I can't—" she says.
"You have to."
"Leon—"
"You've taken everything I've given you so nicely. You're so good."
"Yeah? Tell me."
Fuck. She wants me to talk? I'll talk. She wants praise? I'll give her praise.
"Just look at you," I say. "So willing. So easy to make you come. I'd just have to tease your clit and I'd have you shattering."
A noise comes out from deep in her. I clench my jaw.
I release my cock and slow down my thrusts. Only so I can use two fingers to make long passes between her labia.
"I could slap your pussy and you'd take it, wouldn't you?"
She moans for an answer. I press on her clit, but I'm not getting the room I need, with her leg flattened against the mattress like that.
I release her. This time, I push her knees up.
"Hold them," I say.
I ground myself on the floor again. Her moves are slow, but she does as told.
"That's right." I pat her pussy as if congratulating her. "I knew you would follow instructions so well. Let's see what this cunt can do."
"Such a dirty mouth." The words come out strained.
The slaps come a bit harder. "I can say worse, if it's going to get you dripping all over my cock."
"That— depends." She reaches between her legs with one hand, and down to the point where we connect. "What else can you do to me with this?"
"Oh, Pen." I fuck her and her hand together. "I'm wise enough to know it's not so much about what I can do with it…"
I change the angle, searching for the right spot inside her. The hiccup in her breathing tells me when I've found it.
"... it's what I can do to your clit," I add. "All of it."
I make passes of my thumb on the swollen head, while keeping the angle rubbing her from within.
Her sounds become more hectic.
"And I've learned…" I open her labia with one hand. With the other, I tap on her clit. "There's plenty we can do here."
"Because you're a good student? So fucking service oriented?"
I watch her. She watches me back. Her eyes are half closed, but a wrinkle appears between her brows.
Her lips part. "Fuck, don't answer. I don't want to think of who taught you all of this."
"Why? Jealous?" I breathe.
She doesn't say anything.
I tap her clit harder. "Tell me you're jealous."
"I shouldn't be."
"Wrong answer." I stop moving.
"Don't stop!"
"Then tell me you're jealous." I play with her again. "And I'll give you exactly what you want."
"Why… why do you…"
"Why do you think?" I slap her clit.
"Oh my God!"
"Are you jealous, Pen? To know I've fucked other people?"
I slap her again. She squeezes my cock with both hand and pussy.
"I don't like you as much right now." She clings to my neck with interlocked fingers, pulls herself up, and locks her legs around my hips.
She brings my head down for a demanding kiss. I scoop her up until I'm standing straight and holding her in my arms, impaled by me. Her pussy flutters around me and a moan escapes her. I'm making the same kind of sounds. We're getting close.
She rocks her hips, creating friction between us. "I've been with other men, too."
"Fuck. Pen."
"How do you like it when I'm making you jealous?"
"I hate it." My fingers dig into her thighs, holding her close but giving her the freedom to roll back and forth. "But I'm the one inside of you. I'm the one you're riding. I'm the one railing you three times a day. Fuck. Pen. I'm the one you're married to."
She comes. The way she holds me, squeezes me, rides my cock through it has me at the verge.
"Don't stop," I say. "Work me through it."
She keeps her movements, even if her rhythm suffers. A small cry of pleasure escapes her throat.
My fingers dig deep into her flesh. "Work harder."
"Unbelievable."
Despite her complaint, she does as told. I turn and throw myself onto the bed. It breaks with a loud, wooden snap, and it throws us off balance.
She screams. We could have decoupled, but I keep her on me. I hold our place with one foot on the floor, and the other on the tilted mattress.
"Ride me. I don't care," I say. "Ride me until I come."
"Bear— I—"
"Fuck, Pen."
I turn us on the bed until she's on her back. The structure breaks further, with the whole bottom now on the floor. I ignore it. I rock in and out of her, and keep going as if that was part of the plan.
"I'm jealous, too," she breathes. "Of anyone you ever fucked like this."
Her confession breaks me. I spill myself in her. I'm faintly aware of the sounds I make, of my faltering pace, and the craving that doesn't fade from my chest.
When I come back to myself, I'm still inside her and she's caressing me.
My heart could burst.
I linger like this. Once I move, my brain will come back online, and I'll have to think about what I just did. What am I doing, bringing up jealousy?
But I'm jealous. As soon as I think of her with other people, I want her to only want me.
If she's jealous, then at least I'm not alone with it. And my heart can scream as loud as it wants to, because as long as Pen and I are both feeling the same, then we're not in as much trouble as we could be.
I pull away and throw myself back on the mattress.
"And to think we're going back home tomorrow," I say.
Training camp is coming up, and we need to prepare for it. Pen needs to prepare her application package, too. But most of all, we need time.
We've been lost in lust, like our rules gave us a fast approaching deadline, but they didn't. They just told us we'd do things according to her bucket list. That's what we've been doing, but we could be doing it for a long time.
Maybe until the day she decides my body is done satisfying her physical needs, and the next step is going back to only our friendship.
On that day, she'll remind me we were meant to divorce.
It will destroy me.
My heart pleads that I put two and two together at last, but I look the other way. Just for a little bit longer.
Only while we're on our second honeymoon, I promise myself.
For the last few days, my heart and I have been playing a game of chicken.
My emotions know that I needed them in bed with Pen and I, for reasons I can't inspect too closely.
The moment I put words to what I'm feeling, it will be too late to compartmentalize them again.
I can't risk what that could do to our friendship.
Pen's head drops to the side. She watches me with an arched eyebrow. "You're not going to say anything about how we just broke the bed?"
"Huh. Did we?"
The box spring is slanted, but we manage.
We. Need. Time. Or I do, to figure out how the hell I'm going to come to terms with my heart, now that it will not go away into the vault, no matter what I may try.
It knows that, deep inside, I don't want to put it away, and it's taking advantage of me.
I gaze around us like I'm just realizing what we did. "I think I'm going to have to buy this place."
She laughs. She thinks I'm joking.
"At least that way no one can complain we broke the bed, right?" She studies me with smiling eyes. "We can go through every damn piece of furniture and destroy them if we want to."
"That's the idea."
"But what are we going to do about this one?"
I get up and help her off the bed. It only takes a couple of strong pulls to detach the box spring from the headboard. It falls to the floor with a big thump.
"Wow." Pen snorts. "Have I ever met someone this unfazed?"
"You've known me for a long time. Now at least we can still use it to sleep." I give her a cocky look. "How big a tip do you think I need to give them, to make them forget this is a problem?"
She laughs.
She holds my hand and pulls me to the bathroom. "Can we wreck the shower too, do you think? We need to give it a proper goodbye."
"Let's see what we come up with," I say and follow her.