13. Kareem
CHAPTER 13
KAREEM
T he moment they arrived back in Qalmar, Kareem found himself missing Monaco. Ordinarily, it would have been good to be home — it would have been refreshing and calming to be back in the place that was more familiar to him than any other.
But a part of him felt as if something vital had been left behind in Monaco. While they had been there, he had felt free to enjoy himself with Keira. He had stopped thinking about the fact that their relationship was a sham, that they needed to make sure to perform every moment so they wouldn’t be caught. He had simply gotten to know her better — and he’d liked it.
Now that they were back in Qalmar, though, things were different.
He spread the paperwork detailing his agreement with the racing venue before him and tried again to focus on what he was doing. These papers needed to be signed and returned today. Renting the space was the biggest investment they were going to have to make, and once they had done so, it would be very hard to undo what they’d done. But Kareem knew this was where he would take his largest risk, as well. Putting his name down on paper officially meant that people here in Qalmar would know what he was doing. They would know that he was trying to organize a race. And once that became known, it was only a matter of time until the word got back to his father.
“What are you doing?”
He looked up. Keira was standing in the doorway, watching him.
For a moment, he felt robbed of breath. He couldn’t seem to get used to his beautiful she was. She’d allowed her auburn curls to hang loose around her shoulders today, and she wore linen pants and a tunic — a Qalmese style. It was exciting to see her adapting to the culture here, and every time Kareem saw her take another step into living life as a Qalmese woman, it made it more difficult for him to remember that she would not be staying. Eventually, she’d go back to America, and he’d never see her again.
It doesn’t have to be like that. We’re friends now, aren’t we? And friends keep in touch with one another.
Yes, they were friends. But their lives were so different. He didn’t know how he would manage to maintain a friendship with a woman who lived so far away. They could write emails and text one another, but it wouldn’t be the same as seeing each other every day, and eventually they would grow apart.
This was always the plan. Why do I care so much all of a sudden?
“Are you okay?” Keira asked, stepping into the office. “You seem a million miles away.”
“I’m all right,” Kareem assured her. “I’m just looking over these documents.”
“Is everything what we expected it to be?”
“It is, yes.”
“Then you should sign them so we can return them quickly,” she said. “It’s for the best if we don’t keep the venue waiting. After all, we can’t do anything until we’re sure we have that.”
“No, I know,” Kareem said. “It’s just that… once I put my name down on this form, it’s official.”
“Don’t you want it to be official?”
“Yes. I just don’t want my father to find out.”
Keira sighed.
“What?”
“Nothing, I just… I don’t like how fearful you are when we’re in Qalmar.”
“I’m not afraid of my father,” Kareem said. “But I am realistic about the power he wields. He has the ability to shut this down. All he would have to do would be to discover what we’re doing, and I’m sure he would put a stop to it. You don’t want that any more than I do.”
“No, I don’t,” Keira agreed. “But we’re going to have to take that chance. If your father finds out what we’re doing, he will stop us — you’re right. But if we never sign the papers, the event will never get off the ground in the first place, and that isn’t any better — right?”
Kareem found himself smiling. “You’re right,” he admitted. “The only thing to do is to take the risk.”
He scrawled his name on the signature line.
“Perfect,” Keira said, picking up the papers. “I’ll get these faxed over right away.”
“You don’t have to do that.” Kareem felt a stab of guilt. Handling faxes seemed like a job for a secretary or an assistant, and he didn’t want Keira to feel like he thought of her as beneath him in any way.
She laughed. “Kareem, you don’t know how to use the fax machine.”
“Well. There’s some truth to that.”
“I can teach you how later, if you want. That’s really a skill you should have, especially if you’re going to keep running this event after I go back home,” she said. “You’re going to need to get in touch with vendors next year.”
“Hold on.” Something had just occurred to him. “You’ll come back and help me with next year’s race, won’t you?”
“Well… I don’t know,” she admitted.
“You were adamant that you wanted your name on this,” he said. “That you wanted it to be part yours. Do you still want that?”
“Of course I do.”
“Then you must want to come back and be a part of it next year. And every year.”
Keira frowned. “I thought what you wanted was my expertise to help you get the event off the ground,” she said. “Why are you pushing to have me come back and help with it in the future? What difference does it make to you whether I do that or not?”
Kareem couldn’t answer. The truth was that there was no good answer. The reason he wanted her back was that he would miss her when she was gone — and that simply wasn’t something he could admit to. He couldn’t acknowledge that he cared about her enough that it would matter to him when she was out of his life.
“Just think about it,” he said, unwilling to write the idea off. “Wouldn’t it be nice to come back here every year and be a part of things?”
“It would be,” she said. “But I don’t know where I’ll be in a year — personally or professionally. I came over this year because I didn’t have anything else going on, but I don’t know if that will be true this time next year. It might be more difficult for me to fly halfway around the world and leave everything behind.”
Kareem heard the words that went unspoken. She didn’t know where she would be personally — that meant she might be dating someone. That was the only thing it could mean. And of course she might be. How could he expect anything else? She was a beautiful woman, and by this time next year, their sham of a marriage would be long over. It was ridiculous to think that she might not find something else.
It was ridiculous to hope that she wouldn’t. She wasn’t his wife. She wasn’t even his girlfriend. They were friends, nothing more, and barely that. If friendship was what he wanted from her, surely he would want to see her find happiness with someone?
He did want that. Of course he wanted her to be happy.
But he couldn’t deny the sharp twinge of jealousy he felt at the thought of her finding that happiness somewhere else. With someone else. When he thought of her — a year from now, after she was long out of his life — in the arms of another man.
She isn’t mine. I have no grounds to feel like this! I have to stop .
“Just keep it in mind,” he told her. “That’s all I’m asking.”
She nodded. “I will,” she said. “You’re right — it would be nice to be able to come back every year. And maybe it will be possible! We’ll have to see where life takes us.”
“I suppose we will,” Kareem murmured. He cleared his throat. “You’d better go send that fax. Our vendors are waiting to hear from us, and we can’t get in touch with them until we know we’ve got our venue secured.”
“Right,” Keira agreed. “I’ll take care of it right now. After I do, would you like to go out to dinner?”
“Out to dinner?” Kareem repeated.
“I thought it might be a nice way to celebrate this milestone,” Keira said. “We’ll have our venue booked — that’s huge, right? It means we know that the race is officially on.”
“Well, it would be good to celebrate,” Kareem allowed.
“So let’s get dinner,” Keira said with a smile. “I haven’t had many opportunities to explore Qalmese food since I got here. Of course I appreciate you keeping the house stocked with American favorites, but I’d also like to make the most of my time in this country by trying some new things.”
“All right,” Kareem replied. “Let me wrap up what I’m doing, and then we’ll go out. I can think of a few places nearby that might be good.”
“Do we need to make a reservation? If you’d like to give me the names of the places you’re thinking of, I can call around.”
“No need,” Kareem said. “Any of these places will take me as a walk-in.”
“They will?”
“My father’s the king,” Kareem reminded her. “If I ask them to, they’ll shut down the whole restaurant and just focus on serving the two of us.”
“Oh, don’t ask anyone to do that ,” Keira said, her face flushing.
“Are you sure? It can be nice to have dedicated attention at a good restaurant,” Kareem said.
“I wouldn’t want them to lose a whole night’s profits.”
“They won’t,” Kareem said. “The crown reimburses businesses for things like this.”
“Do you mean you would have to pay for it? Because you’re sinking so much of your money into this race already, I hate to think of you sacrificing even more.”
“No, no,” Kareem said. “Not me. The money would come from my father. It’s all right if he knows we went out to dinner together, so we can let him pay for that. Actually, it’s a good thing if he knows we’re going out to dinner, since that’s exactly the sort of thing newlyweds would do.”
“I see,” Keira laughed. “We’d be helping our cover story.”
“Exactly.”
“Well, if it’s like that, how can I refuse?” She smiled at him. “Going out to dinner and allowing the crown to foot the bill sounds wonderful to me.”
“Perfect. I’ll send a message ahead to a restaurant and let them know we’ll be coming — that way they can make the appropriate preparations,” Kareem said.
“Do I need to go home and change? This sounds like a fancier affair than what I originally anticipated.”
“No, not at all. Remember, we’ll be the only ones in the restaurant, so we get to decide how fancy or casual the night is. If we wanted to, we could go in our pajamas.”
“Being a member of the royal family has perks I never imagined,” Keira confessed. “If you’d asked me, I would never have guessed that this would be an element of my life here in Qalmar — going out to nice restaurants on a whim and taking over the whole place. I mean, it’s the kind of thing you tell yourself will be possible when you fantasize about being a princess, but it also sounds like something out of a daydream.”
Kareem beamed. “I’m glad my country has made you feel like your dreams are coming true.”
Immediately, he felt as if he could have swallowed his tongue. What Keira had said hadn’t been nearly as dramatic as his response. Surely she would think he was foolish for making such a big deal out of it.
But if she felt that way, she gave no sign. She just smiled at him. “I’m glad to be here in Qalmar,” she told him. “This really has been the adventure of a lifetime. I’m glad I took you up on your offer.”
“I’m glad you did too,” Kareem said quietly.
The truth was, he was beginning to feel — already — as if he couldn’t imagine his life without her.
And that was a dangerous thing indeed. Because, soon enough, she would be gone.