Chapter 4
Vanessa
“?Quieres un poco de mi bistec encebollado?” Lisa asks.
“What?”
“My steak and onions, Vanny. Goodness. Do you want some?”
“Oh, sure. I didn’t hear you.”
“More like your command of the Spanish language is limited to hola, adiós, tengo hambre, and ?dónde está el bano?”
She’s not wrong, but I’ll never tell her how much that fact bothers me, so I pretend to be unfazed. “Shut up, pendeja. I know more than that. You forgot cabrón, puneta, cono, hijo de la gran puta, bicho, chocha, and arranca pa’l carajo.”
“Impressive. You can have sex with a guy and insult him and his mother when he turns out to be bad in bed.”
“Exactly. Got all of my important bases covered.”
Lisa reaches over and sticks her fork in my pollo guisado, swiping a potato before I can even object. We’re facing each other on a sumptuous midnight-blue velvet couch, our lower halves tucked under chenille throws.
“Okay, so what’s the plan?” she asks. “How does this usually work?”
I set down my plate and take her through the basics: “Think of it as a roller-coaster ride. The relationship starts with the initial climb. There’s anticipation.
Excitement. A little trepidation. This is when I’m flirty and giving good banter.
Then we reach the top of the hill. Things are good.
He’s truly starting to see the possibilities.
In reality, it’s the high point, and he’s about to experience a nightmare of a drop. ”
“How do you keep him coming back after the drop?”
“That’s when we enter the loop-the-loop phase. A little good here. A little confusion there. Just enough to make him feel like he doesn’t know up from down. He starts to wonder whether I’m right for him. And then I do something that pulls him back in.”
“Girl, this is diabolical.”
“I know.”
“And then what?”
“And then we settle into the brake run.”
“What’s that?”
“That’s the section of track that slows down the ride before it ends. So to continue with the analogy, this is when the writing’s on the wall and the breakup is close.”
“And this works for you?”
I pick up my plate and dig in to my food again. “Not every time, but it’s worked way more often than it’s failed.”
“So how do we get started? Setting this in motion with Jason, I mean.”
“Well, we need a reason for us to be in the same place. That’s the first step.
It’s probably too soon to get an invite to anything related to his sister’s wedding.
And since I can’t guarantee that I’ll be able to charm him quickly, we need a nonobvious reason to put me in his orbit on more than one occasion. ”
Lisa ponders this for a moment, her head tilted to the side.
“What about the store? Jason’s in construction, and La Flor needs some updating before Mami and Papi can put it on the market, right?
I already talked to Papi about the idea of getting someone to stage the place, so he won’t mind or ask too many questions.
I’m thinking it wouldn’t be suspicious at all to ask for Jason’s advice.
See if he would be willing to stop by and take a look. Maybe he’d agree to help.”
“That could work, actually. I’m on vacation until the satellite office opens in August, so I can help at the store until then and be the go-between if he comes around. If that doesn’t pan out, we can always regroup and think up a different plan.”
“Okay, great. I’ll call him and see if he’s free next week.”
“Perfect. The next step is target reconnaissance.”
“Which means?”
“I need as much information about Jason as you can give me. I’ll do my own search of his social media accounts, but why don’t you share what you know firsthand.
Likes, dislikes, past relationships, whatever else might be helpful.
I’m looking for things I can use to my advantage. Either to hook him or to sink him.”
She places her finished plate on the coffee table and snuggles into her throw.
“Okay, he’s twenty-nine like you, grew up Catholic, has two sisters, Cami—she’s the one getting married, obviously—and Denise, the law student who swears she’s a lawyer already.
She’s scarily brilliant and also irritating as fuck. ”
“What’s the irritating one’s deal?” I ask between forkfuls of stewed chicken.
Lisa shrugs. “She doesn’t like me. Never has. I think she’s jealous of my relationship with Cami. Whatever. I try to avoid her as much as possible. I suggest you steer clear of her too.”
“Got it. What else?”
“He’s an excellent cook. Always brings the most amazing food to family get-togethers.”
“Are you sure it’s not store-bought?”
“I’m sure. He’s using his mother’s recipes, and she’s damn proud of it.”
“That’s good. I’ll try to make use of that somehow. So he’s close to his mom?”
“He’s the oldest, and he’s the only boy. I don’t think he has a choice in the matter.”
“True,” I say, my lips twisted in a half smile. “What about hobbies?”
“He’s a Mets fan. Or is it the Yankees? ?Qué sé yo?”
“Lili, that’s not even funny. There’s a huge difference between being a Yankees fan and a Mets fan.”
“He’s a Mets fan, all right?” Under her breath, she adds, “I’m pretty sure.”
“Never mind. It’ll be easy enough to get that info on my own.”
“Oh,” she says, her eyes widening, “and he likes to go thrifting. Also, flea markets. It’s a running joke in the family that all of his gifts are secondhand items. I don’t think that’s true, but they kid him about it anyway.”
“That’s…enlightening. Do you enjoy any of his interests?”
She frowns at my question, as if it never occurred to her that she should. “Not sure. Which is why I need the opportunity to figure that out.”
Okay then. I’m going to hold my tongue here. No sense in making her defensive when she’s only now warming up to me. “How about past relationships?”
“He’s tight-lipped about anyone he’s ever dated, but I know he had a serious girlfriend a few years ago. They were talking about an engagement. Cami said they just drifted apart, but I don’t think she’s telling me the whole story.”
“Okay, I’ll try to probe him on that topic at some point. It might give you some insight into what he’s like as a romantic partner, what issues might come up. How about dislikes? Is he a germophobe? Does he hate dancing in public? Anything I can exploit as a weakness?”
“Ooh, I know he’s not big on public displays of affection.”
“And how do you know this?” I say, raising an eyebrow.
“Ha, I wish. We’ve never done anything remotely intimate.
But I remember that when Cami first started seeing Bryan, she was confused about his lack of affection on dates, so she asked Jason about it.
He said he understood where Bryan was coming from because not all guys are into PDA, including him.
He told her this might be something she would have to compromise on.
That she couldn’t expect Bryan to go beyond his own comfort zone if he didn’t want to, but also that Bryan should try to bend a bit as well. ”
That’s surprisingly decent advice. Maybe Jason isn’t a complete asshole; maybe it’s a three-quarters deal. “And you said he’s in construction?”
“Yeah, he runs his own construction management firm. I don’t think he gets his hands all that dirty anymore. Mostly supervises projects around the city. Brings subcontractors together. Orders in bulk to get discounts for all of his subs.”
“What’s the name of the firm?”
“TAG Building Group.”
I immediately think of the talented and gifted program I attended before I was whisked away to private school. “Does TAG stand for something?”
“Torres and Gibson. Eric Gibson is his friend and partner.”
“So he’s handsome, he cooks, he owns a business, and he loves his family. I’m beginning to see the appeal.”
Lisa’s eyes spark with admiration. “Told you he’s a catch. And he’s my best friend’s brother, which is just the icing on the cake.”
Any minute now, my internal eye roll is going to dislodge a critical part of my brain. “Do you have any clue what he’s like as a boss?”
“I know from Cami that he’s self-conscious about his age relative to his employees. A number of them have been working in construction for decades, and here comes this kid, telling them what to do. He’s a bit withdrawn around them, according to her.”
Lovingly patting my food baby, I stand and take my plate to the sink, where I wash and rinse it before placing it in the dish rack. “I think that’s enough to get me going. If you remember anything else that might be useful, just let me know.”
“Sounds good. I’m going to check in with him about visiting the store.” She waggles her eyebrows. “Now I have an excuse to contact him.”
She picks up her phone.
“You’re calling him this minute?”
“No time like the present!”
Seeing her so enthusiastic about our joint project confirms that I made the right choice. She’s brimming with the kind of good energy I haven’t seen in her since I came home.
I chew on a hangnail as I wait for the call to connect. Judging by the way she jumps up from the couch, it does.
“Hey, Jason. It’s Lisa. How are you?”
There’s a pause on Lisa’s end, and then she lets out a torrent of words: “Oh no, everything’s fine.
It’s just…I wanted to ask a favor. See, my parents are trying to get a buyer to take over their business, and my sister and I think it’s going to need some updating before anyone will even look at it.
We don’t want to get fleeced by anyone, so I was wondering if you would be willing to check out the store and give us your recommendations.
Maybe give us a sense of how much we should pay for the changes…
You will? That’s amazing, thank you! Oh, tomorrow? That soon?”
Lisa gives me a questioning look, and I give her a thumbs-up.
“Yeah, tomorrow works. Eleven?”
She stares at me, her head tilted to indicate that she’s asking the question to us both. I nod.
“Yeah, eleven’s good,” she says. “Sure, great. We’ll see you then. And thanks again!” After the call ends, she blows out her cheeks. “He’ll drop by tomorrow.”
“Excellent. I’m going to tell Mami I’ll cover for her so she can sleep in. Otherwise, she’s going to be nosy and wonder if we’re up to something. Why don’t you plan to show up after eleven? That way, he’ll be forced to talk to me before you get there. Sound good?”
“Yeah.” Then she shakes her head.
“What? Second thoughts already?”
“No, it’s just…it’s exciting and nerve-racking at the same time. And holy shit, this might work.”
“Of course it’ll work. But Lili, you need to be sure about this. Because once we go down this road, you can’t just take it back. It’ll always be a thing between you two. And you can never tell him. Not unless you want to undo everything you accomplished.”
She nods decisively. “I know. And I’m sure. He’s worth it.”
Now that remains to be seen, but if she truly wants to go through with this scheme, I promise to be the best worst girlfriend Jason Torres has ever had.
“Good. Let’s shake on it.”
She takes my hand, her eyes overly bright. Okay, then. Ill-advised or not, we’re doing this. Let Operation Best Friend’s Older Brother begin.