24. Elijah
24
Elijah
“Please don’t…tell your dad about what I told you in the car, okay?” Tobias said as we parked in front of the lake house.
“Wait, you mean he has no idea?” I was shocked. For all the time they spent with each other, I thought they would’ve shared some specifics.
Tobias shrugged. “He knows some but not all. We sort of made an unspoken pact not to fully speak about it.” Tobias looked back at the house, and I could tell that whatever he was about to say next was going to be hard for him. I grabbed his hand again and squeezed hard. That seemed to calm him down.
“I was in a pretty bad spot last summer. Jude and Gwen found me one morning when I was sleeping in my car to get away from my dad. I was in pretty rough shape, and they took care of me, fed me, and nursed me back to health.”
“Oh, Jesus. Tobias.” I breathed. I can’t believe I never knew any of this. I have been blind all this time. Fuck, and I had thought Tobias’s dad was just strict. Just thinking about Tobias being left alone all those years, carrying all that pain—it crushed me. I couldn’t even begin to imagine what that must’ve been like for him. If I had known…
“I think I would’ve died that day had they not found me. I was giving up, Elijah. Your dad was my guardian angel that day.” Tobias broke. Tears streamed down his face, and I couldn’t help but lunge for him again.
“Tobias…this is…I had no idea it was that bad.” I squeezed him so hard, wrapping my arms around him tightly. No wonder he found such a safe place in my dad. Everything makes so much sense now, and the guilt hits me even harder knowing how blind I’d been. All the pain, all the unnecessary drama I dragged him through—he never deserved that. He deserved kindness. He deserved to feel loved.
“So please,” He sniffed. “Don’t tell your dad any of this. I…I don’t want him to know, I want him to be there for me because he wants to be , not out of pity but just because he cares about me. Because he likes who I am as a person.” He wiped his nose on his arm.
I smiled, cupping his face. “Tobias, he loves who you are as a person.” I brushed his hair back from his eyes.
We both looked back up at the house. Guilt returned to me quickly after realizing what I had done. I had broken up the only safety he had ever known.
“Come on. We’re going to solve this right now.” I said, opening up the car door.
Tobias followed me closely behind as we made our way back inside the house. I was going to demand dad's forgiveness if it was the last thing I did.
“We’re home,” I called out, slipping off my shoes.
I looked behind me and shook my head. Tobias was lining up my shoes and his by the door. He always did that, and it was precious.
“Out here!” Dad shouted from the backyard.
“Let’s go.” I tilted my head to lead the way.
We crossed the house and entered the backyard only to be met by a huge surprise.
My eyes widened. “Gwen!” I yelled.
There she was, sitting by the firepit beside dad, roasting a marshmallow. The fire illuminated her face like the angel she was. She stuck her stick in the ground and ran up to us with the biggest smile on her face.
“I called an Uber as soon as you two left. Honestly, I thought you two were going to beat me here. Something must’ve held you both up.” She said, squeezing us both. Tobias was as shocked as I was.
“What? How? When? Huh?” I stammered.
“I just had to come after you two came to get me. You were right. You both were so right.” She said, holding our hands. I thought back to what I said to her at the office.
I smiled, thankful that my words did what they were supposed to do.
“Now come on, my boys apparently promised my man some S’mores tonight.”
“We did?” Tobias asked, looking over at dad.
Dad rubbed his palms on his thighs and got up to greet us, too.
He looked at us both and wrapped his hands around the back of both of our necks, drawing us in for a hug.
“You’re both my boys. You’ll forever be my boys. Always have been and always will be.” He said, looking at me but lingering his eyes on Tobias. “I may get angry or disappointed sometimes, but that doesn’t mean you’re a bad kid. You’re a good kid. A really good kid. You both are.” He kissed us both on the cheeks. “And I love you both. Don’t ever forget that.” He squeezed harder.
This is exactly what I wanted Tobias to hear. My heart felt so happy and so full.
Dad dropped his hands from my neck and rested both of his on Tobias’s shoulders, looking him straight in the eyes.
"I'm sorry, Tobias. I've been so caught up in my own thoughts, and I took it out on you when you didn’t deserve it. Maybe I don’t fully understand everything that happened between you and your dad, but I know enough to believe that if you had felt safe, you would have been there for Elijah. You would’ve told me. And this week, you deserved to have been listened to. I let you down.”
Tobias’s mouth parted as his eyes darted over to me and then back to dad. “You had all the right to be disappointed in me.”
Dad dropped his hands and shrugged. “Maybe so, but it still was between you and Elijah to work out. I forget you two are fully grown men sometimes and can solve your own problems. It’s hard not to see you as my little boys who need me.” He laughed softly before looking down at the ground. “I’m not…I’m not someone you ever have to fear of losing, okay? No matter what, you’ll always have me by your side. I hate that I made you feel differently these past couple of days.” His eyes dropped down. “You’ll always have me. You understand?”
Tobias nodded his head. “I understand. And I love you too.” He smiled. “For the record, we’ll always need you.”
Dad took in a big breath, pulling Tobias in for another hug. They held each other for a minute, soaking in the hug before they broke apart.
Clapping his hands together, dad shifted his gaze back and forth between us. “Now, which one of you is going to roast me a marshmallow? I like my S’mores with extra chocolate.” He pointed out. “Alexa, play Too Experienced!” He yelled out. Suddenly, the backyard filled with dad’s favorite song. Tobias and I both looked at each other and laughed before joining them around the firepit.
***
“Hold on tight!” Dad called out to us. He was whipping it in his sports boat around the lake. The wind was in all of our hair, and we held on as he hit every wave, resulting in us jumping up and down. Gwen was right beside him, holding on to the dashboard tightly as we sped through the channel.
“Jude, you’re a madman!” Tobias laughed. Jude looked back at him and smiled before wooing and fist-bumping the air.
We just rented the boat for the day, so I was shocked to see him go so fast. Truthfully, I was shocked to see him rent the boat in the first place. This was a first for all of us, which was funny.
“I think I’m going to be sick,” I said, covering my mouth and looking over the edge.
Thankfully, dad took this as a sign to slow down the boat and start cruising. Thank god.
“Can you believe this is the first time we’re doing this? I can’t believe I waited so long!” He yelled back at us.
“It’s pretty crazy.” I lifted my eyebrows and looked at Tobias and Gwen, who both laughed understandingly.
“I’m going to take Gwen out tonight on the town. Just the two of us. You two, are you okay with having dinner on your own tonight?” He called out over the sound of the engine.
I swallowed hard, looking over at Tobias. We haven’t been alone since the heated night in my car, which was a couple of days ago. We’ve been doing things as a family since, so being faced with alone time again may be… interesting.
Nerves shot through my whole body just thinking about it. After that kiss we shared, I’ve been thinking about alone time with him more often than ever. Which I didn’t even know was possible.
“Yeah, we’ll be fine,” Tobias answered for me.
“Yeah, we’ll be good,” I called out.
Tobias kicked my foot, which made me realize that what I had said may have sounded weird. “What time will you be getting back tonight?” I asked to try and cover my ass.
“Hopefully late,” Dad said, looking over at Gwen and giving her a wink.
“Oh, gross.” I pretended to barf.
“Grow up.” Tobias laughed. “You can’t handle a little kissing?” He pretended to smooch the air.
“Get away from me.” I laughed as he closed the gap between us, pretending to smooch me as I squirmed away. Gwen and dad were laughing away at us.
“You better get used to it.” He said under his breath before peeling away and sitting back in his seat.
I sat up, clearing my throat. When I looked at him, he seemed completely unfazed. Behind his black sunglasses, he looked out to the water, the wind blowing in his beautiful golden hair. He stretched out his arms on the ledge of the boat to give us all an eyeful of his beautiful, built body—topless, as always, and completely delicious. I tried to look away, but come on.
I seriously had this Hercules lookalike whispering sweet nothings to me.
Fuck, I must’ve died and went to heaven.