Chapter 10
After she’d asked him to keep speaking through the Concord, Ambrose slunk from his coffin into her room. He lay in Lila’s bedroom once again. Pollock had gone to roost with the other crows the night before, so he had the room to himself. Only, it felt like she was right there with him.
It drove him absolutely feral when she did as he asked and took his stake to her wet cunt. Lords, how he wished he could see it. He wished he could see her. But he felt like if she were with him, nothing but pure restraint would’ve stopped him from ravaging her, from driving his teeth into her neck as he fucked into her.
He needed to calm down. To shake off the violence of his affection. Their time together just the night before wasn’t enough. It was never enough when it came to her. He wished he could be fully consumed by her at all times. Like Icarus to the sun.
But he could make sure this was enough—at least, for her. He could make the most of their time together, as sparse as it was.
Ambrose knew something was wrong, but she seemed so damned . . . tired. And he didn’t want to force anything out of her, especially if she was looking for comfort right now—not a solution.
He searched his heart and whispered the first thing he thought. I love your eyes. I know I’ve said this, but you have no idea the colors that shine through them. How they warm as you do, how the yellows and golds brighten and beam when I make you come, how the greens peek through when you laugh, or the copper that glows when you’re sad or upset—
You can see all of that?
Ambrose huffed another laugh. Remember what I said, darling. Your face speaks volumes before you even open those pretty lips. And those eyes—lords, those eyes. I can stare at them for eternity and never get enough.
He heard Lila hum and it tickled his mind. I like the sound of that.
Smiling, Ambrose hooked his arm behind his head, resting against the pillow. Her voice was growing more and more sleepy and the lilt did funny things to his heart.
I love the way you sound. Your voice is the sound to my soul. Every little moan you make sends me absolutely wild. Every laugh makes me feel like I can lift mountains. And every cry shatters my heart in a million pieces.
I have never, in my immortal life, loved like I love you, Lila Bran. You have lit up my soul from within, and brought warmth and joy and life back to the Crow Court.
Lila bashfully said his name like a caress, Ambrose . . .
Let me finish, love. I’ve told you some of my past. I have been scorned, kicked, beaten, shoved—made to believe I was a monster. Ambrose clenched his jaw, remembering his life, the blood on his hands, the lives he’s taken with his own teeth—most importantly, the taste of Lila on his tongue, and the feel of her flesh ripping under his nails, his fangs. Guilt and want wrapped themselves around him, constricting his throat, but he powered on. And though I believe myself still a monster, I know I am a monster for you, by your side. Like the shadow made by your sunlight. I am desperate and needy and completely obsessed with you.
A moment passed and Lila made no response.
Have I rendered you speechless, love? he grinned. Still, no response came. Smiling sardonically, Ambrose clucked his teeth. I guess I’ll have to repeat those words when I see you. Goodnight, love, and sweet dreams.
Ambrose kept the line of the Concord open, thinking of Lila, asleep, on the other side. How he wished he could see her. She always looked so peaceful as she slept, and he loved the small noises she made that sounded reminiscent of a tiny forest creature. He smiled to himself just imagining it.
Soon, he thought to himself. Soon, I’ll be with her as she sleeps again.