Chapter 20
20
The Cigar Room was located in downtown Bedford Heights. It was an exclusive men’s only lounge on Sundays, akin to its sister bar The Lipstick Hub who hosted ladies’ night on Fridays.
Sunday night I gathered around a black lacquer round table as I sat comfortably in a leather armchair talking amongst my boys I’d known since we was kids.
The room was dim as groups of men hung around other tables and booths. Some sat up at the bar, shooting the shit with the bartender or texting on their phones. In private rooms, other groups could be found holding exclusive poker games.
TVs hung up on nearly every wall in the large main space of The Cigar Room. Some were playing football highlights, and others were playing recaps of the latest NBA game.
I pulled my attention from the grueling defeat of the night’s Lakers versus Pelicans match and shook my head.
The Lakers were letting me down this season.
At my table, Makai and Savon were engrossed in whatever Gavin had been saying. Makai was shaking his head and Savon was doing his best not to humor Gav—which let me know Gavin was on one.
“Look, all I’m saying is, if you’re going to suck my dick in the morning, brush your teeth first,” Gavin declared.
I managed a snort as the others let loose and laughed a little.
“Bruh, be happy any woman wants to go near that thing,” Makai joked.
Gavin held his arms out, scrunching up his face. “So, I’m a bad guy because I want fresh breath on my shit? Nah, y’all just nasty.”
Makai flipped Gavin the bird and Gav shrugged it off before taking a pull from his cigar.
Nights at The Cigar Room used to be a casual thing for our group. One person paid for the cigars and another person paid for the drinks and food. We rotated each trip to the lounge.
Tonight, Makai was sponsoring our cigars while I copped the drinks, D’Ussé for the guys and a beer for me.
At one point, our group had been bigger, with the added body of our friend DreSean. He’d gotten married and had a baby girl, and could only break free once in a blue moon. Whenever he could get out of the house, DreSean chose to do so with his wife for date night . Didn’t blame him, he seemed content. I was happy for D.
Men’s only night or not, that didn’t mean the female staff of The Cigar Room didn’t get to work. Our waitress came over and checked on our table as she issued out a round of smiles at all of us. When her gaze landed on me and lingered, I took the time to appraise her silently. Big beautiful natural coils, smooth butter pecan skin, and a cute smile as she gave me all of her attention.
“Can I get you anything?” she asked the table, but her eyes were on me.
Gavin picked up his Brandy snifter and swirled around its contents. “Nah, I’m good over here.”
Makai waved her off as well. “I gotta work in the a.m., can’t have too much fun.”
“Heard you,” Savon agreed as he raised his remaining D’Ussé in a toast.
On her perky cleavage, our waitress’s name badge could be found. Trish .
I tipped my head toward her, letting her know I was good as well.
“Well, if you need anything, just give me a holler,” she said before she walked away.
I took a pull from my medium-bodied cigar that was a pleasant mixture of spices, nuts, and cedar. As much as I wanted to quit smoking, I needed this. A certain someone was on my mind and they shouldn’t have been.
The silence caused me to look up, finding my boys staring at me.
“What?”
Gavin smirked, looking past me at something in the room and coming back. “She was givin’ you the signal.”
Chancing a look over my shoulder, I spotted Trish at the bar collecting drinks for her other tables and sneaking a peek my way. When our gazes collided, she grinned before turning back to the bartender.
I focused back on my table and shrugged. “So?”
“ So ?” Makai repeated in surprise. “She cute.”
She was, but I wasn’t biting.
It wasn’t serious, but I found myself saying, “I’m sorta… involved with someone right now.”
Gavin snorted. “Duh.”
Confused, I angled my head. “What’s that mean?”
Gavin looked around the table before coming back to me. “I mean, I figured you was knockin’ down something new and she wasn’t lettin’ you out.”
“That’s how April’s ass had me in the beginning. She was on some vampire shit, had me all the way drained,” Makai said with a shake of his head.
“So you married her?” Savon challenged.
“Oh, most definitely,” Makai was quick to agree. He turned to me and pointed with his cigar. “We ain’t seen you since you and Leila broke up. Now you got this new one.”
I scratched at my jaw, debating over being open with them about my regression after my split. “I won’t lie, I was heavy in my feelings over her.”
Gavin sympathized with me, reaching out and squeezing my shoulder. “Y’all was locked in for a minute. Sometimes it takes time to get back to you and recalibrate after that.”
“Exactly,” Makai said in support.
“It took a minute to let it go,” I didn’t deny. “This new situation isn’t serious, but she cool.”
A nasty taste coated my tongue at that description of Kennedy.
“Ain’t nothing wrong with a little fun,” Gavin said.
I was past that stage of my life where I was fucking women because I could. Stability and closeness were what I was after. Something that mattered. A bond.
“I don’t know,” I admitted. “I think I’m too old for this shit. I wanna…buy her flowers, go for a walk, and talk to her, see how she’s dealing with her family issues.” I took a swig of my beer. “But I can’t. I’m just the guy she calls when she wants some dick.”
Gav looked at Makai who looked at him. Gavin swung back my way as if I were being stupid. “So, you’re living the dream?”
The group burst into laughter and I loosened up and chuckled.
If only it was that simple. The sex was good. I loved the way Kennedy had her reservations, but was willing to drop them when I pushed just right. How she was letting her guard down and becoming comfortable with me.
That silly little dance of hers lived rent-free in my head some nights.
“It’s…complicated,” I said carefully.
A knowing gleam passed through Makai’s eyes. “She got a man?”
Savon quietly watched me, and I felt an itch I couldn’t scratch.
I sat up and took another pull from my cigar, needing that rush of nicotine in my veins.
All eyes were on me, the music in The Cigar Room all but forgotten as well as the scene around us.
Blowing out some smoke, I nodded. “She’s spoken for.”
Gavin snorted and shook his head. “Even better.”
“She’s not happy,” I went on.
Gav was doubtful. “You fumblin’ the play, man.” He faced our friends in disappointment. “Next thing you know he gon’ be listenin’ to that moody, depressed R&B shit. Be out here singin’ side-nigga blues,” he joked, causing the table to roar with laughter.“Sick Wit’ it Records.”
Even I could laugh at myself with how pathetic I sounded moping over Kennedy. Still, something bitter lingered at the back of my throat, not going away the more I spoke these words out loud.
“Whatchu think, Von?” Makai asked, noting that Savon hadn’t said much since the topic had switched to my love life.
Savon knew me most, was my closest friend. If anyone needed info on me, they’d hit him up first.
Savon shrugged, tossing back the rest of his D’Ussé. “He ain’t even tell you the killin’ part.”
Both Makai and Gavin faced me, wanting to know the missing piece to the puzzle.
I sat back and rolled my eyes. “Her dad’s got a lot of money. He set her up with this guy and once they get married, they’ll probably be the blogs’ new favorite power couple or some shit.”
Makai’s brows furrowed in confusion. “What’s her name?”
I shook my head, not wanting to expose Kennedy.
“She’s got a big name,” Savon added.
Intrigue covered Gavin’s face. “So, you can Google her?”
I nodded.Though, I hadn’t done so. Wasn’t sure I wanted to see the face of the guy she was tethered to. Didn’t want to make it realer than it already was.
“How big we talking?” Makai asked next.
I kept my face even, not wanting to react to the facts as they were highlighted before me. “A billionaire’s daughter.”
Makai and Gavin made matching stank faces as they whistled. In Bedford Heights, situations like this never happened. Not everyone was poor or struggling, but no one was a millionaire, let alone billion aire.
“So, she’s legit, and all she wants from you is to pipe her down?” Gavin grabbed his snifter and raised it in appreciation. “Shit, that’s the goal.”
Again, maybe when I was younger. Now, I didn’t think with my dick so much.
Makai yawned and checked his smartwatch. “I need to head in. It’s past my bedtime.”
“You mean it’s past your curfew ,” Gavin teased as he downed the rest of his liquor. “You know April don’t let you out after the streetlights turn on.”
At that we were laughing once more.
I dapped up Gav and Kai and promised to link up again with them sometime in the future. In the parking lot, I saw them off as they climbed into their separate rides and pulled out of The Cigar Room’s lot.
I hung back with Savon as he stood at his Bronco. Unlike Gavin and Makai, he wasn’t about to mock me. As he studied me from behind his lens, I saw nothing but sympathy and understanding.
“Do you think you’re fucked?” Von wanted to know sincerely.
Oh, I was, but I wasn’t ready to admit it just yet.
I’d wanted to kiss her—not because she was half naked on my bathroom counter, not because she’d owned me when she went down on me, not because she rode me slow and stole my soul—but because of that fucking hat.
When I agreed to let her come through to do yardwork with me, I wasn’t expecting her to show up in her usual conversative gear, but I didn’t see the gardening outfit coming either. The hat may have been overkill, but it fit her. Made her look cuter than she was already beautiful.
It was non-sexual, and I wanted to kiss her, to wrap her in my arms, and crush her mouth with mine.
Suffice it to say, outside of the sex…I liked her.
I wasn’t one of those people who got caught up in all that soul-ties talk, but there was something about Kennedy. Her inexperience. Her trust in me.How natural it felt when we were together.
My mind was flush with the image of her running her soft hands up my chest. Her kissing my tattoos. Her cradling my face in her palms as she came on top of me.
“ Keith! ” she’d whined for me, calling out my name as her body shook against mine. Wrapping her arms around me and holding me close for comfort as pleasure washed over her.
I thought about her slipping my T-shirt on, padding barefoot out to my kitchen to learn to cook breakfast the way I liked. She stole smiles at me the whole morning, blushing and radiating this glow. She’d looked so proud when she properly flipped her eggs for over easy. She’d never had grits before, or apple butter. Thursday morning in my kitchen she greedily ate slice after slice of toast covered in apple butter after realizing she liked it. Even more, she decided she liked her grits the same way I liked mine after eating from my bowl.
Only when she got dressed to go did she come down from cloud nine and lose her spirit.
Outside of the sex, I caught myself slipping and wanting to kiss her for other things.
I wanted to teach her everything under the sun. Be her only source of knowledge. But that wasn’t enough. I wanted to learn her just as well. Learn her body, every curve, every pulse, every spot. Learn what made her laugh, smile, scowl—learn what made Kennedy tick and operate the way she did.
It was pathetic. I knew what it tasted like between her legs, yet I wouldn’t kiss her. Maybe I was punishing both her and myself for this ridiculous agreement we had.
“Careful, man,” Savon seemed to warn. “I don’t want you getting caught up and she just be using you for a taste of the wild side.”
I quickly shot that down. “It doesn’t seem like that with her. She’s not some stuck-up rich girl trying to have a little rebellion. The way she looks at me…it’s like she sees the world.”
Savon clasped my shoulder. “You better leave her now, because once you’re in it then you’re gone.”
He was right. We couldn’t get in it—at least I couldn’t afford to.
“Heard you.” I slapped my palm against his before reeling him in close for a hug goodbye.
My phone began ringing as I walked over to my Tahoe. As late as it was, a tremor of panic ran through me. Phone calls in the middle of the night were never any good.
My panic dissolved when I pulled my phone from my pocket to see that it was Kennedy calling.
It was almost midnight. She could only want one thing. As tired as I was, I might’ve been willing to give it to her.
I answered her call before she hung up. “Yeah?”
“Keith?” She sounded nervous. Uncertain. Shy.
“Is this a booty call?” I asked as I leaned against my truck and rested on the hood.
“No!” Kennedy was quick to say. “This…is me breaking the rules.”
That was all we’d done from the beginning. “What do you need, Kenny?”
“God, your voice,” she breathed out. “What are you doing?”
“Leaving a bar.”
“And getting into a Lyft, right?”
I chuckled. “I’m not drunk.”
“Keith.”
“I just had a couple of beers. Nothing too heavy.”
“Keith.”
Damn she was bratty. “I’m not. Can’t risk losing the one appendage you care about.”
She scoffed on her end. “I care about you, too, you oaf!”
A corner of my mouth threatened to curl up. “Why I gotta be all that?”
“Keith… Just, drive slow, okay?”
I groaned. “You not my girl to be telling me what to do, you know.”
“If I’m fucking you, you’re mine, remember?”
Wasn’t my exact words, but whatever. “Uh-huh.”
“Please.” She was begging now, her soft tone giving way to how worried she was over me. Just like I’d been at the thought of her driving home to Hampton Hills sleepy.
I stopped being an ass and sighed. “I’ll drive slow, for you, okay?”
“Call me when you get in,” Kennedy instructed.
We hung up and I got in behind the wheel. Almost immediately I found myself yawning and squeezing my eyes shut to let the feeling pass through me. Thankfully, it was a quick five-minute trip back to my crib.
Instead of calling Kennedy back right away, I went and took a quick shower first. I didn’t have to work until noon Monday, and I was planning on enjoying every bit of sleeping in.
But I always kept my word, so as I lay back on my bed, I pressed the button on Kennedy’s contact for a FaceTime call. We’d never done this, but I was fucked enough to admit I didn’t just want to talk to her, but I wanted to see her, too.
She answered me and I got a glimpse into her world as I spotted her sitting on her bed as well. She had a plush beige-colored headboard and cream-colored silk sheets. She herself was wearing a low-cut royal blue nightgown with a matching satin scarf on her head. The curves of her breasts were visible, and I loved the way the blue complemented her skin.
Kennedy took one look at me and smiled. “You made it in safe.”
I bobbed my head, feeling a blanket of sleep approaching. “I did.”
Kennedy went and laid on her side, propping her head up with her arm. “So, a bar instead of the strip club?”
“Maybe next time,” I said lazily.
She narrowed her eyes at me. “Next time, huh?”
“ You won’t strip for me.”
Kennedy chewed on her lip, taunting me. “Is that what you want?”
Maybe at some point, but my mind wasn’t entirely interested at the moment. “We’ll see,” I said as I rolled on my side and got more comfortable to look at her. “How was it with your boy?”
Kennedy frowned and shrugged. “It was okay. He’s kinda sad, you know? His whole life story is pretty sad. I just hope he can come to realize I can’t make anything better for him. That he deserves something real and someone better.”
There wasn’t a thing wrong with Kennedy. I couldn’t imagine this guy topping her in the better department, but I didn’t bother voicing it. “How was your day?”
Kennedy looked up toward her ceiling as she began describing her morning and afternoon. “Well, I fell asleep at his place. This morning we had breakfast and I had lobster and eggs, which was to die for. And then I went home and did some yoga. I talked to my dad for a little, and then I spent the day browsing recipes I wanna try to make. I actually want to go out and?—”
“You look beautiful,” I cut off her rambling and let her know.
She stopped talking and blushed, a glow in her eyes as she again bit her lip. “Thank you.”
“So, when do you want to get together to learn these recipes?” I asked.
All at once Kennedy’s mood sank as she lost her smile. “Actually, I…I think we should cool it for a while.”
I didn’t let her rejection faze me. “Okay, what’s a while?”
“Maybe just a week,” Kennedy said nervously.
She seemed off. As if a switch had been flipped. “What’s up?”
She looked down at her sheets, refusing to look at me. “I haven’t been…entirely truthful with you, Keith.”
“I’m listening.” And I was. Wide awake now.
Her sad eyes flickered to me onscreen. “That day after we met, I went home and had lunch with my fiancé.”
“Uh-huh,” I said when she didn’t go on.
“H-He made some threats.” Her voice was unsteady. “He said if I ever slept with another man, he’d kill him.”
I squinted, wondering just who the fuck she was dealing with. Because that was a huge red flag. “And what did he say about you?”
Kennedy looked at me incredulously. “He’s not going to hurt me . I’m worried about going out too much and establishing a pattern.”
I wasn’t convinced. It was nothing to brush off her fiancé’s threat toward me. What bothered me was the fact that Kennedy didn’t seem to see the bigger picture. That she must’ve trusted him, too, as if he’d only be a problem for me and not her.
“What did he say to you, Kennedy?” I demanded to know.
She shrank. “He’d keep me barefoot and pregnant so I would be too busy to stray.”
What the fuck?
I gritted my teeth and squeezed my fist shut. “And this is what you want to deal with?”
“No!” She was quick to say.
“Your pops cool with a dude talkin’ to his daughter like this?” I went on.
I could see tears welling in Kennedy’s eyes and I knew I’d pushed too far. She looked away and wiped at a tear that had slid down her cheek. “I was upset with Cain after that. He actually apologized the next time he saw me and said he’d never do it. But he meant it about killing anyone I stepped out on him with. I just… I want to keep you safe.”
“I’m already ready to beat his ass.”
“He has a gun.”
“So do I.”
Kennedy’s fear and unease was palpable.
Her martyrdom only served to annoy me. She was in a fucked-up situation and she was only worried about my safety.
My chest tightened at the reality and my rage lessened a degree.
Fuck, I couldn’t get in it again. Not with this woman. She’d never be mine.
I forced out a sigh. “A week, huh?”
Pitifully, Kennedy nodded. “Just a week or so.”
Or so . “Okay.”
“I’ll miss you,” her soft voice swore.
I needed to just let her go. Tell her I was through with this. Let her go off and meet someone else.
But the thought of someone else having her, touching her, teaching her, made my stomach hurt.
This situation was both maddening and sickening, and I should’ve walked away for my own good.
I did no such thing.
“Yeah,” I said before I ended the FaceTime call.
Feeling restless and stressed, I climbed out of bed and went out for a cigarette.