Chapter 30
Over the next couple of weeks, Kai found a rhythm in the new life that he was building.
Every morning, he showed up early to work and made himself indispensable until Abigail cut him loose at eleven.
He liked working at the cafe. It was a great distraction from the state of the rest of his life, killed some hours in the day and put some money in his pocket.
He liked his coworkers. They all accepted Kai into the fold like he’d always been there and didn’t seem to mind that he didn’t say much.
At first, he would leave at the end of his shift, unsure of what to do with himself, but as days slid past him, he started lingering.
Abigail seemed not to mind, so he lingered longer, helping out if she had things he could do or sitting out front.
He’d spent time exploring the bookstore that took up the back half of the cafe.
He’d flipped through a few books, but it just made him think of the one on Nolan’s nightstand that he’d never get to finish.
He kept waiting for the missing to ease, but it never did. He didn’t blame Nolan at all, though. He shouldn’t have copied the video. He should have deleted it.
The thing that bothered him the most was how easy it had been for Nolan to end things.
He knew it wasn’t rational and maybe not even fair, but it tugged on that part of his brain that wondered what it was about him that made him discardable.
He knew his uncle was a piece of shit, but Nolan was good and Kai was the only common denominator.
Sometimes he wondered if Nolan regretted it. As each day blurred into the next, it became easier to believe he didn’t. That the missing was all Kai’s. It hurt so bad it made it hard to breathe. It hurt so bad that, some days, it took all of Kai’s strength to move at all.
Kai had technically finished work a few hours ago, but, as usual, he stuck around and helped Abigail finish the baking and cleaning up.
It was mid-afternoon, and a quiet lull followed the lunch rush.
He came out of the kitchen to find Abigail watering the plants on the high shelf above the cafe’s front windows, standing tiptoe on a chair and leaning precariously to reach the plants on the far end.
Kai huffed in exasperation, already making his way over to her when she reached just a little too far and the chair she was standing on slid sideways out from under her. Abigail shrieked as Kai dashed to her.
“Oof,” Kai grunted, taking an elbow to the chest but catching her just in time. The watering can hit the ground with a crash, water glugging out of it onto the tiles.
“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry, Kai! Are you okay? Oh, God damn it!” She cussed, rushing to pick up the can.
“I’ll grab the mop,” he told her.
“No, I’ll go,” she said irritably, but Bryce was already wheeling it out to the front. “Oh, thank you, Bryce.” She took the mop from him while Kai grabbed the watering can.
Kai grabbed the folded stepladder from where it was tucked by the bookshelves and brought it back to the front, unfolding it to finish watering the plants himself.
“Thank you, Kai.” Abigail sighed. “I should have done that to begin with.”
“Is this enough?” he asked, lifting the plant he’d just finished watering down so that she could inspect it.
“That’s perfect. Thank you. Oh, look, it’s having a little baby!” She pointed to a tiny shoot just popping through the soil. Kai smiled, mildly amused, and put it back.
“You know,” Abigail said, dumping the mop in the bucket and wringing it out, “I really appreciate all the extra help you’ve been giving me.”
Kai looked at her warily, waiting to be reprimanded or told that she didn’t want him to do it anymore.
She must have caught his expression, because she shook her head. “No ‘buts.’ I just wanted to let you know I appreciate your help. I’ve been noting your extra hours, and I’ll make sure that you get paid for them, okay?”
“You don’t have to do that. I want to help,” he told her awkwardly, not wanting to cost her extra money, especially when she hadn’t asked for the extra help.
“I guessed that, but you should still be paid for your time. If it was a problem, I would tell you. I promise.”
“You don’t ask for help enough,” Kai told her, trying not to sound accusing.
The corner of her mouth quirked up. “Something tells me you know something about that. My husband used to say the same thing. It used to make him so mad.” There was wistfulness in her voice, and it spoke to the ache inside him.
Kai knew that Abigail’s husband had died, but she didn’t talk about him much.
“Do you miss him a lot?” Kai asked quietly.
“Every day.”
“Does it ever get better?” The question was out of his mouth before he realized what he’d said.
“Some days are easier than others. Sometimes, you think it’s getting easier, and then something will bring up a memory and then it kind of feels like it was just yesterday. Staying busy definitely helps.”
Kai nodded in understanding.
“You know, it’s still hard to talk about Eli, but it always helps when I do,” she said pointedly.
When Kai glanced at her, she was watching him shrewdly, a playful smile on her mouth like she knew her attempt to pry was not very slick.
Kai blushed but didn’t respond. Abigail laughed quietly to herself.
“Well, if you ever feel like it, we can talk about them together.”
“Um, Abigail?” Felicity called worriedly. Both Kai and Abigail turned to listen to her. “My mom just got called into work, and she needs someone to watch my little brother.”
“I can stay,” Kai said automatically.
“Are you sure, Kai? Felicity is supposed to close today. That’s a long day for you.”
“I don’t mind. I don’t have anywhere else I need to be.”
Abigail frowned but acquiesced, sending Felicity on her way. Felicity shot Kai a grateful smile and then hurried to the back to grab her stuff.
He’d been thinking about going to see the twins, but he could always go tomorrow.
He’d gone out to their school the week before to see how they were doing and deliver some leftover stuff from the bakery.
They’d hugged him so hard, Kai had felt extra guilty for staying away.
He hadn’t expected Liam to explain his absence, and he didn’t really know how to do it either.
He’d also caved and called Jason from the cafe phone when he’d had a private minute, just to let him know that he was okay.
Jason had been relieved to hear from him and had ranted for a solid fifteen minutes about what Liam had done.
Kai had been surprised that Liam had admitted it, but Kai hadn’t wanted to talk about Liam.
Jason made him promise to reach out but was reassured when Kai told him he had a job and wasn’t staying on the streets, which was mostly truthful.
The afternoon passed fast enough. Abigail left at four, and then things picked up a bit close to dinner and stayed that way until close. Kai had never worked a closing shift before, but Bryce walked him through it.
“Jeremiah comes most nights, and we have a few other regulars that stop by for leftovers after we’re done for the day.
I try to make sure there’s something for everyone.
It sucks ass sending people away with nothing,” he told Kai as they packed up the last of the croissants and anything that was close to end of life.
Kai had forgotten that he’d get a chance to do this part when he’d agreed to the shift, but now he was excited.
He’d never expected to be on this side of the door.
Kai was just getting ready to take out the garbage when the first knock came.
He glanced at Bryce, who grinned at him like he was amused by Kai’s excitement and motioned to the door.
Kai washed his hands, hoping whoever it was didn’t leave because he was taking too long.
He dashed to the door, unlocking it quickly and throwing it open.
His jaw hit the floor as he took in the boy standing in front of him.
His long, lank hair still hung in his face, and Kai was pretty sure he was wearing the exact same thing in the exact same condition as the last time he’d seen him, in the alleyway outside Chateau de Verre. It was as though no time had passed.
“Umm, hi. Are you new? Is Bryce here?” the boy asked.
“Hey, Jeremiah, here you go,” Bryce said from behind Kai. He gave Kai an odd look that snapped him out of his head.
“Wait, you don’t recognize me?” Kai asked, his voice pitching up in surprise.
“Naw. Should I?” the kid, Jeremiah, asked warily.
“You helped me, outside of Chateau de Verre, like, a month ago. You were scavenging when that asshole grabbed you,” Kai explained, still taking him in, amazed that it was possible that he was standing in front of him.
Recognition dawned and a wide grin spread across Jeremiah’s face.
“Damn, bro! You work here now? You look different!” His cackle let Kai know he didn’t look different in a good way, and Kai guessed that was fair, given that he’d traded his tux for an apron.
“Yeah, I work here. Man, I’m so sorry for what happened.
I tried to find you. Are you okay? How long have you been coming here?
” Kai asked in a rush. He kind of wanted to give the kid a hug, but even he knew that was probably weird.
Bryce was watching them, confusion written into the lines of his forehead, but Kai was too distracted to care.
“Yeah, man, it’s all good. You told me to come here, so I did, and that worked out, so thanks, I guess.”
“You’ve been coming here since then?” Kai’s throat started closing up, his eyes stinging painfully. “That’s good. I’m glad,” he croaked.
“You good, bro?” Jeremiah asked, concern etched into his voice. “Bryce, you gotta watch out for this guy. Last time I saw him, he was having a panic attack or some shit, and he’s not looking too good right now.”
“I’m good. I’m good.” Kai laughed, trying to pull himself together. “I’ve just been… worried. Listen, we’re just finishing up. Why don’t you stick around, and we can go get some real food or something.”
Jeremiah looked torn then shook his head. “I gotta go home before they lock the doors.”
Kai supposed it was comforting to know that he had some type of home to go to. “Alright, then come back tomorrow. At lunch. That cool?”
“Yeah, that’s cool, man. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Wait!” Kai reached into his apron pocket and pulled out the small wad of cash that was his tips for the day. Jeremiah’s face lit up and, when their hands met, Kai did pull him in for a hug, just because the overwhelming gratitude he felt right then needed some place to go.
“I’m glad you’re good, man. Come back tomorrow.” Kai watched him leave, and Bryce and Kai went back inside, locking the door behind them. Bryce looked at him, eyes wide.
“That’s the most I’ve ever heard you say at one time.”
Kai laughed, still riding the wave of happiness. Nolan would never believe what just happened and he wished, he wished, he could tell him. The high he was riding dimmed on the wave of longing that swept through him.
“Come on. Let’s finish this,” Kai said, still smiling.