15. Julian
JULIAN
I couldn’t believe this was really happening, but surely the things Lance had done to me would’ve woken me up if this was a dream.
I could smell him, feel him, hear every rough breath as he worked his hips against me.
I was so close. If he just kept going, I would come, explode, maybe die from all the pleasure.
My cheeks still burned as I thought of what I’d confessed to him.
I’d never told anyone about my fantasies.
I hadn’t thought I would ever act them out, certainly not with a man like Lance.
What was I doing? If I had any sense, I would’ve tried my best to run or taken him up on his offer of a safe house, but the way he was touching me made it hard to think and impossible to imagine him hurting me.
When he sat back, letting go of my wrists, I reached for him.
“Keep your hands above your head.”
I whimpered, the sound mortifying. “I need to touch you.”
“If you want to come tonight, you’ll do what I say.”
“Oh God.”
“Give into it, Julian. You want me like this. You want me to own you, to take you, to use you.”
“Yes.” I reached up, pressing my palms against the headboard.
Lance hung over me, braced on his hands and knees.
I tensed, waiting. Finally, he lowered his head and swiped his tongue over one of my nipples.
I jerked, the sensation more electric than I expected.
He drew the tight bud into his mouth, sucking, biting down.
It hurt, but it felt so good. I writhed, pressing harder against the headboard to force myself to keep my hands there.
He gave my other nipple the same treatment while flicking his tongue back and forth over the one he’d already tormented. I whined and whimpered, wanting him to stop and wanting him to never stop. How did he know just what to do to make me crazy? No one else ever had.
Not that I would have let them.
Why did I feel free with him? Because he wasn’t giving me a choice? Because he was so intense he didn’t seem real?
But if he wasn’t, how could he make me feel this much?
He let go of my nipples, then kissed and nibbled his way over my abdomen, coming close to my cock. I couldn’t hold still anymore. I lifted my hips, urging him to touch me, to taste me.
I needed this. I needed every sensation. I needed to revel in it. It was as if everything I’d denied myself for years, everything I’d kept bottled up was suddenly exploding out of me. How had he broken me like this?
He nipped at the thin skin over my hips and shoved my legs wider. “Hold them up.”
Oh my God, was he going to…
He licked the tender seam where my leg met my pelvis. When he sank his teeth into my inner thigh, I cried out. It hurt, but it also made my cock jump.
He sucked my balls into his mouth using his teeth just enough to send a jolt of fear through me while also keeping me hard as stone.
How had he gotten so fucking skilled? He probably had so much experience, a hundred times more than me, but I didn’t care about that.
All I cared about was what he was doing to me right then.
He cupped my balls in his hand, lifting them and exposing me even more fully as he ran his tongue along the stretched skin of my sack and over my taint. I tensed. No one had ever… “Lance. Please.”
He did it again, flicking his tongue over my hole. The sensation was incredible. I might come from it without even being touched, without anything else.
His eyes met mine. I couldn’t look away, even though I knew he was seeing too much.
“Don’t come. Not until I’m ready for you to.”
It was like he’d read my mind. “I’m not sure I can stop myself.”
“You can. You’re here to do what I want, to serve me.”
“Fuck.”
He pushed the tip of his tongue into my ass.
I grabbed for a pillow, digging my fingers into it and pulling at the fabric, wondering if I’d rip it in two.
I didn’t think I was that strong, but I also didn’t know if I could stand the pleasure Lance was giving me.
He made me crazy. He made me into someone else, someone I hardly knew.
He tongue-fucked me as I squirmed, whimpered, whined, begged.
I was gasping for breath by the time he stopped.
“One day, I’m going to do that until you come from just my tongue in you.
I won’t even stop then. I’ll keep going until you can’t possibly come another time.
I’ll keep destroying you until you’re fully drained and you can’t move, not even a finger.
“Oh God, please.”
“Not tonight, though. Tonight I don’t have that much patience.”
“I didn’t think… I didn’t think you had any patience at all.”
He laughed. “I’ll find some. I need it when I have you like this.”
He was charming me, seducing me. I wasn’t sure why when I’d practically demanded he fuck me. I couldn’t believe I’d done that. I’d obviously lost my mind, but it felt so fucking good. “If you’re impatient, why don’t you let me come?”
He raised his brows, staring down at me, looking more dangerous than ever. “Who’s in charge here?”
I glared at him, defiance coursing through me. I didn’t want to give in easily. I didn’t let people tell me what to do. I liked being in charge, except…
Lance pinched my nipples between his fingers, twisting them, making me cry out. “Who’s in charge?”
I couldn’t catch my breath. It was too much and not enough. I was lost. I was scared and also the happiest I’d ever been.
He wrapped a hand around my cock, squeezing just enough to make it hurt, then he stroked me, and I lifted my hips, trying desperately to get more friction.
“I can keep this up for a very long time. When you challenge me, I can find patience.”
“You,” I gasped. “You’re in charge.”
“That’s right, baby, so don’t argue with me. I know what’s best for you.”
I wanted that. In a dark, secret part of my mind, I wanted someone who knew what was best for me, someone who could fix things, but that only happened in books. It wasn’t real.
Except right now… If I let myself forget everything but Lance and me in the bed, then maybe—just for a little while—it could be.
He pulled my legs down until my feet were flat against the mattress. Then he moved between them, teasing my cock by running a single finger up and down the length. He replaced it with his tongue, swiping it over me.
I was so close. I didn’t know if I could hold back. “Can’t… Need to come.”
“I’m not ready to let you,” he said as he took me in deep. My cock slid to the back of his throat, and I squeezed my hands into fists, stabbing my fingernails into my palms, fighting the urge to let go. I remembered watching him suck me in my fantasy. It was even better in real life.
A few seconds later, he pulled off. I whimpered. “I want…”
“You want me to suck you until you come down my throat? You want to fuck my mouth?”
I shook my head. “No. I want you to use me. I want you to take what you want.”
“Oh, I will. I definitely will, and that includes having a chance to swallow your load as you cry out, driving into my mouth. That’s not what I have planned for tonight, though.
That’s for another day. Maybe one day when I fuck your mouth too, shoving my cock all the way in, blocking your throat, making you gag around me. ”
Holy fuck.
“Look at me.”
I forced myself to open my eyes. Heat filled my face, but he was right. I did want that.
“You’d like that, wouldn’t you? You’d like to be used like that. You’d lose your mind if I did that while I sucked you too.”
“I don’t… know if I… could.”
“You can do anything I want. I believe in you.”
In that moment, I was sure he did. I didn’t know why, though. It wasn’t like I’d shown him any particular abilities except to confess a whole lot of embarrassing things and let him into the library.
He brushed his thumb across my cheek.
“Whatever you’re thinking, you’re wrong. You’re an incredible fucking fantasy come true.”
No way did this man fantasize about someone like me. This was just convenient for him. I was willing to let him take charge, and he liked that, but he’d never seek someone like me out.
“I mean it. You’re fucking perfect.”
“I—”
“I already told you not to argue with me. You want to come, don’t you?”
“Fuck yes.”