Epilogue
Ernest Marx 1.
“I love them. A lot. Aren’t they great? My whole family. Just swell. The lot of them.”
“I know, Ernie. They are.” Bailey drags my arm over her slender shoulders, steadying me on my feet in front of our little cottage on the family compound I was gifted a few years ago. I moved Bailey in right away, not wanting to be apart from her. From the beginning, we just clicked.
“And you.” I kiss her temple. “I love you so much. More than any of them. But don’t tell them. It’ll hurt their feelings. They are a sensitive bunch.”
“Yes, dear.”
Inside the cottage, I start stripping off my clothes on the way to our bedroom. By the time we cross the threshold, I’m naked and burning up and hard as fuck. Bailey is beautiful. The most beautiful creature I’ve ever seen. And she’s mine.
“Come here, baby.” I loop my arms around the small of her back, bringing her close. She arches her neck automatically, meeting my lips with hers. We kiss, our tongues duel, our hands roam. Blessedly naked against me, I play with her little tits and squeeze her tiny ass. She’s small everywhere, like a delicious little treat. Pushing her back on the bed, I part her legs and dive between them. Her back arches, her mouth opens on a silent scream, and I feast.
“You taste so good.” I murmur into her pussy, rubbing my face all over, getting her juices everywhere. I suck on her clit, nibbling it with my teeth and reach up her body to her nipples. Overstimulated, she cums with a high-pitched keen, my cock jerking at the sound like Pavlov’s Bell.
Standing, I plant my fists on either side of her head and thrust into her to the hilt. “Fuckin’ A.” She’s always so warm and wet and receptive. The way her body welcomes me, clutches tight to my shaft, begs me with every undulation…making love to my woman is unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. And I pray the day never arrives that we lose this between us.
“Ernie! Cum.” I roll my hips faster, push deeper, until the tip of my cock tickles her cervix. Thumb on her clit, I lean down and suck a pretty, pink nipple into my mouth and she cums. Her pussy constricts so tight I can barely withdraw, so instead I grind, rocking back and forth until I’m spent. Slowly, we catch our breath, and I slip out of her. “Goober.” She calls me with a chuckle when I drop down to my knees and watch my seed drip out of her.
“We should have a baby.”
“We should,” she agrees easily. “Let’s get married first.”
“Ok.” I’m suddenly very tired. The day catching up with me. I crawl into bed, and I’m out as soon as my head hits the pillow.
Ernie 2.
Checking my rearview mirror, I merge onto the highway. Moshe types on his phone in the backseat. “Avinu?” I call out to him before I’ve thought it all through.
“Yes, Ernie?”
“When you proposed to Seril…?” I trail off, unsure how to ask what’s on my mind.
“Ernie? What’s up?”
“Sorry, boss. Uh. So. I want to marry Bailey. I’ve known since the moment I met her. It’s just…there’s been so much going on with the mishpocheh, and it’s never been the right time—”
Moshe snorts loudly, my jaw snapping shut. I meet his eyes in the mirror, my mouth turning down into a frown at his expression. “The right time ? Seriously? Is that why you haven’t popped the question? You’ve been waiting for the right time? ”
“Could you not say it like that?”
“It’s justified. Also, fuck you, because I seem to recall you doing a lot of reenacting when Seril and I were getting started.”
I tilt my head side to side. “Fair.”
“Ernie. Bailey is end game, right?”
“Yes.”
“A piece of paper isn’t important to a lot of people, but in our line of work…that piece of paper means the difference between life and death, security and poverty. If you love her, marry her. You can’t wait for the perfect time. It doesn’t fucking exist.”
“But I live in a cottage on your property—”
“You live in a three-bedroom, two-bathroom home that you didn’t have to pay for, on property you are not required to maintain, so that you are close to your family and work. Besides, from what I hear, Bailey loves that house.”
“She does?”
“You’re a fucking idiot. She loves the house. She loves you. She wants to fill it with Ernie-babies and be a part of a loving, caring family.” Moshe sighs, shifts in his seat so he’s leaning between the two front seats to stare at me with disapproval. “It is our job as their men to guarantee they have everything they could ever want, but more importantly everything they need. She needs you, Ern. Make sure she’s got you.”
“Thanks.” I swallow hard, focusing on the road while Moshe sits back in his seat and resumes typing on his phone. A little later, I pull into the family compound. I’m opening the door for Moshe when I hear a loud whistling sound. Looking up, I have just enough time to shove Moshe back in the car and slam the door shut before something crashes into the house and explodes.
I blink several times, trying to clear the fog from my vision. My ears feel funny. I can’t hear anything. It’s hot. So hot. My vision clears slightly, and I start frantically crawling toward the fountain. It’s obliterated, but there is still water. I drop my lower half into the water and my right arm. I am on fire! Was. I WAS ON FIRE!
“MOSHE!” Shit, I forgot about the Avinu. Extinguished, I leap from the remains of the fountain and fight through the nauseating pain to get to the SUV that is now on its side with flames 10 feet high at the front end.
I manage to climb on it, using every ounce of strength I have left to open the passenger door. “MOSHE!” I’m screaming, but I can’t really hear anything besides a high-pitch ringing, so I don’t know if he can hear me. The door finally gives; I push it up and open and nearly puke all over my cousin. Moshe is pinned in the backseat, his right leg at an unnatural angle and split open. He’s unconscious. And I’m momentarily glad for small favors.
“HELP! HELP THE AVINU!” I’m screaming, knowing I can’t get him out by myself. Something touches my back, and I slip backward off the vehicle. I stare up in shock at Yak as he cradles me in his arms. I start laughing, rather hysterically, and he puts me down on the ground away from the vehicle and debris.
I watch in stunned silence as our men start pouring in. They right the SUV and are successful in getting Moshe out. He’s whisked off somewhere, then Yak is back in front of me, kneeling on the ground. His mouth is moving but I can’t make out what he’s saying. I bat at his hand when he pinches my nose shut, but he’s hella strong. He mimics blowing out through my nose and I get the idea. Something pops in my eardrums and though the ringing is still there, other sounds start filtering in.
“Ernie.” I stare up at him and wait. “More ambulances are on the way. We had to prioritize injuries, but you’ll be taken to the hospital soon.”
“I’m fine.” I push to stand up, but Yak’s hand on my shoulders keeps me planted on the ground. “Where’s Bailey? BAILEY!”
“Calm down. ERNIE! CHILL THE FUCK OUT!” Yak yells in my face. “Bailey is alive, but she’s injured. Everyone is…injured. She’s going to the hospital too, just not yet.”
“Yak, you can’t wait. If she’s hurt—”
“Ernie.” No. No. I don’t like his tone. What it implies.
“Who…who’s dead?”
“The bomb hit the center of the compound. Esther, David, Suzie are…they’re gone.”
“No.” Tears falls from my eyes unbidden. I can’t stop them.
“I’m sorry, Ernie. The others…are in serious condition. Luckily, Seril is out with Shon, Ruthie, Zeppo, Harper and the Goldman boys. Arlo is with Vandy’s parents. Sophie is at the Mishpocheh Consortium.” Good. We’d just left there for the day. “And Jonah—” He cuts himself off when his phone rings. “Yeah?” The color drains from Yak’s face, his eyes close, his body tenses as he stands up and starts pacing. “What do you mean—are you sure? Who did this? Well, what the FUCK do you know? I’ll speak to you however I fucking want. Half of our fucking family is DEAD! I want to know who’s responsible!” He presses a button on his phone and shoves it into his pocket.
“Yak?”
“The Consortium…it’s been leveled.”
Saliva fills my mouth as my vision blackens. “The entire building—”
“Rubble.”
“And the people in it?”
“Under the fucking rubble, Ernie.”
“Moses, Miriam, and Aaron.” I mutter, my eyes drifting to the burning remnants of the Kosher Nostra compound. A numbness descends over me, pins and needles and despair.
“Swinging Schlay?”
“Still standing.” But for how long?
“Yak. Someone…someone is trying to eliminate the Kosher Nostra.”
“Yup.”
“Are they gonna succeed?”
Yak stares out into the distance, jaw clenched, his hands curled into impotent fists at his side. “Not sure.”
“Well, that’s not the answer I was looking for.”
Ernie 3.
“Ernie, please lay back down. You have burns on like 30% of your body. You need rest. And time.”
Glaring at Tovah, I grimace as I swing my legs over the side of the hospital bed. Burns or not, there is shit to be done. We are down…seriously down. So many people…I’m needed.
“Boy, I will knock you the fuck out if you don’t lay back down.”
“Ernie?” Bailey’s raspy voice breaks my glare-off with Tovah. “Please? I can’t…I was so scared, if you had still been in the SUV with Moshe…God, please just lay down. For me?”
Her tears are my undoing. I can’t fight against them. With great effort, I get back into bed and lay down. “How’s Moshe?”
Tovah sighs, leaning her hip against my bed. “He’s in a coma. They had to amputate his right leg above the knee. He has some bleeding in his brain. It’s…it’s not looking good for our dear Avinu.”
“Ernie.” Bailey cries and when she hands me tissues, I realize I’m crying too. Moshe…fuck. “I’m so sorry.” I hold out my arm and draw her into bed with me. Tovah helps us get situated.
“I have to go make the rounds.”
“Tovah…I’m so sorry about your parents.” She looks at me and I watch her shutter her emotions.
“ Death does not wait for you to be ready. Death is not considerate or fair.” Tov stands up straight, smooths her dress and strides confidently on her high heels toward the door to my room. “Death is a fucking miserable cunt.”
Bailey and I lay together for who knows how long. Grief is loud. All-encompassing. It swallows you whole and it’s up to you if the bloody crawl back out is worth it. Half my family is dead. I will never hear their voices, their laughter, share their joys and shoulder their pain. How do we move on from this? Rebuild? Do we want to?
“How’s your arm?” Bailey sniffles, rubbing her cheek on my chest.
“I’m fine, Ern.”
“You shattered your arm, Bailey. Are you in pain?”
“Physically, no. Mentally, emotionally…my heart hurts, Ernie. So much I can’t breathe.”
“I just keep thinking…and I want to kick my own ass…but I’m fucking thankful that you are alive. That we are both still here. I can’t imagine life without you, Bailey. I don’t want to. I love you.”
“Oh, Ernie…I know it feels wrong, but we are allowed to rejoice. I have thanked God a million times in the last few days that you were spared. Selfish or not. I love you.”
“We’re getting married.”
She smiles up at me. “Ok.”
“I mean it, Bails. As soon as I’m discharged, we’re going to the courthouse and getting hitched.”
“Sounds good to me.”
“I’m not waiting a minute longer than I have to.” I seal my vow with a kiss, taking her mouth roughly, desperate to feel her. Everything has changed. But she’s here with me and I ain’t letting her go.
Ernie 4.
“I can’t believe you’re here.” I hug my older brother and sister. They flew in from New York to surprise me. They’ve also come to pay their respects for the family we’ve lost. I still can’t wrap my head around it. But having my big brother Evan here makes me feel better.
“Our baby brother is getting married. You think we’d miss this?”
“It’s just a courthouse wedding. I told Bailey…once things calm down, we’ll do it right. Big ceremony, big reception.”
Emaline fixes the lapels of my suit jacket, her eyes glistening as she glances up at me. “You are doing it right. It’s right for you and Bailey. You are marrying your best friend; the rest is details.”
“Thank you.” I hug Emaline again and she chuckles before stepping back and wiping carefully under her eyes.
“We love you, Ern. We’re here for you. No matter what.”
My brother and sister follow me into the judge’s chambers. My foot taps impatiently, waiting for Bailey to arrive. There’s a knock on the door and it opens to reveal my beautiful Bailey. She’s wearing a short summer dress in a very pale pink. Her legs and arms bare. Her painted toes peeking through short, heeled sandals. Her long blonde hair is pinned in some elaborate updo, showing off her long, slim neck. My lips stretch as I take her in…it drops when I spot the gun held against her side. The man behind her using her as a shield to enter the room.
We’re in the courthouse; I don’t have my personal weapon on me as it’s not permitted. Apparently, bad guys don’t play by the rules. I don’t recognize him at first. They step further into the room, and he kicks the door shut behind him. The light of the room hits him just right and my breath hitches when recognition slams into me.
“Hans Gruber?” I can’t believe my own eyes. “But…you’re dead. Alan Rickman is dead.”
“Alan was weak. And so is the Kosher Nostra.”
“But why?” I don’t understand.
“Why?” He smirks, moving around the room with Bailey positioned in front of him. Out of the corner of my eye, I notice my brother shifting his stance, his hand sliding slowly behind him. He’s reaching for his piece. At least he was smart enough to come to my wedding armed. “Because the Kosher Nostra threw me out of a fucking window.”
“WHAT?” I shake my head, my hands itching to reach out and grab Bailey. “No, we didn’t. That was Bruce Willis.”
“Who the fuck is Bruce Willis?”
“Hans, Bruce is the guy who played McClane.”
“Lies!” He waves the gun around, his hold on Bailey tightening. “It was you! Moshe! SHON killed me!”
“He’s less than a year old!” I argue. How could a baby possibly have killed a fictional movie character?
“You all must die! Starting with your precious bride-to-be!” Hans points his gun at Bailey’s side again. I jump to stop him. The gun goes off as I land on him and knock him to the ground. I scramble for it, grabbing it seconds before Hans, put the gun against his forehead and fire.
“Ernie.” Bailey’s voice is weak. Broken. My God, no, not her. Spinning on my knees, I find her lying on the floor, the side of her dress covered in bright red flowers. Her flowers are soaking my pants. “ERNIE!” She screams but I’m right here.
“Bailey. Bailey, no. Baby. No.” I pick the flowers one by one, but the pile never gets smaller. Why is she bleeding so many flowers? “Don’t go. Don’t leave me.”
“I’m going home, Ernie.”
“No. Your home is with me!” Cupping her face, I fuse my mouth to hers.
“ERNIE!” She yells again…while I’m kissing her. “Ernie. That’s not me. You’re kissing Manny.” I pull back, confusion making it difficult to think. I jerk, startled to find myself staring into the pissed off eyes of Ruthie’s bodyguard Manny.
“Bailey?”
“I’m right here.” I slowly turn my head to the right and find my woman glaring at me. “Manny was kind enough to help me get you home.”
“But you were shot! You were bleeding flowers.”
“Oh, this is wonderful.” I ignore Tovah, pleading with Bailey to make this make sense.
“I’ve never been shot.” Bailey tells me.
“I have. Not fun.” Again, I ignore Tovah.
“But you were. Hans Gruber shot you because Shon threw him out a window. And he was so mad at the Kosher Nostra that he blew up the family compound and the consortium. Everyone was mangled or dead. Moshe—” My eyes dart around the room of expectant faces until I land on the Avinu. “Moshe, your leg was amputated, and you brain was bleeding.”
“Flowers?” He asks.
“NO!” That’s a stupid question. “Only Bailey bleeds flowers. And…and…and…Oh My GOD! I’m Bruce Willis!” I roll out of the recliner I don’t remember sitting in and crouch low to the ground. “I see dead people!”
“Ernie.” My head snaps up and I find Bailey softly smiling down at me. “You aren’t Bruce Willis.”
“Dude—” Zeppo is inches away from me when he speaks. Bailey…good God, I’ve never seen her so angry. Ever.
“YOU!” She points a finger at Zep menacingly. My dick likes it when she’s angry. Now is not the time! I might be dead. Or…the people here are dead? I don’t know what’s happening. “What the fuck is in that weed?”
Zeppo shrinks away. “Uh…weed?”
“Well, you better put a warning on it. My boyfriend has been tripping balls for the last 10 minutes, thinking Hans Gruber has come to avenge his own death against an 11-month-old!”
Sophie steps between Bailey and I, patting me on the head. “Zeppo, we can call it Nakatomi Plaza.” She claps her hands and bounces on her feet. “Fuck, we are gonna sell the shit out of this strain!”
“Ernie, you said Hans Gruber claimed Shon killed him?” I nod at Moshe, wrapping my arms around Bailey and burying my face in her stomach. I feel…unsettled. “Did you hear that, Ser? Our baby boy is already a criminal mastermind!”
Bailey threads her fingers through my hair over and over. It’s calming. Soothing. I purr, squeezing her tighter. “Ern, you, ok?”
“I am. I am the most ok I’ve ever been. We’re getting married.”
“We are?” She chuckles, tilting my head back with her thumb under my chin. Her face is lit up, eyes glittering with amusement.
“Yes. As fast as possible.”
“Why’s that?”
“Because…I love you. And I want the rest of our lives to begin right now. I don’t want to wait for “right” conditions. Marrying you, under any circumstances, is the best day of my life.”
“So, you’ll give up the silly notion that you should put your own life on hold for everyone else, or you don’t have enough money, or the right home, or education—”
“You are really fucking dumb.” Ezra smacks my shoulder.
Bailey growls, “He is NOT. Ernie is amazing. And selfless. And giving. And he penises exceptionally well.” I feel my entire body heat from her praise.
Zilv smacks his hand off the coffee table. “Yes, yes, we are a family of exceptional penises...penisers?”
I stand up on shaky legs, that weed is potent, and grab Bailey’s hand. Dragging her behind me, I move us toward the hallway to leave the entertainment room. “Uh, Ernie? Where are we going?”
“To get married. Right now.”
“Well,” She tugs on my hand and pulls me to an abrupt stop. “it’s like 10 o’clock at night and also, you pissed your pants again.” I glance down and find the front of my pants wet.
“Yes, it appears I have.” I resume pulling her, “Change of plans, we’ll go home, I’ll shower, fuck you with my exceptional penis until we fall asleep, then we’ll go to the courthouse tomorrow and you’re gonna marry me. Someone call my brother and sister and tell them to get here right away.”
Bailey giggles girlishly as we make our way through the family compound. “I love it when you take charge.” She clears her throat a moment later, “But you should probably see the doctor about how often you piss yourself under the influence.”