Chapter Twenty-Three
Denis
I had little desire to have a conversation with Rip about his husband, so for the following month, I stayed friendly but aloof.
The times he approached me about getting together for a talk, or to have me over for dinner or drinks, I made excuses.
I smiled and said all the nice things, made small talk about games, but stayed in my own happiness bubble, which had room for only two people: Sterling and myself.
Rip was no fool, and on our away trip, after winning against the LA Seals, he cornered me in the locker-room bathroom.
“Can you give me a minute, please?”
Naked and dripping wet from the shower, I pulled a towel around my waist. “About what?”
He worked his jaw. “Come on, man. You know what.”
I squeezed the water out of my hair and peered in the mirror. “Obviously not, since I’m asking.” I sure as hell wasn’t about to give him the upper hand and mention his back-stabbing husband’s ugly insinuation.
“Adrian feels terrible.”
“Ahhh, and it’s all about pauvre Adrian.
Quel dommage. His feelings are hurt?” I poked Rip in the chest. Other members of the team gave us the side-eye but wisely didn’t interrupt and gave us a wide berth as they exited the shower area, leaving Rip and me alone.
“And what he said to Sterling about me, someone he invited to your wedding, claiming we were friends and the past was the past, that was nothing? I should ignore it because…why? I said something stupid to you that most likely I would never have gone through with. For whatever reason, Adrian felt he had to warn Sterling about me?”
My thumping heart and pulse made me see spots, but I drew on my newfound strength in the relationship I was building with Sterling to use my words in a helpful manner and not be ugly and cutting.
“What do you want me to do?”
“Nothing. I am hurt. Very, very hurt that someone who acted like a friend would almost ruin a potential relationship. And I don’t understand what he’d hoped to accomplish, but he failed. Sterling and I are together.”
“You might not believe it, but I’m glad to hear that. Can we discuss this after you get dressed? I’ve been waiting for you for half an hour, and I’m sweating my balls off from the humidity in here.”
I refrained from making a snarky comment about how I was surprised he’d forgotten I liked to take very hot, long showers and merely nodded. “Give me a few minutes to dry my hair and get dressed.”
I didn’t have time to call Sterling, who’d also admitted he and Adrian had been awkward with each other, but I did text him that Rip asked for a sit-down. Sterling quickly answered.
Don’t lose your temper. Be nice.
My lips twitched. I’m always nice.
Rip waited for me outside the locker room, and I observed him with a frown—he was texting rapidly.
“Problem?” I strolled up to him, and he pocketed the phone.
“Nope. All good. Where should we go? The hotel restaurant?”
I waved my hand in front of us. “Lead the way.”
When we walked into the restaurant, the hostess greeted us. The room was half-full even at this late hour. I saw several teammates, including Seb, who continued to drink his beer but gave me a side-eye.
“Table for two?”
“In the back, please,” I asked before Rip could open his mouth.
“Of course.” We followed her to a square table for two in the corner. “Zeke will be your server and will be right over to take your drink order.”
We sat opposite each other, and Rip played with his wedding band, spinning it around and around on his finger. Finally, I had to break the silence.
“You look good,” I said. “Happy.”
Was that relief I saw flash in his eyes? Maybe he thought I’d come out swinging, but I decided to wait and allow him to make the first move.
“I am. Very. You look well too.”
“I am. Very,” I echoed.
“So, uh, you and Sterling are together?” At my nod, he smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “I’m glad for you. I wanted you to find someone.”
Funny thing was, I believed him. “Thank you.”
“Although,” he continued with a chuckle, “I am a little surprised it’s him, simply because the two of you couldn’t stand each other.”
My smile was serene. “We’ve made la paix.”
“Make love not war, huh?” Rip joked.
“Something like that.” I didn’t feel the need to go into a deep explanation of my relationship. Rip and I were friendly, but I wasn’t about to share my feelings with him. Ex-lovers only went so far.
Zeke, our server, approached, and we ordered beers.
Again, I waited for Rip to speak.
“So, uh, I figured it’s about time we hashed this out so we can return to normal.”
“Hash it out?” I quirked a brow. “What do you mean?” No, I wasn’t going to make it easy for him. It was his husband who’d stuck his pretty nose into my business.
The beers came, and Zeke hovered, pouring us ice water and getting us napkins and coasters. He was a young guy, in his twenties, and from how his gaze lingered on Rip and me, a bit starstruck.
“Can I, uh, get you gentlemen any food? Great game, by the way. I’m originally from the city and a big Blades fan.”
“Thank you, that’s great to hear,” I replied. “I’ll have the chicken sandwich, no mayonnaise please.”
“Burger and fries for me. And thanks.” Rip smiled, and Zeke left us.
“So you were saying…” I took a sip of my beer.
“Okay. Look. I didn’t know Adrian planned on saying what he did.
And frankly, I think he was wrong—it was none of his business.
Whatever you and I went through, it’s done with and we’ve moved on.
I know he needs to speak to you and apologize himself, and I’m not here to pressure you to accept it, but I wanted the two of us to get back to normal at the rink and not have this hanging over our heads. ”
“Damn, Rip, take a breath.” When he didn’t respond, I clasped my hands together on top of the table. “I was offended. And blindsided that Adrian would do that to me. It felt like he was trying to sabotage my relationship with Sterling, which he almost did.”
“Not to defend him, but I think Adrian was looking out for Sterling as a friend.”
“By sabotaging a potential relationship and making it seem like I’m some sort of…I don’t know, sexual deviant or predator? Which, by the way, having a threesome is so not.”
His cheeks turned red. “Yeah, I’m aware. I guess he’s a little sheltered. But please don’t think I had anything to do with it. Honestly, I think it was pretty damn funny—not that I wasn’t pissed at you at the time, but now?” He shrugged. “You were like a bad actor in a cheesy movie, dude.”
I snickered. “And here I thought I was being seductive and persuasive.”
“Maybe to someone who didn’t know you as well as I did. And by that time I was in so deep with Adrian that whatever you said didn’t matter.”
Our food came, but neither of us made a move to eat.
“I understand.”
Rip studied my face, and a tiny smile played along his lips. “You know…I think you finally do. You’re serious with Sterling.” Not a question, so I didn’t need to answer. I picked a fry off his plate and dipped it in ketchup. He huffed. “I always hated it when you did that.”
I grinned. “I know.”
Rip rolled his eyes and took several bites of his burger before resuming the conversation. “So, you and me. We’re good? No more avoiding me?”
I didn’t want to be at odds with Rip anymore.
It made me an ugly, unhappy person who lashed out and was cruel and thoughtless.
I didn’t like myself, or anyone else, for that matter.
The enemy was from within. Maybe the injury had exposed a vulnerability I wasn’t aware of and shattered my cocky sense of invincibility.
All I knew was that I no longer wanted to be that man.
I put down my sandwich. “Ne t’inquiète pas. It’s all good between us.”
“And Adrian?”
“Another story. He and I? Non.” I shook my head. “Je suis pas prêt à lui pardoner. He and I must speak face-to-face.”
“I think that’s a good idea. When we get home tomorrow?”
I knew he was eager to put this to bed, but I grimaced. “C’mon. It’s a long flight. Let’s do it on the weekend, when Sterling and Adrian don’t have work the next day. Our next game isn’t until Sunday night, so how about Saturday afternoon after practice?”
“I’m sure that’ll be fine.”
“?a va. Are you finished?” He nodded, and I called over the waiter. “Put this on my bill. I’ll charge it to the room.”
“Yes, sir. Can I have your room number?” He bit his lip and gave me a sweet, lingering smile that left little to the imagination as to what he desired.
From the corner of my eye, I spied Rip watching our exchange with interest. In the past, I would’ve dropped an innuendo or even waited around for his shift to end and personally shown him the way to my room. But now I had Sterling and zero interest in having anyone in my bed other than him.
“It’s 1045.”
Rip pulled out his wallet. “Here’s the tip in cash.” He handed Zeke a hundred, and the kid’s eyes almost popped out of his skull.
“Oh, my God. Wow. Thank you so much. Could I possibly get both your autographs?”
We scribbled our names on his order pad, and I added, To Zeke, the best waiter in LA, then posed for some pictures. By the time we finished, I was tired and grouchy because I knew with the time difference, I wouldn’t be able to talk to Sterling until tomorrow.
“This sucks,” I grumbled on our way up to our rooms.
“What?”
“The fact that we’re three hours behind at home.”
“Sterling?”
I nodded. “I haven’t talked to him all day.”
“I miss Adrian too.”
The elevator opened on our floor. Rip was two doors away from me.
“G’night, Rip.”
“You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”
I met his gaze. “Yeah. And this time I know the difference.”
“I believe you do.” He smiled. “See you in the morning. We’ve got an early flight, don’t forget.”
“Oui, oui, mon capitaine.” I saluted him and entered my room.
I undressed and got into bed, staring at the ceiling. My phone buzzed, and I saw it was Sterling. My heart raced. Was something wrong? It was three in the morning there. Why was he texting me?
“Idiot,” I murmured. “You’re acting like a schoolboy with a crush. Read it.”
Just woke up because I discovered I don’t like sleeping alone. Glad you won your game.
Sterling and I were never going to be the mushy hearts-and-flowers type, saying I love you at every turn, but I knew that was what he’d meant.
I hit the Call button. “Bonsoir, mon cher. Je te manque?”
“If you’re asking me a question, I need it in English to understand what I’m committing to.”
“Don’t you trust me?” I purred.
“Not as far as I can throw you,” he countered. “It might be something outrageous, like would I want to come home and find you naked and covered in chocolate.”
I burst out laughing. “Is that your fantasy? Because if it is…mmm. I can totally make it happen.” I hugged the pillow. “All I asked is if you missed me. You’re the one who had sexy thoughts.”
“Oh. Well, I mean, I did say it.”
“No, my love. You said you don’t like sleeping alone. That could be solved by getting a dog or cat.”
“I don’t have the time to dedicate to a pet. You take up enough of my attention.”
He was too cute, and I rolled on my side, hating the empty expanse of the king-sized bed. “Then may I suggest a Denis-sized pillow. Extra, extra-large, of course.” I smirked, and as usual, Sterling had a comeback ready.
“Obviously, to contain that massive ego.”
“That’s not all that’s massive, mon c?ur.” I waited a moment. “I do miss you,” I murmured.
“I miss you too,” he whispered back. “Good night, Denis.”
“Night.”
I fell asleep with a smile on my face.