Chapter 23
James followed me into the bathroom, stepping around me to turn on the water.
“Arms up,” he ordered, determination in his eyes.
“I can do it myself,” I protested, wrapping my arms around my middle. I already felt exposed. I had no qualms about being naked, but in that moment, I needed to hold on to every little bit of control I could get. However, with James, giving up control was easy. I don’t know why I ever questioned it—questioned him . He’d proved himself time and time again and yet, I fought him left and right.
Maybe it was time to stop.
“I know you can, love,” he said with a smile, “but you don’t have to. Especially when you’ve got the man you love to do it for you.”
I rolled my eyes, then yelped as his icy fingers slipped beneath my shirt and grazed my bare skin. “If you’re going to keep teasing me about it, I’ll take it back.”
But I lifted my arms as he worked my sweater off me. “Say it again. Please.”
The heavy, wet fabric hit the tiled floor with a plop . James’s hands dropped to my belt but for the first time in our relationship, I kept my eyes on his. “I love you.” The words felt strange on my lips, barely more than a whisper. I hadn’t said them to a partner since Erin.
Quick, talented fingers worked my belt loose. “Again,” he pleaded.
“I love you.”
Our lips met. His hands worked my jeans open, peeling the wet denim down my thighs.
“I love you,” I gasped, coming up for air.
James dropped to his knees, working the laces open on my boots. First the left, and I kicked free, then the right. He reached up, hooking his fingers behind the waistband of my underwear and stripping me of those as well. My hard cock sprang free and bobbed in front of his mouth. He licked his lips, hungry eyes finding mine.
“I love you.” My voice was raspy now, thick with desire.
Deeming my offer sufficient, his tongue darted out to lick the head. I hissed and shuffled on the spot, only to groan in protest when he pulled off and straightened to his full height.
“I love you too,” he returned, wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me in for another kiss. Our bodies flush together, my dick ground against the rough denim of his pants. “And I’m going to take my time with you tonight.” He brushed his nose against mine. “I’m going to spend hours showing you how much I love you.”
James moved away and I whimpered at the loss. He stripped, indicating the shower. “Get in.”
I considered being a brat and disobeying him just to see what would happen, but the thought of that shower was too inviting and without James’s body heat, I was shivering.
So, I did the only thing I could do: I did as I was told .
I moaned at the warm water on my skin—though it wasn’t hot enough for my liking. I reached for the knob, but James caught my hand midair. “Slowly. You want to ease yourself into it.”
I relaxed into his arms, knowing that he wasn’t just talking about hot water. With my eyes closed, I let him smooth his hands over my body as the spray wetted my hair. The new length would take some getting used to.
“I love the new hair,” he murmured in my ear, sliding his fingers through the wet strands to feel for himself.
“I was starting to think you hadn’t noticed.”
“What I noticed is that you’re still in the safe zone because I still have plenty to grab onto.” He proved his point, clenching a handful in his fist. I hissed at the sting—but my cock loved it. “Hands on the wall, love.”
I obeyed, splaying my hands across the tile in front of me. James pressed in close to my back, and his thick length against my crease had me fighting the urge to buck backward.
“I know what you’re thinking,” he teased, rubbing his hands over my waist, “but I need you to be patient. I promise it’ll be worth it.”
Part of me wanted to fight him, to fuck myself against him until he painted my back with his release. Instead, I rested my forehead against the slick tile, relishing in his hands exploring my body. James used his lips and fingers to map out every inch of my skin while the water thawed the icy chill in my bones, only pausing to gradually increase the temperature of the water.
He trailed soft kisses over my shoulders, down the center of my back, and along my spine. He sank to his knees, large hands kneading my ass and pulling my cheeks apart to tease between them. I rocked back into his touch—only for him to shove me forward .
“Easy, love,” he said. “This shower is about warming you up, nothing more.”
The water became hotter, and so did my skin. James’s fingers dipped down, teasing between my legs but staying tantalizingly out of reach. Every time I tried to arch into his touch, he stopped until I stood still again.
It was torture.
My cock hung heavy between my thighs. Sweat beaded on my forehead, but whether from the hot water or my building orgasm I wasn’t sure. Finally, James took mercy on me. He reached around me again, turning the water off this time, and guided me out of the shower. After scrubbing us both dry with a towel, he silently indicated the door.
Something about that moment felt far more significant than any night we’d ever shared. I left the bathroom and walked down the hall to the master bedroom, James’s commanding presence behind me. Once inside, I hovered awkwardly next to the bed, unsure of what he wanted me to do next. Lucky for me, I didn’t need to figure it out. James wrapped his arms around my waist, taking control. My hands found his, fingers twisting together over the soft skin of my stomach.
It was intense already—almost too intense. My heart was on my sleeve, and those emotions I’d been working so hard to suppress felt exposed, but I couldn’t ignore them any longer. I sighed, dropping my head against his shoulder and exposing my neck for him. His lips dusted across my collarbone, pausing over my carotid. It pulsed, thumping under his mouth. Fangs tickled my skin. “May I?”
I nodded, gulping. “Yes.”
“Do you want me to take my chain off?”
I squeezed my eyes shut and thrashed my head side to side. Without that, I could turn. No, I wasn’t ready for that. Telling him I loved him was already too much. “N-no. ”
“Okay, love,” he hushed, giving my hands a squeeze and pulling me closer to him. “That’s why I asked. You’ve got total control. I don’t want you to forget that. Do you understand?”
I don’t know how he expected me to speak. It felt like he’d reached into my chest and wrapped his vampiric fist around my heart. I could barely breathe. Working one of my hands free, I threaded my fingers through his hair, pulling him closer to my neck. “Please— oh .”
Cold, sharp fangs sank into my skin. My legs buckled, James’s arm tightening to stabilize me. A low moan rattled his chest as he took one slow draw, then licked over the spot to seal the wound. I didn’t think I’d ever tire of him feeding from me, but one pull definitely wasn’t enough.
“I want you present for this, love.” He kissed his mark, then retreated a step. “Get on the bed for me. On your back. I want to see you—all of you.”
Complying, I positioned myself in the middle of the mattress and situated the pillows under my head so I could keep my eyes on him. James rounded the bed, fisting his erection. My mouth watered. He produced a bottle of lube from somewhere— I’d been so caught up I hadn’t even seen him grab it—and tossed it on the bed. His gaze traveled over me, taking in every inch of my naked body. I fought an unusual urge to squirm and cover myself. I felt too exposed.
James picked up on it. “Put your hands behind your head.”
I obeyed, drawing my bottom lip between my teeth as he placed a knee on the bed. He moved like a predator hunting its prey. The nerves fluttering through my body surrendered to instinct, and I widened my legs to give him space to settle between them. He stretched out, aligning our bodies from head to toe.
“You look absolutely breathtaking right now, Ryder,” he husked .
I couldn’t answer. I released my lip, tipping my head back and thank fuck he could read what I wanted: our mouths met, unleashing the beast. James ground his hips into mine, swallowing the moans I fed him. His tongue speared inside my mouth, twisting and tangling with mine in a messy kiss. One of his hands held his weight on one side of my head, the other teased down my stomach and dipped between my legs.
When did he open the bottle?
Cool, slick fingers slipped between my cheeks. I tensed at the initial sensation, but James distracted me by sucking on my tongue—a move he knew drove me wild. I chased him when he pulled back, whimpering in protest at the broken kiss.
“Relax for me, love,” he whispered against my lips, middle finger slowly rimming my hole. “Breathe in.”
I did.
“And out.”
James pushed through with one finger at the same time, gently shushing me when I cried out. He slowly worked me open with one finger before adding a second. I silently begged for his mouth. I needed it—I needed him, however he would give himself to me. With two fingers buried to his knuckles, he granted me his mouth once more. I rocked my hips into his hand, dick hard and leaking over my stomach.
I liked it rough—two fingers were usually plenty before I got impatient and demanded his cock. My heart raced, anticipating his thick length—only to get a third finger instead. I saw stars when he crooked them, grazing my sweet spot. Tears burned behind my eyes, and I squeezed them shut.
“You’re doing so good, love,” James praised, latching onto my neck.
I moaned, sputtering out a desperate, “P-please baby,” as my body rolled into his. His erection pressed against my hip, precome wetting my skin and creating a slick glide between us .
“Are you ready?” he asked, tapping my prostate again.
“I’ve been ready,” I panted, thoroughly at the end of my rope. I needed him now .
James stamped one more kiss to my cheek, then moved between my legs. He bent mine at the knees and pushed until my thighs touched my chest. His eyes turned hungry. “You look so good right now… so mine .” He growled the last word, and it sent shivers through my body.
Before I could beg more, he leaned over me and captured my mouth, lining his cockhead up with my entrance. The wide head pushed against my hole, and suddenly those three fingers didn’t feel like enough. I tightened up again, and he slid his length along my crease until the tension released from my body.
“Good boy,” he cooed, choosing that precise moment to pump his hips forward.
I wasn’t sure whether the desperate sound I made was a result of the praise or his cock—or both. But I fought to keep my hands in place. Each rock of his hips sent him deeper inside me. I craved the burn, holding my breath until it swelled to full . He released the grip on his erection, bottoming out so our hips met, and pulling me close with the same hand.
I was panting hard, lips brushing his. “I love you,” I gasped. It turned into a moan when he circled his hips and his cock moved inside me.
“I love you too.” He smiled against my mouth. “You can do this, love. I know it’s intense, but I’m right here with you.”
My entire body quivered. I hooked my ankles behind his back, holding him deep inside me. “I don’t think I’ll last long.”
Thankfully he answered me by sliding partially out before thrusting back in, picking up his pace with each cycle.
“Do you trust me not to bite you?” he asked, straining through the effort of holding back his orgasm.
I gave him a sharp nod. “I trust you with my life. ”
“ Fuck, Ryder.”
I reached behind his neck, fingering the clasp on the chain until it fell onto my chest. I threw it across the room, bracing myself. James drizzled more lube between us, then he drove into me hard and fast. The burn was unlike anything I’d ever felt. I was fuller than I’d ever been. I gasped, the room silent except for the slap of skin against skin. My cries turned into screams that reverberated off the walls as James reached an inhuman speed.
My stomach flipped, my lungs ached for air. I bucked against his hips, my cock desperate for friction even while knowing he could make me come hands-free in half a second.
And with one expert swivel of his hips, he did.
My cock spurted between us, painting our chests with my release. James fucked me right through it, drawing out the aftershocks until I trembled like a leaf beneath him. His mouth met my neck, and a brief surge of fear shot through me. I was certain he was about to bite me.
Trust.
He sealed his lips over his mark and sucked, deepening the bruise without puncturing my skin.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and held him close, letting him suck on the bite mark as much as he fucking wanted. With one more, hushed, “I love you,” into his ear, he growled against my skin, his cock pulsing inside me. He came in a hot rush, shaking in my arms. I repeated the phrase over and over as I combed through his hair, holding him close. I fought to catch my breath, resting my forehead against his temple. By the time he stopped sucking, the hickey on my neck was dark purple and angry, and it was only when he brushed his thumbs across my cheeks that I realized I’d been crying.
James brushed the tears away, soothing me and keeping me close to his chest until they dried. “Thank you,” he whispered .
“Why are you thanking me?”
A soft touch of his lips to my forehead, my cheeks, then finally my mouth. “For trusting me.”