The Villain

08. If Only

South

Packing up my things has taken a lot less time than I thought it would. I have the few things I need from the apartment I’ve lived in for the last few years. I don’t trust anyone with my figurines. The other shit can be picked up by the moving company.

Everything is done and loaded securely in the bed of my truck in less than a day. It will take me three to drive back. It’s fucking ridiculous.

I’m halfway back with my loot when my phone starts ringing. Tera. I thought she was still ‘sick’? Did things go bad with her men?

“What’s wrong?” I ask immediately.

She sighs so heavily I can practically feel the rush of air through the phone.

“Ter-bear?” She likes the nickname. It makes her feel closer to me when she can’t reach out and touch me.

“You’re on speaker on my end,” she says softly. “Asher, Max, and Trevor are with me.”

“Ok.” So, not a problem with her men. What the fuck? Is this a meeting of the minds? I don’t see that going well.

“Just full awareness, you know?”

“I appreciate it.” No one knows my hang ups better than Tera.

“I’ve told them to be silent.”

Not a meeting of the minds then. What is going on?

“Ter-bear. Tell me what’s wrong.”

“You sound like you’re in a car? Did you rent another one? Where are you?”

“Halfway back to you in my truck, now stop deflecting.” I keep my voice calm in the hopes that she’ll get to the point soon and I’ll have a person to take her issues out on. I’ve been more irate than usual. The violence might put me back on track.

She sighs heavily again. I decide to wait her out. It’s not like I can walk away as I go seventy down the highway.

“You were supposed to take me with you,” she suddenly whines. It sounds like she’s about to burst into tears. I should have known she would be upset about it. She likes being included in even the most tedious jobs simply to feel helpful.

“I wouldn’t take you down your driveway while you’re sick, much less halfway across the US. You’re fucking high if you think that.”

“You could have waited,” she pouts.

“I could have, but then I wouldn’t be able to surprise you.” If I get it out of the way now, she’ll have less things to bring up as a distraction.

“What do you mean?” She asks cautiously.

“The house will be ready in about two weeks.”

“Really?” She gasps and I can see her in my mind’s eye, bouncing for joy.

“Really. No more delaying. What’s wrong?”

“Shade wants to meet up with you.” She sounds very hesitant about it.

“Why?” I can’t think of a single reason for it. He told me to stop.

“I think he misses you.”

I stare at the screen on the dashboard for a full minute. I miss him too. But, I’m psychotic. What’s his excuse?

“That makes no sense.”

He’s having regrets? I don’t mind it but it’s not a normal pattern of behavior. Another little puzzle piece to my statue.

“I don’t think he really wanted you to stop following him when he said it. He was just acting like a jerk and you actually listened to him without arguing. He’s not used to that.”

“I can imagine.”

How he fell for two assholes without seeing the millions of red flags I’ll never know. Now she thinks he misses me? It sounds far-fetched. Even if I want it to be true. This is another Tera on a happily ever after mission. I can practically smell it.

“He needs therapy.”

“He needs social interaction,” she protests with a frustrated sigh.

“Group therapy then.”

A masculine voice interrupts with angry frustration, “He’s calling her at all hours of the morning and giving her shit because you aren’t following him anymore. Meet up with him so he’ll fuck off!”

An argument erupts between the three guys as Tera apologizes to me over and over about Max not keeping his mouth shut.

“How many times?” My tone may not be able to change but my voice gets gritty with emotion. Namely rage. I can’t catch my breath. My foot gets heavier on the pedal as the need to get back to her rises.

My statue thought he could treat her like shit and Tera was hiding it from me? No fucking chance. I’m not sure which one of them has irritated me more but I’ll have it figured out by the time I get there.

It goes quiet on the other side of the line.

“I know you’re mad,” Tera tries to soothe. “Pull over before you get a speeding ticket.”

I pull off into a truck stop and try to breathe my way through the anger. How dare he misbehave like this as soon as I leave. What is he thinking?

“Ok, so he misses you.”

“I won’t miss,” I assure her grimly. I have to clear my throat to keep my voice going.

Is this how he normally behaves? If so he has a serious conversation coming his way. I can tolerate a fuck ton of things but not anyone harassing Tera. If she starts her smile/cry shit I will lose my control.

“No killing. He wants to meet up.”

“I’ll meet up with him.”

“No hitting and no breaking.”

I stay silent on that one. I’m angry of course. My one vibrant emotion kicking everything else out for the moment. I’m saying all the things I would normally, but for some reason I’m not feeling them like I would before.

He’s broken me. I’ve seen real colors now that I know he exists and my mind was warped by the intensity of it.

“I’ll be very upset if you hurt my big brother, South.”

I’m starting to think I couldn’t even if he earned it. I feel odd at the knowledge. An emotion I’ve never had before trying to build up. What is that?

I clear my throat again to try and sound calm when I say, “Fine.”

“Ok,” she lets out a relieved sigh. “I think he wants to be friends.”

I can’t think of a decent thing to say. He wants to be friends and I want to fuck him on the nearest surface just to see if I can shock his mask of nothing off. I want to tie him to my bed so he can never leave. I’d have to gag him though.

“Can you meet him somewhere? I’d like for you two to get along.”

“He’s on a bad path for that,” I mutter.

I’m still angry with him. He’s not going to get away with treating Tera badly. After a little thought I know the perfect, neutral, public place. I do my best to not make a public spectacle of myself. If he pushes me too far I’ll be more cautious.

“The coffee shop he likes.”

“Yay,” she celebrates with excitement. I’ll be that excited when I force him to apologize to her. Probably more so depending on how much persuasion he needs. “What time should I tell him?”

“Two am. He wants to fuck with your sleep-”

“Southie, no,” Tera says firmly.

“I’d be happy to wake him up.” She has no idea how happy. I won’t tell her how I’d do it either.

“No!” She lets out a frustrated sound.

I let out a deep breath and regain my runaway thoughts. Strangely it’s the thought of actually meeting him face to face that helps me calm. My world is getting a little brighter.

“I’ll behave.” I give in. I want this. Badly.

My sudden turnaround eases whatever anxieties I’ve worked up in her.

“How about eight? Maybe ten? You can get some caffeine,” she wheedles to try and sweeten the deal. Like coffee will make me accept a person. She’s so odd and hopeful all the time.

But I said I would behave and I meant it. I can behave. I won’t overwhelm him and make him run.

My shoulders drop back down and my breathing evens out. “Let him decide. Day after tomorrow.”

“You won’t be back tonight?” She sounds disappointed.

“If teleportation was real,” I sigh, watching cars go past me on the highway. If it was, I'd be punishing Shade now instead of having to wait. I have the gut feeling I’ll lose my anger the longer it takes.

She giggles, “I know, right?”

“Are you feeling any better?” I change the subject abruptly. I wonder how far along she is. I can’t remember when the morning sickness stopped for my mom. I need to get a book on this shit.

“Yeah. Asher makes the best soup,” she sighs dreamily.

“Good.”

“I can’t wait for you to meet them.”

“I doubt they feel the same.”

“Asher likes you already,” she assures me. “You threatened to kill Shade so you’re practically best friends.”

“Then he’s acceptable.”

She laughs outright for that and several voices join her.

“You’re the best Southie.”

“You’re delusional. Go back to bed.”

She laughs and sweetly says goodbye.

Shade

I pick it up before it finishes the first ring.

“Well?” I demand.

“The coffee shop the day after tomorrow. She said you can pick the time.” Tera sounds exhausted and my conscience hits me. I deflect it and keep going.

“Five thirty.”

“Ok,” she sighs. “I’m going to give you a few warnings.”

“Ok?” I try to sound impatient but inside I’m all ears. Any info I can get is good info. I haven’t been able to find shit about her. I’m looking forward to cloning her phone so I get full access. She just thinks she knows how to stalk someone.

“She’s not happy that you’ve been interrupting my sleep and she wants you dead over it.”

That’s… not good.

Shit.

“She said she would behave but don’t push it, Shade. She’s going to be tired and cranky.”

“Should I make it later?” I ask defensively.

What the fuck am I doing? I never backtrack with Tera or anyone else yet I’m quick to change things around for her?

“It won’t help,” she assures me.

“She’s ready to gut you,” Max laughs.

“Why am I on speakerphone?” I grit out. If she didn’t have something I wanted I would hang up right now. She usually warns me when the line isn’t safe.

“Because I want witnesses to you being weird. Why are you so obsessed all of a sudden? You wanted her gone and she listened to you. She hasn’t done anything, and I’ve apologized a million times for asking her to do it.”

That’s just it. She listened to me. I’ve been regretting it ever since. I’ve been trained that my demands won’t get met so this threw me. A lot.

I thought she wouldn’t care. That she would keep on doing it whether I liked it or not. I was a job that she was refusing to quit because it was easy. I could fuck with her, just like she was with me. It would prove she was like everyone else and I was nothing to her. Obsession over.

Talking to Tera when she called to vent about me making her leave proved me wrong.

South was serious about it. She was losing sleep following me around and trying to work at the same time. All the expensive fucking drinks every morning and I never thanked her. All the random food deliveries weren’t Tera, like I thought. She had no idea what I was talking about when I brought up her not needing to do it anymore.

It was all South. Doing her best to take care of me while obeying Tera’s no contact rule. I wish Tera had never given her that one. Would she have talked to me? I won’t know until I meet her.

When I don’t answer, Tera gets firm with me. “Ok, be on your best behavior. No insults. No telling her to eff off because she will. She won’t hesitate.”

“What the fuck am I supposed to talk about?” I blurt out without thinking it through.

“You don’t have a plan?” Max sounds like he can’t catch his breath for all the laughter.

“Why are you meeting her if you don’t have a plan?” Tera asks in a bewildered tone.

I just want to see her. Face to face and not teasing each other with hide and seek the stalker version. I want to know her. To have her attention on me to see if it’s as good as I think it is or if I’m deluding myself. I want everything .

“Do you like her?” Tera sounds like she’s getting excited.

“I guess,” I grumble. Yeah, I like her. She’s a complete stranger and I feel more for her than I did in my past relationship. “This isn’t good, Tera.”

She ignores my wary tone. “Ok, so don’t dress up or anything.”

“I wasn’t planning on it.”

“Be yourself, the edited version.”

“That’s not being myself.”

“Do not ask about her voice.”

“What?” I sit back in my computer chair and fiddle with the figurine in my hand. The baristas said something about it, too.

“She has partial paralysis of her vocal cords. It makes her sound breathy and kind of flat. Sometimes her voice gives out, too. Or she has to clear her throat a lot.”

“It really is weird,” Max pipes up again. “Fair warning, she sounds like a cross between a heavy breather and a smoker with zero emotion.”

“Don’t make fun of her, Max. She can’t help it.”

I don’t know what to say to that. The questions about her are piling up and if I don’t get answers soon I’m going to explode. Was she bullied for it? Is that why she’s psycho? It seems plausible.

“Tell me honestly. Real talk. Is she a main character or a sidekick?”

“What?” Max laughs in confusion.

“Shut up, Max,” Asher says flatly.

The idea that people are living out their own books is ridiculous to me. Tera swears by it. If I’m a sidekick a relationship won’t work unless South is a sidekick too. Main characters don’t go with sidekicks. Why the fucking twins are main characters I have no clue. Tera said it was because they’re names were unusual.

Fuck, South is an unusual name.

Why am I thinking about this? It’s complete bullshit.

The pause before she answers makes my brows go up as I wait impatiently. She categorized herself as a sidekick to Andi’s main character before. She graduated to main character status through tragedy. She said I’m a sidekick. What am I dealing with here? What are my odds?

“She’s a super villain, Shade. There aren’t rules for villains. They break them all. I guess that would make me her henchman, huh? I never thought about that before.”

What the fuck have I gotten myself into? And why am I more excited now?