Chapter 25
Soft light streamed through the window, making Julian blink as he opened his eyes.
Where am I?
His thoughts were all muddled as he felt soft pricking of hay beneath his body. His limbs were all achy from a night on the hay, and the events of the previous day came flooding back.
Lily.
He turned his head to the side as he became aware of the weight on his arm.
Lily lay sleeping peacefully at his side, her body tucked into his with her head in the crook of his arm. Her features were serenely beautiful in the soft morning light, bringing a smile to Julian’s lips as he reached up and gently stroked her cheek.
The sound of birds chirping outside in the freshly washed world made the moment even sweeter, and he felt as if things could not get any better.
I have to tell her how I feel.
The thought scared him a little, but not as much as the thought of never telling her that she was all he ever thought of.
He could hardly recall a time in his life when she was not around.
It sounded absurd given the short time he had known her, yet nothing else seemed to matter in the face of having her by his side for the rest of his life.
She meant more to him than Anne ever had. It scared him how much and how deeply he genuinely cared for her. There was far more at stake than there had been with Anne, but he reminded himself that Lily was not Anne.
Lily was kind, gracious, loving, forgiving, and a bit na?ve when it came to believing the best in others. All of those things made her far worthier of his love than any other woman he had ever met.
Shifting a little closer to her face, he moved the tips of his fingers over her cheek before turning to use the back of his knuckles. Her skin was softer than the skin of a peach. Perfect in every way possible, just like the rest of her.
She stirred slightly in her sleep and sighed contentedly as if she were dreaming.
God help me, I love her.
Julian felt his chest clench when a single curl fell over her face, prompting him to shift it aside.
Stirring again, she opened his eyes this time, blinking away the sleep that had claimed her for so many hours. He expected her to move away, but she just lay there, staring at him with that peaceful look in her eyes.
“Good morning,” she said in a thick, sleepy voice that tugged at his heart.
“Good morning.” The breath moved effortlessly through his chest as if he were breathing her in.
She shifted a little, angling her head toward his. “When did we fall asleep?” Her eyes dropped to his lips for a mere moment before meeting his gaze again.
“I am not certain. The storm was raging quite badly at one point, and then…” He hesitated to say that she had jumped into his arms, willingly allowing him to embrace her against his chest.
Her eyes opened a little wider as if she suddenly recalled, but she stayed where she was, close enough for her lips to press against his.
Does she want me to kiss her?
His breath suddenly stilled in his chest when her lips parted with what seemed like a silent gasp. He inched his face closer to hers, taking in the soft lavender scent of her curls. If she had remembered what had happened between them, it had not made her move away from him.
Did that mean that she felt something for him? His pulse began to race with anticipation when she mimicked his motion and moved a little closer.
Her breath moved over his lips, inviting him in like a fresh summer’s breeze after a warm day. “Julian…” She whispered as her eyes fluttered shut, allowing her lashes to kiss the top of her cheeks.
Finally.
His heart unclenched, releasing all the tension from his body as his lips brushed hers, softer than the day before, but more meaningful and slower. Closing his eyes, he felt their bodies finally breathing together.
The sound of horses’ hooves beating against the wet and muddy earth made their eyes shoot open at the same time. Someone was close to the mill, close enough for the sounds of worried voices to carry through the air.
“They must have come looking for us,” he quickly said as Lily began to back away from him.
Pushing herself up with one arm, she frantically looked around. “I… I…” She began to stammer as if they had been caught red-handed.
“There is no need to panic, we will just tell them the truth. We were waiting out the storm, and we fell asleep.” Julian reassured her, quickly coming to his feet before helping her up.
Lily dusted off her cape and began to pick the straw from her hair before fixing her skirts. She seemed flustered as she avoided looking at him, and he wondered for a moment if she regretted the almost kiss or the fact that people were coming.
“Lily, Julian, are you in there!” Arabella’s voice cut through the air, sharp and urgent, before someone pounded on the door.
“We had better let them in before they break down the door,” Julian said, pushing his confused thoughts aside.
Hurrying forward, they both reached the door at the same time before Julian unlatched and opened it.
Arabella’s eyes were wild as she burst into the mill, her gaze frantically searching for Lily before she found her. “Thank goodness!” she shouted tearfully before falling into Lily’s arms and hugging her tight. “I was so worried!”
Lily hugged her back and glanced over her shoulder, meeting Julian’s gaze just as Benedict came striding in from outside.
What does the look in her eyes mean?
Julian held her gaze, wondering if she longed to be alone with him again or resented the fact that they had come so close.
How will she react when I tell her that I love her?
***
Lily gently pulled away from Arabella and offered her a reassuring Smile. “You need not have worried, dearest Arabella. We were waiting out the storm.”
Heaving a sigh of relief, Arabella relaxed. “We thought that might have been the case, but one never knows what could happen. In any case, you are both safe, but I am certain that you are hungry.” She smiled brightly as she looked from Julian to Lily.
Lily and Julian exchanged a look before answering at the same time. “Absolutely starving.” They laughed softly as the tension between them waned, and her heart rate began to subside. They had come so close to kissing again.
Benedict nodded approvingly, seemingly oblivious to the moment that had passed between his friends.
“Splendid. Juliette and Arabella insisted on packing a picnic basket for us all. They thought perhaps that you would both be starving after spending the night in seclusion.” He looked to Arabella, who seemed to be giving Lily a strange look.
What is she thinking?
Lily’s heart began to race again when Arabella’s lips curved into a knowing smile.
Turning to the men, Arabella spoke sweetly. “Would you gentlemen be as kind as to fetch the basket and blanket for us? The world outside is still wet. I think we should rather eat in here.”
Benedict nodded immediately as if he were only too pleased to oblige her every request. “We shall be back in no time at all! Just keep in mind that Julian’s mother would like us home before too long for the ball.” He called over his shoulder.
“The ball?” Julian asked with a frown, but found himself being pulled away by Benedict.
“Tell me everything!” Arabella rounded on her in an instant, her eyes sparkling with anticipation.
Feeling flustered, Lily needed a moment to compose herself. “First, tell me about the ball. What ball do we need to attend?” She took a deep breath.
Arabelle shook her head. “Julian’s mother had the idea last night to arrange a ball since the renovations at Redding Hall are all but complete.
She rather marvelously made all of the arrangements while you and Julian were away last night.
Being only an hour away from Redding Hall, she thought that the two of you would not mind. ”
Lily forced her eyes open wider in an attempt to take in all of the information. “I do not mind. I just have not prepared a dress or anything.”
Shaking her head more vigorously, Arabella continued.
“Julian’s mother has made provision for it all.
A dress will be waiting for you at Redding Hall.
The staff are all rather marvelous as well, but what I want to know is what occurred between you and Julian last night?
You both look like two cats who got at the cream. ” She mused enthusiastically.
Lily could feel herself blushing as she drew her lower lip between her teeth and gave in. “I think I am falling in love with him, Arabella.”
Sucking in a sharp breath, Arabella seemed as if she would burst. “That is wonderful news! If I knew that this would have worked, I would have locked the two of you in a room long ago!”
“Lower your voice!” Lily laughed nervously as she glanced over her friend’s shoulder to check on the men.
Julian and Benedict seemed blissfully unaware of anything that was being said inside as they fought with the basket on the back of the horse.
Lowering her gaze back to her friend, Lily blushed. “I… I just do not know if I can trust my feelings. You know what happened with Oliver…”
Arabella softened at her words and tilted her head to the side in a sympathetic gesture. “Lily, Julian is not Oliver; you can trust your feelings. Have you told him about your past yet?”
Lily shook her head. “I wanted to last night. I have come close a few times, but we get interrupted every time. I am just concerned that he will get the wrong idea when I tell him.” Her voice filled with concern.
Reaching out, Arabella gently touched the side of her arm. “You should tell him tonight at the ball. Tell him about your feelings, why you were scared to mention Oliver, and everything. An honest conversation between the two of you is long overdue.”
“Do you really think I should?” She glanced at Oliver and Benedict again, who were heading back inside.
“I most certainly do. Find some time tonight. You will see, everything will work out as it should,” she said with an air of certainty.
The indoor picnic turned out to be a jovial event where Benedict delighted them all with tales of his past and the things he hoped to do in the future. It did not go unnoticed by Lily how Arabella hung on his every word. Yet she could not help but steal glances in Julian’s direction.
He smiled at her each time, reassuring her that telling him the truth was the right thing to do.
I will tell him tonight.
***
Lily stood in her new chambers at Redding Hall, admiring the silver ballgown that Julian’s mother had arranged for her.
The neck swooped beautifully into a beaded bodice, and the sleeves were puffed in the latest fashion.
A maid had appeared out of nowhere and did her hair, pinning the loose curls in an elaborate style to the back of her head.
She was ready for the evening ahead and the conversation she knew had to take place with Julian.
I can do this.
She gave herself one more look in the new floor-length mirror and made her way toward the door.
The repairs had turned the mansion into a bright, new jewel. Lily had hardly believed her eyes when they had arrived a few hours earlier. There were no buckets, boards, or even men at work to be seen. She stepped out into the hall and almost gasped when she came face-to-face with Eleanor.
“You look ready for this evening, my lady,” Eleanor smirked, her eyes filled with malice that had never been there before.
Does she know that Julian told me the truth?
Eleanor attempted to force a smile, but the coldness in her expression remained the same. “Miss Everet, I hope you shall enjoy this evening.”
“As do I, my lady. I hope you will not have another faux pas like you did at the duchess’s dinner.” She sneered as her lips lifted into a sardonic smile.
Lily’s blood ran cold as she realized just how wrong she had been about the woman. “Did you perhaps have anything to do with that little mishap, Miss Everet?” she asked her directly.
Huffing, Eleanor raised her shoulders. “It was only a bit of fun. I am sure you will understand. We, ladies of the ton, like to tease one another, do we not? It was a friend of mine who agreed to show you in the wrong direction, as it were.” Her laughter came out in a low, almost animalistic drone.
Feeling stunned, Lily stood rooted to the spot.
She had never, in all of her years, guessed that someone could be as cruel as that.
She pulled herself up to her full height and smiled in return.
“I cannot say that I share your sentiment, Miss Everet, but I do know that I do not appreciate it. Now, if you would kindly step aside, my husband is waiting for me downstairs. I will expect you to be gone in the morning before breakfast.”
Eleanor’s eyes flashed with anger as she set her jaw. “I would be careful if I were you, my lady. I am a beloved friend of the family. Julian’s mother and sister, and even Julian himself, would not look kindly on your words if they heard them.”
“I think it is you who is mistaken, Miss Everet. And I may not have been in London for very long, but I do know that I outrank you, and as such, I shall be taking my leave.” Lily lifted her chin defiantly in the air and began to push past Eleanor as she thought back to all the lies.
The torn dress at the wedding, the dinner, the spilled tea, and even the lies in the garden.
There was no possible way that Eleanor Everet could ever redeem herself in Lily’s eyes, no matter how trusting Lily had been in the past.
Reaching out, Eleanor placed a hand on Lily’s arm and stopped her from passing. “You will regret this, Lily, mark my words. You have no idea what is coming your way,” she hissed under her breath before letting go of Lily’s arm and heading in the opposite direction.
A chill ran down Lily’s spine, but she quickly pushed it aside when a footman came hurrying in her direction.
“I beg your pardon, my lady, I did not mean to intrude, but Miss Arabella Tremaine requested your presence in the garden.” He bowed quickly and hurried away again before Lily could ask anymore questions.
I hope nothing has happened.
Lily quickly hurried down the hall, choosing a more discreet path to the gardens as she used the servants' hallways.
She had barely stepped into the cool evening air and shut the doors behind her when a gasp escaped her throat. “Oliver!”