51. Kai
Kai
That evening we decide to spend the night in and stuff our faces with greasy delicious food that would soak up any residual alcohol.
“Delivery order for Kendall?” I joke as I walk through her back door. Lucy runs up to greet me, wagging her tail. She sniffs me and inspects the bags excitedly.
“Fuck yes, Kai! I don’t think you’d make a very good delivery man though. Pretty sure breaking and entering is frowned upon when delivering food.”
“Well, lucky for you, I’m not breaking and entering since I practically live here and have a spare key. I also come bearing gifts,” I respond.
“What else did you get?” she asks as I start opening our takeout boxes.
“Provisions.”
“What kind of provisions?” She takes the brown paper bag from my hands and dumps out its contents on the kitchen table. Ibuprofen, chocolate, and a heating pad. She looks mortified. I knew this was a bad idea.
“You said you had cramps, and I didn’t want you to be in pain or anything…” My voice trails off as I try to explain my way out of this embarrassing situation. I’m in unfamiliar territory here. Thankfully Kendall doesn’t make me feel worse about it.
“That’s really sweet, Kai,” she states, a flush creeping up her neck.
“It’s no big deal. I just didn’t want to hear you complaining all night,” I tease.
“Yeah yeah. Let’s eat. Did you by any chance get—”
“Extra chipotle aioli? Obviously. It should be at the bottom of the bag.”
“This is why we’re best friends,” she comments, snagging a French fry and tossing it in her mouth.
Best friends. So maybe she doesn’t want me to make a move.
Jenna’s probably wrong. But what if she’s right?
I wouldn’t put it past Jenna to bait me into something just to make me look like an idiot.
If there is anyone who enjoys seeing me embarrassed more than Ken, it’s Jenna.
Two hours later, I’m running out of time to make a choice.
We’re on our third episode of The Office and that’s usually when Kendall falls asleep.
She’s lying with her head on my chest, feet stretched out towards the end of the couch cuddling a blue fleece blanket.
My arm is resting on the pillow behind her and it would be easy enough to curl my arm around her or hold her hand.
“Kai, I can feel you overthinking. What’s up?”
Dammit. How does she always know?
“Nothing. What do you mean you can feel me overthinking?”
“You get inside your head too much. I can literally feel your energy and it feels stressy. Plus, your heart is pounding.”
“Sometimes it’s scary how well you know me.”
“It really is. What are you thinking about?”
“Holding your hand,” I blurt out awkwardly.
“So, stop stressing about it and just do it already.” Without hesitation, I thread my fingers through hers and she nuzzles her head under my chin.
“Isn’t this better than torturing yourself all night?”
“Will you just shut up, Kendall?” I say grinning.
I comb her hair with my fingers until my eyelids get heavy and fall asleep to the sound of her cute little snores.
I wake up and check my phone, 11:15. Shit, my parents will be wondering where I am. I sit up from the couch as quietly as I can, trying not to disturb Kendall.
“Kai, don’t go. I hate sleeping in this house alone.” She’s killing me. She could have asked me for anything right now, and I’m confident I would say yes.
“How about we go upstairs? I’ll wait to leave until you fall back asleep, or your moms get home,” I suggest.
“Mmmkay,” she whispers sleepily.
I follow her up the stairs, which is the wrong choice. She’s wearing a cropped t-shirt and tight black leggings that grip her thighs and waist in all the right places. She falls into bed and immediately starts stripping her clothing.
“Uhh,” I start to protest while fiddling with my hands.
“Relax, Kai. I’ll put on a shirt and shorts now that I know how nervous my sleep attire makes you. Besides, I doubt my moms want to come home and find me sleeping with you sans clothes, best friends or not.”
I tug at the back of my neck with my hand worriedly. “What do you mean not?”
“I don’t know, do best friends fall asleep together holding hands?”
“Maybe.”
“Okay,” she scoffs.
“What?”
“Do best friends get each other provisions to help with their period?” she demands a little louder. She sounds angry. I’m not even sure what I did.
“I don’t know, I was just trying to be nice. I would do it for Amy if she needed it too,” I reply.
“Right, because that’s how you think of me, like a sister?” she snaps.
“Kendall, we’re both tired. I’m sure your moms will be home any minute. I should just go home.”
“Nice deflection, Kai.”
“Ken,” I say quietly.
“Whatever. Just go home. I’ll see you tomorrow for the tag sale I guess.”
I have officially fucked up. I run through the scenario a million times as I walk back to my house.
Kendall and I rarely fight—but this feels like a fight to me.
I should have just kept my mouth shut. Why did I listen to Jenna?
Freaking Jenna always has to stir the pot and keep things interesting.
But I would deal with her later. One problem at a time.
Things were so simple before I started daydreaming about Kendall and punching guys on the team for wanting to sleep with her.
They are messy now. The lines are blurred.
We had made a pact. She’s the only person who gets me.
Like really gets me and still chooses to hang out with me.
I don’t think whatever this is or could be is worth jeopardizing our friendship.