Chapter 39
THIRTY-NINE
M y breathing accelerates as I blink repeatedly, thinking I haven't heard him right.
"Why? Why would you care if I give up or not?"
"Because I do not want to see you win, human," he states smoothly.
His words are like an arrow to my heart, the sharp tip penetrating deep and embedding itself in my flesh. Of all the things he could have said... I shield my face so he doesn't see the hurt reflected in my features.
God, how silly I am. How could I have seen anything good in him?
Moments pass as silence molds to the room. We all stare at one another as Ze waits for me to agree to his outrageous terms. To my greatest shame, I cannot bring myself to do it.
I sneak a glance at Thea on the floor, her face red from crying, and I still can't open my mouth to say the words. Yes, she's my friend. But Nikki... He's my everything.
Does that make me a bad person? I'm not sure. I only know that I have one limit only—my husband.
"As I suspected." Ze leans back, laughing. "You are not such a nice person now, are you, human?" he asks sarcastically. "You could not even save your friend."
"Ze, please..."
I don't get to plead my case with him because a cloud of smoke appears in the room, the messenger wraith materializing in front of us.
"Congratulations. You have passed the second trial and are officially invited to join the third one. Is there anyone who would like to withdraw?" The rehearsed speech flows out of the wraith's mouth.
Ze stares at me, his purple eyes glowing.
Does he think that tactic of intimidation will work?
"You know what you have to do," he adds in a low voice.
My hands clench into fists by my side, my anger growing by the second.
Why?
From the beginning, he's tried to make me quit, yet he's also tried to shield me from danger. Why would it matter so much to him whether I continue or not—whether I win or not? There are so many contradictory things about him that I no longer know what to believe. Was any of what he told me in the forest true? Or was it just a tactic to make me feel sorry for him? Capitalize on my empathy to get me to trust him unconditionally.
The more I find out about him, the more I think I must have been the perfect idiot for Ze to work his lies on because as it stands, I believed everything .
He was at least right about something. I am a fool. But I am a fool who learns from her mistakes.
"No," I answer, pushing my chin up. I avoid looking at Ze or at Thea, for fear my guilt might shake up my conviction. "I will continue."
"Noted." She turns to the others.
"I will continue as well," Thea answers.
It's Ze's turn to answer.
Time stops as he levels me with his intense glare. It's almost as if he's trying to communicate something but does not have the words to do so. But at this point, it's useless. He's already revealed his true colors and as far as I'm concerned, I don't care whether he continues or not as long as it's not going to be anywhere near me.
"I forfeit," he declares a second before he vanishes, this time for good.
"Noted," she quips. "And you?" She turns to Cer.
He's staring at the place that Ze vacated, indecision written all over his face. Thea grabs his hand, shaking her head at him.
"Thea..." He blinks.
"You have already risked too much, Cer. You can't afford to get caught," she whispers with a sad smile. "I can take care of myself."
"No. I will not let you do that."
"He will forfeit," Thea addresses the wraith before lowering her voice to say to Cer, "You owe me one, remember? I am claiming my boon."
His lips are compressed in a thin line as he stares at her for minutes on end.
"I will forfeit," he reluctantly utters the words, his eyes still on her.
"Noted," the wraith quips. "Congratulations," she tells the two of us. "Will you continue as a team or individually?"
"Together," Thea speaks first.
I glance at her, surprised she'd offer me this grace after failing her.
"Noted. The two of you are officially enrolled in the third trial. The destination is Aperion, House of Gaia. A portal will be opened tomorrow at midday, and you will be able to travel to your destination. The third trial will commence in a month from tomorrow, and you will receive your assignment seven days before the event. I wish you luck."
And just like that, the wraith is gone.
I slowly walk back to Thea's side.
"I'm sorry," I whisper. "I..." I swallow. How do I explain to her that I cannot give this up for anything in the world? That getting my husband back is the only thing that drives me forward. Without him... Without hope... I'm nothing.
"No. You don't have anything to be sorry for, Luce. It's not your mess. It's mine." She takes a deep breath. "I made my bed, now I need to sleep in it."
"I don't think he'll reveal your secret. If that was his intention, he would already have."
She forces a smile. "For now. He's too unpredictable. He has his interests, and if it's in his interest to reveal everything... I have no doubt he will."
"What can I do?" Cer asks, his voice tinged with worry. "Tell me what I can do to help, Thea. I can k?—"
"Do not say it," she blurts out in a panic. "You know it is treason. And that is far worse than any death."
"I do not know how to help you if you will not tell me what he has on you." He sighs.
"It is my cross to bear, Cer. But I appreciate your offer," she says with a smile. "Maybe at some point in time..." She shakes her head.
"I'll always be there for you," he murmurs, and suddenly I feel as if I'm intruding on an intimate moment between the two. "Regardless of whether I am in the game or not."
Thea sighs as she lays her back against the kitchen counter. "Now that we know the trial will be held in Aperion, I'm even happier you forfeited. You cannot get caught, Cer," she murmurs.
"I would have been careful." He purses his lips. "We have not been caught so far. It is not hard to blend in as long as we do not use our abilities."
"I won't risk it." She shakes her head, reaching out to take his hand.
"You are that worried about me?" he inquires softly. "So much so that you would use your precious boon?"
A light smile appears on her face as she squeezes his hand.
"You protect me, I protect you. That's how it will always be."
They stare at each other in silence for a moment before Thea clears her throat.
"At least Ze had the decency to leave, too. I didn't think he'd ever do that of his own volition," she mentions drily.
"I was surprised about that, too." I sigh. In a way, I'm happy he won't be around since I already decided that I didn't want to be around him. At the same time, I'm still a little disappointed. "Do you think we'll manage by ourselves?" I ask, a little scared by the upcoming game. And to top that off, we don't even know what it will entail.
"Don't worry about it, Luce. We'll manage just fine." She gives me a smile. But as she turns to her brother, a frown mars her features. "I'm confused about something, though. Wasn't Aperion off-limits for the game?"
"It used to be. After the disaster of the first Wishing Game, it was decreed that Aperion was off-limits for any future competition." He nods.
"What do you mean?" I ask.
"The first Wishing Game was held entirely in Aperion, but each trial was in a different House," he explains. "One man made it to the end, but it was revealed he was a deity who had just come into his powers but did not know how to use them. He almost destroyed Aperion."
Thea frowns. "Is that where they say seven out of fifteen Supremes were killed in one day? But how is it that a young deity would have that type of power? To kill one Supreme is unheard of, but seven? That's impossible."
"It's a legend, Thea. I doubt he killed seven Supremes by himself," Cer adds drily. "You know those things can get blown out of proportion."
"Um, what is a Supreme?"
Thea and Cer both look at me as if they just realized I'm still around.
"Oh, right. I forget you're not used to this." She chuckles. "But now that we're heading to Aperion, you should probably know it," she says as she gets a confirmation glance from Cer. "There are fifteen royal houses in Aperion. Each House is a realm, with its own monarchs, military, and people. But from each realm, the most powerful individual is chosen to become a Supreme. Well, almost." She pauses. "There are two Houses that are the exception to the rule." She doesn't expand further. "But the most important thing is that the fifteen Supremes are the ultimate force on Aperion, and they rule over everyone ."
"That sounds interesting." I nod thoughtfully. It's almost as if all the mythology I'd read in books is one step away from becoming a reality. Despite my precarious situation in the game, I can't deny that I'm giddy about what's to come and exploring the unknown.
"It might be, but not for us," Thea adds dramatically.
"Why?" I frown.
Her lips compress in a tight line as she sighs. Cer has a similar expression.
"Aperion is our home."
"But... Didn't you say you were from a place called Arche?" I frown.
"That is the House of Arche, within Aperion," she adds sheepishly.
"Oh," I whisper.
"And since the third trial starts in a month, I think we're due a visit home, Cer."
He grunts, seemingly not too pleased with the prospect.
"Of course you're invited to join us, Luce. My parents are wonderful, and you'll also get to meet our sister," Thea exclaims.
"You have another sister?"
"She's the youngest." She smiles fondly. "It's actually the first time I'm away from her for so long, so I can't wait to see her."
"I'd love to. Thank you," I tell her sincerely.
We don't get to talk for much longer as I announce that I'm going to sleep. The fatigue is starting to get to me, and I'll need all my strength for what's to come.
I bid them good night and plan to regroup in the morning. Thea surprises me by saying that I can have the room all to myself for tonight and she'll just sleep in the same room as Cer. I don't refuse since I've been craving some alone time from the beginning.
As I go to my room, I change and take a quick shower before getting between the sheets. Yet despite being so tired, sleep doesn't come so easily. Not after everything that happened today.
Ze and Cer are out of the competition, leaving Thea and me in a team of two to fend for ourselves. If before I was contemplating going into the third trial by myself, now I'm wondering if we'll manage just the two of us. It's a little jarring to realize just how much I was depending on the others to win. And if that's the case, what does that say about me?
That you're human , a voice inside my head whispers.
I might be human, but I need to rise above my condition if I am to pass the third trial. Who knows what they'll ask of us, and for that reason, I need to amass as much information as possible and to get myself in better physical shape.
There are only two weeks left until it starts— not enough time. But I must make do.
I nod to myself as my conviction grows stronger. I might not have any fancy abilities, but I shall win based on my sheer will alone. Besides, now I have one more reason to fight until the end. I trace the marks on my chest, thinking back to what Ze said—that these are marks made by a god. The only way to find out what they mean and why I have them is to get to the final trial and meet these gods .
Curiosity brims inside of me as I wonder if, maybe, these marks I've so dreadfully abhorred my entire life might have another meaning. If they have a purpose that I may not be aware of.
A smile pulls at my lips as my mind strays into fanciful territory, imagining that the marks might make me special in some way.
I've never been special before.
But at the same time, I don't want to get my hopes up. This isn't a movie or a romance book where the heroine gets her happily ever after. This is the real world, with real challenges and dangers. If I let myself dream in vain, only I will be hurt in the end.
As I think about the way my marks lit up when Ze touched them, I can't stop my thoughts from straying to him and consequently remembering the deep disappointment I felt at his betrayal.
I trusted him, and he took advantage of that. And if what Thea's saying is true, he's been doing this from the beginning.
Just what was his goal with this competition?
Why was he so nice to me, only to turn around and be...not so nice?
I just cannot understand any of it. His behavior is contradictory, his words even more so.
"Why did you make me care for you, Ze?" I sigh to myself as I turn to the side, hugging the pillow to my chest.
My chest is heavy with hurt, my heart aching when I think of all the vile things he said to me.
I do not want to see you win.
Why? Why would he say something like that when he knows how important this game is to me? Why would he help me during this trial, saving me repeatedly if he didn't want me to win? I just cannot make sense of any of it.
"Ugh!" I cry out, banging my fist against my chest.
It's not worth it. Stop thinking about it, Luce. Just focus on Nikki.
Unfortunately, it's easier said than done. As I close my eyes and drift off to sleep, it's not Nikki that I dream about. It's Ze and those precious moments we shared on our trip.