Chapter Ninety
While Hirtus arranged for the next fighters to take our place and begin their spar, I followed Cleon, out past the crowds to an area of shade created by a stretched skin.
Neither of us spoke until he drew to a stop and checked over his shoulder to ensure we were far enough away not to be overheard.
Judging from the shouting and cheers, the next battle had begun, and that was more than enough to keep the others occupied.
Wordlessly, Cleon slipped his hand around my waist and pulled me against him.
“You are magnificent,” he said. “Truly, I have never seen a more wondrous sight than you with a sword in your hand. It is no wonder they call you their queen.”
He lowered his head to plant a kiss on my lips, and I desperately wanted to allow it, to respond with the entirety of my body. But I could not. Instead, I stepped away.
“Cleon, I have been offered another proposal of marriage.” I saw no purpose in delaying what I needed to tell him. For us to continue without him knowing the truth would be tantamount to lying, and I could not deceive him.
The look of adoration that had graced his expression shifted. His features pinched together.
“It is understandable. You are a queen. What man wouldn’t want to marry you? He is a king, I assume?”
“Cleon—”
He reached forward and took me by the hands.
“Whatever he has offered you, I will try to offer the same. We do not have lands, but if that is what you want, then I will make it so. Maybe if we were to join you, combine our armies—”
“It is not a man who offered the proposal.” I closed my eyes, wishing I could find the strength that had come so easily to me in the fight. “It is Ares.”
“Ares. Ares, the god of war?”
“The very same.”
As I opened my eyes, I saw the disbelief flash across Cleon’s face, though the expression was only fleeting. Within a heartbeat, he had regained his composure.
“Otrera,” he said firmly. “You cannot refuse a god.”
“No, I cannot, but there is something I must tell you first. A reason I must accept.”
“What other reason do you need? He is a god. No person of sound mind would ever reject such a proposal, just as no man would ever hold it against a woman who accepted.”
They were words of kindness, words of truth that worked well to hide his heartache. I did not need to say any more for Cleon to understand. Yet I needed him to know it all. This time, it was I who initiated the touch as I placed my hand against his cheek.
“When I left here before, after the time we spent together, I was with child. Our child.”
His mouth parted silently, and I let my hand remain against his skin until he spoke again. “You…we… We have a child?”
I shook my head, angry at the tears that were burning behind my eyes.
“I prayed to the gods that she would survive, Cleon, but perhaps I did not pray hard enough. I need you to know that I wanted her. I wanted our daughter with all my heart. And I miss her. I miss her, though I never even knew her.”
He was holding me, now wiping the tears from my eyes.
“Otrera, please stop. You do not need to do this to yourself. Please, you do not owe me an explanation. Not for Ares, not for our child.”
I looked up at the sky, and though the gesture stemmed the flow of tears that trickled down my cheeks, it could not restrain the throbbing that filled my heart.
“Ares has promised me I will be able to carry his children,” I said.
“He has told me he will stretch our lives so that time does not affect us the way it does normal mortals. I do not understand his ways—whether it is a gift he will give all the women or just his own daughters—but I would be a fool to dismiss such an offer.”
“Otrera, stop,” Cleon said, this time with force. “You do not need to explain any more. You are a queen. This is what queens do. They rise into places they may not want to go for their people. That is what you are doing, and my love and respect for you have only deepened because of it.”
I nodded, still feeling the trickle of tears down my cheeks. I, Otrera, queen of the Amazons, was crying.
With a sharp breath, Cleon held me at arm’s length.
“Otrera, I will hear no more. This is a reason to celebrate. You are to be married to a god. A god.” He shook his head, a smile creasing his lips. I do not know how he managed such an action, but it created a glimmer of hope within my heart.
I stepped forward so that my lips were only inches from his. Once again, his aroma filled my veins, but this time, I allowed myself to bask in it.
“I am to be married to a god indeed,” I said. “And it will occur shortly after I leave this place. But for now, while I am here, my body remains my own, and I shall do with it as I choose.”