Chapter 35
35
E zra
Why the fuck I decided to turn soppy and share some absolutely unnecessary information about having panic attacks is beyond my understanding. I’ve already learned that Maeve has a tendency to rob me of common sense. This is one more time I’m wondering if I made the right decision. A wife who makes me feel is not a good thing in our line of business. I probably should have gone with the original one who stirred exactly zero interest. That way, I wouldn’t have had any distractions.
But no, I decided to follow my dick and insist on having Maeve or no one at all. How am I supposed to treat this as a business deal if her scent alone drives me insane?
Seeing her scared to get on the boat made me feel her fear deep in my chest. It fucking ached. And then that dickhead offered her his hand like a damn knight in shining armor, and I snapped. I wanted to throw her over my shoulder and carry her inside the cabin and make sure she’s too busy with orgasms to think about her fears of anything. But when I moved closer to her, I felt that fear coming off in waves from her small, rigid silhouette. She wouldn’t deal well with roughness. So I found gentleness I didn’t know I had deep in me and was rewarded for that. Caring for her, holding her in my arms like her only lifeline made me feel larger than life.
Until I opened my mouth to spit out the truths no one needed.
I ring Noah’s phone. He’s staying on the island for another day to clean up the rest of the mess, and I’ll owe him for that big time.
“Yeah.” He sounds like he just climbed out of bed.
“Don’t tell me you just slept with someone.”
“Why? You jealous? You sure could sleep with that new wife of yours and do us all a favor and stop being a dick.”
“I’m not a dick,” I grit out.
He snorts. “ Yes, you are. And I’ll be taking bets in the office once I’m back.”
“What bets?”
“How long it will take Maeve to realize that and run away from you.”
I growl, imagining Noah’s neck under my fingers. It only makes him laugh harder.
“Already fucked up and need my advice?”
“Like it’ll ever work. I need you to make sure my place is ready for her.”
The pause that follows is concerning.
“Why?”
“Because I want Maeve to be comfortable.”
Another pause.
“Can you just make sure Martin follows through on all my instructions?”
These fucking pauses begin driving me insane .
“Noah?”
“Yeah. I’m here.”
“Will you check on Martin?”
“Ezra, Martin always follows through. Better than I ever would. Why do you suddenly question him?”
“I just need another set of eyes, that’s all.”
“Ezra,” Noah laughs. “Are you in l ? —”
“Just get it fuckin’ done,” I growl into the phone and disconnect the call. I don’t need his stupid assumptions right now. Not when I’m confused as well.
I spend the rest of the ride as far away from Maeve as possible but always keep an eye on her in case she has another attack and needs my help.
But she doesn’t.
She also gets off the boat without needing my assistance, and I feel slightly disappointed. I was hoping to be needed by her. In my sick mind, I like her relying on me.
The staff brings the suitcases to the waiting limo, and we get inside the same way as before: silently. I don’t know what to say because every single thing that comes out of my mouth turns me into some whiny shit neither of us need. I can’t stand that person when I’m around her. That person will not do what I must do. That person would not have the guts.
We get our tickets and walk through security to the gates. The boarding is soon, so we just take a seat and wait. In silence.
When our boarding is announced, Maeve takes off like a rabid dog is after her juicy ass, and I follow shortly after, keeping my eyes on said ass because it’s now mine, and I can ogle it any chance I get.
She’s in the plane way before me, and when I step inside and walk toward our seats, I’m stopped by a flight attendant with a wide smile and red lipstick .
“Hello, sir. May I help you?” Her voice is full of honey. I don’t like honey.
“No,” I cut off her further questions. This is me on any day; I don’t have time for pleasantries. I have money, and I pay people a good amount of it to do what I need them to without the need to be polite. I don’t even need them to be polite with me, just do your fucking job. Silently, preferably.
Her smile drops for a second before it’s planted back on. Her eyes dip down with a quick glance over me and return to my face.
“Let me know if you need anything.” Her annoying smile goes wider. “Anything.”
It wasn’t very subtle, so I ignore her, hoping she’ll get the hint. I’ve never been interested in quick hookups, and I’m not about to start now. Especially, when I’m fresh out of vows. Even if they were forced, I made them.
When I walk to my seat, Maeve meets me with an angry glare. Her narrowed eyes shift between me and the attendant who just stopped me in the aisle. Is my new wife jealous?
I stick my carry-on in the overhead bin and plant my ass in the chair which seems too small for me. She puffs and huffs while trying to situate herself like she hasn’t already done that. I watch her. She checks the contents of the toiletry bag provided for us by the airline. I watch her. She gives me a side-eye and continues checking everything around her. I watch her. She scratches her cheek. I still watch. She wipes the bead of sweat running down her temple. And I watch it. She becomes agitated and whips toward me with tiny slits for eyes, and I barely can contain my smile.
“What?” She sounds beyond annoyed.
“What?” I parrot, biting the inside of my cheek.
“Done flirting with that lady? Or is she coming back?”
I let a smile graze my lips—I do it more often around her than I have in the past few years combined. “Are you jealous?”
“I’m not,” she snorts, like the idea itself offends her. “But I don’t want to be made a fool.”
“You think I’d cheat on you?”
Another snort. So loud this time, it attracts the attention of people around us, so she quickly lowers her voice. “You slept with me while being engaged to my sister. Forgive the fuck out of me for being concerned.”
My shoulders go rigid. I turn my body toward her and lean my elbow on the divider between us so she can hear me better. “I wasn’t engaged to her. I hadn’t even seen her.” I lean a hair closer. “But this time, I’ve given my vows. And I intend to keep them.” I find and hold her eyes, making sure she knows I mean business.
Her throat bobs. “Even if she offers to make you a member of the mile-high club?”
I quirk a brow. “Who said I’m not already a member?”
Her lips pinch together, and she turns away from me.
My chuckle is breathless as I grab her shoulder and pull her to me. “I am not,” I whisper into her ear, making her shiver. “But I don’t mind becoming one with you.” I quickly nip on her earlobe, making her exhale harshly.
She slowly turns her head toward me, nearly grazing my lips with hers. “Who said I’m not a member?”
I inhale loudly through my nose, grab the back of her head and move her face to mine. “Are you?” I hiss.
“Why? Are you jealous?” Her breath fans my lips.
I can say a million things and play it off, but this is where I create a fucking boundary. Putting some pressure into my grip on her neck, I speak. “I am. Because the only initiation my wife will ever have is from me.” I give her lips a lick. “And you’ll be smart to remember that. Wife.”
I pull away, shifting my legs because my dick is rock hard. Feeling a stare on the side of my face, I turn toward it and find an old lady looking at me with wide eyes.
“Newlyweds,” I explain with a simple smile. She giggles and turns away to murmur something to her companion who’s about the same age as she is. He sends me an appreciative wink and places his hand on her knee.
They look to be in love judging by the way their body language totally aligns with each other. I look at Maeve whose whole body is turned away from me. Her knees are squeezed shut together, and her hands are fidgeting on the armrests. We speak totally different languages.
We get drinks before everyone is situated, and the extra-friendly attendant offers me her ‘help’ once again. I look up at her, and she points at one of the lavatories.
“This one is bigger,” she whispers with a wink.
“I’ll make sure to use this one with my wife,” I deadpan and notice how fast her smile drops. For fuck’s sake, what’s wrong with people nowadays? I came here with a woman who has a fat, shiny ring on her finger. It should be obvious to everyone that the fucking rock is me pissing on my territory. Obviously, we are together. What the fuck did she think was going to happen?
I glance at Maeve and the ring she keeps touching with her other hand. I make myself a note to get her another ring because this one was bought to impress the family, not the bride. And even if it was brand new and meant for her, I’d have to throw it away and choose another one. It’s not her. This giant diamond is not her. This platinum band is not her. The whole thing seems tasteless on her artistic hand. It seems too heavy and out of place.
“Is this how it’s going to be all the time?” She speaks so quietly, I’m not even sure it was for me.
“What? ”
“Women around you.”
“No,” I say honestly. “I don’t usually attract women. I’m not sure what happened with this one.”
“I doubt that,” she chuckles darkly.
“What do you mean?”
She finally shifts her attention from her ring to me. “I mean you being you.”
“The asshole?”
A sudden giggle escaping her lips surprises us both. “No. You being a ridiculously attractive and rich dude. It’s a pretty catchy combination.”
“You think I’m attractive?” I ask with a sly smile, and she rolls her eyes.
“This is what you got from my words. Typical.”
“No, Maeve,” I start seriously. “I don’t get attention from women because I’m an asshole, and I have the aura of one. They come and leave after my first bark.”
She lifts her eyes and finds the attendant who’s showing the safety rules.
I wince. “This one was persistent.” I don’t mind attention; I don’t care about that. But if it bothers her, it has to change. “I’ll make sure you don’t have a reason to feel insecure.”
“Even if the marriage is not real?”
“Isn’t it?” I ask, genuinely curious to hear her answer because more times than not it feels real to me. The island was real. My support for her at the wedding was real. My anger toward her father too. My constant need to touch her is as real as it gets.
She looks at me with her big, blue eyes. They’re open and vulnerable. This is the moment when she doesn’t need jokes. She needs the truth. “Why me, Ezra?”
I know what she’s asking. I’ve been asking this myself too and haven’t come up with the answer yet.
“I don’t know,” I reply sincerely. “I just know that you make me… feel. ”
“Feel?” Her brows draw together.
I nod. “I haven’t felt much in a long time.”
“This is why I’m here? Because I make you feel ?”
Another nod from me.
“What do I make you feel?”
I watch her open face, knowing she wants to hear something about love and shit like that, but I can’t give it to her. I’m not going to lie to her anymore.
“I don’t know.”
“Okay.” She visibly deflates and buckles her seatbelt. I do the same. And while I do, I feel a heavy stare on my face. When I find the same extremely stubborn flight attendant, I curse myself for not just saying fuck it and buying another jet so I don’t have to share it with the board. No more flying commercial with my wife. Never.