Chapter 33
LIZA
Something was wrong. I knew it the moment I walked into the boathouse and saw the rigid set of Darek’s shoulders.
When I woke up to find him out of bed, I was a little surprised.
I expected to find him in the kitchen with a cup of coffee waiting for me like he had so many other mornings.
But he wasn’t there. I searched the house and decided to check the boathouse.
And now I understood why he disappeared from bed. He was upset about something which I didn’t understand. Did the lawyers call him? No. I would have heard the phone and there was no way they would call him before six in the morning.
Something happened.
This wasn’t the man who made love to me last night. He was distant. Shut down. Cold.
“Darek,” I tried again. “Please talk to me. What’s wrong?”
He finally stopped sanding but didn’t turn around. “I can’t do this again.”
“Can’t do what?”
“Have my heart broken. Get attached. Let myself believe in something that was never meant to last.” He set down the sandpaper and faced me. The coldness in his eyes made my stomach drop. “The contract will be over in a few days. I need to remember that. We both do.”
“But I don’t want it to end. I told you that. We’ve built something. And Daisie. I love that little girl.”
“You told me a lot of things.” His voice was flat, emotionless. “But actions speak louder than words, don’t they?”
“What are you talking about? Darek, we had such a good day yesterday. You were happy. I was happy. We all were. What changed between last night and this morning?”
“I woke up. That’s what changed. I remembered what this actually is.”
I felt tears starting to burn behind my eyes. “What this is?”
My heart felt like it was being ripped out of my chest, scraping across rib bones and doing real damage.
“Don’t.” The word came out sharp.
“Don’t what?” I asked. My throat hurt from the attempt to hold back tears. I was certain I was in the throes of a nightmare. Any second I would wake up and he would be kissing the side of my face and telling me it was all a bad dream.
“Don’t say that when you’re already planning your next job. You’re already thinking about your next client and the fat paycheck you’ll earn. Will you fake it for him as well as you did with me? Did you have some kind of acting classes in your college career?”
“What the hell are you talking about? Acting?” I stared at him, trying to process what he was saying. My brain felt sluggish, like I was trying to run through quicksand. “Darek, I have no idea what you’re talking about. What next job? What client?”
“Don’t play dumb with me, Liza. I saw the messages from Della.”
My stomach lurched. “What messages?”
He rolled his eyes. “Don’t play dumb, Liza. It does not work for you. Anyone that looks at you can see you’re intelligent.”
For some reason, I didn’t think that was a compliment. “I’m not playing anything. What messages? I haven’t spoken to Della since she sent me the contract to sign.”
He shrugged. “Then you better check in with your boss because she’s pretty eager to get in touch with you.”
He made it sound dirty. Wrong. Like Della was my pimp. Or madame.
“If you want to be mad at me and have a fight, then we need to be on the same page so I can defend myself. I haven’t talked to Della. I thought things were good between us. And now you’re acting like a total stranger.”
“I saw the messages,” he said again.
That was when it dawned on me. Text messages.
“Wait, what? You went through my phone?”
“It was buzzing. I thought it might be important.” He crossed his arms, defensive now. “Turns out it was. Very enlightening, actually.”
“Well, you’ll have to enlighten me,” I replied. “Because I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“You’re already lining up your next fake relationship. Already planning to move on to the next guy who’ll pay you to pretend to care about him.”
The accusation hit me like a physical blow. It felt like a donkey kick to my chest. “That’s not fair.” My voice sounded like I had been screaming for hours.
“Isn’t it? You’re still registered with the agency, Liza. You’re still available for hire. So tell me, what exactly was I supposed to think when I see you’ve already got your next gig lined up?”
“I didn’t know she was going to message me! I’m not interested in another job.”
“But you haven’t told her that, have you? Haven’t officially ended your relationship with Faux. You’re keeping your options open, just in case this doesn’t work out. Just in case you need a backup plan.”
I wanted to argue, but he wasn’t entirely wrong. I hadn’t officially told Della I was done with the agency. The thought hadn’t even crossed my mind because I’d been so caught up in what was happening here. But I could see how it looked from his perspective.
“I should have told her,” I admitted quietly. “You’re right. But I’ve been so focused on us, on you and Daisie, that I didn’t even think about it.”
“That’s the problem, isn’t it? You didn’t think about it. Because at the end of the day, this is still just a job to you. I’m still just a client.”
“No. God, no, Darek. That’s not true at all.”
“Then why haven’t you told Della you’re not available? Why haven’t you made it clear that you’re not interested in other opportunities? If this was real for you, that would have been the first thing you did.”
“No, my first thought was you and your custody situation,” I said. I was barely keeping the tears back. I didn’t know it was possible to feel your heart break in real time.
But it was happening.
He turned back to his boat, effectively dismissing me. “This ends when the contract ends. The sooner we both make peace with that, the better.”
“You don’t mean that.”
“I do. This was always temporary, Liza. We both knew that going in. I just forgot for a while. Let myself get confused about what this was.”
“It’s not confusion. What we have is real.”
“What we have is a business arrangement that I’m choosing to end early. Consider the contract fulfilled. I’ll have the payment processed today.” He still wasn’t looking at me. “You should start making arrangements to leave.”
I staggered backward like he actually kicked me. “You’re kicking me out?”
“I’m releasing you from your obligations. You’re free to take that San Francisco job, or whatever other opportunities Della has lined up. You don’t need to stay here anymore.”
I stood there, staring at his back, waiting for him to turn around. Praying he would take back his horrible words. I needed him to look at me and tell me he was sorry for being an idiot.
But he didn’t. He pretended I wasn’t even there.
“Fine,” I heard myself say. “If that’s what you want. If you’d rather believe I’m here for the money and don’t want to actually listen to what I’m trying to tell you, fine. Let’s just end it now.”
I stood for a few seconds, silently begging him to turn around. Please turn around.
When he didn’t, I knew it was over. I could practically see my hopes and dreams evaporating in front of my very eyes.
I turned and ran back to the house, half expecting him to follow me. I hoped he would come after me and apologize. I needed him to tell me he didn’t mean it.
But he didn’t. The boathouse door didn’t open. No footsteps followed me across the lawn.
He really did it. He ended it without a backward glance.
I burst into the house and took the stairs two at a time, heading straight for my room. Not my room. The guest room. It was never really my room. I was never really part of the family. I was just passing through. I was the hired help. Nothing more, nothing less.
I started throwing things into my suitcase, not bothering to fold anything, just needing to get out before I completely fell apart.
Clothes, toiletries, my laptop, my research notes.
Everything that marked this room as mine, packed away like I’d never been here at all.
I left the expensive dresses hanging in the closet.
I would never need them again. And I didn’t want to take anything from him.
I had to go back to his room to get my phone. I grabbed it, ignoring the messages from Della. I pulled up the Uber app with shaking hands. The nearest available driver was twelve minutes away. Fine. I could hold it together for twelve minutes.
I dragged my suitcase down the stairs, the wheels thumping against each step, and that was when I saw her. Daisie was standing in the hallway in her pajamas, the stuffed whale clutched in her arms, staring at me with wide, confused eyes.
“Liza? Where are you going?”
Oh god. I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t break this little girl’s heart. But I also couldn’t stay.
“I have to go for a while, sweetheart.” I tried to keep my voice steady, tried not to let her see the tears that were threatening to spill over.
“But why? Are you mad at Daddy?”
“No, I’m not. It’s complicated. Ask your dad to explain, okay? He’s in the boathouse. He’ll be in soon to make your breakfast.”
“Are you leaving?”
I forced a smile. “I am. I’m sorry. I have to go. I’ll miss you, Daisie. You are an amazing little girl. Thank you for being so nice to me. Goodbye.”
I couldn’t look at her face and see the hurt and confusion there. I headed for the door.
“Liza!” Daisie called after me. “Please don’t go!”
That stopped me. I turned back to see her crying now, tears streaming down her face. I wanted to run back and hug her. I would love to tell her I was not ever going to leave her.
But Darek had made his choice. And I couldn’t stay where I wasn’t wanted. It was his house. He wanted me out.
And that was that.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I’m so sorry, Daisie.”
Then I turned and walked out the door.
I walked down the drive and exited through the gate. I stood there and hoped the driver hurried. I needed to get away.
The Uber pulled up five minutes later. I supposed there was part of me that hoped Darek would come look for me.
He didn’t.
I threw my suitcase in the trunk and climbed into the back seat. The driver, a woman in her fifties, glanced at me in the rearview mirror.
“You okay, honey?”
“I’m fine. Can we just go? Please?”
She pulled away from the estate. I watched through the rear window as the house got smaller.
It felt like I was closing a chapter of my life that I wasn’t done reading.