Chapter Fifteen #2
“Oh, no, no. Thank you, though, ma’am,” Mars said. “That’s very nice of ya but I ‘ave to get back to the ‘ospital.”
“Oh?” Mamá looked at me. “How is Rex?”
I felt my stomach turn but I didn’t answer. All I could do was shake my head to stop myself from crying all over again. I definitely didn’t want Mars to see any more of that but ever since Rex had been hurt, it felt like that’s all I did.
“’E’s awake, ma’am,” Mars said.
She smiled, putting both hands together. “Please…I give you food for him?”
“Great. I’m sure ‘e’d love that.”
“Good.” She turned and spoke to Carlotta in Spanish, asking her to box up some enchiladas for Rex. Carlotta smiled, and we watched her go before Mamá turned back to Mars. “Please, you sit down for a minute?” She swept an arm out for him to come into the house.
“Oh, I shouldn’t. My boss will be waiting for me.”
“No, you sit down. What is your name?”
“Marshall. Marshall Clifford, ma’am.”
She hooked an arm in his. “Come. Sit down, Marshall. I like to hear about Rex. You tell us.”
“Mamá, no es necesario,” I said, helpless to stop a small Boricuan mamá when she had one thing on her mind.
“Shh, Cachi. Marshall is guest.”
Mars exchanged a helpless glance with me and the other agent who smirked, but he did as he was asked and let her guide him to the couch.
I followed and took a seat across from her and Mars as she peppered him with questions about Rex.
When she heard that he had no feeling in his legs, she started to cry.
“But the doc said ‘e just woke up. The feeling may come back and the paralysis might not be permanent,” Mars explained.
She looked at me, and I translated all the details that Captain Sorensen had relayed to us after he was told about Rex’s condition.
“We pray for Rex,” she concluded with a determined nod.
I reached into my pocket, remembering the crucifix and handed it to her. She smiled at me when Carlotta came back with a big container of enchiladas as Mars stood.
“Much appreciated, ma’am,” he said, smiling as he took the container from her. “Rex is going to really enjoy this.”
Tia Carlotta blushed. “No problem. Please tell Rex we will pray for him.”
“I’ll do that.” Mars turned to me, and I rushed at him, throwing my arms around him, hugging him hard. He smelled good and very solid, just like Rex. “I’ll take ya advice, Cachi. We’ll build that ramp just in case Rex needs it,” he said as he let go of me.
I stepped back and nodded to him.
“Tell Rex—” I didn’t know what to say.
Mars gave me a sad smile. He nodded. “I will tell ‘im. You take care of yourself, okay?” He waved at everyone and walked to the door while I followed. He opened the front door and turned to me.
“Thank you, Mars.”
“Cheers, Cachi. You look after ya self, yeah.”
I watched him walk down the steps and out to his car. When he turned around, I waved and then shut the front door, knowing it might be the last time I ever saw him.
REX
I looked at the unappealing heart healthy meal one of the nurses had gleefully put onto the rolling table for me about a half hour ago.
The sad lump of reconstituted potato flakes was perfectly round, probably from the ice cream scoop the hospital used to prepare hundreds of trays.
And I suppose the tiny piece of ground meat shaped in a square was their idea of meatloaf.
I quickly decided I’d send them my own recipe.
At least it wouldn’t be gray and held together with shredded cardboard like this one.
I picked up my fork and poked at the green Jell-O in a separate dish. It was topped with whipping cream but that too was artificial, not the real thing made from heavy whipping cream, vanilla, and sugar. The green dessert jiggled in the most nauseating way.
When the door opened and Mars stepped inside holding something in a long, flat Tupperware box, my heart did a happy dance in anticipation of good food. He smiled broadly as he walked over to the bed.
“’Ullo, Rex.”
It was so nice to hear the Liverpool accent coming from one of my best friends.
It made me feel better just knowing my brothers were nearby.
I’d seen him only once for a couple of minutes after all the guys had come in to wish me a quick healing after Cachi left…
or should I say, after I’d sent him away.
“Hey, buddy. What’d’ya got there?”
“’Omemade chicken enchiladas.”
I glanced up at him, remembering the last time he’d made Mexican which he’d cooked in his own kitchen. It’d been something none of us could identify as…well…as food. I raised an eyebrow. “You made this?” I hesitated to reach out and take the box, so he set it on the table and grinned at me.
“Nope. This was made by the loving ‘ands of Cachi’s mum and his auntie Carlotta.”
I blinked several times. “What?”
“Aye. I drove ‘im out to Camarillo where the FBI ‘as put the family up in one of our safe’ouses. They were very insistent that I bring you some food, knowing the ‘ospital grub’s a bit on the dodgy side.” He gave my current hospital tray a dubious glance before looking back at me.
“You drove him.”
He nodded. “Aye. I’m the usual driver in case ya can’t remember with all the brain damage you suffered from loss of oxygen after ya were shot.”
I frowned at him. “What’re you talkin’ about? I didn’t suffer any brain damage.”
He crossed his arms and I took brief note of the bulging muscles in his forearms and shoulders beneath the muscle shirt he wore. “Really? Because ya could’ve fooled me.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Oh, I don’t know, maybe because ya sent Cachi away even though ya well aware of the way he feels about ya.”
“The way he feels about me?”
“’E didn’t tell you ‘e’s in love with you then? Because ‘e told me ‘e did.”
My eyes widened. “He told you that?”
He smirked at me. “Aye, and even after that, ya sent ‘im away.”
I stared at him for a few seconds before dragging my gaze up to the ceiling tiles whose holes and creases were becoming very familiar to me. “Well, he shouldn’t have said it.”
“Why?”
I glanced back at Mars. “Because he ain’t in love with me, that’s why!”
“Oh reeeally? Ya can’t see it? Because even if he ‘adn’t said it, Cachi wears his ‘eart on his sleeve. It’s written all over ‘is face when anyone talks about ya, Rex.”
I swallowed hard, searching my good friend’s eyes for the truth. I wanted to hang onto every word he said, even though hearing them hurt. “Well, I wish he wouldn’t have said anythin’ to you or anyone else. Y’all musta got an earful while you were waitin’ for me to wake up.”
The disbelief on his face was surprising.
“Blimey. You’re a bit of a tosser, you are.
Cachi barely said a word to anyone but Joshua and Marcello for two days.
‘E refused all food, and even when a kind nurse brought him scrubs and showed ‘im a room where ‘e could get cleaned up, ‘e refused to shower and change in case someone came out of ya room to tell us you were awake.
‘E waited for you to come back to life just like the rest of us.
Most of the time, he ‘ad a rosary in his ‘ands, and ‘e was praying for ya.
Mickey offered to take ‘im to the chapel, but ‘e wouldn’t leave the waiting room. He was sat in a corner and prayed for two fucking days, Rex. So, no, he didn’t tell anyone ‘ow he felt about your stupid arse.”
I sat there letting all his words sink in and hating every one of them with a passion. I didn’t want to think about how torn up Cachi had been over my injuries, but it was clear, I hadn’t known the extent of it, even after Candy’s conversation with me.
“I don’t know what to do about it,” I finally admitted.
“I do have feelin’s for him, but when I think about bein’ in a chair, possibly for the rest of my life, I know I have to ignore them feelin’s.
He’s a twenty-five-year-old kid who fell in love with an older man.
Even before we started up, I knew he was too young for me and now that my work has put him in the cartel’s crosshairs, I wish I would’ve never pursued him. ”
“First of all, it’s not ya work that put ‘im in their crosshairs. It was Wallace, Steele, and that Marcello idiot who made the decision to bring ‘im in just because a cartel goon shopped at his uncle’s shop. They could’ve gone to Cachi, brought ‘im in for questioning about his involvement or lack of involvement with the cartel.
Instead, they used ‘im in their little valet operation just to see if one of the cartel big wigs treated ‘im any differently than they did the rest of the drivers.
“So, no, you can’t say that ‘e’s in danger because of something you did to put ‘im there. The way I see it—the way any of us see it—it’s all Wallace and Steele’s fault for jumping to conclusions about Cachi, not you.
So, stop feeling guilty, Rex. That man loves you and I’d guess ‘e’d probably love ya regardless of whether you were an FBI agent or not. ”
I nodded slowly, feeling like a total heel. “You’re right, Mars, but I still don’t want him to feel responsible for nursin’ me back to health. I can’t let him do that, don’tcha understand?”
“Even if ‘e wants to?”
I felt tears then. I shook my head, unable to stop them from tracking down my face. “No, even if he wants to.”
He shrugged, looking downright unhappy. He nodded at the Tupperware container.
“Well, enjoy your tea. I’ll see you later.
On the way in, Candy said ‘e’s sending us ‘ome to get some sleep and then, we’ve got work to do, starting tomorrow.
We’ve got a cartel to ‘unt down now that they’ve made it personal. ”
“Because of me, right?”
“Aye, because of you, brother. They ‘ave no idea that they’ve unleashed a dragon. We’re going to get these bastards for what they did to one of our own, Rex.” He sighed. “Anyway, one of us will always be around, though.”
“Here at the hospital?”
He smiled. “Aye. Candy printed out a ‘ole schedule. Mickey’s got first watch.” He glanced at the chair in the corner and nodded at it.
“That thing folds out to a bed but apparently, now ya out of immediate danger, they’ll be moving ya to a private room.
Oh, and SAC Bradley ‘as somehow found enough money in the budget to post a couple of agents outside your door ‘round the clock, just in case the cartel shows their ugly mugs.”
I admit, that was a surprise. I hadn’t even thought about there being a possible danger to me here in the hospital. “That’s awful nice of the SAC. Tell the guys I’m glad they’re goin’ back to work and to be careful, will you, Mars?”
He smiled and nodded. “Of course, brother.” He walked up to the bed and bent close, gathering me up in a gentle hug. Before pulling away, he planted a big, sloppy kiss on my bearded cheek which made me laugh as I shoved him away.
“Get the fuck outta here, Brit,” I said with a chuckle.
He straightened and saluted before pivoting on one heel and walking out the door. He winked from the other side of the glass, turning and walking away on two good legs.