Chapter 23
TWENTY THREE
Felix
I take my first full breath of air when we’re finally in our suite, and the relief douses and calms my nerves.
I was on edge the entire flight, and it had zero to do with it being my first time on a plane.
I was distracted and upset, but I guess it was nothing compared to the panic attack one of their friends—I think his name is Ryker—had on the flight.
If it were possible for Atlas to hate me more, he would totally try, because apparently he and Grey always used to sit together.
But he was stuck with Ryker and was not happy.
He let me know each time I got up to use the bathroom; I could feel his glare on me.
At one point I got up and found Ryker inside Atlas’s shirt, hiding his head as if that would help if the plane actually went down.
I’m going to put that behind me. I’m going to enjoy the time I have here with Grey, because this place is insanely beautiful and I’m with the most caring man I’ve ever met in my life. I will deal with what I have to when I get home.
The suite is huge, with a living room and tiny kitchen area. I follow Grey into the bedroom and look out the sliding glass doors to the balcony, with the bright blue ocean and beach just beyond outside our window. There’s only one king-sized bed in here.
I know that Atlas has a joined room next to us—Oli and Andre had gotten them joint rooms—but I’m not sure who he’s rooming with, if anyone. I really want to talk to him, but I don’t know how. I’m scared. He seems scary. He’s important to Grey, so I want to solve whatever this is between us.
I set my bag against the wall and go to the sliding door, opening it and letting the warm breeze settle through the room.
Salt water and fresh air breeze past me.
Stepping onto the balcony, I smile when I see the beach below.
It’s an unusual shade of blue I’ve only seen in pictures.
Palm trees and flowers surround the hotel around us.
When I left Steven all those months ago, never in my wildest dreams could I have imagined I’d be here. My fingers curl over the railing as I look out, and my stomach swoops when I glance down.
Strong arms wrap around my waist. I don’t flinch, don’t want to crawl away.
Instead, I lean into him. I look over my shoulder and can’t resist leaning in, pressing a soft kiss to his mouth.
“Are you tired?” he whispers near my ear.
It’s such an odd feeling. I’ve been at war with the person who’s supposed to love me for nearly a decade, but Grey .
. . I don’t know. Grey makes surrender seem so sweet.
I want to stay here in his arms forever.
The soft hairs of his beard tickle my neck as he nuzzles in the hollow before I feel his lips press slow kisses along my skin.
“A little.” I turn in his arms and cup his face.
My fingers smooth through the soft hairs of his beard.
I feel it now, the little tug on my heart I’m afraid to feel fully.
I did this once before. I fell in love and that love hurt me.
Steven wasn’t bad in the beginning, and I’m afraid I won’t recognize when I’m in danger again.
Like right now.
The thing is, at no point in my relationship with Steven did I ever feel like this.
Looking into Grey’s eyes now there is so much light and love in them, and I just hope that light and love extends to me.
I can’t see him being a monster. I can’t see him hurting me or anyone else for that matter.
Not with his past. Not with how he treats me or his family, who love him dearly.
I admit Steven was never this kind to me. Grey may think he’s a quiet, simple man, but his love for the people around him is loud.
What Steven did was manipulate me into thinking he was taking care of me, but taking care of someone and then making them feel horrible about it is not love.
If you love someone, you don’t hold it over their head as leverage.
Steven found a sixteen-year-old kid who craved attention and wielded it to his advantage.
“What are you thinking?” he whispers.
My palms run down his chest, and if I could stay here in his arms forever, I would. I would stay just like this and soak in his warmth, because that’s what Grey is to me. Warmth. Warmth and light and maybe love. “About how lucky I am.”
He blinks, surprised by my admission, and my chest swells with so much feeling it becomes uncomfortable.
“Oh yeah?”
My hands land on either side of his neck, my thumb smoothing along his jaw. So lucky. Damn he’s handsome. Handsome, kind, and smells so damn good.
“I’d really like to show you how lucky I am.” The deep rasp of his voice goes right to my dick. He leans in, his nose ghosting over my cheek before he presses a kiss to my mouth. Greedy, I move a little, taking what I want. A tiny moan slips from his lips.
“Hey.” We both flinch, looking behind us, finding Oli and Andre in the doorway. “Sorry, we were in Atlas’s room. Our bad.” Oli grins, pumping his eyebrows, not looking sorry one bit. When Oli booked the hotel, he put Grey and Atlas in adjoining rooms, and it looks like we share a balcony.
Yay.
I realize Grey’s arms are still wrapped around me as Atlas steps onto the balcony rolling his eyes. “Just so everyone here is on the same page, I hate you all!”
“What?! Ryker had to sit with someone.”
“Disrespectfully, Oli. Go fuck yourself,” Atlas grumbles. “Try having a nearly six-foot-five hockey player trying to crawl inside your crevices for nearly seven hours.”
“We’ve tried. Lots of chaffing.” Oli slaps Andre’s stomach playfully.
Oli loops his arm around Atlas’s neck, ruffling his hair, but Atlas slaps his hands away, shoving out of his hold. “Not so funny when it’s you, huh?” Atlas punches his arm. “Ow! Dick.”
“Where is Ryker anyway?” Andre asks.
“Went to his room. He was feeling sick from the flight.” Atlas shrugs. “What’s going on?” He asks Oli, but his eyes slide to us again. Hurt flashes briefly, and I think I’m the only one who notices.
“We’re going to go down to dinner. I wanted to see if you and Grey want to join me. I want us to have dinner, just us three.” I see Grey’s gaze slide to me. What he doesn’t notice is Atlas’s eye roll.
“Felix, you can come with me.” Andre smiles. “Vee and I are going dancing.”
“Oh, I don’t dance,” I protest.
“Believe me, you can’t be worse than Oli.
” Oli slaps his ass. “Come on, it’ll be fun.
Vanessa will love you to death.” Andre loops his arm through mine, pulling me away from Grey.
“We’re going to have a great time. I promise to bring him back in one piece.
” Andre drags me away, only stopping to give Oli a kiss.
“Don’t get too drunk. I have plans for you later. ”
“Ugh, I can’t take this.” Atlas storms back into his room, sliding his door shut, and Oli chuckles, giving Andre another kiss.
Andre grins near his lips. “Have fun with the brat.”
I think . . . I think I love dancing.
“Who did you come with?” Vanessa yells over the music, grinding against me.
There’s so much life in her eyes. She’s on her third margarita and her deep brown skin shimmers with sweat under the lights on the dance floor.
There are only three walls, leaving one completely open with a view of the beach.
It’s a little packed and very hot here, but I’m having fun. A lot of fun.
I tried sitting at a table when we first arrived, but Vanessa wasn’t having any of it when I told her I don’t know how to dance.
Andre’s in front of her now, and she’s smushed between us like a really pretty sandwich.
Her vanilla perfume is light and smells good, and her black curls are loose voluminous ringlets that feel soft whenever they brush against my face.
“He’s Grey’s boyfriend,” Andre yells over the music.
“Which one’s Grey?” she yells.
“The brooding one with the blond hair and beard.”
Her hips sway as she turns to face me. “He’s hot. Good for you!” She throws her arms around my neck. “Are you alright? Is this okay?”
It takes me a moment to realize she means her touching me, and I nod.
I’m actually having a lot of fun, even if I’m swaying a bit awkwardly, unlike the two of them.
Andre made Oli swear not to drink too much, but I think we’ve already finished a pitcher of margaritas between the three of us.
I like those beers that Grey buys, but margaritas are a million times better.
“You’re adorable.” She leans her head back to Andre. “He’s like a sweet puppy.” She sways her body against me, and Andre turns, kissing her on the cheek.
Andre wipes the sweat away from his temple. “I’m taking a break. I need air. Break?”
She nods and doesn’t wait to grab me by the hand, leading me off the dance floor through the other dancing bodies.
Fresh air hits us as we walk onto the beach where there’s a free round table with an umbrella.
The setting sun breaks into pinks and oranges as it fades for the day.
“I haven’t danced that hard in forever.” She wipes the sweat beading along her temple.
Andre joins us at the table with another pitcher, but this one is clear. “We need water.” Andre sets the three glasses down and pours us all a drink. I take it gratefully.
“Has everyone arrived?” Vanessa asks.
Andre shakes his head, taking a sip. The loose cream-linen shirt he’s wearing plunges into a deep V, displaying his muscles.
Unlike Oli, Andre doesn’t seem to have any tattoos.
Vanessa is wearing a tight red dress that sits on her curves as if it was tailored just for her.
I feel a little out of place in my T-shirt and jeans.
“Knox is coming tomorrow, but I think Colton is here. We just need to keep those two away from each other. We made them both promise not to fight. Landon and Alyssa are arriving sometime later tonight—”