Chapter 7
Riot
I glanced sideways at Wynter as I drove to the studio. The silence between us was palpable, and it was taking everything in me not to break it.
Wynter was staring out the window, headphones on and arms crossed over her chest. She hadn’t spoken to me, Koa, or Knox in the three days since I’d told her about her dad showing up. The only reason she was even driving with me was because she couldn’t resist the lure of studio time.
This was a last-ditch effort to thaw the ice that had built around us .
. . and maybe get her to talk. If spending time working on her art didn’t help, then I hoped talking to Cara would.
She had a way about her that could get anyone to open up.
As the only positive female figure in Wynter’s life, she often fell into the surrogate mom role with her, and I couldn’t be more grateful.
I’d nearly cried in relief when she’d offered to take Wynter to buy products after she’d first gotten her period.
The poor kid had been mortified to go with her big brother, and honestly, I couldn’t blame her.
Anyway, I hoped Cara would be able to get something out of her, because I was crawling out of my skin over the silent treatment. I’d rather she yell.
We pulled into the parking lot, and Wynter was out of the SUV before I could even fully stop. “Fuck.” This was not going well. By the time I grabbed my bag and got inside, Wynter was nowhere to be seen.
Cara was leaning against the doorframe that separated the main shop from the studio and classroom spaces. Her face was full of concern.
“She went back already?” I asked.
Cara nodded. “Barely got a hello out of her, too. She’s still not speaking to you?”
Suddenly exhausted, I leaned against the counter, my legs feeling too heavy to support my body weight.
“Not a word. She won’t speak to Koa or Knox either.
We tried explaining to her why her father couldn’t just show up like that, but she didn’t care.
She wants real parents, Cara. Can’t say I blame her. ”
Cara scowled at me. “She has real parents, Riot. It doesn’t matter who birthed her or donated their sperm. You and Koa are her parents.”
I scrubbed my face. “Yeah, well . . . I guess we’re a pretty shitty substitute.”
“Riot St. James. Don’t you dare say that about yourself. You and Koa are better parents than half the people I know. Wynter has big feelings right now, and they’re valid, but don’t you dare put yourself down because of it. She’ll come around.”
I wasn’t so sure. “My lawyer said Aren petitioned to have the restraining order removed and to appeal the custody agreement. She’s pretty sure it won’t go anywhere, but I don’t know. He’s claiming he’s clean and reformed. They might give him a chance.”
The thought of it made me sick. He’d tried to kill her.
I didn’t give a fuck if he’d been high then or not.
He’d tried to smother a four-year-old. He’d almost killed me.
Knox had had nightmares every night since Aren had reappeared.
Cruz had had a full-blown panic attack, confusing Aren with his father, that had ended with us needing to go to an emergency family therapy session just from being present when that fucker had shown up.
There was no fucking way I was letting him anywhere near Wynter.
“And we’ll deal with that if it comes to it. One thing at a time, honey.”
“Yeah.” I looked over at her. “I’m tired, Cara. I’m so fucking tired.”
She crossed the distance between us and wrapped her arms around me.
“Why don’t you go home? Leave Wynter here and let her vent some of her frustrations in her artwork.
Then we’ll order Chinese, and I’ll try to talk to her.
Maybe you and Koa could even go out, go to a movie or dinner or something.
When was the last time the two of you did something without the kids? ”
It was on the tip of my tongue to remind her that we weren’t really together like that, but I stopped myself. Now that she’d mentioned it, I wanted it more than anything. I wanted to go out with just Koa. Some adult time with the person who meant everything to me.
“Never,” I said with a laugh. “But it won’t be today either. Knox is still way too shaken up for me to leave him alone with the kids. Besides, until we know what’s going on with Aren, I don’t feel comfortable with that.”
“Bring them back here.”
“What?”
“Bring them all back here. Even Knox if he wants. We’ll have our own movie night. It’ll be fun.”
God, I wanted that so much, but still. “All seven of them? Do you know what you’re offering, Cara?”
She waved away my concern. “Oh please, like I can’t handle that. I teach a pre-K painting class, remember?”
“They can be a lot.”
“Riot,” she said, all business. “Enough. Leave Wynter here. Go back home, take a shower, dress up all fancy, then load up your cars and bring your brood here. I promise we’ll be fine.”
I watched her for a long minute, making sure she really understood what she was getting into. Then again, Cara never said something she didn’t mean. If she was telling me to leave the kids, she meant it.
Finally, I relented. It made me feel guilty as fuck, but now that it was in my head, I realized how badly I needed this. A break from the world that was imploding around me and just being with Koa sounded incredible.
I kissed her cheek. “Thank you, Cara. You’re a lifesaver.”
Her cheeks flushed. “I know. Now, go. We’ll be here when you get back.”
I bounded out of the store feeling more energized than I had in ages. Before pulling out, I quickly sent a text to Koa, letting him know not to start dinner and to jump in the shower.
I got the Carlton dancing GIF back before I’d even gotten out of the parking lot. He clearly needed this as much as I did.
“When was the last time we went to a restaurant, just the two of us?” I asked as I scooped an ungodly amount of salsa onto my chip. But fuck, the homemade salsa in this place was so fucking good, and I could not get enough.
Koa sipped on his margarita and watched me with amusement. For some reason I’d never understand, he hated tomatoes, so he was not partaking in this goodness. We’d gotten guac for the table, which he was enjoying, but it wasn’t the same.
“Um, never?”
That sobered me up for a second while I flashed back through our lives. Hell, Koa was right. We’d never been out to eat just the two of us, ever.
I hadn’t eaten out much in general, especially in nicer places like this.
As a kid, the dollar menu at fast food restaurants had been the most I could ever afford, and then after, we’d struggled for so long to even keep the kids, a luxury like this had been so far from my mind, it wasn’t funny.
Even when things had started to get good, when my career had begun to build up and Koa had had a stable income, we’d still had seven kids.
We were rarely completely alone, and I couldn’t think of one instance in the last seven years that we’d carved out time just for ourselves.
“Fuck, that’s not right, Ko. We gotta do this more often.”
“Go on dates?”
“Yeah, why not? Best friends can go on dates. Husbands go on dates.”
Koa hummed thoughtfully but otherwise stayed quiet. He took a sip of his drink, looking away from me. Something felt off, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. Had I said something wrong?
The food finally came, and for a few minutes we busied ourselves with that. Eventually, the comfortable chatter came back, and whatever that strange moment had been all but left my mind.
“Do you think Cara will get Wynter talking to us again?” I asked as I filled my fajita.
Koa shrugged. “I don’t know. If anyone has a shot, it’s her. What did the lawyer say about Aren’s chance of getting custody?”
I made a face. I didn’t even want to think about it. “Slim. But he might get supervised visits, and I’m not sure I’ll be able to fight that.”
Koa frowned, and I could see how pissed he was. I knew he remembered that day as well as I did. He’d saved me. I fully believe I would’ve died if Koa hadn’t gotten there when he had. I owed both him and Knox my life.
“I don’t like it,” he grumped.
“Yeah, me either. Hopefully, he does something to fuck up his parole before it gets that far.”
We thankfully moved on to other subjects after that. He talked about his team and the chances of them making the championship this year. I told him about my newest commission. We came up with a schedule to get Bel to his piano lessons and Rue and Cruz to their jujitsu class.
A good hour passed before we knew it. We got the bill and to-go boxes, and I most certainly did not use one to take the chips and salsa.
“What do you want to do after this?” I asked. We still had time before we had to pick up the kids.
Koa chewed his lip like he was almost embarrassed to tell me. Then, “Wanna go pick up those fancy brownies from Daisy’s Diner and then go home and watch Scream?”
That was Koa’s comfort movie and go-to watch whenever he was feeling out of sorts.
He’d once told me his parents had finally let him watch it with them a couple of months before they’d died, so it reminded him of them.
We’d watched it so many times that first year he’d lived here that at five years old, Knox had walked around quoting it.
Something was definitely wrong, especially if he wanted to eat sweets and watch Scream.
I thought about calling him on it, but then his eyes met mine and I could see he was practically begging me not to push.
What he needed now was a night on the couch and his favorite movie.
I was more than happy to give it to him. I’d give him anything he needed.
“Sounds perfect.”
We put on our jackets and grabbed the bag of leftovers.
As we walked out, I slipped my hand in Koa’s.
It wasn’t anything unusual for us. I was sure most people would think it was weird for best friends, but we’d always been like that.
Even when I’d been younger and would flinch at the slightest touch, I’d craved Koa’s.
And honestly, I didn’t give a fuck about what anyone thought about our relationship.
Koa smiled softly at me, his thumb rubbing over the back of my hand in a comfort gesture. He always did that, and I wasn’t sure he even realized it.
We walked hand in hand out of the restaurant and toward my SUV, and the nerves I felt about Koa started to settle. Whatever was going on with him, he’d tell me when he was ready. I just had to be patient.