Chapter 20 Riot
Riot
I adjusted my beanie so it was fully covering my ears before taking Koa’s hand again.
It was a cold night, even more so than normal for early December, but it was also River Hills’ annual holiday festival.
It was a big deal around here, second only to homecoming.
The whole downtown area had been decked out in Christmas lights and holiday decorations.
A huge tree was donated every year for the square, and everyone came to shop local vendors, see Santa Claus, and have a good time.
The past few years, I’d worked my own booth with Cara, switching out every hour so I could spend time with the kids as well.
But Cara had just left the inpatient rehab right after Thanksgiving and was still recovering.
I’d considered doing the booth myself but had decided against it.
After everything, I wanted to dedicate all my time to my family without having to worry about work.
We did have a stand where people could fill out inquiries and place them in a box that I could go over in my own time, with some of the parents volunteering to man it, but that was the extent of it.
We walked through the entranceway, which was decorated as a winter wonderland complete with pink and white sparkly garland, lights, big, brightly colored bows, and more.
We hadn’t even gotten fully inside yet and the kids were already in awe.
Even Wynter and Knox had been impressed before they’d ditched us for their friends.
There was a new theme every year, and they always decorated accordingly so it was new and exciting, and people would talk for weeks about what to expect for the decor.
This year’s was Candy Land, so in addition to the more traditional holiday items, there were oversized lollipops tucked into the lattice of the walkway.
Light-up candy canes lined both paths. There was plenty of color everywhere, and rumor was that there would be “elves” running around, handing out candy. The twins were fucking psyched.
I pulled Hawk and Storm in their wagon while Koa walked next to me, holding my free hand. The boys were bouncing with energy in front of us, completely bundled up in their coats, gloves, and hats. They were all wearing light-up Christmas light necklaces.
We’d lost sight of Knox and Wynter, and I was a bit of a wreck about Wynter going off on her own, but the day after Thanksgiving we’d gotten a call that the police had found Aren and he was back in jail.
It was time to give her back her freedom, even if it was hard.
It would be a long time before we’d have to worry about him again, if ever.
“Can we go to the rides first?” Bel asked once we were past the entrance.
“Sure,” I said with a smile.
My first one of these had only been a few years ago, once Koa and I had been married.
Even if I could have afforded to take the kids here, I would’ve never exposed them like that.
Back then, we’d been the pariahs of this town, and all the looks and whispers would’ve sent me running.
It still happened occasionally, but it was much tamer now.
Koa’s aunt still loved spreading rumors and talking about us nonstop, but once my career started to take off and the town realized I wouldn’t be the leech my parents were, they’d come around.
I probably should be pissed that none of these people had been here for me when I’d needed them, but honestly I was just relieved the kids wouldn’t have to go through all the shit I’d had to.
It wasn’t perfect, some of Knox’s and Wynter’s struggles had made that clear, but it was better, and for whatever reason, this fucking place was home for me.
Maybe it was because it was where I’d met Koa, where Cara had given me a chance at a real life.
Maybe it was because I was too afraid of change and was clinging to any scrap of stability I could find.
Whatever it was, I wasn’t leaving River Hills, and finally felt like less of an outsider.
The fair was split into two different parts. The vendors and Christmas market were first. This was also where all the food was. Behind it were the rides. The Ferris wheel was already visible, even from this distance, all lit up in red and green.
“We gotta buy tickets first!” Koa called out with a laugh as the boys nearly sprinted to the rides. “Come here for a sec.”
“Hi, Mr. Williams!” the teenage girl at the ticket booth said to Koa as we walked up.
“Hi, Savannah. They roped you into the ticket booth this year?”
She rolled her eyes. “Yeah. I wanted to take pictures in Santa’s cottage. Heat, you know? Plus, I like photography. But here I am. At least I have a space heater in here.”
“That’s good. Maybe you’ll be able to get the job for the spring one.”
“Yeah, maybe. Do y’all want tickets?”
“Yes, please. We’ll take three all-access bracelets. The little ones don’t need them, right?”
Savannah leaned forward so she could get a better glimpse of Storm and Hawk. “Nope, five and under can ride for free. And you two can ride for free if you have the little kids with you.”
Savannah rang up our purchases and helped the kids get their bracelets on.
Koa said goodbye to his student, and then we walked toward the sound of kids screaming.
Of course, the twins couldn’t agree on where to start.
Cruz seemed happy with whatever, so I took Bel, Cruz, and Storm, and Koa went the other way with Rue and Hawk.
We agreed to meet back near the ticket booth in an hour so we could all go on the Ferris wheel together.
Their first stop was the Tilt-A-Whirl. Stormy was too small for it, so we waited on the other side of the safety railing, waving whenever we saw Bel and Cruz and taking pictures.
Next were the little cars that went in a circle around the track that Bel volunteered to take Storm on.
The fair was well organized and thankfully there weren’t many lines, despite how crowded it was.
So we were able to get through everything the boys wanted, plus a few for Storm before it was time to meet Koa.
“Ri, can Rue, Cruz, and I ride in our own car on the Ferris wheel?”
I nodded. “Yeah, as long as the three of you promise to stay together and wait for us right by the exit if you get off first.”
“Yeah, we will!” At that moment, Koa appeared with the boys.
“Guess what, we can ride alone!” Bel called out excitedly.
“As long as you stick together!” I reminded him. “And don’t leave the area.”
“Awesome!” Rue shouted, giving his brother a high five.
Koa just laughed. He was carrying Hawk, who looked over the whole thing. He was sucking his thumb, which he rarely did anymore, and seemed a little zoned out.
“Yeah. One of the rides was a little loud for him. But he said he still wants to try the Ferris wheel.”
I was a little nervous because if he changed his mind, there was nothing we could do about it until the ride was over. But if he was sure, I wanted him to have his chance.
The line was longer for the Ferris wheel than for anything else.
It was always the big attraction at the festival.
From the top, you could see the whole town, including the river that had given River Hills its name, and my personal favorite spot because of what it meant to Koa and me.
Teenagers loved it because it was private and romantic, and younger kids got a thrill from the height.
Me, I wasn’t the biggest fan of any ride, especially one that involved being that far off the ground, but I wanted to see Storm’s and Hawk’s reactions, so I dutifully climbed into the cab with Koa and the younger ones, once we’d seen the boys get on safely.
I sat with Hawk on my lap while Koa had Storm. Our thighs were pressed up against each other’s and his hand was squeezing my knee tightly. “You know you don’t have to do this, right?”
I glared at him from the corner of my eye. “Oh, I know. I want to. Besides, it’s romantic, isn’t it?”
Koa snorted. “Yup, so romantic.” He gestured to the kids and I shrugged. We didn’t get privacy often, so I would take it.
It was still a little weird thinking in those terms. And it made me feel like an ass for how long it had taken me to put it all together.
I had been neglecting one of Koa’s needs all this time and hadn’t even realized it.
Which, to be fair, he’d made damn sure to keep that quiet, but still, I kind of wanted to make up for it now.
Not that I had a clue how to do that, but snuggling up with him on the ride was a good start. Even if we had the kids with us.
Despite my best effort, Koa had been right and we didn’t exactly have time for dates or private time to explore this new dynamic together.
We hadn’t done much more when it came to sexual exploration either.
I’d told Koa I was willing, but he seemed content with cuddling and kissing and the occasional mutual hand job in the shower.
Maybe it would become more than that, but whatever happened, it would be with Koa.
The ride lurched to a stop at the top. My stomach dropped and maybe I squeezed Hawk just a little too tightly, but fuck, I did not like how the cart rocked.
Instead of making fun of me, Koa just brought me closer.
“We’re okay, baby. Look, you can see everything.”
I didn’t want to open my eyes. I wanted to stay right where I was and count down the seconds until the ride started to move again.
But Hawk was already wiggling in my lap, trying to get closer, so I had no choice but to slide with him so he could look out the window.
It was dark, but that meant nothing since everything was lit up with Christmas lights.
I could probably see for miles. It was hard to make out the river in the darkness, but I knew where it was and looked in that direction.
“We should go back there soon. It’s been a while.”
Koa hummed in agreement. “Too long.”
Some of my memories of it were a little bittersweet.
That had been my safe space, my solace when I just couldn’t take another fucking minute in that trailer.
But it also was a stark reminder of where I’d come from.
That was probably why I hadn’t gone over there in well over a year.
Still, it was sentimental, and I wanted that peace again.
That time that was just mine and Koa’s without the real world barreling down on us.
Right when I was convinced that the Ferris wheel had gotten stuck and we’d be up here until a firefighter came and rescued us, it began to move again. Storm squealed in excitement. I clutched Koa tightly.
“I love you so much,” he whispered in my ear. “Even you being scared of a ride is adorable.”
I scowled at him but kissed his cheek anyway. “I love you too. Otherwise I wouldn’t be on this damn thing.”
He chuckled and held me tightly until we were finally safely on the ground.