Chapter 3
THREE
JHIN
Kit: Hello. I’m Kit. I was supposed to be with you guys as Juniper’s heat buddy, but I was sick. Juniper was pretty stressed, but I know she liked you a lot. Would you give her another chance? Perhaps we could meet your pack for coffee and explain?
The message had come through this morning.
I’d called a pack meeting to discuss.
“No,” Vander said. His arms were folded across his chest. “I don’t know what this Kit dude is smoking. She did not like us .”
“Need I remind you,” I said, my voice calm. “That you are the reason we need this in the first place. And it worked , Vander.”
It had. Not to the degree I’d hoped, but he was more present than he’d been in a while. It had stopped the rut he’d been building up to. Of course, we might not need this if he would just open up. His bond was completely shuttered from the moment he woke up to the moment he slept. His control only failed him when he was rutting, which was pretty much useless for finding out why it was happening.
I’d tried to get him to talk about it, but he refused that, too.
Sometimes I was tempted to open my bond, to see if it might help. Ez and Adrian’s connection did help soothe him at times.
I held back because, if I opened up, it would become obvious how…. strong my feelings for Vander were. I was pack lead, and it was my duty to be responsible. To be aware that there was a power imbalance here, and the last thing I wanted was for Vander to feel pressure to reciprocate or respond to my feelings because I was in charge. And I needed to be fair to Adrian and Ez. They needed to be able to trust that I could be impartial, and treat them all equally.
I turned to Ez.
“What do you think?” I asked him. He sighed.
“I think I’m in love, dude,” he said, and Adrian and Vander both groaned.
“That’s the sex talking,” Vander said.
“No, for real. I mean, the sex was like perfect, but I think I love her, too. She’s all scary and prickly, but inside she was really sweet. I’d marry her.” He leaned back in his seat, satisfied.
“I will count that as a vote in favour,” I said, shaking my head. “Adrian?”
Adrian’s eyes dropped to the ground, and he gave a shrug.
“Yeah, she was cool,” he muttered.
“I will count that as a yes, also.”
“I think you’re all forgetting the part where she sneered at us and told us she never wanted to see us again,” said Vander.
“You say shit like that all the time, but you’re secretly nice, too,” Ez said. “So, technically, if she doesn’t deserve a chance, you don’t either. Check. Mate.”
He folded his arms and leaned back on the couch, very pleased with himself. Vander glared at him.
“No offence, V, but she could be good for you,” said Adrian, running his fingers through his hair.
“What does that mean?" he snapped.
“He means we need someone with a backbone who can deal with your bullshit,” said Ez, delightedly.
“He has a point,” I said. “And you two don’t need to like each other. She needs alphas for heats. We need omegas for balance. We could build something on that.”
“Whatever,” muttered Vander. “I’m outvoted anyway, so it doesn’t really matter. We done?”
He didn’t wait for an answer before storming off to our room.
“Sick,” said Ez.
I was relieved. We’d all been put on medical leave after the incident , but Vander hadn’t bounced back like we had. He’d already been unstable for years, but he’d seemed to break completely afterwards. This was hope.
Plus, I would really like to see her again.
Despite her outburst—likely borne of stress—I was intrigued by the fact she ran the Safe House.
It must have taken someone with a lot of passion to set up and manage something so omega-centric. In my research to arrange us attending a heat, there was a disturbing amount of programs that seemed to exploit the omegas involved, treating them like commodities. The Safe House had been different the moment I clicked on the poorly-coded website. Instead of being designed for alphas, it spoke mainly to omegas, promising safety and care. Someone who ran that seemed like the kind of person I’d want to get to know.
I reached into my pocket, touching the handkerchief she’d wiped her eyes with. I couldn’t get her out of my head. How she’d been so tense, so angry until that one moment. How brave she’d been with tears sparkling in her eyes, lip trembling, trying to pretend she wasn’t crying. How her eyes had crinkled at my laugh.
Yes, it would be very nice to see her again.
JUNIPER
The heat and pain had come back in the middle of the night, and I’d crawled to the bathroom, turning the shower to cold. I forced down some painkillers and told myself I could do this.
Thankfully, it passed, but I’d traded the pain for a whole different slew of shitty symptoms. Still, I was here, parked outside our local coffee shop for this date. Ready to bow my head, apologise, and not bite any heads off.
We got out of the car, and Kit tugged the collar of his turtleneck up to his chin. He slipped his hand into mine and squeezed, giving me a smile.
“You look great. Like a snack,” he said.
“Great. My lifelong dream,” I replied flatly, and he laughed.
I’d let him help pick my outfit, and so I had ended up with thigh-length stockings beneath a pleated miniskirt, and one of his knitted sweaters over top. I’d even given in and let him do—a bit—of makeup. I’m sure I’d looked like a complete mess during my heat, and I wanted to show that I could look like a normal person, too. Although I shouldn’t really care, because, as I kept reminding myself, I was doing this for Kit.
I wasn’t used to having so much skin exposed while out—I usually wanted to do the opposite of attracting attention. I tugged my skirt down a bit, then glanced at him.
“Hang on. Are you matching me?” I asked. He gave a cheeky grin. He wasn’t in a miniskirt, but our colors coordinated, and his sweater was almost identical to mine in a different shade.
“Couldn’t resist,” he said, then turned toward the coffee shop, leading us in. “I’ve got a good feeling about this, Juni.”
I nodded glumly, adding it to my list of suspicions that he was ready to leave. But, I did feel better with him here. More settled. Ready to face this pack again.
We stepped inside and Kit tugged me to the counter. It wasn’t busy, and we were soon grabbing our orders and finding a table.
Kit sat with his knees up, holding his mocha with both hands.
I gripped my black coffee with both hands as well, shifting as my thighs stuck uncomfortably to the grey plastic of the chair.
What was I supposed to say? Would just sorry do? And honestly, Vander was pretty rude too, but I had to ignore that because I wanted to make them like me. For Kit’s sake.
The stupid part of me whispered that maybe it would go well today. Maybe I’d be clever or funny again and Jhin would smile, or I’d say yes when Ez offered to help me, and he’d give me his stunning grin. Or I’d make Adrian blush, even though I think he’d done that quite a bit already. I wasn’t stupid enough to think they’d bond me. But maybe I could still see them again, for heats?
The bell on the door jingled, and I turned around to see Jhin step inside. He looked taller, somehow, in a simple grey tee and jeans.
His eyes met mine, his expression softening and eyes moving down to my outfit. My breath caught in my lungs, my heart speeding up. I looked down at the table, hiding my face a bit behind my hair. I brought the coffee to my lips as I heard the rest of them come through the door. Were they all dressed casually? Their scents drifted over, bringing back memories.
“That must be them. Aw, Juni, they brought more flowers,” Kit said, bringing my attention back to him. I shrugged, and then he froze suddenly, the mug halfway between his face and the table.
“Oh shit," he said, eyes going wide. I snapped up, on alert, searching for the danger. The pack?
But they were all staring at Kit, just as dumbstruck as he was. Ez had a slightly awed expression on his face. Adrian was simply surprised. Vander looked angry, and Jhin was tense and pale.
There were no obvious threats, nothing for me to hit, so I glanced back at Kit.
His mug slipped from his hands and shattered on the floor, making me jump. What was going on? I glanced at him, then slid down to the mess on the floor, grabbing a fistful of napkins and tugging his arm.
“You alright? What is it?” I asked.
“Nothing," he said quickly, hands visibly shaking. “Just, um, the—they—nothing.”
Something warm bumped my elbow, and the napkins were taken from my hands, the scent of cinnamon and pear sweeping over me. I blinked at Adrian, who was next to me, helping clean up the shattered mug.
He glanced at my legs, where my miniskirt was doing a very good job of being mini and not a very good job of being a skirt. I shifted position, mortified, and to my surprise Adrian gave a panicked look up at Kit and then stared intensely at the floor, his face going completely red.
“Good god, Ez, stop drooling and grab him another coffee.” Vander elbowed Ez, who jumped into action.
“Um, what do you like?” he asked.
Kit was staring at him, his mouth slightly open.
“Mocha. Extra whip,” I snapped, sliding into the chair beside Kit.
It seemed I’d already fucked this up, and I didn’t even know what I’d done. I scooched my chair closer, letting my knee touch Kit’s, trying to push down the stupid disappointment. I shouldn’t be this surprised. His hand found mine and gripped it tightly.
I just had to apologise, and then maybe we could leave. But I was a lot less confident that I could do this with Kit acting so weird. He was supposed to be feeding me happy, calm vibes, not this tense, electrical awkwardness.
Jhin hadn’t moved, still frozen by the door. His eyes darted from me to Kit, and back again, looking deeply pained.
“For fuck’s sake,” Vander said, practically dragging Jhin into one of the chairs, sitting down heavily beside him with a glower. Adrian sat, too, staring intently at the ground.
All of them jumped when Ez returned, setting the mocha down in front of Kit.
“Thanks,” Kit said quietly, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. I sank lower in my seat, moving closer to him.
They lapsed into silence again before Vander tugged Ez down into a chair.
Then Vander snorted and leaned forward, unfolding his arms and giving me a fake smile. His voice was dripping with sarcasm.
“Hi. Good morning, Juniper. It’s so lovely to see you again. These are for you ." He tugged the bouquet from Jhin’s death grip and placed them in front of me on the table. My headache was getting worse, and my lip trembled. “Not that it matters now, anyway. Why don’t I save you some time and just throw them right in the trash?”
Jhin and Kit both winced, and I swallowed loudly.
“Don’t be an ass, Vander,” muttered Adrian.
“Me!?” Vander gave a little laugh. “You’re the ones just sitting and staring at him while she’s left wondering what the fuck’s going on. Here, sweetheart, let me put you out of your misery. He’s?—”
Kit sprang up from his chair, knocking into the table and causing his coffee to spill all over Vander, who was sitting opposite him. Kit’s face went as pink as his hair as he scrambled to pick up the cup.
“Oh, shit, I’m so sorry,” he said to Vander.
“I’ll get another.” Ez practically fled the table, and I swear Adrian looked wistfully after him.
Vander shook coffee out of his sleeve and snarled— snarled —at Kit, who had stepped toward him.
Now that, I knew how to deal with.
A growl left my throat, and I flew to my feet, putting myself between Kit and Vander. Kit grabbed my arm for support. Adrian groaned and put his head on the table, covering it with his arms. Jhin appeared to have broken, because he was still staring at the flowers on the table.
“Okay, you’re right, I don’t know what the fuck is going on here, but you do not treat him like that,” I snapped. “It was an accident, asshole, and Kit’s probably the nicest person on the planet?—”
I cut off as I heard a sniff behind me. I turned around to see Kit’s eyes brimming with tears, and he flung his arm around me before burying his head into my shoulder.
“N—no I’m n—not," he sobbed. “I’m a—awful, Juni. T—they’re my s—scent match.”
A scent match. Mates .
I jerked back, because with those words, my soul shattered into tiny pieces. Just like the third coffee mug I knocked right out of Ez’s hands.