thirty
T he next morning, Nate woke up rested and calm, for the first time in days.
There had been no nightmares, no disturbing dreams, no sweat sticking his clothes to his body and cooling his skin.
Rising from the bed, he went through his morning routine, after which he called his work to inform he’d be working from home that day.
He could go through his workload later, it was nothing he couldn’t do from home.
Plus, that way they would probably start laying a bit off him for the job opening he’d turned down. But none of that mattered right now.
Coffee was the next necessary step since nothing could be done without it.
The scent of the dark roast filled his nostrils as he waited, leaning against the counter, and the memory of espresso-filled chocolate by a certain Italian grandma made him grin in the emptiness of his kitchen.
His grin fell slightly as the coffee machine beeped and his lips pursed in steely determination.
Pouring his coffee in a mug, he located his phone and found the name he was looking for. Four rings went through before the call connected.
“Were you dreaming about me or something?” Cooper’s voice came groggy through the receiver.
“That’s no way to say good morning.” Nate couldn’t help the small chuckle that escaped.
“A good morning, asshole, would have been at least two hours from now.” Coop’s voice paused. “And did you just chuckle? Who are you and what have you done with my buddy?”
Nate almost released a second chuckle before he decided he didn’t want to test his luck with Coop so early in the morning. It was just impossible to contain the lightness he was feeling. It was worth it even if he had to risk his friend’s wrath.
“I need your help.”
He heard Cooper cursing softly, probably realizing he wasn’t going back to sleep.
“What do you need?”
Nate hesitated for a moment before deciding to get straight to the point.
“I remembered everything, Coop. Everything Madison-wise.”
A sharp inhale and then, “Seriously?”
“Yeah. And I have to find her. The problem is that the only ways I can think of are semi-legal, so I’d rather try your way first,” he gritted out. Cooper was never going to let him live this down.
“Oh really?” Nate could practically hear the glee in Cooper’s voice. “And what way would that be, pray tell?”
He was going to have him spell it out, wasn’t he?
“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”
“Immensely.”
Nate sighed. “I need access to your social media skills.”
Even uttering those words was painful to Nate.
The thing was that Nate knew he could be considered a paradox given the nature of his job. Perhaps since his dealt with data analysis, someone would think that he would be involved in all matters of technology and information.
On the contrary, he abhorred social media. Sure, he’d gone through a short phase of experimentation back when it had all been new and exciting, but it had soon lost its appeal for him.
He did recognize one useful quality though.
“Are you telling me we’re going social media-stalking?” Coop’s voice sounded both amused and slightly shocked. And too pleased for his own good.
Nate winced. “Not the term I would have liked but yeah.”
“Would you have preferred ‘information hunting?’”
“You’re already getting on my last nerve.”
Cooper laughed. “Okay, okay. I’ll be there in an hour. Make sure you have coffee.”
Nate couldn’t help the smile that stretched his lips. “Will do.”
Which was where they found themselves a little while later, camped in Nate’s living room, his laptop open in front of them, as Cooper juggled with half a dozen open tabs.
“Does this look like her?” Coop asked for what felt like the hundredth time. Nate knew it wasn’t, it was just that his impatience was starting to make him jittery.
He studied the profile Coop was showing him. The picture was of a dark-haired girl but it was taken from too far away to tell, and her other ones were private. He then noticed the location of residence listed and turned a blank look at his friend.
“This person lives in Canada.”
“So?”
“Do we live in Canada?”
“Nooo,” Coop said, dragging the word, “but she could. Maybe that’s where her permanent residence is.”
A brief jolt of unease went through Nate before he squashed it down.
“No, she has to live somewhere nearby. That’s why we bumped into each other so early in the morning the day of the accident.” Nate would accept no other option. “She has to.”
He felt Cooper’s eyes boring on him before a strong hand squeezed his shoulder.
“Okay, bud. Don’t worry, she’s here somewhere. We’ll find her.”
Nate nodded, more to convince himself than anything else.
“Hey, what if she doesn’t have a photo of herself but something else as a profile picture? Maybe we’ve missed her because of that.”
Nate thought about it and the more he did, the more it sounded like something that could be possible.
“Look for a profile that has something to do with books, or anime, or art of some kind.”
A few more minutes passed in silence before, “Hey, check out this one.”
Nate pulled the laptop closer to him.
The profile picture was the face of an anime girl in a futuristic context, with wavy green hair, glasses, and a forlorn look in her eyes. Below it were the words, Madison Pierce.
It was in no way enough evidence to prove that this was the Madison Pierce he was looking for but judging by the way his heart sped up his body had no qualms believing it.
She didn’t have any pictures of herself, or at least any that were public, but her profile was riddled with book quotes and artsy drawings. Moving to her personal information, he sent a prayer to whoever was listening that there was some clue about her there.
She worked in a publishing house.
In a small publishing house that was listed in an area very close to him.
“It’s her,” he whispered.
“Are you sure?” Coop asked, his voice betraying an excitement that Nate didn’t dare display yet.
“It has to be. I mean, everything seems to match.” He sank into the couch, his body sagging under tentative relief. “If it’s not her, then this is a horrible coincidence.”
Nate felt a hand slap him across his upper arm. Quite hard.
“What the hell, man?!”
“Don’t what the hell me,” Cooper said, pointing a finger in his face. “I will not sit here and listen to you be all pessimistic and the woe is me, got it? If you believe this is her, then believe this is her.”
They looked at each other before they both started chuckling. Cooper’s voice sounded quite shrill when he got worked up.
“So, what happens now?”
Nate hadn’t thought that far ahead, but to say that he was determined to figure it out was the understatement of the century.
“Now I go to her.”
He knew it probably wasn’t as simple as he made it sound.
Clearly, he couldn’t just barge into her place of work demanding that she appear from somewhere.
Even though that was exactly what his instincts were telling him to do.
To not let one more minute go to waste. To rectify immediately the situation he had put both of them in.
To see with his own eyes that everything that had started building between them was still there and salvageable.
The alternative was not an option.
So why not just go there? What was the worst thing that could happen?
Nate winced internally. Many things actually.
But he had no other way to contact her so an office visit would have to do.
“Uh, Nate? You’re spacing out hard, buddy, and you’re starting to freak me out a little bit,” Cooper’s voice cut through his spiraling thoughts.
“Sorry about that, man. I was just thinking about the chances of screwing everything up even more if I go there with no warning after all these weeks.”
Cooper seemed to mull his words over.
“I mean, how could it be worse than what you’re already going through? Both of you probably.”
And that was exactly the crux of Nate’s worry and unease.
He’d seen how Madison had looked at him.
He’d seen the deep-seated hurt in her eyes as she’d taken in his blank expression.
He couldn’t even imagine the pain of being forgotten by someone that had been holding you and kissing you only moments before.
Because New Year’s Eve would have felt just moments before for her.
One minute there, and the next gone. Faster than blinking.
Maybe she’d want him to stay away now. Maybe the damage would be irreparable. Maybe he had lost her.
But he had to try. He wouldn’t let her slip away without a fight, not when she could be so much. When she could be everything. He wouldn’t let this go.
He’d promised himself that he’d do this right.
And that’s what he was going to do.
“Okay that look on your face tells me that someone has made their decision.” Cooper threw a conspiratorial look at him that promised nothing good.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Nothing, I was just imagining the whole scene; you, throwing the doors open like a prince coming to claim his princess, a wind blowing from somewhere ruffling your hair, everyone else looking on speechless, their mouths hanging open, while you scoop in, grab her, and ride into the sunset.” Cooper finished his description and turned to look at Nate expectantly.
Who surely must have had the blankest expression on his face.
“Okay I might have embellished a little,” he trailed off, to which Nate coughed, “a little” under his breath, “but the gist is there!”
Nate couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped him seeing his friend so worked up on his behalf. He slapped a hand on his shoulder. “You’re a good friend, Coop.”
“I know I am, asshole! That’s why we need to strategize. Are we going for something simple or a grand gesture? Maybe some sky lettering that will say ‘I’m an idiot for forgetting about you?’ No? Too much?”
“You know, the scariest thing of all is that I can’t tell if you’re serious or not.”
“Har har, and that’s what I get for handing out precious advice.”
“Yes, thank you for your precious advice but since I have no idea what she must have been thinking all this time, maybe it’s better if I just find her and talk to her.”
Cooper sighed dramatically. “Boring, but you know her better than I do,” he said, but Nate could tell that all of it was just his friend’s way of getting him out of his head. Nate just couldn’t help riling him up.
He shook his head emphatically. “Next time, I’m asking Liam for advice.”
“Hey!” came Cooper’s squawk of betrayal.
Nate was already laughing. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding.”
“You’d better be. Now, get to planning, lover boy.”