Chapter 29
twenty-nine
PATRICK
I swallow down the shocked gasp from her lips and drink up the tiny moan that follows as Jo slowly sinks into the kiss. Her shoulders relax, but I don’t dare let go of her, keeping us fitted together.
Despite wanting to lose myself in this kiss, I can’t ignore her admission.
“ I told you, Carrie and I have never been involved.”
She rests her forehead against my chin, mumbling her words into my chest. “ I wasn’t jealous about that.”
“ What are you jealous of then?” I ask.
Looking up at sky, she swallows, and twists her well-kissed lips to the side. “ I have no right to be. I left. We never even spoke about where we saw our relationship going…”
And it hits me. What she’s jealous of. She’s not jealous of Carrie and me, but what we have.
Lottie .
A child together.
My heart spasms in pain, but also in hope. When she left, we’d only slept together once, but it was enough to see a future together. Or at least for me it was and it’s clear those feelings weren’t unrequited like I once thought. I don’t have the words to comfort her, because Carrie and I do share a child. I don’t need to tell Jo that Lottie wouldn’t be here if she hadn’t left, that truth is written all over her face. We’ll never know what could have happened between us if she’d stayed. But the idea of her carrying my child? Just picturing it sends me wild.
Is that something we could have one day?
Words might be useless right now, so I use my actions instead. I need to show her that she’s the only one I want to take each next step with, no matter how slow we take them.
Grabbing her hand, I walk us back toward my truck, pulling Jo behind.
“ Patrick , where are we going now?” she asks in confusion.
When I scan the empty parking lot again, I reach for the door handle on the passenger side and fling it open.
“ We can’t change what happened or our time apart, but I need you to know I’m choosing you now. I never stopped choosing you. There hasn’t been a day since you left where I haven’t thought about you. If you want to do this, get in the truck, because the last two weeks have been torture. If you’re not ready yet, let me know and I will drive you home. We can watch those nineties sitcoms you love so much or do a jigsaw puzzle, I don’t care what we do. Tonight you’re mine. And I need you to know one thing.” I close the short distance between us. “ What happened, happened; it’s in the past, but this moment right now…” I point to the ground beneath our feet and keep my gaze locked with hers. “ It’s ours. Let’s forget about everyone else and what could have been. I’ve waited six years, and I don’t want to wait another second.”
I worry I’ve stunned her to silence, but when she speaks, her voice strains from all the emotions I see on her face. “ Wait another second for what?”
“ To be with you again. To feel you around me. Fuck , I’m desperate for you, love. I’ll wait, just don’t push me away. Let me be the arms you fall into when your days are tough.”
Her chest rises and falls rapidly, emotions swirling in her eyes, but I don’t see indecision there.
I see want and lust.
When she throws herself at me and our lips collide again, there’s not more waiting, and I know there’s no looking back.
Turning us so her back is to the open passenger door, I wrap my hands around the backs of her thighs, and she gasps in surprise as I hoist her up onto the bench seat.
Her tits are now at the perfect height, and I waste no time in getting my hands on them, molding my palms to the small handfuls through the soft material of her sweater. My hands trail to the hem of her sweater, and I give her a moment to object before I’m ripping it over her head.
The sight before me is one I would pay an artist to paint, just to hang it up in my bedroom and selfishly hide it away from the world. Baby -blue lace holds up her heaving chest, sheer enough that her rosy-pink nipples poke through, begging for my tongue and hands.
My mouth covers one, sucking it hard through the lace, pulling another sharp gasp from her. I forgot how vocal she is, and I’m desperate to hear all the sounds she’s going make as she writhes beneath me, completely at my mercy. Her hand flies to the back of my head while the other stays propped up behind her. I trace her nipple with my tongue and slip it under the delicate material, teasing the soft slope of her breast. One hand remains on Jo’s hip while the other pulls down the lace cup, and my lips descend again to suck the hardened peak into my mouth.
“ Oh god, that feels amazing.” Her legs widen, and I step in closer, grinding myself against the apex of her thighs.
As I continue sucking, biting, and pulling, Jo’s hands creep under the hem of my T -shirt. I suck in a sharp breath when her cold fingers sweep across my stomach. She laughs, but it dies on her lips when I close my teeth around her nipple, clamping down, before soothing the sting away with my tongue. Her fingertips trace every dip and curve of my abs, slowly making her way up to my nipples and circling them gently. When she reaches the trail of hair disappearing south, she pauses and hooks a finger into my belt loop and tugs my upper half into the cab of the truck. The teasing touches have my cock growing incredibly uncomfortable in my jeans and my balls feel heavy.
“ I want to suck your cock.” Her eyes look innocent, but the quirk of her mouth suggests otherwise.
“ Jesus , are you trying to kill me?” I laugh between her cleavage while she works on undoing my belt.
When she starts to lower my zipper, I stop her with a hand to her wrists. She pouts as I bring her fingers to my lips, dotting each knuckle with a kiss.
“ Why did you stop me?”
“ As much as I’d love that, I don’t think I’ll last long.” Reaching out, I trace along her cupid’s bow with my finger.
“ What are we going to do?” she asks and then nips at the tip of my fingers, before giving me a coy grin.
“ I’m going to fuck you in my truck, that’s what. I should take my time with you, but it’s going to be hard and fast, dirty and rough.” I pull at her plump bottom lip until her pink tongue peeks out. “ I’ll find something to do with this mouth next time.”
I lean back and look down the length of her body, trying to work out the logistics of how we’re going to do this. My fingers travels over her neck, in between her breasts and taut stomach. Goose bumps follow my path and that blush I love dusts her skin.
When I reach the top of her leggings, I pause. “ Can I take these off?”
She nods and chews on her bottom lip, eyes falling to where my index fingers hook into the waistband of her the leggings. She shuffles backward on the leather seat, shimmies out of her leggings, and kicks off her sneakers. I don’t even attempt to hide the appreciative groan that rumbles out of me as I take in the heady view in front of me. Wrapped up in blue lace on the dark leather bench, looking like a fucking vision.
The front of her matching lace panties are darker between her thighs, and because it’s my favorite position to be in when around Jo , I drop to my knees on the running board. I don’t waste a second before my face falls in between her luscious thighs and I’m inhaling her sweet, musky scent.
My knuckles skate along the damp lace, and when I find her clit through the material, I put pressure on where I know she’s aching for my touch. Slow circles have her moaning and writhing, begging for more. Her eyes burn with desire and her mouth is slightly open as she looks down at me with heavy breaths to match my own.
“ Is this all for me, love?” My gaze drops to her open thighs. I replace my fingers with my tongue, and even through the fabric covering her, the taste of her drives me wild. Slipping a finger into her panties where they’re wedged between her pussy lips, I pull them to the side and groan when I see her glistening in front of me. “ Look . At . You . All pink, gorgeous, and wet. This is only ever for me.” It’s not a question. I’m leaning back in to give her one slow lick with the flat of my tongue, not giving her the chance to say otherwise.“ You’re all ready for my cock, aren’t you, greedy girl?”
Her hips rise off the seat, and a gasp that sounds a lot like yes escapes with it. I place a gentle kiss on her clit before rising to my feet. As much as I’d love to feel her come on my tongue again, my aching cock lets me know I’ll blow my load in the next few minutes if I’m not inside her soon.
Taking hold of her ankles, she lets out a yelp as I drag her toward me along the bench and secure her legs around my waist. Holding her to my chest, I maneuver us into the truck so I’m sitting on the passenger seat as she straddles me. The door slams closed, and the moment I seal us inside, our mouths reunite.
I drift my palms up her full hips, follow the dip of her waist, skimming all the way up until my hand frames her face, pulling us apart.
Her eyes are heavy, and as she looks through the fogged-out windows, they widen when she remembers where we are.
“ We can do this here, or I’ll drive us to my house. You choose.”
I’ll drive us back if she asks, but she doesn’t. She doesn’t say anything, just grinds herself against my dick and turns her head until her lips graze my thumb.
When she sucks it into her mouth and hums around it, that’s answer enough.
“ Fuck . You’re a filthy girl. Lift up for me,” I say and tap her hip lightly. Rising to her knees on either side of my hips, I pick up where she left off with my zipper, and then push my jeans and briefs down. Once my cock springs free between us, Jo sits settles back on to my thighs.
Her eyes heat when they fall to my painfully hard cock. I fist myself and give a few pulls, pre-cum pooling at the tip. Her tongue traces her lips hungrily as she sits there mesmerized by the twist and turn of my fist.
Fuck , would I love to trace and smear myself across those pouty lips.
I bring my index finger to her chin, raising her needy stare to meet my own.
“ Johanna , keep staring at my cock like that and I’ll be painting those pouty lips with my cum, and this will be over before you know it.” Though I doubt I’ll last five minutes once I’m inside of her.
“ It’s a pretty dick,” she responds with a shrug. Her words have said dick twitching between us. She smirks at the sight and her hands drift to the hem of my T -shirt. I raise my hands in silent offering, and she pulls it off and over my head.
“ You know exactly what to say to a man.” With a firm grip on her hips, I grind myself up into her, so she knows just how ready I am. “ Hard and fast now. Next time I’ll spend hours between these thighs and show you exactly what we’ve been missing out on.”
“ Next time, huh?” she teases.
“ Yes , next time. How about you stop sassing me and sit on my cock? If we’re doing this here, I want a perfect view of you bouncing up and down on my lap.”
“ That mouth,” she says and shakes her head in pleasured shock. When she rises to her knees again, I tug her closer until she hovers above me. She might have a sassy mouth, but I don’t miss the way she glows whenever I tell her what to do. I wonder what else she would do if I asked.
With a shaky hand, she pulls her panties to the side to reveal her glistening pussy and lowers herself until my tip teases her entrance.
“ Oh fuck,” she mutters as she glides herself across the head of my dick, coating me in her.
Oh fuck, indeed.
I’m not even inside her yet, but her teasing has me feeling tipsy. I grab the base of my cock and rest my other hand on the crease where her thigh and hip meet. Inch by glorious inch, I guide her down my length.
“ Christ , you feel amazing.” I stare at where I’m disappearing inside her. “ So fucking tight. Don’t move, fuck, I need a minute.”
“ Patrick ,” she whines. My eyes clench closed at the sensation, and I try to find some semblance of control so I’m not rutting into her like my brain is screaming at me to do. She wiggles her hips in a silent plea, and her legs tremble as she hovers above me. “ I need all of you. Please don’t make me wait any longer.”
“ Slow , love. Forget what I said about hard and fast, I don’t want to rush this with you.”
She nods and lowers herself a little more. It really is a tight fit. When she sinks down another couple of inches, her mouth forms into an o, but she keeps working her way down my length, and I praise her all the way.
“ Look at that.” I’m mesmerized at the sight and feeling of her tight heat wrapping around me. “ You’re taking me so well, love. You’re doing so good.” The moment her ass meets my thighs, I bottom out, and we groan in unison.
“ Oh shit, you’re so deep like this.”
My jaw cracks as I feel her clench around me. I’m so lost in her that it takes a moment for me to realize why it feels so good.
“ Shit . We didn’t use a condom.”
Our gazes drop to where I’m fully seated inside of her, and I curse. “ I’ve been tested, I’m good.” Swallowing , I bring my hand to the back of her neck, bringing her forehead to mine. “ It’s been a long time, Jo . A very long time.”
Her eyes widen in realization.
“ Always you, love. I haven’t thought about or wanted anyone else.”
“ I have an IUD , and it’s been a long time for me too. Six years, to be exact… No one else. Not ever.”
My eyes shutter closed at her words.
Six years.
I don’t know what to say to that. Words have left me. My heart soars and aches knowing she hasn’t been with anyone else since our first time. The need for her increases tenfold, desperate to feel what we’ve only experienced once before.
“ Jo ,” I whisper, my lips trailing across her neck, laying soft kisses across her flushed skin. I pull down the lace cups of her bra to reveal both breasts; the skin so soft and inviting. “ Can I move now? I really need to fuck you more than ever.”
With a wanton gaze, she nods eagerly.
“ Show me what I’ve been missing and ride me then.”
Shock paints her face at first, but then a wicked grin morphs her features, and she raises herself off me. Our moans of pleasure fill the cab when she slams herself backdown. My hands fly to her ass, holding and massaging the soft globes, holding on tightly and hoping I leave marks, as I help her find a rhythm.
Up and down, she moves, over and over.
She lets out the most exquisite moans every time her clit rubs against the base of my dick. I don’t know where to look. Everything is intoxicating, from the way her face scrunches in pleasure, to the swaying of her tits each time she meets my thighs, to watching myself glide in and out of her.
It’s slow, filthy, and sweaty. Condensation coats the windows, giving us some form of cover, but right now I don’t care what’s outside of this truck. Only she matters. The only noises that can be heard are our panting breaths, the creaking of leather, and the sounds our bodies make together.
“ Look at us, Johanna . Listen to us. Keep riding me like that, baby. What do you need?”
Her mouth falls open as I thrust up inside her, and her brows scrunch as pleasure rolls through her. “ My clit, touch my clit,” she gasps, as I drop her down roughly on my cock. My balls draw up and I need her to find her release quickly.
With my hand at the back of her neck, I pull her mouth down to mine, demanding entrance with my tongue. The kiss is hurried and messy as she continues to bounce on my lap. I bring my other hand between our sweat-soaked bodies and find her swollen clit. With my thumb, I press down and move it in quick circles, testing the pressure until she clenches harder around me, letting me know I’ve found the right spot .
“ Oh my god, yes, there. Don’t stop,” she cries against my lips. As I quicken the pace of my upward thrusts, her head falls back. I take advantage and suck, kiss, and bite my way across her neck and chest.
The base of my spine tingles, and I know I’m getting close, but like fuck am I finishing before she comes.
“ Eyes here, baby, only on me.” I continue stroking her clit, her rhythm becoming sloppy as she edges closer.
“ Oh , Patrick . I’m so close. Fuck . There . There ,” she calls out. And when I pull one of her nipples into my mouth, she explodes. The feel of her pussy fluttering around me and the cries that fill my truck have me hurtling toward my own orgasm. I only have a few seconds before I’m following closely behind.
Her hand slaps against the back window, fingers streaking through the foggy glass as she loses herself in her orgasm. Before it ends, I flip us, her back now pressed against the bench. I continue to pump into her as she rides out the last of the waves, back arched, chanting my name like a prayer only I answer to.
The only name she will ever chant again.
That possessive thought and the feel of her still clamped around me is my undoing. My mouth falls to her neck, biting down on the soft skin as I spill inside of her.
I collapse on top of her, both of us breathless and covered in sweat. She rakes her nails over my spine, causing me to shiver as I soften inside of her. I’m light-headed, weak at the sight of her as I raise my head.
I know I’m crushing her, but she doesn’t seem to care, and I don’t want to move. My face falls to her neck as I breathe her. What have I done in this life to deserve her like this again?
Never has anything felt so fucking perfect.
Being with her again has me feeling whole. Wanted . But I’m also worried. Worried that I’ll get addicted to the taste and touch of her, only for it to be snatched away from me again. I don’t think she’d leave willingly this time, but the intrusive thought still haunts me.
“ I think my legs are broken,” she sighs. “ Maybe next time we won’t be as desperate to fuck.”
The way she says fuck has my cock hardening again. “ I don’t know, because that was something else and I’m already thinking about when I can be inside of you again. Also , say fuck again?” I beg, with a thrust of my hips.
She slaps my chest with a giggle and pushes me off her. We groan when I slide out of her, but the view in front of me has every carnal urge in me rising to the surface. I watch in apt fascination as my cum drips out of her onto dark brown leather under her ass. Knowing I’ve had her raw makes me want to push it back inside her where it belongs, needing to mark her as mine in every way possible.
I shake those thoughts away and pull my eyes away from the temptation between her legs.
“ You better get changed before I’m inside of you sooner than you think,” I warn, but she only finds it funny because she grinds her pussy against the underside of my cock, the feel of the lace rubbing against the sensitive skin has me seeing stars.
“ Johanna ,” I warn.
“ Ugh , fine,” she says. I rise up on my knees as she sits up. She lets out a satisfied sigh, and much to my disappointment, collects her clothes that have been discarded throughout the truck.
We dress in silence, the only evidence left of what we did is our messy hair and the condensation on the windows. Her satisfaction mirrors my own when we share a look across the bench. The moment we just shared together is something I never imagined I would have with her again and I’m already greedy for more.
It’s outrageous that I ever thought I was over Johanna . I’m the biggest fool to think I could fight this, because I’m falling harder than before. I’m gluttonous for her attention, her touch, her smiles. Her love. I look at her, sitting in my truck like it’s where she’s always belonged, the corners of her lips pulled upward toward her still-hazy eyes.
I’ve never been more grateful to fall so hard as I have for her.