Chapter 8
8
FIVE MONTHS AGO
IVY
“Maybe you should cool it on the peppermint daiquiris,” Jill suggests, her attention fixed on me and the four empty glasses on the bar.
My tongue lashes against the back of my teeth as I glower at her. Niko huffs a low laugh a few feet down the bar where he’s serving a customer, and I glare at him, too.
Yeah, I might be on my fourth one in only . . . an hour . . . but the baby loves these fucking things. I’m not about to test my chances with getting kicked in the ribs and the kidneys and the bladder. Pretty much anywhere this girl can reach with her tiny baby legs, she’s beating me up. I’ve gotta be black and blue inside.
“Careful, Jill. She’s like a damn raccoon with those things,” Niko mutters before there’s a plate of fries slid in front of me.
Bradley, the newest hire at the Frosty Mug, scurries off the moment I notice him. He’s freshly eighteen and nervous literally all the time. Niko gives him a hard time, but I think he’s just trying to teach him good habits. His tardiness has disappeared altogether recently.
I make a point of slurping loudly with the pink swirly straw while staring down my boyfriend. The mint swirls around in my mouth and burns at my throat in a good way before warming my belly despite the cold bite of the slush.
“Are you going to name the baby Daiquiri? Maybe Mint? Ooh, what about Swirly Straw?” Jill teases, subtly leaning in to grab my drink.
With my elbow, I shove her away and tuck my drink into my chest. “You don’t steal things from pregnant women.”
“What if I’m doing it for a good cause?”
“My doctor said we’re both in perfect health. I can have as many of these as I want.”
“That’s not completely true, Ivy,” Niko pipes up.
I stare at him, deadpan. “Don’t you have work to do? Why are you eavesdropping on my conversation?”
The man slouched over the bar shifts to lift a brow at me. I blink at him, leaning forward as I stare to silently express how little I care for being gawked at.
Niko snaps his fingers in front of him. It buys him a few points back.
“Don’t look at my woman. Drink your beer,” he orders gruffly.
Jill shakes her fist and hurrahs. “You tell him, Niko.”
Bradley passes me a giant bowl of ketchup and mayo that he’s mixed into a light red consistency the way I love. He eyes Niko curiously, as if trying to read into his every move.
“No, you don’t have to be that possessive over a woman, Bradley. Niko takes it to the extreme sometimes,” I tell him, taking a shot in the dark as to what he’s thinking about. “And not every woman likes a possessive man.”
Jill leaves me alone about my drink choices and dives into this new topic. She leans an elbow to the bar and nods. “Sometimes a girl wants a man to stand up for her and lay a public claim, but other times, she may want to be the one to beat some ass. Differentiating between the two types of women is a learned skill.”
“Sounds complicated,” Brad notes.
Niko wipes the bar with a wet cloth. “It is. You gotta be okay with takin’ a few drinks to the face while learnin’ what kind of guy you want to be. The laid-back type or the makin’ a claim no matter the consequence kind.”
“And how many drinks have you taken? Since you just have all this experience with women,” I jab, the crease between my brows near painful.
The mess of hormones in my body has taken a toll on me, but Niko’s been so damn good about it all. He takes every snap and spout of anger on the chin and holds me while I cry and apologize for it all afterward. I’m so ready to be done with this pregnancy. Nine months is too long. We should be able to press the fast-forward button at any point.
Someone should invent a way to make it happen. And by someone, I mean anyone but me.
I blow out a frustrated breath and slump over the bar. It’s Jill’s hand that rubs up and down my back. Niko’s is far too big to be the one touching me right now.
“If this is what I’m missing with being pregnant, I’m glad that I’m going to be child-free forever,” she says.
Tears well in my eyes, making them burn. My chest caves with a loud sob. “I’m so terrible that I’ve made you never want to have kids?”
“What? No! That’s not what I meant!” She reels backward, abandoning my back.
I look at the distance between us and cry so hard I can’t see through the tears. It’s never-ending. There’s no reason to cry, yet I feel like she just punched me in the tit and ran away, yelling about how horrendous I am. My arms fall to my thighs as sobs rack through me. I keep my head down and eyes squeezed shut as heavy footsteps come my way.
“Oh, don’t turn that glare on me! I didn’t mean to upset her,” Jill argues.
“Still fuckin’ did.”
I spin on my stool and open my arms for Niko before I know he’s even remotely close to me. My huge belly feels like it’s hanging down between my legs as he bends low enough to hug me tight.
“And you can’t even lift me anymore! Everything is wrong,” I sob when he’s forced to hold me at this awkward angle.
He runs his hands through my hair and presses kisses to my cheeks and forehead. Tears spill from my eyes at a terrifying pace. There’s only so many he can wipe away before more come.
“Clarify what you meant, Jill,” Niko demands stiffly, like he’s struggling to rein himself. The next word is said from behind clenched teeth. “Please.”
Jill’s face is visible through the haze of tears when she moves back to how she was sitting before my explosion. “I’ve never wanted kids, Ivy. I made that decision long before we ever met. I’m happy without them. That’s all. I’m not jealous of what you’re going through in the slightest.”
“Niko made me want a million babies,” I blubber.
“A million?” Niko echoes incredulously while Jill snorts a laugh.
I’m being dramatic. I decided months ago that one would be perfect for me and us and made the changes needed to ensure that, but hearing Niko respond like that only strikes at the crumbling ground beneath me. Another wave of tears hits as I shove him away from me and bury my face in my hands.
“Would it be so terrible to have a million babies with me?”
Silence.
The lack of response makes everything worse.
I reach for the blurry shape of my daiquiri glass and toss the straw out before tipping my head back and chugging the rest of the slush. I’m missing the alcohol now more than ever.
There’s a dull pain in my lower stomach when I set the empty glass down. I ignore the fake contraction the way I have over the last few days.
“If I were fifteen years younger, I’d have a million and one babies with you, angel,” Niko murmurs, turning my head with a finger beneath my chin. When I blink my watery eyes at him, he kisses my nose so tenderly I sniffle to avoid another sob. “You know I love you. And I love our life and the baby you’re growin’ for us. I’ll give you everythin’ I can, even if it’s just the three of us.”
“We’re a family of four, Niko,” I whisper. Another jab comes, but it’s between my ribs. The second is stronger, hitting low in my belly.
Niko winces. “Yeah, angel. We’re a family of four. Just a bit broken.”
“We should fix everything. Talk to Travis and make amends.”
“Is that you or the hormones talkin’?”
“It’s me?—”
Jill pokes my elbow, drawing my attention. She slowly looks down at the floor, and both Niko and I follow her gaze. The shine of water confuses me.
“I’m pretty sure it’s the hormones, Ivy. I hope that isn’t pee on the floor,” she says slowly, in disbelief.
Niko stands immediately. When I notice the twin wet patches on the knees of his jeans, I recoil with a gasp.
“I water popped on you!” I howl, scrambling back off the stool.
He reaches for me, but his reflexes are slower than normal. His expression grows blank while his cheeks pale to a pasty white.
My feet ache as I stand in place, palming my belly. It grows tight as a not-so-fake contraction appears. A breath gets stuck in my throat at the pain that follows.
“Niko,” I groan, leaning against his body. “I think we need to go to the hospital. I’m . . . this shit fucking hurts.”
He snaps into action. Still pale, he blinks into focus and bundles me beneath his arm before moving me around the puddle I left on the floor.
Jill trails after us as we move through the bar. “What do you need? Is it baby time? Can I get you anything?”
“Hospital bag is in my truck. Gotta tell Matty in the back before we go,” Niko explains.
Jill touches my arm, smiling softly. “I’ve got Matty and this place. Just go and let me know when I can meet baby Shaw.”
The contraction dies off while I wiggle out from beneath Niko’s arm and tackle my friend in a hug. Her cookie scent is as comforting as her entire friendship has been.
I didn’t know I would grow to find someone like her here in this town, and I’m so happy I did. She’s incredible. I’m proud to call her my friend.
“Love you, Jilly Bean.”
She blows a laugh into my hair. “Did you just come up with that now?”
“Yep. Maybe it’s the whole soon-to-pop-out-a-baby thing I’ve got going for me, but I’m feeling way too wise right now. The name fits you. You’ve got a slightly hard coating but are sugar sweet inside.”
“Well, in that case, I love you back, Ivy,” she says with one last hug.
I scowl. “Just Ivy.”
“For now. I’ll think of something once you’re back and no longer carrying a giant baby in your belly.”
The smile I flash her doesn’t last long. When I hiss and paw at my belly when another contraction rips through me, Jill pulls back and all but pushes me into Niko’s waiting arms.
“Time to go, angel,” he says, his tone tight and tense. Scared .
I’m not scared in the slightest. Nine months of preparing for this, and while I’m not ready at all, I’m more cautiously optimistic and excited than afraid. Even if that doesn’t make sense at all.
My eyes are swollen and red, and I’m sure my cheeks are still stained with tear marks. None of that matters, though.
All that does is bringing our baby girl into this world.