16. Coraline
16
Coraline
Seven years ago
When I wake up, the first thing I notice is the sharp smell of bleach and disinfectant. My whole body feels like it’s been hit by a truck. I’m so tired.
As soon as I open my eyes, I wish I hadn’t. My grandparents and my sister are here with me. They’re all wearing looks of disappointment and worry.
“What happened?” I mutter softly. “How did I get here? How long have I been asleep?”
I look down and notice that there’s an IV in my hand and I’m hooked up to what feels like a hundred monitors. Someone has changed me into a hospital gown and my clothes are nowhere in sight.
“It seems that you passed out in your dorm room and your roommate called an ambulance,” Granna replied. “Sweetheart, we’ve been so worried about you." She stands up and moves her chair so she can be right beside of me. "I knew something was going on after you stopped calling to check in.” She reaches for my hand and places it in hers.
“I’m so sorry,” I say as I start to tear up. Pappy won’t even make eye contact with me. What have I done? I feel so ashamed.
I've always, for the most part, been a rule follower. I never did anything crazy in high school. I was always home on time. I never snuck out. I went to church every Sunday. I was a straight A-B student and never got into any trouble.
I think the break up with Jesse and trying to navigate life on my own has started to lead me down the wrong path. I attended one on campus church event and never returned because I started going to parties with my roommate.
I only started going out because I wanted to make some new friends and my roommate was very persuasive. The first time I ever got drunk was at a party with her and I liked the way it made me feel. Drinking made me forget about Jesse. It made me feel invincible.
There were three soft taps at the door. “Miss Jennings, may I come in? My name is Dr. Jamison.”
“Yes, you can come in.”
Dr. Jamison is a middle aged doctor who looks like he’s the star of a medical TV show. His black hair is pushed back and styled perfectly. He’s wearing navy scrubs and I also notice that he has a gold chain around his neck with a cross on it. He’s holding a clipboard and has a tight expression on his face.
“Miss Jennings, is it okay if we talk about some of the medical tests we ran while you were asleep in front of your family? It’s completely up to you.” He asks as he starts flipping through some of the paper on the clipboard.
How is this guy old enough to be a doctor? He’s so handsome and he smells good. I feel like I'm in a fever dream.
“Yes, of course,” I reply, nonchalantly.
“Miss Jennings, I’m not sure how to say this so I'll just be blunt. Did you know that you’re pregnant?”
My ears start to ring and I start to see black spots everywhere. Everything starts to move in slow motion. The only noise in the room is the alarm going off on one of the monitors.
“Pregnant?!” My Granna gasps and covers her mouth with her hands. She turns to look at me with a sad expression on her face.
Pappy’s face turns as white as a ghost and he’s staring straight down at his feet.
“No sir, there’s no way I’m pregnant. Dr. Jamison, I think you all have made a big mistake.” I start to laugh nervously. I know I have been partying and drinking but I haven’t slept with anyone. I knew that for sure. Didn’t I?
“Maybe the test got mixed up?” I suggest.
Dr. Jamison walks over to one of the monitors and silences the alarm. He looks at me with piercingly blue eyes. “According to your HCG levels in your blood you’re about eight weeks along. There’s no way it got mixed up. They actually ran it twice to be sure.”
My heart drops, eight weeks.
Eight weeks along.
The only person I’ve ever been with is Jesse. I haven’t been with Jesse since we broke up. I start to hyperventilate and I feel a panic attack coming on. What am I going to do?
“I know this is a lot of information to take in at once, but there are lots of options. If you would like to discuss or look into them, I will leave a few packets that have resources on them for you to review.”
He sits the packets of paper down on the bedside table and pats my shoulder. The he gives me a tight, uncomfortable smile and exits the room.
The tension in the room is so thick that I don’t even think a knife could cut it.