Chapter 12
With Christmas Eve and New Year’s Eve both falling on Wednesdays, Cake & Craft Club had taken a three-week break which had been far too long for me.
The last week in particular had dragged and I was so looking forward to being back with my friends today.
Every so often, Cake & Craft Club welcomed guest crafters who taught us a new skill over a week or two.
In late October, we’d had a stained-glass expert in and, as it was close to Halloween, we’d all made a pumpkin.
I’d loved learning about the process and had been really pleased with my creation.
Today we were expecting a willow-weaving expert, showing us how to make bird feeders.
Arriving at Willowdale Village Hall, I was surprised to see Paulette and Saffy at the far end of the room setting up on what was usually the guest’s table. I’d have assumed they were helping out but the items they were unloading from crates and bags definitely weren’t willow rods.
‘Happy New Year, Yvonne!’ Veronica called, joining me by the door.
‘Same to you. I’m guessing we’re not willow weaving today.’
‘No. I had a phone call first thing from our expert. Her father’s had a fall and she’s taken him to hospital so we were a bit stuck, but Paulette’s granddaughter offered to step in and show us her favoured craft. Cup of tea?’
I followed Veronica into the kitchen, exchanging greetings with various members along the way. Milly was in there with Laughlin and it was so good to see them all again.
Tea in hand, I returned to the hall and sat down at my usual table as Veronica called for the group to hush.
‘Happy New Year, everyone! I hope you had a wonderful break. Three weeks without Cake & Craft Club felt very long to me so it’s lovely to be back with you all again.’
She paused for murmurs of agreement and I loved that I wasn’t the only one who’d struggled with so long apart.
‘We’re going to do things slightly differently today,’ Veronica said.
‘You’ll notice there’s no cake out but, don’t panic, cake is coming.
We wanted to launch straight into our guest slot as the craft we’re exploring today requires some thinking time and you might like to do that over cake.
I’ll hand over to Paulette who’ll explain a bit more but, firstly, can you bring your chairs closer so you can see better? ’
When we were all settled, Paulette – looking resplendent in a bold cerise pink-and-orange dress – stood up and smiled round the group.
‘We’re not willow weaving today as originally planned.
Our expert has had a family emergency but my fabulous granddaughter, Saffy, has offered to help out with something she’s passionate about.
She’s a bit nervous as she’s never run a training session before but I’ve assured her that you’re all lovely and, if we hold the cake hostage, you’ll listen intently. ’
Everyone laughed as Paulette handed over to Saffy.
‘Hi, as Grandma said, I’m Saffy and I’m nineteen.
Grandma told me you love trying new crafts so I hope you’ll enjoy today’s session – journalling.
It’s something I used to do a lot a few years back and I could lose myself in it for hours.
Because of that, I had to take a break to focus on my GCSEs and A levels.
I’ve returned to it recently and been reminded not only about how much I love journalling but also how helpful it is.
Grandma and I thought it might be helpful to some of you, especially with it being the New Year. ’
She paused and glanced at Paulette who gave her a reassuring smile and a thumbs up.
‘I wanted to start by telling you what’s been going on with me lately because it’s relevant to the focus of my new journal.
I told my parents over Christmas that I don’t want to go back to university.
My mum thinks I’ve dropped out because I split up with my boyfriend, but Kyle’s only a small part of the problem.
The university wasn’t right for me and neither was my course so why put myself through a whole year of it only to drop out at the end?
I had a few issues when I was younger and it was suggested I keep a diary to make sense of them.
Writing everything down wasn’t for me but a few words, some doodles and a handful of stickers was my vibe.
As I said, I haven’t done any journalling for years but it helped sort my head out back then so I thought I’d give it another go now to help figure out what I want from my life. ’
She picked up a spiralbound book – about the height of A4 but wider.
‘When better to sort your life out than the start of a new year? I’ve asked myself four questions.’ She opened up the journal to reveal the first one:
What 3 things will you STOP doing this year?
‘I picked three because it’s a manageable number and it helps me focus on the most important things to me. More than that can feel overwhelming.’
She turned over several pages to reveal her other questions:
What 3 things will you START doing this year?
Which 3 places will you SEE this year?
Which 3 emotions do you mostly want to FEEL this year?
‘They’re all excellent questions,’ Veronica said. ‘I particularly like that last one.’
‘Me too,’ Milly agreed. ‘I’ve made loads of New Year resolutions but they’re always things like lose weight or get fit. I’ve never thought about how I want to feel.’
‘I like the one about places to see,’ Laughlin said. ‘I like the wording – which places will you see rather than which ones do you want to see? It makes it more definite.’
‘That’s the point,’ Saffy said, nodding.
‘The first three are all positive statements because I see them as things I can control, but the final one about feelings isn’t something I can control quite so easily so I’ve worded it as an aim although, when I achieve the others, those feelings should fall into place. ’
She flicked back the pages to the first question. ‘I’ll show you how I’ve tackled this one. What do you think is the first thing I want to stop doing?’
A washi-tape border showed compasses and maps and the stickers and pictures on the page were a mixture of signposts, stop signs, groups of people and flocks of sheep.
‘You’re going to stop following directions?’ Laughlin muttered. ‘Ignore me. That doesn’t make sense.’
‘You’re closer than you think,’ Saffy said.
‘Why the sheep?’ Milly muttered. ‘Oh! I’ve got it! You’re going to stop following what other people do.’
‘Absolutely that! I ignored my gut and followed Kyle to Birmingham but, even before that, I followed him and all my friends into doing the university thing without questioning whether I even wanted it. This year, I’m going to stop doing things just because my friends are doing them or because it’s what’s expected of me. ’
She showed us another one – a colourful page covered in cosmetics and pictures of hands indicating an intention to stop biting her fingernails – before closing the book. ‘I haven’t done the page for my third stop entry yet so I can’t show you it, but I hope you get the gist.’
She talked us through the various items she favoured for her journalling – washi tape, stickers and ribbon – and where she sourced them.
‘Some people use pictures cut out of magazines, photos, postcards, greetings cards. Some like to put lots of writing in their journals and others don’t use any words. The type of journal, the pens and the materials you use are all completely up to you. Who’s kept a diary before?’
I hadn’t, but the show of hands revealed that I was in the minority.
‘You’re basically doing a diary with added bling.
Have fun with it. You don’t have to use my four questions.
The pink sheets on the table list other New Year-style questions you could use but, if the New Year/new me thing doesn’t appeal, the yellow sheets have other questions and ideas on it.
You could create a journal for your favourite recipes, your gardening plans, your grandchildren, your craft projects.
No rules. Anything goes.’ She took a deep breath. ‘Any questions?’
After Saffy answered a few questions from the group, Veronica joined her at the front and led us in a round of applause.
‘Some of you will want to dive straight in,’ Veronica said, ‘but others will prefer that thinking time I mentioned. There’s notepads here if you want to scribble down your thoughts first and a pile of journals if you want to dive straight in.’
Saffy nodded. ‘Writing it down first is a great idea, but I’d say don’t spend too long thinking. Scribble down the first thing your gut tells you. You can always perfect the wording later.’
Feeling in awe of how wise and confident Saffy came across, especially for her age, I looked at the information on the two coloured sheets of paper.
I was mostly drawn towards the same four questions Saffy was using so I grabbed a notepad and wrote each one down at the top of a fresh page, adding the numbers one to three down the sides.
What did I want to stop doing this year? I stared at the page for several minutes, thoughts swirling around my head, and even scribbled down a couple of ideas, inspired by Saffy’s entry to stop biting her nails:
What 3 things will you STOP doing this year?
Ironing everything
Displaying the tins label out
Tutting to myself, I scribbled out both entries.
Milly was on the table next to me. ‘Changed your mind?’ she asked.
‘I’ve gone with the questions Saffy suggested, starting with the things I want to stop but what I’ve written down is rubbish – things I’m really not bothered about stopping.’
‘I like Saffy’s questions too,’ Milly said, ‘but I need a lot more thinking time and I need quiet so I’m not going to push it this afternoon. I’m going to write the questions in my journal and decorate them. You could do the same if you’re struggling. Ooh! The cakes are out.’