Chapter 2
Alijah Khali Dawson
Damn, what the hell am I about to put on? This is a regular family event, so why am I overthinking my attire? Low groans force me out of the closet as I stare at the toffee-toned woman lying in bed, gripping her stomach with a grimace on her beautiful face.
“Man, this is why I need to stay here with you. You’re clearly in more duress than you led on.”
“Oh, stop. It’s just PMS. It’s not anything worth you missing out on spending time with your family. I’ll be here when you get home.”
I shake my head and walk toward the bed, where I drop to my hunches before my hand automatically strokes Monika’s cheek.
Monika Scott is the love of my life, and she has been for the past four years.
She and I met at my previous employer during new-hire orientation and somehow clicked.
She’s the woman I see myself committing to for life, and the one my mother adores.
“PMS or not, if you’re in pain, I should stay with you. I can run you a warm bath and then massage you once you get out. Hell, I can feed you some of that nasty ass chocolate peanut butter ice cream you like during this time.”
My face wrinkles as I stare at Monika, and I frown at the thought of deserting her in her time of need.
Going to a cookout when Monika isn’t feeling well doesn’t sound appealing to me.
I have been raised to cater and care for the woman who holds my heart.
But Monika won’t let me. According to her, it’s nothing serious, but to me it’s no different than if she had pneumonia.
I stand for a second before I lean and kiss Monika.
It’s something light, but a kiss that makes my pulse race and my heart beat faster.
“I love you, bae. Leaving you is about to break my fucking heart. Let me stay with you.” My voice is pleading and soft as I stare into Monika’s bright brown eyes.
Monika connects our lips again, and it feels like she’s only trying to pacify me when she speaks again.
“No need. I’m a big girl and don’t need you to hold or coddle me. This happens every month.”
I grumble before I express the only rebuttal I have in my arsenal at the moment.
“Yeah, but this is the first month that you and I are under the same roof.”
Monika and I moved in together a month ago, after her lease expired. Since our relationship hasn’t shown any signs of ending, this is just the next step in progressing our future.
“Then you should understand that there will be many crampy months in our future. Go to the cookout. I’ll be in this same spot when you get back.”
I caress Monika’s cheek again as I communicate my adoration for her through my eyes. After a minute, I nod subtly, despite the tinge of pain in my chest. It takes me less than ten minutes to settle on a pair of jeans, a black tee, black socks, and a pair of slides.
“Do you need anything before I bounce?”
Monika smirks and shakes her head before answering.
“No. I’ll be okay.”
“Fine. But text me if you need anything.”
“Will do. Tell your mom I said hi.”
I nod before I plant a quick kiss and back out of our bedroom.
My stomach knots with each step I take away from her.
Monika isn’t my first serious relationship, but she is the first woman to win my heart.
Never have I ever fallen in love with a woman.
I think my love came easy once I saw Monika effortlessly interacting with my parents and siblings.
They love her just as much as I do. My phone rings as I descend the steps toward my ride, and I pick up the pace because I already know it's Ma checking to see where we are.
The minute I’m in my vehicle, I retrieve my phone and smirk when I see the missed call from Ma. I hit the button and pull out of my spot as the phone rings around the interior.
“Where are you at, boy? Everyone is here but you. You know Tiny’s fat ass will inhale your father’s ribs without caring who has eaten. I swear that girl needs to find something other than food to enjoy.”
“I’m on my way, Ma.” If I hadn’t cut off Ma’s rant about my cousin, she would have beaten my ears for the entire drive to her house.
“I’ll see if I can body check Tiny’s hungry ass until you get here.”
I laugh hard when the call ends because my cousin always seems to get under Ma’s skin when there’s a get-together.
The drive to my parents’ is uneventful, and traffic is nonexistent, so it takes me fifteen minutes to arrive.
As soon as I’m out of the vehicle, I hear music blasting from the backyard.
Before I head that way, I send a quick message to check on Monika.
Me: Hey, bae. You still good?
“Yo, bring your ass, big bro. Ma has been bitching for thirty minutes because her golden son ain’t gotten here yet.” My brother Aaron’s voice makes me chuckle, and I drop my phone into my pocket without waiting for Monika’s reply.
“Don’t be a hater all your life, little nigga,” I say before I make my way toward my little brother.
Once we’re an inch apart, I pull him into my body for a one-arm hug.
Having younger siblings used to make my ass itch when we were kids.
But now, I can appreciate the bond between my brother and sister, although Aaron and I interact more than I do with our sister Gianna.
Gianna doesn’t communicate with me much, but I blame that on the fact that she hated how our parents used to assign me to babysitting and keeping up with her.
Ma used to call her a fast tail heffa who needed a strong arm because she wasn’t about to be raising any grandkids.
“Hear ye, hear ye, the tardy nigga who’s the apple of Ma’s eyes has finally shown up. Give it up for Alijah ever tardy Dawson.” Aaron’s words trail off as he runs away when I flinch at him, ready to punch his aggy ass.
Ma’s eyes momentarily meet mine before she returns to focusing on Tiny, who’s at the food table.
I chuckle and shake my head before I move toward the grill Pops stands behind on the back deck.
Kids run around happy to be with their cousins.
I nod at various family members who sit around the yard either eating, mingling, or dancing.
I momentarily stare at the table where a few of my aunts and uncles are as they hover over what looks to be a Jenga game.
I can feel the intensity from where I am.
Jenga for my family is like spades to other families. One wrong pull and my aunts and uncles will temporarily forget their lineage as they shamelessly threaten one another.
“I ain’t stepping in when that shit goes bad this time. I told them old niggas not to bring out that damn game. But they all claimed to play fair and nice,” Pops says as I disconnect my gaze and climb the steps of the patio.
“Now you and I both know their asses lied with the first word about playing.” I chuckle as I take in the man who has always given me an example to mimic.
Darren Dawson is that nigga. He’s the man who has taught me how to be an upstanding citizen in every way that matters.
Darren is the reason I went from high school to college with plans for some type of financial security, although he teases me about missing a part of his instruction since all I do is sit on my ass all day.
My response is to show him my hefty bank account.
I’m a remote data analyst, and I get paid great money to sit on my ass as Pops claims.
“It’s good to see you, Son. But I almost sent a search party for your ass. You know your mama likes everyone to arrive at the same time.”
I laugh at that comment because Gwen Dawson runs a tight ship. She likes her events to start and end on time. I can only imagine how much she complained to Pops about me being tardy. My eyes disconnect from Pops as they bounce around the yard before I speak.
“I don’t see Gigi. How did she escape Ma’s wrath and constant calls?”
“I’m right here.” My sister Gianna steps outside, effectively ending my attempt at disputing being the only person not in attendance.
All I can do is nod slowly as Pops snickers, and I pull Gianna into my arms. I kiss the top of her head as she runs her hands up and down my back.
I release Gianna and then mingle with my family.
Even though my body is physically with my family, my mind is back at the apartment with Monika.
I only last forty-five minutes before my thoughts and guilt refuse to release me, and I sneak out of the backyard without being detected.
Fifteen minutes later, I’m back at the crib and climbing the stairs to our third-floor apartment.
My brows hike and forehead wrinkles when I enter the living room as R&B flows at a tempo that will prevent me from being heard by Monika.
The hairs on my arms stand at attention as apprehension rises from my toes, slowly up my body.
When a whimper sounds from the direction of our bedroom, I walk that way.
My steps are unhurried as my heart drums in my ears with every second it takes to reach the room.
The door isn’t closed, and my steps halt as my eyes balloon like one of the characters in an acme scene.
I thought she was sick. What happened to all the pain she was in before you left?
“What the fuck?” Those three words tumble from my lips without preamble as I take in the sight of my woman in a threesome.
The act is damaging, no matter what, but shock surges through my body upon seeing two other sets of titties.
Monika is between the legs of one woman as another woman hovers over that woman’s mouth with her head thrown back and her eyes closed.
It takes the three women a second to feel or sense the shift of sexual energy in the room.
But when their eyes land on me, no one stops what they’re doing.
I mean no fucking one. Monika slurps the woman’s pussy with her lust-filled eyes on me, and I glare at her.
“What the fuck are you doing?” My question is rhetorical, but my fucking brain spins as I fight to process what I see.
The love of my life. The woman who has my heart in a vice grip. The woman my family adores. The woman who’s currently cheating on me with two other gotdamn women.
“Alijah.” Monika must take my silence and stares as something like temptation as she purrs my name around a mouth full of pussy.
Our future goes up in black smoke instantly as I back into the nearest wall, unable to slow the betrayal that wraps in an anaconda-like grip. My chambers in my heart splinter the longer I’m unable to move or disconnect my gaze from the scene in front of me.
“I’ve been waiting for you, ba—mm—join us,” Monika purrs, and something within me snaps.
“You’ve got me fucked up.” I stand to my full height and march to the closet and snatch my clothes from the hangers.
Heat fuels my actions as my mind tortures me with a constant loop of Monika and her women.
With each garment that hits the ground, my thoughts swirl.
None of the women stop or pause their actions when they realize my presence, which tells me this isn’t their first rodeo.
That thought boils my blood as the desire to punch something slowly enters my mind.
“I’ve gotta get the fuck out of here,” I grumble.
“Don’t go, Alijah.” Monika’s voice makes me growl in an inhumane way as I continue removing my clothes.
The words I want to release will only cause me to spiral and potentially land in jail, so I say nothing.
It takes me ten minutes to remove my stuff from the closet and another ten to toss everything in trash bags.
I do all of this while Monika tries to talk to me with the women still engaging in oral sex like nothing is amiss.
“Baby, please don’t go. I want us to be together,” Monika says after she walks in my path, temporarily halting my progress toward the door.
A gut-pulling yet painful round of laughter escapes my mouth when Monika motions between me, the women on the bed, and herself.
“You must have inhaled more than pussy before I got here.” I step around Monika as I remember my home training and my desire to be a man in every aspect of my life.
When the front door slams behind me, the first tear slides down my cheek. Every step I take toward my vehicle brings more water, and my stomach clenches and releases when I enter the driver's seat. I send a message to the one person who can handle me in my current state.
Me: Aye, you at the crib.
Dre: Yep.
Me: Bet. I’m on my way.
Dre: Say less.
Dre’Lon Stanley has been my best friend since our days in the sandbox.
We have been through some shit over the years, and nothing has been able to come between the bond we’ve created.
He’s my brother from another mother. I angrily swipe my face clean of the evidence of the deception I witnessed and head toward Dre’s crib.
The brain is a powerful muscle as I suffer through the repeat of Monika’s actions the entire drive.
My wayward thoughts cause me to eat up the distance, and before long, I pull into my boy’s driveway.
My chest rises and falls like I’ve run a marathon, which forces me to try to get myself together before I leave my ride.
Hard knocks on my window cause my head to shift faster than necessary, only to see Dre standing outside my door.
I exhale and exit the vehicle, my heart on my sleeve.
“Damn. Do I need to load the Beretta or help you hide the body, bro?”
“We’ll see after I’m too numb to make rational decisions. What you got stocked in the bar?”
“Aw, shit. Come on. This sounds heavy.”
Dre throws his arm around my shoulder before he leads me inside his crib and down to his mancave. It takes me no time to run down the situation I walked in on.
“I know you’re fucking lying.” A feminine squeal causes me to lift my head from the glass I’m holding in a tight grip.
Dre’s wife, Queen, stands at the threshold of the man cave with a look that would kill anything moving in her direction.
“Uh, let me handle this, Boobie,” Dre says with a smirk as Queen rolls her eyes and leaves the doorway.
Thanks to the emptiness of my stomach from not eating at the cookout, the liquor is already taking full effect in my system.
Or it could be the fact that I have downed three full tumblers of dark liquor since being here.
Either way, numbness makes my chest feel a little lighter.
In another world, I might have been able to appreciate the opportunity to fuck three women.
But in the world where my bitch ass heart is broken, all I can feel is pain and betrayal. How is this my fucking life?