Chapter 35
AFresh Start
Zahirah
“Come on, baby. You know that was funny. I had the hardest time of my life trying not to laugh,” Bentley croons.
“Okay, okay, you’re not wrong, but you’re not going to do my buddy like that.”
My laughter fills the air as Bentley and I ride in his new sports car. We’re on our way to another date. This is our fifth date in the last two weeks.
“Eddy is a big boy; he can handle a little teasing. I’m still trying to figure out what he was thinking. Mom has always been sharp,” he says through his own laughter.
“He wasn’t thinking. I mean, come on. How much did you think things through when you were his age, wanting to impress the girls?”
He gives a small chuckle. “You were the only girl I was trying to impress, Zah. Remember? I had to think before I did everything.”
We’ve been to see a counselor, and we do a lot of talking and even journaling together. Bentley wants me to see he’s a changed man. He’s doing an amazing job.
I’ve seen it not only in his words but also in his actions. He’s an amazing father and a better boyfriend than I remember. It’s hard not to fall in love with him all over again.
I find myself smiling and laughing a lot these days. He reaches over and places his hand on my thigh. I look at the side of his face and smile, reaching to run my hand through his hair. He still keeps it long, the longest length reaching just past his shoulders.
Erica has been calling him John Wick. I’ve gotten a kick out of that. Yeah, Bentley’s haircut does come close, but that’s about it.
The one thing that has changed, which I noticed in Vegas two years ago, Bentley’s body is, hands down, crazy in shape. I mean, straight insane since college.
I thought he was fit back then. It is so different now. He has that grown-ass man weight and muscle. He carries it all so well too.
He’s also become a beast in the sheets. I have zero complaints there. Not that he hasn’t always been amazing in bed.
My nights are filled with more orgasms than I can count. Waking to him and going to bed in his arms at night has been heaven. Our connection has become deeper than it has ever been.
“Were you really going to kiss me that one time?”
“You mean the summer before I left for college?”
“Yeah,” I say with a smile.
“I was. I know I shouldn’t have, but I was. If not for that call, I would have.”
“Do you regret the time we lost?”
The car falls silent. I bite my lip, wondering if this is when he’ll shutdown on me. He gives my thigh a gentle squeeze.
“Every day, but living in my regrets only robs us of our now. Can I ask you something?”
“Yes.”
“Are you happy now?”
“Yes, very.”
“Good. Do you think we’re moving forward?”
“It feels like it. Aaron loves having you around.”
“I’ll always be here for my son, but I don’t want you to take that as an obligation to have to stay with me.”
I sit and think his words over. Do I think I have to stay with him for my son? No, I want Aaron to have his father in his life, but I don’t need to have Bentley in my life for that to happen.
“I don’t feel obligated. Yes, I want Aaron to have a whole family. However, I don’t want him to grow up in a family that’s broken from within.
“I feel like we’re in a good place. We’re already moving forward. I believe if we continue on this path, we’ll get to what we’ve always wanted,” I reply.
“Then I’m right where I’m supposed to be, Zahirah. Not a step out of place. This is our fresh start.”
I smile and settle in my seat. That was a great answer. I feel the same way.
We fall into a light banter for the rest of the ride. When we pull up to the Japanese Friendship Garden, I get excited. I’ve heard so much about this place, but I’ve never been. Bentley asked if I had and when I said no, he got to planning.
I can’t wait to see what all he has planned. It’s early evening. The sun hasn’t set yet, but it will soon.
Bentley takes my hand and leads me inside. Once we are walking in the garden, it oddly seems like not many others are around. I look up at Bentley curiously, but he only smiles back at me.
I shrug it off and go with the flow. The place is so tranquil and romantic. The sound of the flowing ponds and Bentley’s rumbling voice brings a sense of ease and peace.
“I have something for you,” he murmurs in the middle of our conversation when we come to a little area with rocks that look like we can perch on the edge of them.
I take a seat, and he sits beside me. I look at him expectantly, wondering what he’s up to. He pulls a gift-wrapped box from his pocket and places it into my hand.
“What’s this?”
“Open it. I want to see the surprise on your face,” he replies.
“Okay, let’s see,” I sing.
Tearing the paper away excitedly, I hold my breath with anticipation. I reveal a jewelry box and open the lid. I tear up as I find a new charm for my necklace. It’s a tiny baby shoe with Aaron’s birthstone in it.
“Oh, wow. This is adorable,” I coo.
“I thought it was fitting for your next charm. Although I might need to get you a matching bracelet for all the charms you’ll need for those six kids you promised me,” he says while clearly trying to stifle a laugh.
“Bullshit,” I gasp out, causing him to lose his battle with his laughter.
“You can’t renege now. We already started.”
“Bent, I’m willing to have three more, tops. I’m not having five more babies.”
He presses his lips to mine and kisses me firmly. “I just wanted to get you to agree to have more with me,” he says against my lips.
“All you had to do was ask. You have a better shot asking than trying to make me commit bodily harm,” I tease.
“Good to know. We’ll have that talk soon. Come, dinner is waiting.”
“You rented the place out, didn’t you?”
He shrugs his shoulders. “I might have.”
I smile and hand him my new charm. “Will you put it on for me first?”
He takes it and hooks it on the chain for me, then pecks my lips. Not only do I feel loved, but I can also see it in his eyes. This date moves to the top of my fave list.
Bentley
We walk into the house hand in hand. Aaron is fast asleep on my shoulder. We stopped to pick him up from my mom’s when we got back.
That date was amazing. Anytime I get with Zah is more than I can ask for. The look in her eyes when I gave her that charm was worth a million dollars.
Something so simple means so much to her. I think that’s what I love about her so much. Zahirah isn’t afraid to laugh at herself or to dance in the rain.
It makes me want to give her the world. Something I plan to give her and my son. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for these two.
“I’ll put him to bed. You want to go take a bath? I’ll join you in a bit.”
“No, I’ll help. We’ve been gone all day. I missed him.”
I nod and squeeze her fingers. We make our way to Aaron’s room and Zah gets his PJs as I get him undressed and use the baby wipes to wipe him down.
When I’m done and go to throw out the wipes, Zah gets him into his pajamas. My boy is knocked out. He looks like a sleeping angel.
“He sleeps just like you.”
I scoff. “I wish I could sleep that hard. The kid would sleep through a tornado.”
“Bent, when you fall out, your ass is out for the count. You sleep like the dead.”
I bury my face in her neck and laugh. I do tend to sleep hard. Inhaling deeply, I count my blessings.
“I’m not ready to be out for the count tonight. Come dance with me.”
“Dance with you?”
“Yeah, like we used to do in college after we got our grades back. Come on, it will be fun. The perfect ending to the perfect day.”
“Okay, let’s go.”
We both kiss our boy good night and head out to the living room. I pull my phone out and find a song that speaks to how I’m feeling. “So Easy” by Olivia Dean fills the room.
I tug Zah into my embrace and begin to sway with her in my arms. She reaches up and cups my face as we lock eyes. In this moment, I see my past, present, and future all rolled into one.
It’s not pretty. In fact, it’s pretty damn ugly in some parts. However, it’s mine.
“I love you,” we say at the same time.
We start to laugh. I tug her into me and capture her lips. I kiss her hungrily.
“Is a year and nine months enough time between babies? I’m asking for a friend.”
“I have a bet for you. If you win the championship this season, I’ll allow you to get me pregnant again. Deal?”
“Oh, baby, you have a deal. I’ll even throw the game-winning touchdown for you and Aaron,” I say as I rub her back.
“Okay, Bentley. Okay.”