Chapter 22
Chapter Twenty-Two
ADDY
I ’d be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous. Actually, that is also a lie. I’m more than nervous—I’m anxious, kind of terrified, to be honest. After a few long hours in the truck, pulling the goosenecks, we are gathered at the base of the mountains. The ones that I wondered at from the hill by the vista. They looked so majestic from there. Now, looming above me and capped in snow, they are plain intimidating.
Sergeant moves under me, chewing at the bit. At least he’s not chomping it. I have a horse loaded with supplies tied up beside Sergeant. I am to tail behind and go where needed over the next seven days of this roundup. And the air is cold.
Hudson says it is colder in the mountains where we are heading. Great. Potential frostbite and fear—what more could a girl want in her career? So, I am bundled up with a parka, Wranglers, long boots, and thick socks that are under my jeans, and three layers under the coat and gloves. Dry ones in my small, condensed pack on the back of my literal packhorse. It’s a surreal feeling. I feel like I’m in the middle of a Yellowstone episode.
Hudson assembles the crew of ten riders. Harry, Reed, and Mackinlay are amongst them. Six of the men I have seen around town but don’t know. Louisa will be coming in five days’ time, in the truck, bringing food and keeping up with our progress every few days. Being so remote, it is smart to have her drop in. She has a satellite phone and first aid supplies.
“Right!” Hudson says. Rocket is a live wire on his feet, anticipating what happens next. He is literally chomping at the bit. Hudson sits steady in the saddle. “We split up. Covering the most northern, western, and eastern boundaries of the ranch. Nothing beyond the river on the other side. Harry takes the northern end. Mackinlay and Reed, the eastern. I will take the western boundary. Two men with each party. In two days, we herd them to the ridge, and push them down the mountain. Back here in five days for a rest, then push them home. Any issues that need attending to, we deal with then. Search every pocket, every valley and peak. The estimated head count for this roundup is around a thousand. I want no beast left behind. Any questions?”
None.
They have done this every year for who knows how long. The men mutter and split between Harry’s party, Mack and Reed’s, and ours. Hudson shifts the reins against Rocket’s neck and sidesteps closer to where I sit on Sergeant. “You okay, Addy?”
“Yup. Keen to start.” The words are forced, and Hudson gives me a knowing look. I’m a trillion percent happy that he didn’t assign me to another party. The two men who are riding with us say polite hellos and dip their hats.
“Hi,” I offer back.
“Right. Be safe, make sure you don’t leave any stragglers. We will catch you all in five days.” Hudson tilts his chin toward the mountain.
Actual yeehaws crow as most of the men push their horses into a lope and head for the ascent of the mountain in front of us, each one of them with a bedroll and supplies tied to the back of their saddle. A lariat hanging from the side of each man’s saddle. And Mack, Harry, and Hudson all have a rifle slung over their backs. I don’t even want to think about what that’s for.
I can imagine Reed loving this wild adventure. He stands in the stirrups as he and Mack gallop toward the thick mountain forest. The two men with Hudson and me eye the mountain like they want to gallop off into the wilds like the other two parties did. But with a glance from Hudson, they mill about on their excitable horses.
“Addy, this is Ned and Mick. Mick, Ned, this is Dr. Howard. The vet.”
“Please, call me Addy.”
“Addy,” Ned says dipping his hat. He is grey-haired, possibly a little older than Harry.
“Howdy,” Mick mutters, not meeting my gaze.
Awesome. At least Ned seems nice.
“Let’s go!” Hudson exclaims. He takes off at a steady canter toward the western rise. The two men burst off the spot after him. Squeezing Sergeant into a lope, I cluck my tongue and the packhorse, Mira, follows along. I’m assuming our time will be a little slower since I have two horses to wrangle.
I don’t want to be left behind or let them slip out of sight, so I push Sergeant a little faster. The cool breeze whips past my cheeks and they burn. I suck in deep, satisfying breaths. This right here is freedom. It’s priceless. And for a second, I understand with deep, guttural instinct why this is the life cowboys choose.
The moment the frosty mountain forest swallows Sergeant, Mira, and me, a shudder snakes through my body. The men are already ahead a little way. Hudson yells something to Ned. Rocket sinks on his haunches and spins back. His mane follows, slapping his neck as he springs into a canter and heads for me.
The pure bliss over Huddy’s face takes my breath away. This is him. Raw. The heart of who he is. And he is spectacular. His white hat, navy jacket lined with cream fur, Wranglers, boots, spurs, and the biggest grin wrapped on his sweet face I have ever witnessed.
He is literally lit up.
And my heart almost explodes at the sight of him. When he reaches my side, he lopes around us and comes up beside me.
“This is something else, Huddy.”
“My favorite week of the entire year.”
“I bet it is. Have you seen your face?” I laugh, and he throws his head back with a hearty laugh that rattles right through me.
“We can’t really slow down. Can you ride along with us?”
“Oh, when Harry said trail behind, he actually meant keep up?”
“Don’t take my father’s words literal. You ride beside me, Addy, never behind.”
I roll my eyes at him. But he stares at me. He actually means it. And I try not to overthink the meaning of that. After all, it’s only a few short weeks and I will be back in the city. And this stunning place and this incredible man will still be here. That closes my throat up real quick.
I scan the spaces between the trees. Snow is dusted over everything. It’s so stunning. Like no place I have ever been before. Then again, when I look into Hudson’s eyes, I see that there, too.
“Hup,” I rasp to Sergeant, leaning forward. He takes off up the ascent. Mira follows close behind. We lope between the trees. Hudson and Rocket catch up, and he grins at me. God that face—happiness personified. He rubs his jaw and tracks his focus ahead again, his Adam’s apple bobbing as if something stole his breath. And I’m sure I know what it was. Because it’s the same thing that stole mine.
Something so big that it has both of us enthralled. Captivated. Unwilling to break away.
Something that makes my chest swell and my heart ache.
After almost an entire day of riding, we are only halfway up the side of this ancient mountain. And the sun is dazzling us with its light, piercing the snow as it sinks further and further. The three men are building the tents. We have found a total of twenty head so far. They are corralled in a makeshift yard between trees with the fallen dead wood that lays around under the snow. I tend to the five horses.
They are tired, and I make sure they all drink and eat some grains to hold them through the night. It’s going to be cold. I bundle them up the best I can with the few blankets I could fit onto Mira. I hope the others are doing as well as we are so far.
“How are our trusty steeds coming along, Doc?” Hudson says behind me. The lilt in his voice makes me smile.
I turn back. “They’re okay. Tired. Like their riders.”
“We’re only getting started. Come on, Ned got the fire going, the pot on.”
“Great, I’m frozen through.” I rub my hands together, clouds curling from my mouth with every word I say. Goddamn, it is cold. “Can I ask why you do this roundup in these conditions? Why not wait until spring, at least?”
“We work to the seasons and the calving season of the cattle. Spring is calving season. Trying to herd calving cows never ends well for anyone, ‘specially up here.”
“Oh, how?”
“You ever tried gettin’ between a cow and her calf in the open? Cowboys come out worse off. Plus, we would prefer the wolves not take a quarter of the calves before we can wrangle them down off the mountain.”
“I didn’t think of it like that. Makes sense.”
“Plus, when it’s cold it’s easier on the horses. We ride hard. And... It gives us an excuse to snuggle up.”
“Who did you snuggle up with last year?” I feign a shocked look and he laughs.
“Definitely not Morley. This is the first year that I won’t have to freeze.” The smile that cracks his square jaw lights up his blue eyes.
“Is that why Mick is in a bad mood? Ned wanted to be big spoon?” I can’t keep the grin from my mouth. And then instantly I regret my words, thinking Mick will hear me.
Hudson cracks up, his laughter echoing through the trees. “You should probably keep that theory to yourself unless you want some type of wildlife ending up in your tent, Addy.”
“Oh shit! God, I hope he didn’t hear me.”
We make our way to the fire, and three tents are set up close by. The aroma of fresh coffee and something that smells like stew wafts around the frigid air of the camp.
Ned rolls over a stump, dusts off the snow, and pats it, gesturing for me to sit. “Thanks, Ned.”
It’s hard and cold, but the fire is warm and delicious.
“New York, hey, missy?” he says.
“Yup. Lewistown, hey?”
He chuckles. “Born and raised, sweetheart.”
Mick grunts, shoving the end of a long stick into the fire. Embers fly up into the air, fizzling out as they touch the snowy canopy above us. “Didn’t do you much good, either.”
“Speak for yourself,” Ned says, pointing a finger.
“You’re not from here, Mick?” I try to break the ice with him.
“Sort of.”
“Mick’s a man of few words, Miss Howard. He’ll warm up to you, about ten minutes out from home, in about a week, I reckon.” Ned tosses a twig at the other man. He swats it away and gives him a scowl.
“That’s okay; so was Hudson, once. And please, call me Addy.”
“This one?” Ned shakes his head. “Never shut up as a kid. Now he’s a chip off the old block.”
Hudson meets the old man’s gaze. “Easy, Ned, you say it like it’s a bad thing. Harry might hear you.”
“That old bastard clues onto everything. You’re probably right. If there’s one man who can read people like nobody else, it’s your old man. Knows what most people need before they do.”
I stare at Hudson, and his eyes find mine as his jaw feathers. I mull the words over in my mind and pull back the memory of the day I met him. The glance between us that Harry took. His insistence that his son help me back onto a horse. The mandatory ride-along-vet gig. Was Harry reading me or Hudson—or both? Or was it the way Charlie responded to me, like he hasn’t to anyone else except his master?
Hudson is still staring. Is he only now figuring this out, too? Harry knew Hudson wouldn’t deny him the request to make the vet ‘roundup ready.’ It was an easy play. It’s like all the pieces of the puzzle were sitting on the table, and Harry was the one to connect them together.
Oh shit.
He may have read both of us right, but the timing, the situation is wrong. I’m not staying. My contract ends. And I can’t throw away my career and be penniless. I shake my head, breathing faster.
“You okay, missy?” Ned asks, resting his hand on my arm. Hudson is staring into the fire, his throat working up a storm.
I stand and turn to Ned. “I’m sorry, I’m going to go to bed.”
He simply tips his hat, eyes searching mine, as if reading what I’ve figured out. Something like regret and hurt, fueled by the embers of desperation, wraps around my heart and tightens its surly grip.
After a while, the tent flap moves. I pretend to be asleep. But it’s too early, and any fatigue I was feeling a moment ago is washed away by the thoughts galloping through my head. Thoughts about Hudson, me, and my veterinary career. Harry’s goddamn stinking intuition.
Hudson sits on the end of the blankets and takes off his boots and hat before lying next to me. But he doesn’t touch me, only lacing his hands behind his head and staring at the peaked top of the cream tent.
“Addy, about what Ned was talking about?—”
“It’s fine. You know what, Harry was right. And that’s the part that scares me the most.”
“I can see that. Harry can be scary.”
“Your father isn’t scary, Hudson; he’s direct, smart, and loyal. Like his oldest son.”
“Yeah, well . . .”
“I—”
“Tell me, Adeline.”
“Tell you what?”
I don’t dare look at him or roll over to face him. My heart hammers in my chest. I have no idea what he wants me to say. I hold my breath.
“Tell me your plans for your veterinary career. What are your dreams? You must have them. I know you well enough now to know you would have a plan and a backup plan.”
A soft smile blooms over his face, but it never reaches his eyes. I blow out the breath. I can’t be anything but honest with this man. “After my internship, the plan was to take six-to-twenty-four-month contracts in various equine clinics and sectors and grow my experience. One day, I was hoping to have my own clinic. But the backup plan was always returning to the clinic outside New York. Some of my friends are there. My parents still live there. And Joe, he was such an amazing mentor. Possibly had a lot to do with him being my dad’s best friend. But still, I was happy there.”
“And now? Are you happy now?”
Now I roll over and face him. I trace a finger over his jaw and push up a wobbly smile. “Right now, I am.”
He nods and closes his eyes.
“Hudson?”
“Yeah.”
“It’s kind of early for bed . . .”
He smiles and cracks one eye open. “What did you have in mind?”
I push up on one elbow and kiss the side of his mouth and cup his jaw with my free hand. He rolls quickly and pulls me over him. I stifle a squeak, and he chuckles. “You are going to have to be really, really quiet.”
“With you? Never, Hudson Rawlins.”
“Addy—” His breath hitches and something like grief flashes through his eyes. “I’m not going to make you choose between me and your dreams, sweet girl.”
He pulls me down to him and claims my mouth, the weight of what he said not getting a chance to sink in before the words fly from my head. The cold that has sunk into my bones from a day of riding through the snow melts.
God, the things you do to me, Huddy.