Chapter Eight
The sound of rolling wheels followed Crisp to his bedroom.
When he came through the door, dragging his suitcase behind him, he was more than a little surprised by the craziness that greeted him.
The place was a mess. Jett was asleep at the kitchen table, looking exactly as he had in the picture Jay sent.
Jay was passed out on the couch. No one budged.
Crisp snickered as he left the suitcase parked by the door and moved to stand over Jay.
Crisp shook his head and got a blanket to cover him.
After he took care of Jay, Crisp tossed a throw blanket over Jett as well.
Crisp moved around the room, putting his things away.
When finished with that, Crisp made his way to the bathroom to shower.
He had overslept this morning and had to run out without one.
Crisp couldn’t stand that. He felt gross.
Being poor and dirty at one time in his life had him feeling some such way about ever being unwashed.
Crisp got clean and then spaced out. There was just something about weddings.
Crisp hadn’t felt quite the same after watching Tracker and Zeus celebrating their happiness.
It was nice, but Crisp still always had an invisible weight sitting on his chest. His every secret and every lie held him hostage.
Did Jay feel like a prisoner here? The more he thought about it, the faster his heart raced.
Jay stepped inside the wet room, nude and gorgeous. He looked like a man ready to fuck.
Crisp couldn’t take it. “Do you have Stockholm syndrome?”
Jay blinked and then roared with laughter.
Crisp didn’t.
Jay immediately sobered. He crowded Crisp’s space. “Am I being kept here against my will?”
“Sort of. I mean, we don’t have a normal life. We can’t come and go, openly doing whatever we please. Am I stealing your life?”
Jay kissed his forehead. “Did you notice how many times you said we? That’s because we’re in this together. The keyword being together. Plus, not only am I not here against my will, Jett and I went out last night.”
Crisp’s stomach tried crawling into his throat. “What? Why? Where?” He deflated. Crisp swiped his hands through the air. “Never mind. I’m just proving my own point.” He focused on Jay and took a deep breath. “Did you have fun?”
His smile was breathtaking. Crisp almost sighed. “I did. Jett likely can’t say the same. He lost a bet to me and had to go out in public with me the way I sent you in the picture last night.”
Crisp chortled. “You’re joking.”
Even though his words hadn’t been a question, Jay treated them as if they were.
“No.” He took a ring off his only little finger.
Crisp hadn’t noticed the gorgeous gold piece until then.
“At every jewelry store we visited, they kept asking him questions—as if he were my spouse-to-be and would want something he chose. It was hilarious.”
Crisp heard nothing after seeing the ring.
Jay kept going as if Crisp could still breathe properly. “Jett is nice and all, but no one else is you. Anyhow,” he dropped to one knee and held the ring out like water didn’t pound his face. “Will you marry me?”
Crisp’s jaw dropped. He had always thought that reaction was just a saying, but no. He was shocked speechless.
“Do you enjoy watching me drown?” Jay’s question shook Crisp from his mental lockdown.
“No.”
“Oh.” Jay stood, looking everywhere but at Crisp. “I guess I—”
Horror struck Crisp. “I wasn’t saying no to the proposal. You asked if I like to see you drown and I said no. Otherwise, it’s a huge yes. I’d love to marry you.”
A smile exploded across Jay’s face. He hugged Crisp so tightly that his feet left the floor.
“You have no idea how happy you’ve made me.
I doubt I’ll be a very good husband, but I’m also not dumb enough to let you get away.
You know I still have a long way to go to escape the past, and you deserve better than me, but you can’t know how happy I am right now. ”
Crisp kissed him.
Jay’s rambling died a swift death as their tongues caressed.
Jay pulled away for a second and put the ring on Crisp’s finger before coming back for more.
They couldn’t get close enough. Their bodies rubbed against each other like trying to get beneath each other’s skin.
They stumbled from the shower, trying to break their kiss as little as possible as they made their way to the bed.
Crisp already knew they would regret soaking their bed coverings later.
At that moment, nothing mattered except celebrating this miracle.
Crisp couldn’t think clearly enough to notice Jay getting him lubed.
He didn’t see anything other than Jay’s sexy, scar-covered chest and arms. Somehow each raised mark made him look twice as sexy—like a warrior.
Crisp’s head was all over the place. This man was really his.
Jay wanted them to be permanent. He had never been happier.
“Please?” The plea came from so deep inside his soul that it took Crisp a second to realize it came from him.
Jay’s gaze snapped to hold his stare. He looked more aroused than Crisp had ever seen him. Jay didn’t look as if he tried to control the dark parts of himself. He was his truest self, and Crisp thought he was beautiful.
Of course, Jay never thought what Crisp expected. “I don’t ever want to hear you beg again. You’re too perfect for that. People should be on their knees for a second of your attention.”
His heart couldn’t take the overwhelming way Jay made him feel. “I don’t know. I begged the universe for you. Look how that turned out. I’d definitely do it again.”
His confession seemed to send Jay over the edge.
In a flash, Crisp was folded up like a pretzel with Jay’s cock pounding him and Jay's tongue in his mouth. All thought vanished again. There was nothing but sensation. His breath left in small huffs from the power of Jay’s thrusts.
Jay smothered any sounds he might make. A constant vibration shook his throat from the way he couldn’t stop moaning. Jay kept swallowing each one.
Crisp’s entire focus was on the way Jay’s cock hit at the right angle. His body burned and tingled. Crisp’s brain had turned off. All he knew was pleasure and love.
Jay tore his mouth away. His face looked strained. “Fuck, Crisp. I’m so in love with you. You brought me to life. How did you do this impossible thing? Holy shit. You feel perfect on my dick.”
Crisp couldn’t form words. All he could do was stare and feel. He felt everything. The way Jay moved and the words he spoke held Crisp captivated.
Jay closed his eyes, and Crisp watched him visibly crawl closer to the edge.
Then Jay whimpered and Crisp went flying.
His body jerked as the pleasure overwhelmed him.
He cried out and Jay pumped faster. Crisp’s cum hit Jay’s chest. As if that was what Jay needed to send him over the edge, Jay cried Crisp’s name.
When Jay finally collapsed on him, Crisp found his tongue. “I love you too.”
Jay laughed.
The sound had Crisp smiling like an idiot. Jay had really asked Crisp to marry him. Crisp had agreed, and Jay gave him a soul-shaking orgasm. Life only needed one more thing to make his existence perfect: his brothers’ blessing.
The moment Jett bolted upright and yelled he was late for work, Jay’s eyes had shot open. Jett was out the door without a single goodbye. Jay had rolled over with every intention of going back to sleep. Then he had heard the shower, and he couldn’t have been more awake.
Jay had thought he wasn’t nervous until he was on one knee and Crisp said no.
He hadn’t experienced a punch to his chest like that his entire life.
Thank God Crisp hadn’t meant no to his proposal.
For a second there, he had thought the pain would kill him.
Now he held the entire world, and he honestly couldn’t contain the joy.
“Wow. You really said yes. Have you lost your mind?”
Crisp wheezed with laughter, making Jay realize he still squashed Crisp.
“Sorry.” He rolled to his side and then sat up.
Jay jumped out of bed and jogged to the bathroom.
He came back with a washcloth and cleaned their skin.
He winced as he climbed back into bed afterward.
“We really soaked this bedding. Come on.” He lifted Crisp from the bed and headed for the couch.
The blanket he had woken up with was the perfect size and thickness to wrap them in and stay warm.
With Crisp in his lap, Jay stared at him while love swelled in his chest. He couldn’t believe Crisp actually intended to marry him.
Truthfully, they already lived as if they were married.
An exchange of vows would change nothing, but knowing Crisp was legally bound to him meant everything to Jay. Crisp was special in every way to him.
“Your expression is so intense. What are you thinking?”
A smile snapped to Jay’s lips. “I’m looking at you. You make me feel intense things. I’m not surprised that shows on my face.”
Crisp’s blinding smile was worth the confession. “Your eyes are blood-red. That must’ve been some hard partying that went on last night.”
“I had fun.” That surprised Jay more than anyone else. “Jett was a good sport, especially since I cheated.”
Crisp groaned. “Oh no. You humiliated that poor guy, and you cheated?”
Jay shook his head. “That was only when we played poker. The makeup was a dare. Since neither of us has makeup, it was also an excuse to get him to take me out. Then I hit him with a second dare to shop with me like that while I bought your ring. I wasn’t too hard on him.”
Crisp’s smile warmed everything inside Jay. He wanted to stay just like this forever. “So what kind of dares did you have to do?”
Jay shrugged. “Nothing. I wasn’t dumb enough to choose dares. Sticking with truths is much better. Less risk.”
“Hmm. Smart. Would you accept a dare from me?”
There was nothing Jay wouldn’t do for Crisp. “Of course.”
“I dare you to kiss me.”
Jay furrowed his brow. “That’s not a real dare.”
Crisp’s eyebrows rose. “Are you refusing?”
To hell with that. Jay covered Crisp’s mouth with his.
Once he started, Jay didn’t want to stop.
He would never get too much of this. His heart yearned for more every second.
Sometimes, the realization would strike him again how much life had changed.
How much he had changed. Jay pulled away a hair.
“You just own me. You know that, right?” He went back to kissing Crisp, stealing his chance to answer.
It wasn’t like he needed to hear Crisp agree.
The truth was the truth. If Crisp hadn’t carried him half dead from that house, even if Jay had somehow survived, this wouldn’t have been his future.
Jay likely would have gone the same route as the bodies surrounding him.
Since the Russian government had to believe he was dead, Jay would simply have sold his services through the underground.
But this right here, this kiss that owned his entire soul, this was Crisp’s doing.
Patience and kindness, with tons of friendship and human touch, had inch by inch stolen Jay.
He wouldn’t want things any other way. Still, sometimes it fucked with his head a little.
Sometimes it was hard for him to accept all the changes he had been through.
Life didn’t feel real. Maybe he had died and somehow made it to heaven.
Only the sheer knowledge of how that would never happen let him know this was reality now.
He didn’t deserve this life. Jay still intended to cling to this beautiful thing for as long as possible anyway.
Maybe he would win the lottery in life and Crisp would never see he loved a monster.
Jay would do everything in his power to make that day never came.
Crisp chuckled against his lips. “It’s your turn to dare me to do something now.”
The heat in Crisp’s voice was hard to ignore, but Jay wasn’t ready to leave this spot. “You already accepted the ultimate dare when you agreed to marry me.”
Crisp rolled his eyes. “That wasn’t a challenge.”
“Yeah?” Jay couldn’t stop smiling. “Yet you think my kissing you is?”
“Oh, well.” Crisp sniffed and then shrugged. “I just wanted a kiss.”
Damn. Jay really was the happiest man alive. “Yeah, well. I just want to marry you.”
“It’s a good thing neither one of us is weak.”
They held each other’s stare. Jay swore he could hear Crisp’s thoughts. They matched his. Things were about to get very real, and they were equally up to the challenge.